>Aryanne lay next to you, snoozing away
>you swear to Celestia you were scared shitless
>there is more to your life than your selfish, old self
>you had a motherland to defend
>yet here you are
>having one of the biggest aggressors against everything you stand for not only in the same room as you
>but in the same bed
 
>she wiped the blood out of your yellow eyes
>defended you against her own countrymen
>you slowly got out of bed and looked yourself in the mirror
>who had you become?
>you hadn't seen your home in months, you didn't have the luxury for such simple vices
>thoughts sprung back from all the village ponies you used to laugh and play with when you were young
>you sigh
>kids always think they're smarter than adults until they grow up and see that life is hard when you're adult
>looking back to the happy little filly you once was, playing in the streets with the other children during the beautiful springs of youth
>you truly can not recognize yourself anymore
>you felt like chocking up but nothing ever came of it
>was it the war?
>did it desensitize you?
>were you on your way to become like the Nazi sharing your bed?
>you felt sick just thinking about it
>had you been any other pony she just happened to NOT get emotionally attached to she would have killed you by now
>if you were lucky
>if you were unlucky she would have made it slow and utterly agonizing
>your disgust for the things she did was obvious
>and if you were in the unfortunate position that she didn't see you differently you don't know what you would do
>probably curse her name the moment before she would have snuffed you out
>you glance to the corner of the bunker door
 
>your trusty rifle lay ever vigilant and ready for use
>if you did it now she would be a sleep as the bullet passed through her skull
>no pain
>no final words of disbelief about how could you 'betray' her like that
>death was a gentle punishment for what she's done to ponykind
>how many lives she's taken
>how much suffering she's caused
>she deserved a whole lot more than a peaceful death
>despite this you didn't hate her
>you hated what she was, what she stood for, what she did
>but you didn't hate the pony Aryanne
>not that your irrational feelings towards her excused her for the crimes she had done, and will do to the motherland in the future, should she live
>and that's why you were so selfish
>the motherland, hell. The entirety of Equestria would be a better place without this mare around to murder, plunder and torture anything she can excuse for being 'impure' or 'lesser'
>and here you were with all the resources needed to kill her and more
>yet the only thing going through your mind was the texture of her coat
>her constant jabs at you and your ideology
>her laughter
>the way when faced between a secure transport home to her fatherland with 3 handsome stallions she choose to murder them unprovoked instead of joining them in finishing you off
>and the way she spilled her guts in front off you, knowing damn well you could have ridiculed her for being 'weak'
>she wasn't weak
>you were weak for wanting her for yourself
>in believing that somehow this could all work out like in the ponytales of old
>you were weak because instead of going for your rifle, you lay down to bed again
>you were weak because you longed for her embrace and warmth
>you were weak because you kept telling yourself act justice in the names of every comrade fallen under her hoof, some other night
>Aryanne's needy hooves found your torso and pulled you towards her in a sleepy hug
>you lean your head against her soft mane
>you swear to Celestia you were scared shitless