>Twilights final exams were to be held exactly two days from now in Canterlot
>more specifically, in Celestias School for Gifted Unicorns, and were to be conducted by Celestia herself (for obvious reasons)
>because of this, Twilight decided it would be nice to have all her friends accompany her for moral support
>especially since she has no idea what the test will entail
>but why she decided to drag me along, I'll probably never know for sure
>I can only guess it was at the express request of a certain yellow and pink pegasus
>the same yellow and pink pegasus that drugged a ballroom of ponies and went so far as to even try to kill me
>the same pegasus that I found licking the glue on an envelope that I put into the mailbox
>I really don't think I'll be able to put up with this shit if she's in such close proximity to me for two days...
>and that's not even with the added bonus of an all powerful ruler who I am sure is helping her in her deluded plots...
>but, I digress, I'm here for Twilight, and she's gonna have my support
>speaking of "here", we just so happen to be a very short distance from the city
>we decided to use a carriage this time, instead of mass teleportation
>and by we, I mean me and Rainbro
>I don't think the others would've caved if it weren't for her, so I owe her another one
>Fluttershy offered up the idea that she could carry me to Canterlot on my back, if I was that averse to the teleporting
>I very hastily declined her offer
 
 
>as we arrived in Canterlot, I decieded to not make too much of a big deal out of Fluttershy
>it doesn't take us too long to get in front of castle, where the horses pulling the carriage let us out and began removing our luggage
>and by "our luggage", I mean one bag per each of us, and 7 suitcases for Rarity
>so far, we are off to a good start, and I just hope it can stay that way for at least the majority of the visit
>I realize this is wishful thinking as I notice Fluttershy trying to get past the security mechanism that is the zipper on my bag
>can't even get a break for one day...
>I grab my bag from her hooves and make my way towards the front gate of the castle
>I begin to push open the gate, but get stopped by two spears in front of my face
>"Who goes there?"
>are you kidding me?
"Anon? You know, the only human in Equestria?"
>the guards stare at me, but make no move to let me pass
>for fuc- I go back to Twilight and let her lead us through
>the guards see her and just allow her to go
>they continue staring at me as I follow behind
 
 
>we all made our way towards our own little corner of the castle, where there is a room for each of us
>as they all start making their way towards their room, I head towards mine and slam the door behind me as I enter
>a small "Eeep!" is heard from right outside my door
>/sigh, Fluttershy...
>I wait for her to leave my door and enter her room before going about my business
>I set my bag on the bed
>in my bag is 4 shirts, 4 pants, various underwear and socks, and all necessary toiletries
>it was extremely hot in the carriage, so I decide to change my shirt, in the privacy of the bathroom
>I go in, remove my shirt, and then notice that there is a hole about the size of my fist being cut into my wall
>I simply wait with my face directly in front of the hole
>as the piece of wall is disconnected from the rest of the wall and fall away, I see a blue-teal eye pop up
>when she see me staring at her, she lets out a yelp and runs away
>I start stuffing my shirt into the hole, think better of it, and stuff an extra toilet paper roll in it sideways
>I put on my shirt, splash some water on my face, and leave the bathroom
>no sooner had I walked out than I saw Fluttershy floating outside my window
>I move to close the curtains, only to realize my window doesn't have any...
>I take the blanket from my bed and drape it over the window
>unfortunately, that isn't going to work too well at night
>I throw my shirt in the hamper and zip up my bag
>it seems about time for dinner, so I go out to ask Twilight about it, and she informs me that Celestia is having us as guests of honor with a small feast
>sounds good to me
>we tell all the girls and make our way to the dining hall
 
 
>once we are all at the dining hall, we proceed to seat ourselves anywhere we want
>Twilight sits next to Celestia
>Rarity sits as far from Blueblood as ponily possible
>Pinkie won't be constrained to one seat, and is playing musical chairs to a song only she hears
>I take a seat near the middle, Rainbow on my right, Applejack on her right, and Fluttershy directly in front of me
>there is some light conversation among everyone, and eventually the food comes out
>generic stuff that is impossible for me to digest comes along and is placed in front of the others
>when a servant sits a platter in front of me, it takes every ounce of willpower not to cry when I see that they're serving me fish
>there is a giant taboo among everyone about eating meat, so it's pretty hard for me to find any by myself
>when I took a bite of the fish, I had to bite back another wave of tears
>"Hey are you alright? You don't look too good."
> I turn to see Rainbro asking, and then swallow
"Y-yeah, I'm fine, don't worry."
>not long after this, Fluttershy started a very fake coughing fit
>she lifted a hoof, to cover her mouth, but a large puff of white powder flew towards me
>a simple flap of the wings from the blue pegasus next to me sent the powder veering away
>and straight towards Blueblood, and he then proceeded to take a very abrupt nap in his daisy soup
 
 
>this caught a few glances, but no one seemed too bothered
>man, everyone must hate him
>I turn to Rainbro
"You know, I don't think I could ever repay you for the help you give me."
>"I can think of a way..."
"And what is it?"
>"N-nothing! I'm sure you'll figure something out, it's not that big of a deal anyway!"
>well that wasn't much help
>ah well
>desert was a good sized portion of some great looking ice cream for each of us
>Fluttershy reached across the table
>"H-here, let me add some sprinkles... I-if you don't mind..."
> I did mind, and I let her know, but she didn't pay me any mind and added the "sprinkles"
>I immediately noticed that they were tranquilizers
>I pushed the ice cream away, and awaited the end of dinner
Fluttershy...
 
