"Why the sudden interest in my well-being, anyway?" I ask.
 
"Ah!" Misha says. "Shii-kun says that it's the duty of the Student Council to keep track of the emotional health of its students! To allow a cons-constituent to spiral into depression unchecked would be an unforgivable failure in the council's duties!"
 
"Well, that's easy, then," I say to the pink-haired boy with the afro. "I'm not depressed."
 
"But you're eating alone, and nobody's seen you and Kyo-chan together at all!" Misha sighs. "Something happened, didn't it, Hicchan?"
 
Misha's voice takes on a slightly sterner tone, although he keeps the familiar lilt at the end of his sentences.
 
Well, I suppose someone else knowing about my problem can't hurt. . . heck, maybe Misha can even offer some advice.
 
"We had a fight," I admit. "And I don't understand why."
 
"Oh? What happened?" Misha asks, sitting across from me.
 
"Well, you know that the two of us went on a double-date with Linus and Hayato last week, right?"
 
"Right," Misha says.
 
"Well. . . she and Hayato had a lousy time. I guess she didn't like him, and they got into a fight. Afterwards, she stopped talking to me. I guess she's mad at me for setting them up."
 
"Oh," Misha says. "Have you talked to her since then?"
 
Misha looks genuinely concerned. I'm surprised, as I'd almost expected him to drop the subject after finding out what the trouble was. Even more surprising is how quickly I find myself spilling my guts to him.
 
"No. . . I haven't," I admit. "I just. . . I don't know what's wrong! What if she's still mad at me? If I talk to her, I'll just make things worse, right?"
 
 
Misha smiles. "You're silly, Hicchan."
 
"Huh?"
 
He stands up in his chair and launches into a speech that would sound better coming from Shizune.
 
"THE SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM IS SIMPLE!" he shouts. Then he points to me like a prophet handing down the word of God from on high. "KYOKO IS OBVIOUSLY IN LOVE WITH YOU! THE SOLUTION IS THAT YOU TWO MUST SMOOSH YOUR VAGINAS TOGETHER!"
 
My fist connects with his jaw with a satisfying thump. "YOU COMPLETE PERV!" I scream, stomping on his prone body over and over. "AND HERE I THOUGHT YOU WERE ACTUALLY BEING NICE FOR A CHANGE!"
 
I give Shinji's head one more stomp then grab my bag and storm off.
 
"Hey, Hicchan," Misha asks.
 
"What?"
 
"Where are you going?"
 
"To talk with Kyoko! And no, we will not smoosh vaginas together, you stupid pervert, we're just going to talk!"
 
He gives me a broad grin and a thumbs up, only marred slightly by the bloody nose he's developing.
 
"Right on!" he laughs. "I'm rooting for you!"
 
For a moment, I wonder if Misha's really smarter than he lets on. . . but I soon push that thought out of my mind.
 
He's just a stupid pervert, right?
 
Right?
 
-----
 
By the time I reach her room, my determination has subsided greatly.
 
What the heck am I doing? This isn't going to end well.
 
Kyoko's mad at me, and nothing I say to her can change that, right?
 
I should just go.
 
I take a deep breath and walk away from the door. . . but as I do, my bookbag bumps into it.
 
Almost immediately, I hear the door open. . . and I realize, to my surprise, that the door had been unlocked the entire time.
 
-----
 
Kyoko stands in the doorway, staring at me through her huge, coke-bottle glasses.
 
"Hisako," she says softly.
 
"Kyoko."
 
"You knocked?"
 
"Um. . . yeah," I admit. "Can I come in?"
 
Kyoko doesn't respond, but a moment later, she steps out of the doorway and lets me in.
 
I follow her in, unsure what I'll find there.
 
-----
 
As it turns out, her room is surprisingly normal. I'd expected there to be a wall full of guns or a storm shelter or a giant poster talking about the evils of men on it, but it's just your ordinary girls' room.
 
The only thing that's in any ways unusual is the very large and very prominent stungun located next to the bed.
 
"What's that for?" I ask.
 
"In case rapists come after me during the night," Kyoko says. "That way I'll always have a weapon on hand."
 
"Oh."
 
I walk inside and sit down in her chair, as Kyoko sits down on the bed. "I wanted to apologize for the way we fought," I tell her. "I was wrong. I'm sorry."
 
Kyoko glares at me from under her messy short bangs. "Don't do that," she hisses.
 
"Don't do what?"
 
"Apologize for something you didn't do wrong!" she shouts. "It's the same way after that date!"
 
"I'm sorry?"
 
"AAAARGH!" Kyoko jumps off the bed and stalks back and forth. "Hisako, this is exactly the sort of thing that pisses me off about you! Why do you keep apologizing for what you didn't do wrong!?" She grabs me by the shoulders, her eyes gleaming angrily. "Look, I'm not mad you set me up on that stupid date with the burned boy. He's kind of a jerk, but I was willing to go out on that date because I knew you had a crush on his friend. But you know what pissed me off? When you apologized for him showing me a bad time! Why should you apologize for things that aren't your fault!?"
 
"But. . . but I feel responsible!" I point out. "I set you two up!"
 
"I agreed to go! I knew what that date was going to be like! I went anyway! So don't you dare apologize for me. My lousy time was my own fault, and I'm willing to accept that!"
 
