The pills seemed to be working. Thomas had actually slept six hours that night and two four hour shifts the night before. When he had woken up this morning, he felt better than he had in years. Literally, years. He tried to remember the last time he had felt so refreshed and the fact that he couldn’t made him laugh. When he walked into the tea-room that afternoon after classes were finished, he was actually smiling.
       
        “Good afternoon Hanako, Lilly.” Thomas said in a cheery voice.
       
        Hanako jumped a little at how loud Thomas announced himself and even Lilly seemed taken aback by his newfound forwardness. But, as always, Lilly quickly composed herself while Hanako tried to hide even further under her bangs.
       
        “Good afternoon, Thomas.” Lilly said, “You seem quite chipper this afternoon.”
       
        Thomas took his seat next to Lilly, across from Hanako. There was already a cup set for him and he took it gladly. “Do you think so?” Thomas asked, the smile on his face easily being translated to the tone of his voice.
       
        Lilly nodded “Oh certainly. Wouldn’t you agree Hanako?”
       
        Hanako instinctively held a hand up to her face when Thomas turned to look at her, but she still gave a small smile and said “Y-yes…”
 
        Thomas returned Hanako’s smile with a nod, but she just turned her head down to look at her lap. “Well,“ Thomas said, actually bragging, “you could say I’ve slept more in the past two nights than I have in the past week. Might be one reason I’m so happy.”
       
        “Oh?” Lilly said, her interest peaked, “Has something changed?”
       
        “New meds the doc gave me. Unlike the past twenty something prescriptions I’ve been on, these one’s actually seem to be working.”
       
        “My, my, how wonderful!” Lilly smiled at Thomas, making him smile in return.
       
        “You’re telling me.” Thomas said, trying his best to keep from laughing. He knew he was far too giddy for simply having told his friends about his new sleep schedule. He needed something to take the excitement away.
       
        “So, Hanako,” Thomas began, Hanako jumping again as her name was said aloud, “how do you feel about another game?”
       
        “Of c-course.” she said, standing up to go grab the Chessboard.
       
        As she brought the board to the table and began to set up the pieces Thomas ventured, “And don’t expect me to be as easy an opponent as before. I’ve got a full night of sleep now.”
       
        Lilly laughed polity and Hanako gave an awkward kind of chuckle. Surprisingly, Hanako actually shot back with “D-don’t get y-your hopes up,” in a mock-competitive tone. Thomas raised his eyebrow at this. It seemed just as he was happier than usual, Hanako was a little more competitive than usual.
       
        As soon as the board was set, Hanako grabbed a pawn and said, instinctively reverting to the running commentary she and Thomas kept up for Lilly’s sake, “Pawn, e2 to e4…”
       
        Thomas also grabbed a pawn and said, “Pawn, e7 to e5.”
       
        Hanako grabbed her queen. “Queen to h5.”
Aggressive. That’s something Thomas didn’t expect. “Knight, b2 to c6.”
       
        “Bishop, f1 to c4.”
       
        Now this was strange. Her queen and one of her bishops already out the gate. This was surprisingly forceful for Hanako. Alrighty then, Thomas decided, two could play that game. Better get the second knight on the field as well. “Knight, g8 to f6.”
       
        Now Thomas was in place to take the queen Hanako had so strangely left open to attack. Hanako had no choice but to-
       
        [Awwww, dammit.] Thomas groaned aloud, so distressed by what he just realized that he couldn’t help but curse, instinctively in English.
       
        “What’s wrong?” Lilly asked, concerned.
       
        Thomas put his hand to his face and, getting back into Japanese, said “I’m an idiot, that’s what…”
       
        Hanako gave Thomas a smile full of pity and grabbed her queen again. “Queen, h5 to f7. Checkmate.”
       
        Thomas groaned again and tipped his king onto its side. “Oldest trick in the book…” he mumbled under his breath.
       
        “My, my,” Lilly said, “What’s this? So quickly, Thomas?”
       
        Hanako squirmed in her seat nervously and said, “T-the Scholar’s Mate. You seemed e-excited, so I thought I might g-give it a try. I thought you m-might fall for it…”
       
        Thomas was silent for a moment, but then he started laughing. Hanako squirmed even more and blurted out, “I’m s-sorry, I didn’t m-mean to i-insult you or anything, I was just-“
       
        “No, no,” Thomas interrupted, still laughing. He reached out his hand to Hanako, which she shied away from. “It was good intuition on your part. Good game.”
       
        Hanako stared at Thomas’s hand for a bit before slowly taking it and shaking hands. “G-good game…” she replied back, softly.
       
