Title:           The Adventures of Sing Song, the Tone Deaf Pony
Author:          anon-enjoy
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/0m5Shdan
First Edit:      Friday 8th of May 2015 11:08:17 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Monday 25th of May 2015 05:44:21 PM CDT

>Be Sing Song
>A young colt still yet to get his cutiemark.
>You wake to the usual bullshit.
>Pink horse is outside getting all the ponies in town riled up into a big musical number.
>You just wanna get to school on time, and don't have time for her shenanigans.
>Especially considering your situation.
>As you open your door, you see her song come to a climax and...
>Somehow (as if by magic) a spotlight appears on you.
>The expectant eyes of Pinkie and the whole town are upon you.
>They want you to sing.
>Here goes nothin, you think.
Come on and smile...
>Your voice creaks out with a sound not unlike that of two alley cats fighting.
>Pinkie stands there mouth agape.
>So taken aback that her musical number could be ended by your terrible singing.
>The thing is in a magical land of technicolor ponies who's favorite past time is bursting into song, you may be the only pony in all of Equestria that has a voice like a lawnmower running over a flip-flop.
>And your parents had the nerve to name you Sing Song, o the irony.
>You continue past the frozen Ponk (eye now twitching from being unable to process what happened).
>Taking your usual route to school you wonder what fresh hell may await after you had such a glorious start to the day.
>Thankfully you see a familiar face on the playground.
What's up Silver?
>Silver Spoon waves over to you.
>"Hi Singsy" she chimes out melodically.
>O how she loved to tease you.
Please no more singing today.
>"Ruined another one of Pinkie's songs this morning?"
Shoulda seen the look on her face.
>Silver spoon giggles.
>Meanwhile Diamond Tiara trots ups behind Spoony and opens her big pink yap.
>"Ugh Silver Spoon, what are you doing talking to this blank flank? Heard your big solo today Sing Song. I've heard diamond dogs with better voices."
>Little bitch
>"Good one DT. Bump bump sugar lump rump"
>Funny how Silver becomes a total jerk when Diamond Tiara's around.
>"Let's go Silver Spoon. We haven't made fun of the cutiemark cru-lamers yet."
>With that Diamond Tiara's o so wonderful visit ends with her running off to torment the CMC as the school bell rings.
Why do you put up with her?
>"We have a history, sorry she's so difficult."
>The fact that her apology is actually sincere stings all the more.
>You and Spoony make your way towards the class room.
Yeah but you don't have to be.
>"I'm all she's got... She doesn't have any other friends."
>As evil as Diamond Tiara is at least deep down Silver Spoon is a good pony.
>All the little ponies fill into their seats, whilst Cherilee takes her place at the front of the classroom.
>"All right class settle down now...."
>Tuning out Cherilee you whisper to your friend Featherweight in the seat next to you.
So it happened again. I swear it's like Pinkie is out to get me.
>"Come on Sing it can't be that bad..."
Trust me it is. I don't know why she does it to herself. It's not like one day I'm going to magically sing better during one of her songs.
>"Are you saying you don't believe in magic? Sing Song...That's blasphemy."
Then call me a heretic.
>"It could happen. Ya never know."
>Always the optimism with Feather.
>"Anyway how's it goin between you and you know who?
>Feather motions to Silver spoon a few desks over currently picking up her glasses that fell during a paper airplane barrage from the CMC.
>Whilst she bends over you can't help but glance at her plot.
>Quickly you turn away before she notices you oogling.
>Not quick enough she catches your gaze and to Feather's amusement you are left there awkwardly blushing.
>"You got it bad dude."
Shut up, besides I don't think she's into me in that way.
>"Like I said man ya never know."
Your optimism sickens me to my core and I'm saying this as your frie..
>"Sing Song, Featherweight, pay attention this is an incredibly important lesson."
Yes Miss Cherilee.
>Class drags on as slow as usual and when the bell rings you can't wait to get out.
>Before you have time to leave Silver Spoon comes over to the two of you.
>"Hey. Wanna do me a favor?"
>What could she want? You think as you blankly look over to you're shrugging best friend.
Um sure I guess.
>"I want to go into the Everfree forest to visit the zebra who lives there but..."
You don't want to go alone?
>"Exactly" She squeaks excitedly
Why can't the spoiled brat go with you?
>"Diamond's doing some errands with her dad. Pwease Singsy. It's too scary and I...I don't wanna go alone."
