>Take your fluffy pony to an amusement park
>The name or Midwestern city it's located in is unimportant
>You ask your fluffy what he wants to do first
>"Wide bumpy caws!" he says, wagging his tail
>You head over to the bumper cars and wait in the short line
>When your turn comes, the ride operator takes your fluffy
>He places it in a miniature car without a steering wheel
>Before you can say anything, he hands you a remote control
>You're then escorted to an area with the other owners
>The operator explains that you control your fluffy's car
>The remotes are pretty simple, two sticks and a turbo button
>With the flip of a switch, the cars are activated
>Everyone takes it easy, the fluffies find it fun
>Slowly bumping and giggling
>It's all so...boring
>You decide to increase the speed a bit
>Your pony smacks into another
>It's owner gets mad and speeds up as well
>Soon the cars are zooming along, smashing into each other
>The fluffies are panicking, crying "Wan stop, no wike wide!"
>Time to try turbo
>Fluffy's are being ejected on impact now
>They're getting crushed and dragged by passing cars
>Red smears run along the track
>Their screams and cries drown out the music
>Then the ride suddenly stops, surviving fluffies are returned
>Owners of dead ones are given coupons
>Yours managed to survive but he won't stop shivering
>As they hose off the ride, you ask your fluffy where he wants to go next
>"Wan go home" he says
>You laugh, these park tickets are non-refundable
>He's got a long day of fluffy friendly fun ahead of him