        Lilly took another sip of her tea before saying “Well, Thomas, I can say that I’m glad to hear your laughter again. We were starting to worry you’d never get out of your slump.”
       
        As Thomas went to work setting the pieces back together, he snuck a look at Lilly out of the corner of his eye. If he was honest with himself, he’d have to say see looked the same as ever. Same hairstyle, same uniform, same smile, same perfect posture. But something was different. She looked amazing... But really, nothing about her had changed.
 
        It was then he realized it wasn't really her that had changed, it was him. He had been excited all day to finally get here and talk to Lilly. He had wanted her to be the first person he had told the good news. Heck, he thought, he hadn't even called my parents about this yet.
       
        “Alright” Thomas said, looking back at Hanako once the board was set up again, “For real this time.”
       
        Lilly gave a slight laugh that rang in Thomas’ ears like a bell.
       
        “Pawn, e2 to e4…” Hanako began.
 
----------------------------------------------
 
        After another two losses, Thomas raised his hands in defeat. “Alright, alright I give in!”
       
        Hanako and Lilly laughed. As Thomas began to pack up the chessboard, Lilly added with a sigh “Quite wise of you to do so, Thomas. I gave up trying to win against Hanako long ago.”
       
        “Well, maybe I give in for today,” Thomas said, “but just let me get a couple more nights of good sleep and then we’ll see how well I do.”
       
        Lilly laughed again and said “I wish you the best of luck in that endeavor then.”
       
        “Thanks, I’m guessing I’ll need it.” A silence descended on the room, but not an awkward one. As Thomas placed all the pieces back to where they belong, he smiled, suddenly grateful to have a place such as this to escape to whenever he need. More than that, he thought, he was glad he had friends like Lilly and Hanako to escape to.
 
        Thomas reached for his own teacup, about to lift to take a sip when he felt a sensation deep in his gut. It came and went so fast that he had no idea if it had been pain, but it made Thomas’s heartbeat flutter in surprise, the cup in his hand clattering against the table. Lilly heard Thomas’s breath catch in his throat and she slowly placed her cup on the table, asking “Thomas?”
       
        Thomas took a few breaths, waiting until he was sure the sensation was gone. He slowly stood up, one hand on the table to steady himself. For a moment, the worst word in the world passed through his mind: “Side-Effects.” The Nurse had said that abdominal pain was one of the more common side-effects of the pills he was now on.
Thomas knew that side-effects were always a risk with the kind of medications he took, but they had never bothered him before. The prescriptions normally didn't work anyways, so he was always taken off them before side-effects even began to appear. But this drug he was on now, it was actually working, and to lose the joy of his sleep to the pain of side-effects, after waiting so long for a drug that would work…
       
        “S-sorry,” Thomas said, stuttering a bit as his mind whirled with worries, “I just need to step out for a bit. Probably something I-”
       
        Thomas stopped as the sensation returned, but this time is was clearly pain. A cold hard pain right in his stomach. Thomas groaned and doubled over, his hand on the table gripping the edge so hard that his knuckles were white. Hanako gasped, her hands over mouth in fear, her chair screeching on the floor as she quickly stood up, backing away. Lilly’s voice took on an edge as she said, “Thomas, what is it?”
       
        Thomas didn’t answer, his mind too focused on the pain. This wasn’t just a bad stomach ache, this was a knife, stabbing deep, twisting over and over again, pulling at every nerve. Realizing he was holding his breath, Thomas tried to take a shaky breath, but the very act only made the pain spread to his chest. Grabbing himself around the middle with both arms, Thomas tried to keep the panic away. He had never before felt pain like this. For a brief, terrifying moment he wondered if he was dying.
       
        Another wave of pain erupted within him and with a low moan, Thomas toppled over, crashing to the floor with a loud “Thump!”. He continued to hold himself around his middle, continually applying pressure in hope that it would help, his eyes shut tightly to keep the tears back. He heard Lilly’s chair scrape against the floor and her footsteps as she walked over to Hanako, still cowering in her corner.
       
        “Hanako,” Lilly said, her voice still calm, “You need to go get a nurse.”
       
        “Lilly,” Hanako said shakily, “I c-can’t-”
       
        “Hanako,” Lilly interrupted, her voice a little stronger this time, “I need you to do this for me, alright? Thomas needs help right now and You can go get it faster than I. ”
       
        There was silence for a moment. Lilly said once more, “Hanako, please.“ Then Thomas heard the soft pattering of Hanako’s feet as she ran out of the room. Silence dominated the room once more after the tea room door closed, until another twist of pain made Thomas kick out with his foot, hitting the table and making the tea cups on it shake.
       
