>You are a traveler
>You travel from one plane of reality, from one dimension to another.
>You do this via Persphoniac Corridor opened, under the right circumstances, by an implant in your head.
>Due to the innate strangeness of this particular dimension, your implant has ceased to function.
>Or more accurately, cannot read from its own memory storage.
>You usually travel in pairs, if this happens to one implant (Which it very, very rarely does),
>There is enough difference built into the data retrieval system between the units that your partners will probably work.
>And if neither of them work, it’s unlikely that physics is playing fair.
>This happens (very rarely), usually in dimensions made by hideous cosmic assholes. (Metaphorical assholes, it’s important to clarify.)
>Dimensions where probability is stretched and skewed until the value for Murphy’s law is very deliberately set to :true
>What can possibly go wrong must, in fact, go wrong.
>In these dimensions, it’s unlikely the travelers will be functioning for long, much less their implants.
>Equestria is not such a place. Equestria is a paradise.
>A paradise you're trapped in.
 
 
>Your eyes open and you see, arrayed above your head like the points of a pentagram, five pony heads.
>In addition to the fascinating Twilight Sparkle there is now a yellow pony with a curious expression, a pink pony with a sober expression, a white pony with an eyebrow raised, and a blue pony with a big grin.
>The blue pony leans over and prods your face a little.
>”Whoa Twilight! You killed a monster in your library!”
>”I didn’t kill him! He just collapsed! I’ve tried healing spells on him but they do nothing! Applejack brought him to me earlier but I think she kicked him really hard in the head.”
>”Applejack huh? That figures. No offence Twi, but I wondered how you managed to kill a monster without, like, just blowing it up.”
>”Do you think we should get a doctor?” the yellow pony asks?
>She was too quiet for the rest to hear.
>”Neeegh” you offer, and sit up, causing them to jump back.
 
 
>”Anonymous! I was worried! You passed out and none of my healing spells had any effect on you! I’ve never had this happen before!”
>You want to put her at ease, tell her that due to your body having a startlingly different physiology than anything in her world, most energy fields and other stimuli designed to act upon life-forms completely gloss over you as a living being.
>Twilight could easily pick you up, or blow you up or use the full extent of her powers on you just as she would on, say, a chair.
>Something designed for healing a living thing though, would probably react as if you had tried to use it on a chair.
>That is to say, it wouldn’t.
>But that’s too many words for someone who’s sustained multiple head blows, fainted, and learned that they’re trapped far away from home with no chance of escape, ever, in the last few hours.
>Instead you just say: “S’cool Twilight, I’m good.” Pat her on the shoulder reassuringly, and get to your feet.
>Twilight is calmed down by your assurance and you are introduced to the rest of her friends.
>Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash.
>Applejack is harvesting apples still it seems, or she would be hanging out with the rest of them.
>Having seen ‘the human’ and asked a few questions, they excuse themselves and go on their way.
>Fluttershy shyly informs you that you are unlike any animal she had ever seen, but if you needed any help, medically, she’ll gladly do what she can.
>Rainbow tells you it was good to meet you, slaps you on the back and mentions she has to start the weather, whatever that means.
 
 
>Pinky Pie smiles and says to come by Sugarcube Corner for a treat anytime. Twilight and Rarity look at her strangely when she leaves.
>”It’s strange,” remarked Rarity, the clothing designer “I don’t believe I’ve seen Pinkie so subdued since…” She shoots you a glance as if she’s worried about revealing a private matter to you. “Since she went insane and replaced us with inanimate objects.”
>You decide not to ask for any clarification on that.
>Twilight explains to you that usually Pinkie Pie throws a party for anyone that comes to Ponyville.
>You’re not offended in the least, people being slightly weary of you is a far cry from the treatment you normally get in a new world, best symbolized by pitchforks and torches.
>The three of you walk the short distance to Rarity’s Boutique, you still wearing the towel, and she fits you for some pants and a shirt.
>She throws them together in about an hour, and very graciously gives them to you free of charge.
>You have to convince her not to cover them in ‘common’ emeralds and diamonds.
 
 
 
 
>As you return to the Library with Twilight, something feels wrong to you though.
>The optimism you felt earlier has vanished.
>Ponyville, while a very pleasant place, is now a place you are forced to be in.
>A bright, shiny, candy-colored prison
>You realize that you’re subconsciously planning escape routes out of the town.
>Triangulating the distance to the far away tree line.
>Checking each flower cart, each mare with saddlebags, for tell-tale signs of hidden weapons.
>It’s useless. Escaping the town is easy but without your implant you’re trapped on this world.
>The two of you stop for lunch (bitter flowers)and you explain the situation to Twilight.
>You don’t know what to expect from her. Will she pity you? Will she scoff at your problem, wonder why her world isn’t good enough?
>Not Twilight.
>Twilight fixes problems.
 
 
>In the basement of the hollow tree of the library, there is a machine.
>In less than an hour the machine compiles a rough sketch of your head, locating the implant in your brain.
>This by far the most technological advanced thing you’ve seen in ponyville.
>Twilight had seemed very confident she could locate the implant.
>She was at a loss as to how to fix it, or even reach it without damaging your brain.
>But her plan now, was to collect as much data as possible and take it to the highest authority on technology and magic in Equestria.
>Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns.
>She worships her teacher, the leader of Equestria.
>Literally.
>As she tells you about the Princess certain details reach your mind that you hadn’t pieced together
>You’re reminded of what Rainbow Dash said earlier about the weather.
 
 
>”Twilight,” you ask, trying to figure out how to ask it exactly, “Is your weather, and the movement of the sun and the moon, actually done manually?”
>”Well of course” she replied “how else would we do it?”
>”On my world it all just happens. It was set in place by gravity and macroscopic forces a long time before we existed.”
>She looks at you, with a little disbelief and maybe a little awe.
>”Your world sounds like a really wild place Anon.” she says.
>You smile at her.  
>Both of you have things to learn about the other. But Twilight’s favorite thing is to study. You realize that if anyone in this world can solve your problem, it’s Twilight Sparkle.
>A letter is sent to the Princess and an appointment is made.
>The Princess, despite being kept extra busy with guarding the realm, will see both of you in two weeks. Anything for her best student.
>Optimism begins to flow back into your little world of horse puns.
>And for the first time you think of it as your world.
>And all the Clicks in your head won’t wash away that good feeling.
 
 
>While the two of you grin in the basement, a few things happen.
>Right next to you, Spike rolls his eyes.
>Far away, a grave is desecrated, a center fails to hold, and a vast shape begins to slouch toward Ponyville.
>And in someone’s head that isn’t yours, a machine clicks.
>And clicks.
>And clicks.