>The look she gives you is coated with enough cute, sugar, rainbow sprinkles to make ponies feet fall off from diabetus.
>How could you say no to a look like that?
>Turns out you couldn't.
Sure, why not?
>"It's a date then. Meet me by the edge of the forest at 5 o clock."
Ok.
>With another squeak and a blush she goes off in the other direction.
>"Dude you're so in. Told ya so."
>Damn Featherweight and his optimism.
>4:45 comes around and you take the long route because you can hear in the distance Pinkie singing some new welcome to Ponyville song.
>As you make your way to the edge of the Everfree, you can see Silver Spoon waiting for you.
>She waves you over.
Yo
>"I'm so glad you decided to come."
Yeah I said I would.
>The two of you enter the forest cautiously.
>Silver looks kinda scared so you give her a nudge and a look of confidence.
>She returns your look with a warm smile and begins to proceed.
>The path is dark and winding but you trot alongside her at a brisk pace.
You know where you're going, right?
>"Of course I've gone here a couple times before."
>She seems confident so you let her lead the way.
>Besides with her up front the view gets a lot better.
>O teenage hormones. Gotta love em.
So why did you wanna come out this way?
>"I'm on an errand for my parents. They do "business" sometimes with Zecora."
And they send you to make pick ups?
>"Uh huh. I really don't mind. Besides it's a lot better with you here."
>As much as you'd hate to admit it (especially to Featherweight) she did seem into you.
>Maybe today isn't so bad.
>As if on cue you trip over a root and knock you and Silver down the current hill you were traversing.
>Flying end over end you both tumble till you collide with a tree at the bottom of the hill.
>Opening your eyes you try to get your bearings only to realize Silver Spoon is on top of you.
>And not in a good way.
>In fact it was kind of painful.
>She gets off of you and begins to brush herself off.
Sorry bout that.
>"It's ok."
>She was most certainly putting up a front for she looked rather disheveled.
>Her glasses were askew and her pearl necklace was completely ruined.
>"On the bright side we're here."
>You knock on the door and who you assume to be Zecora answers.
>"Who knocks upon my tree? Ah it's Silver Spoon I see."
>Hmmm rhymes...
>Weird
>You are guided into a room that looks like it belongs on Neigh-gobah.
>You are half expecting a little, green, pointy eared pony to come out when Silvy speaks up.
>"Hi Zecora just picking up those herbs for my parents."
>She hands her a note and a small satchel of bits.
>Reading the note the Zebra begins to look around the shelves of the tree house.
>"Oh no my little pony it seems I am out. But I can go get more so wait here do not pout."
>With that the zebra leaves the two of you to wait by yourselves.
>Curiosity overtakes you and you begin to take a a gander at the strange items on the shelf.
Powdered unicorn horn, wormwood, lacewing fly, bezoars, mandrake leaf. I don't even know what half of these are.
>Your meandering is interrupted by Spoon-butt.
>"Hey look at this! Note leaf."
What about it?
"It'll totally fix your problem."
And what problem is that?
>"Listen. If one's voice is a little rough, a dash will bring it up to stuff. And if you voice is one that bores you, a dash'll make them all adore you."
>You could sort of tell what she was implying.
>"You can use this to be able to sing better."
I dunno...
>"Come on it says it'll help. Don't you want to be able to sing?"
>And there's the look again.
>The look you couldn't say no to. Still cute despite her messy state.
>It's not that you didn't want to be able to sing well you were just annoyed when Pinkie kept trying to get you to sing.
>Well Featherweight was right about Silver Spoon, and he did say it could magically happen.
Sure why not?
>Looking triumphant she hands you the plant and you choke the bitter thing down.
>"So do you feel anything?"
Not really.
>"Try singing!"
OK here goes nothing.
>You open your mouth and when you start to sing...
LAaaAAa Laaa LAAaaaAAAaaa.
>The sounds that emanate from your throat are...
>Atrocious
>Flip flops, tennis shoes, horse shoes, hay it sounded like a lawnmower shredding a whole array of footwear.
>Silver Spoon removes her hooves from her ears and stares at you in shock.
>"That was awful Singsy."
>Least she was honest.
Sorry you had to go through that.
>"It's ok. too bad it didn't work. Must have been a dud."
>The door at the front swings open and Zecora returns through it.
>"Hello again little ones, while I was gone did you have fun?"