"I don't see what you're so mad about!" I complain. "Why should you care?"
 
"BECAUSE THAT'S HOW IT STARTS!" she screams.
 
There is a sudden silence in the room.
 
"FIRST YOU FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR THINGS THAT AREN'T YOUR FAULT!" she screams. "THEN YOU START FEELING LIKE EVERYTHING'S YOUR FAULT! AND BECAUSE OF THAT, YOU LET PEOPLE WALK ALL OVER YOU, AND YOU LET THEM DO THINGS THAT. . ." her voice trails off. "that you're not ready for. . ."
 
Her face falls as I realize what it is that she's admitting.
 
"Kyoko. . . what happened. . . ?"
 
A sick smile twists her face.
 
"You never wondered why I'm always ranting about rapists?" she whispers.
 
Oh no.
 
A look of self-loathing comes over her. "The worst part is when you start feeling like maybe it was your fault it happened. Maybe you shouldn't have gone out with that boy. Maybe you shouldn't have led him on that night. Maybe you shouldn't have worn that short skirt, or kissed him good night. And then, eventually, you start feeling like maybe you really want it after all." She laughs bitterly. "You know what made me finally break up with him? He shared me with his friends. That's when I realized I wasn't his girlfriend after all. I was just the whore he liked to fuck."
 
"Kyoko. . ." my mouth is dry.
 
She laughs again. "I can't believe I was ever that blind. . ." She takes off her glasses, rubbing at her eyes. "So you gotta promise me you won't go down that path, girl. Don't let them start blaming you for things that aren't your fault. Because once you start down that path, you're not going to like where it ends up. . ."
 
I reach out and hug her tightly. "It's okay," I whisper. "It's okay."
 
"Hisako."
 
She holds me close to her, and I feel her heart beat next to mine.
 
"It's all right," she says. But then, with a small, sarcastic laugh, "but if you ask me to go on another double date with those two, you're on your own."
 
"It's all right," I say back. "It's not gonna happen anyway. Linus turned me do--"
 
I feel my voice crack as my paradigm shifts.
 
What was it Linus had said?
 
"I'm sorry, Hisako. But I can't go out with you. I'm not the one you love."
 
Hayato.
 
"Why don't you just eat out that half-blind friend of yours, then? I'm sure she'd enjoy it."
 
Misha
 
"THE SOLUTION IS THAT THE TWO OF YOU MUST SMOOSH YOUR VAGINAS TOGETHER!"
 
Oh gods.
 
Did everyone see it but me?"
 
Emotion flows through me like a river as I realize the truth.
 
I'm in love with Kyoko. I have been since the day that I first came to really know her.
 
I feel like the world is spinning around me. I'm about to lose control. All I can do is cling tightly. . . and I don't ever want to let go.
 
On an impulse, I rise up and press my lips to hers.
 
My heart is pounding. Her lips feel soft, and her mouth is warm and wet. I want to wrap my arms around her and kiss her, to hold her tight, to make sure she never leaves. . .
 
Oh my god.
 
I realize what I just did, and back off, my eyes wide in terror.
 
How could I do that to a girl who's been through all that Kyoko has been through?
 
She's standing there in the center of her room, poleaxed by my sudden impulse. "I'm sorry!" I whimper. "I was wrong! I shouldn't have. . ."
 
She grabs me by the wrist and pulls me in close, hugging me to her chest.
 
"What did I tell you about apologizing for things that aren't your fault?" she whispers to me.
 
I feel a thrill of excitement run through me as she kisses me back.
 
-----
 
We tumble into her bed, shedding clothes left and right, gasping for breath between kisses. Her hand brushes across my chest and cups my breast, and I inhale sharply at the delicious thrill of pleasure she sends through me.
 
Our bodies intertwine as our sweaty skin presses against each other. Kyoko's arms wrap around my neck, caressing my bare back, stroking my hip, then running down the front of my thigh to press between my legs.
 
I throw back my head and let out a strangled gasp of pleasure as her fingers enter me. They probe between my lips, caressing the inside of my walls, making my spine tingle with the sensation.
 
Her teeth nibble lightly at my ear as she rubs her entire naked body against mine, pressing herself so close to me it feels as if she's trying to envelop all of me within herself. Her fingers move faster and faster, sending the waves of pleasure up my spine at closer and closer intervals.
 
When it comes, it hits me hard. I throw my head back and scream out her name at my moment of climax.
 
As I do, I see her face loom above mine.
 
Her dark, shadowed eyes are happy for the first time I can remember.
 
-----
 
"I could really use a cigarette right now," she admits, afterwards. "But there's no smoking allowed in the dorms."
 
"It's not good for me anyway," I point out. "I have a heart condition, remember?"
 
"Oh, right." She shakes her head. "I guess that's a habit I'll need to quit."
 
I lay next to her on the bed, running my hand along her bare thigh.
 
"So where do we go from here?" I ask.
 
"Well," she says, smiling down at me. "First, we get a shower and wash off."
 
"Then?"
 
"We'll see where washing in the shower takes us." She leans down and kisses me gently on the lips.
 
I smile back up at her. It's not exactly the way I'd expected this to turn out when I first came here, but the feeling's a good one, anyway.
 
. . . although it doesn't make me feel good to have to admit that Misha was right, in the end.