        “Thomas, where are you?” Lilly asked. Thomas could hear her footsteps drawing near, softly, cautiously.
 
        Thomas tried to push the pain out of his mind for a moment, just long enough to get words out of his mouth. He tried to speak, to tell Lilly that everything was alright, but all that came out of his mouth was a whimper, like a child. Thomas quickly shut his mouth, the tears flowing from his eyes now stinging with embarrassment at being in this state in from of Lilly. Of all people, he thought bitterly, Lilly had to be the one who Thomas started breaking down in front of.
 
        Thomas rolled over to look at Lilly, still too weak to stand. He was surprised to discover Lilly standing right next to him, one hand held out as if looking for Thomas. Slowly, Thomas reached his own hand out and touched Lilly on the ankle. She didn’t jump back from him, but instead lowered herself so that she was now kneeling on the floor, next to Thomas. Another wave of pain hit Thomas and he released another low groan. Trying to curl up in a ball, Thomas started to bring his head to his knees and only succeeded in bumping his forehead into Lilly’s leg. Lilly simply reached down and put her hand on Thomas’s head with  just enough pressure to keep him still. “Where does it hurt?” Lilly asked
       
        Thomas shook his head, the pain making his mind foggy. “S-s-s-stomach” he barely managed to blurt out.
       
        “Is it the new medicine you‘re on?”
       
        “I d-d-don’t know…” Thomas said, a new wave of pain accompanied by more tears. “I don’t know,” he said once more, his voice to his own ears sounding pitiful and frightened.
 
        Lilly began to stroke Thomas’s head, softly saying, “It’s going to be alright. Hanako’s gone to get a nurse, she’ll be back soon.” She sounded calm, completely unworried. “There’s nothing to worry about, Thomas, you’re going to be alright.”
       
        Another groan slipped past Thomas’s lips and ended in a sob. He thought the pain had been bad before, but now it seemed to be increasing even more. The ice cold knife he had been feeling before was now heating up, becoming a searing pin that pricked him over and over again. Now more than just tears of pain on his cheek, Thomas was crying, his breathing ragged with sobbing. If the pain was just a little less, he might have cared about the fact that he was crying in front of Lilly, but at the moment all he cared about was trying to survive this pain. And, at the very least, the sobbing kept him breathing.
       
        Thomas felt’s Lilly’s hands on his shoulders as she softly said, “Thomas, come here.” Thomas heard her words, but he couldn’t comprehend them, pain taking away any his understanding of what Lilly was asking. When he didn’t respond to Lilly’s command, she simply pulled him, lifting him up slight and placing his head in her lap, as if he were going to go to sleep. With one hand on his head, still petting his hair, and another on his chest, rubbing back and forth slightly in a little circle, Lilly began to sing.
       
        Thomas didn’t hear it at first, the noise lost in his own cries. Slowly though, he began to focus more and more on Lilly’s voice, at first only understanding the raising and lowering of her pitch, eventually finally hearing the words. It took him a further moment to realize she wasn’t singing in Japanese, it was in English.
       
        [-there that we parted, on yon shady glen, on the steep, steep sides o’ Ben Lomon’…]
       
        Thomas focused on Lilly’s voice, focused on nothing else but her words. The pain didn’t lessen any, but he began to push it from his mind. He opened his eyes slightly and looked up at Lilly. She was bent over so that she was face to face with Thomas, mere inches from him. Her hair was falling down around Thomas’s face, the light behind Lilly’s head giving her hair a heavenly glow, like a golden halo.
       
        [Where in soft purple hue, in high’lan hills we view, An’ the moon comin’ out the gloamin’…]
       
        Thomas focused on Lilly’s lips, watching how they moved and formed different shapes to make the sounds of the song. Another stab of pain made Thomas grit his teeth, but he prevented himself from making any noise, not wanting to miss a second of Lilly’s song. He took one of his hands off his stomach and lifted it to his chest, taking a hold of Lilly’s hand. Lilly smiled down at Thomas, returning his grip, still singing.
       
        [Oh, you take the high road, and I’ll take the low, and I’ll be in Scotland a’fore you…]
       
        Thomas heard footsteps and yelling, followed by the door of the tea room being thrown open. In the peripheral of his vision he saw white-coated men rushing into the room, but Thomas continue to stare just at Lilly, her face and voice making up the entirety of his world at that moment. One of the white-coated men knelt down next to him, taking hold of his arm. He felt a pin-prick at the creak of his elbow, a needle, the pain of it laughably small compared to what he was still feeling in his gut. But, slowly, everything began to go away. In the back of his  mind, he realized the nurses were putting him under. Mercifully, the pain disappeared, right after his feeling in his arms and legs did as well. His vision began to get dark, shadows gathering at the edges, until all he could see was Lilly, still surrounded in her golden halo.
       