 
>after dinner is over, Celestia invites us to a visit in her gardens
>I try to say no, but Celetia won't hear it and levitates me towards the exit
>everyone else seems to quite enjoy the sight of me being man handled with magic
>unfortunately, I can't share in their revelry, seeing as I'm being man handled by magic...
>Celestia lets me loose once we get to the gardens, and I decide to see the entire thing through
>I walk over to the nearest tree and just lean on it
>Twilight and Celestia sit at a small table, apparently where they sat when Twilight was learning under her
>Pinkie is confused by the lack of candy
>Applejack is confused by the lack of apple trees
>Rarity is just trying to stay as far from nature as possible
>Dash seems to be glancing towards me a bit
>can't imagine why, there aren't any interesting plants near me
>now where is...... ah, she's standing beside me....
>and holding a bright string
>he points over to what can only be described as the simplest trap in existence
>it's a very large box, being held up by a stick, which has the same bright string tied around it
>"I think you left something over there, A-anon..."
>I hadn't even been over there
>I look closely and see that underneath the box is something white
>I walk up to the box and see that it is a roll of toilet paper
>the roll I used earlier to plug the hole...
>I grab hold of the edge of the box, walk under the box, and grab the roll
>she pulls the stick out, but I'm still holding the box
>I walk out from under the box and let it fall
>she's already scurried away, so there's nothing I can do about that
Jesus Fluttershy...
 
 
>after the whole "trap" thing, I went back to the others
>Pinkie announced an idea to go walking through the more wooded part of the garden
>from the confused expression on her face, I doubt it was really her idea
>we all start walking through the garden, Rainbro on my right, Fluttershy on my left, and everyone else up ahead
>"Umm, Rainbow, you should umm, go up ahead with the others..."
>she looks up to me with a worried look, and I just shrug
>"Sure, I'll go."
>after she was with the others, Fluttershy pointed me to an odd looking flower
>"That on looks like it smells great! You s-should smell one!"
>she takes a bit longer than I would deem necessary to pick a single flower, but runs back with one nonetheless
>I could see that it was in fact just a spray bottle with some colorful paper glued to the nozzle
>"D-do you want a sniff?"
>based on the excitement present in her eyes, I could tell she really thought she fooled me with it
>I decide to play along
>I lean in and get close to the "flower"
>I raise my hand, turn the bottle around and spray her in the face
>she looked confused for a second, then sneezed twice, and passed out
 
 
>I throw the bottle into the brush and pick her up, putting her over my shoulder
>I catch up to the rest of the group and tell them Fluttershy was just too tired, so I would take her to to her room and lay her down
>the walk to our rooms was uneventful, thankfully, so I opened her door and walked in
>the first thing I notice is that she has curtains...
>I lay her down on her bed and pull back the covers
>which is when I see a picture of me and the sweaty shirt I had thrown in the hamper
>even worse, sweat wasn't the only liquid on the shirt
>honestly, where the hell does she even get the time to do this shit, it isn't possible...
>I retrieve the picture and shirt, and then cover her
>after that, she moans and mumbles
>"Oh anon, not there, it's too dirty...!"
Fucking fuck?
 
 
>wake up feeling refreshed, and the only thought I let worm through my mind is that I'm sure Fluttershy couldn't have done anything to me last night
>I wish I could wake up feeling like this more often...
>...maybe I should've kept that spray bottle...
>ah well, no use regretting something
>I go to the bathroom with a new set of clothes, and all necessary toiletries
>after stuffing my clean towel into the hole, I get undressed
>I open the shower curtains and nearly fall when I see Fluttershy snuggled up to the same shirt from last night
>and I think it's even slimier than before...
>I cover my shame with the mostly transparent shower curtain
"How the hell are you even awake!"
>"Oh, well, um, I think that s-since I use it so m-much, it doesn't affect me as much..."
>son of a bitc-
"GET OUT!"
>after she leaves, I get in the shower and turn on the water
>the water isn't spraying
>I look up and see a camera hastily taped into place
>she really didn't think that one through...
>or any of her other plans, I suppose...
>I get clean and dressed quickly
>I glance at the shirt and decide to burn it before I leave Canterlot
>I open the door to leave my room
>all the girls are waiting for me, they all look pretty impatient
>apparently they sent Fluttershy in to wake me up so we could all leave and eat breakfast at Pony Joes
>also apparently, but not to the others, Fluttershy got a little carried away
"Whatever, let's get going then."
FlutterWHY?