        Throughout all of this, Lilly continued to sing. The last thing Thomas heard before he finally lost consciousness was Lilly’s voice.
 
        [For me an’ my true love shall ne’er meet again, On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomon’…]
 
----------------------------------------------
 
        When Thomas woke up, the first thing he felt was exhaustion. He was so tired he didn’t even want to take the effort to open his eyes. He felt a dull ache throughout his entire body, his arms and legs like jelly, unresponsive. His abdominal muscles felt even worse, a sharper ache, like they were ripped. He was laying down in a bed and he could tell there was a window opened somewhere by the warm breeze that passed over him and the sound of birds chirping outside. Thomas brought a hand up to his face and tried to rub the exhaustion from his eyes, groaning a bit at the effort it took just to move his arm.
       
        “Oh,” a voice said next to him. “You’re awake.”
       
        Thomas opened his eyes, leaning his head left towards the voice. Lilly sat in a chair, right next to his bed, a book in her lap, the pages blank except for the raised Braille dots. She smiled at Thomas, making him smile in return despite his aches. Lilly closed the book, setting it to the side, lifting one her hands over to Thomas. He took is graciously in his hand, relieved when she gave his hand a squeeze to let him know she was really there.
       
        “How long was I out?”
       
        “It’s still Friday,” she replied, “and it’s now around 9 o’clock. You’ve been asleep for nearly four hours now.”
       
        Thomas looked around the room, which was clearly part of the hospital-ward on campus. The open window looking out towards the hills on the west, the sun beginning to set between them. The golden light that was being cast out reminding him instantly of how Lilly looked before he had been put under. And, when he remembered that, he also remember the pain, the mere memory of it making him grimace.
       
        “I better go tell the Nurse you’re up,” Lilly said, her hand about to slide from Thomas’ when he quickly grabbed onto her fingers, refusing to let go.
       
        With a hint of panic in his voice, Thomas said, “Wait, wait, wait..” Thomas took a moment to calm his breathing which had suddenly grown ragged. “Don’t get the Nurse just yet…”
       
        Lilly sat back down, still holding onto to Thomas’s hand. Using her other hand, she pushed some of her blond hair behind her ear and waited, her face calm, seemingly unbothered by Thomas’s outburst. Thomas took a few more breaths and said, “Sorry, it’s just that… Getting the Nurse here means bad news…”
       
        “Would you rather hear it from me?” Lilly asked. Thomas thought about it for a moment, wondering how much the Nurse had told her, before deciding he’d rather hear it from Lilly. He said in a shaky voice “S-sure…”
       
        “It was the new pills you had been on. The Nurse said that such an intense reaction is rare, but not completely unseen, so he isn’t too surprised. He said you needed to stop taking this new medication, since there‘s really no other way to counter the side-effects without risking any kind of permanent damage to your body.” Lilly paused, giving Thomas’s hand another squeeze. “He’s already sent someone to your room to take however back however much left of your prescription you had. For now, he’s putting you back on Antihi-…” Lilly struggled with the word. “Antihas-… Antihisa…”
       
        “Antihistamine Diphenhydramine,” Thomas said with a sigh, already familiar with the drug and it’s lack of results. They had worked well at first, years ago, but over time the effectiveness decreased sharply. Now they barely worked at all, just barely giving him enough respite to justify taking them.
       
        “Yes,” Lilly said, nodding, “That’s it. He said he already has a bottle ready for you and he’ll bring it later tonight. He said they want you to stay overnight, to make sure there aren’t anymore attacks. As long as you never take that drug again, you should be fine.”
 
        Thomas said nothing for a while. He laid there, soaking in Lilly’s words, enjoying the feeling of Lilly’s hand in his, the warmth there seemingly the only warmth in the room. The sun continued it’s downward motion through the hills, now almost touching the ground. Tears began to sting Thomas’s eyes again, but he held them back, refusing to cry in front of Lilly a second time today. As he rubbed his eyes with his free hand he couldn’t help say, [Damn it…]
       
        Lilly seemed a bit taken aback. Reverting to English as well she asked, [Thomas, what is it?]
 
        Thomas thought about not telling Lilly anything, not wanting to admit any kind of weakness. Then, with a bitter chuckle, he realized that after today, Lilly already knew how weak Thomas was. Taking a deep breath, he began with, [It’s over for me…]
       
        [What’s over?] Lilly asked.
       
        [This drug was my one chance. And now it’s gone.]
       
        [Thomas,] Lilly said in a disbelieving voice, [I doubt this drug was your only chance for-]
       
        [Lilly, you don’t get it,] Thomas said, [You don’t understand how long I’ve been waiting for something that worked. I’m not asking for a cure, I gave up on that years ago, but these pills, Lilly… These meds were giving me hours of sleep. This morning, I woke up refreshed. I woke up and I actually didn’t feel like throwing myself in front of a train, like most mornings... Lilly, you don’t understand, for people like me, the chances are we’ll only ever have one opportunity to truly reach any kind of normalcy and this was it. And now, to find out that the only drug in years that has had any significant effect on me is now unusable thanks to side-effects…]
 
        [Thomas-] Lilly began, but Thomas interrupted her, his voice growing louder.
       
        [No, Lilly, you don’t get it, it’s over. Do you know how low the chances of me finding a successful medication were in the first place? And, now that this one is useless to me, the chances of me finding another one, a different one... They’re basically zero! Lilly, It’s over! I might as well just give up now! I’m never again going to get sleep like I’ve had these past-]
       
        Lilly stood up quickly, interrupting Thomas’ yelling as she leaned forward and over him. She had let go of Thomas’s hand and now had her hands on the bed on either side of Thomas head, as if she wanted to trap him there. The violence of her actions shocked Thomas, who had never before seen Lilly move so quickly. The expression on her face though surprised Thomas the most. She looked angry. Her brow was furrowed and she had a frown on her face, a frown he had never before seen on Lilly lips.
 
        [Thomas], Lilly began, [That’s enough. You’re going to listen to me now.]
       
        [Lilly-]
       
        [No!] Lilly snapped, her voice hitting a tone of anger that quite honestly frightened Thomas. [You’ve had your turn! Now it’s mine.] Lilly took a moment to brush a loose strand of hair behind her ear again and to take a deep breath. When she spoke again, her voice was calmer, returning to the regular tone Lilly normally kept. [Thomas, I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but I’ll say it again. Welcome to Yamaku.]
 
        [...What?] Thomas asked in a small voice.
 
        [If you want me to be honest,] Lilly said, [I’ll have you know that it would be easier to find a kid here who does know how you feel than to find one who does not. Thomas, there are countless people here who are, as you said, “people like you”.  There are countless people here who know the despair of having a chance of normalcy within their grasp only to have it taken away. Thomas, they all faced the same decision you do right now, to either give up or continue fighting, continue hoping, to continue trying. And I can tell you now, I don’t know a single person here who just gave up.]
       
        Lilly paused, as if expecting Thomas to respond. When he didn’t, she said again, [Thomas, welcome to Yamaku. We keep trying here, no matter how bad things get.] Lilly leaned back and away from Thomas, taking her seat in the chair again. Still with the frown on her face, she lifted her hand up to Thomas. It took him a moment before he realized she wanted him to take it, which he did. Her grip was gentle, but solid, refusing to let go. [We help each other out here, no matter how bad things get. Yes, you’re going to have to go back to sleepless nights and exhausted days, but you don’t have to go back to them alone. You have friends here, you have parents who love you, you have teachers who care about you, and you have a nursing staff here that is trying their heart out everyday to find everyone that “one chance” we all so desperately want.]
       
        Lilly squeezed Thomas’s hand and said, her voice desperately soft, [And you’ll always have Hanako and I there, no matter how bad things ever get…]
       
        Thomas stared at Lilly, tears gathering in his eyes again. The sun had finally set, the light in the room growing darker by the moment. Yet still, when Thomas looked at Lilly, she seemed to glow, every facet of her beauty as clear as day.
       
        [Lilly… Could you do me a favor?]
       
        Lilly cocked her head the side, her expression no longer of anger, but of curiosity. [What might it be, Thomas?]
       
        [Could you…] Thomas stopped, wondering how appropriate his request was. Taking a leap of faith, he continued, [Could you sing me that song one more time? The one you did earlier today?]
       
        Lilly smiled at Thomas, making him smile back in return. [Did you like it?]
       
        [I really did.] Thomas said, [I loved it.]
       
        [I’m glad. My Mother use to sing it to me whenever I cried as a little girl and I thought it might work with you as well...] Lilly paused, then frowned. [That sound terribly condescending, didn't it? I didn't mean to say that today you were-]
       
        [No, no, Lilly, it’s fine. It helped. It really did help me.]
       
        Lilly nodded, the smile returning to her lips. Taking a deep breath. she sat up straighter in her chair, her head held high, and began to sing.
       
        [By yon bonnie banks, an’ by yon bonnie braes, where the sun shines bright on Loch Lomon’... For me an’ my true love shall ne’er meet again, On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomon’…]