Sure...
>The rhymes take a bit of getting used to.
>"Here you are the herbs you require. I hope they are what you desire."
>"Yeah I'm all set. Thanks Zecora."
>You each say your goodbyes to the zebra and have an uneventful walk back to Ponnyville.
>"Well this is my stop. I had a really like really fun time."
Me too
>Don't know how she could of had a good time we really only ran an errand.
>"Bye" With that she plants a quick kiss on your cheek and goes inside.
>Leaving you stunned. Standing dazed on her front porch.
>You saunter back home with a smile as wide as a mile on your face.
>You couldn't wait to tell Feather, he'd be ecstatic.
>Making your way home you sleepily go up to your room and go to bed.
>Eager to tell Feather tomorrow about the awesome day you had.
>And eager to see Silver Spoon again as well.
>After a quiet nights rest you wake up and expect the usual bullshit from Ponk.
>Strangely it's a quiet morning.
>Mom n Dad are already off to work so you check the fridge for a makeshift breakfast.
>Leftover hay sandwiches it is.
>You make your way outside open the door aaaaaaaand...
>Then you hear it.
>An upbeat violin.
>leading up to the first line of some damn song.
Morning in Ponyville shimmers, morning in Ponyville shines n I know for absolute certain that everything is certainly fine.
>Woah where'd those melodic tones come from?
>Naw.
>You couldn't of.
>You can't sing, right?
>Let's test this.
>You look around at the usually happy pony faces.
>Open your mouth and...
Helloooooo everypony How are you today? Isn't it so lovely? It's a lovely day I say.
>Suddenly all the ponies in the vicinity look up and towards you.
>Smiling faces approach at an alarming speed in your general direction.
>"I'm doing fine."
>"I'm doing swell."
>"Can I get you anything?"
>"Are you feeling well?"
>One after another the ponies around town chime into your song.
>Each of them adding another verse.
>The song ends after what can only be described as a montage and you arrive at school.
>Hmm this song thing is kinda fun, you can see why Panka likes it so much.
>You sit down next to Feather.
>Glancing over a few rows you look at where Silver should be and she appears to be absent.
>That's ok though wouldn't want her to hear all the details you'd tell to Feather, especially the part about walking behind her.
Listen here friend, for I have a story.
>"Tell it to me quick"
O I will do not worry.
>You hear the music start up again.
>Wait what?
>Will this happen every time you speak?
>Apparently.
>After a song and dance number (involving the whole class) about the awesome day you had yesterday you settle down into your seat.
>However everyone else just keeps staring at you.
>Like they're in some sorta trance.
>"Sing for us"
>"We love you Sing Song."
>"Sing sing sing sing sing"
>Their monotone chanting starts to get a little creepy.
>The creep factor is raised as they all start to slowly move towards you.
>"sss...ssssing....for...us."
>"sing...for us"
>"SING FOR US"
>"The mass of song crazed fillies (and Miss Cherilee) starts to try and swarm you.
>You run towards the back of the class and out the door.
>Looking to your left you grab a nearby broom and use it to lock the zombie like ponies inside the schoolhouse.
>Your heart is pounding as you run through town.
>You didn't ask for this. Stupid plant.
>The gravity of your situation sets in as you now realize a mob of entranced townsponies can now be heard heading your way.
>"SING SONG SING SONG SING SONG SING SONG"
>Their chanting seemed to be getting closer.
>You rush to the only place you can think where there won't be ponies.
>You break through the treeline of the Everfree.
>Trying desperately to remember your way to get to Zecora's hut.
>The hypnotized ponies, hot on your trail can be heard not far away.
>Seeing the hut you burst through the door with the force of one of Applejack's bucks.
>Closing the door behind you, you find yourself face to face with a very shocked and confused zebra.
Help me please!!!
>"Why at this hour me you surprise, tell me what's wrong. I will hear your cries."
I ate some plant yesterday that made me able to sing and turned ponies into crazy song obsessed zombies. Wait why aren't you a song crazed zombie?
>"I cannot be swayed by you at this time. For I am always speaking in rhyme."
>Huh.
So you're safe?
>"Quickly now no time to waste. For we must barricade and make haste."
>You begin grabbing anything you can to block the windows and doors.
>The chanting of the zombie ponies is dangerously close now.
>"Continue to block the window n door, while I will start to mix a cure."
On it.
>Double checking your blockades you can begin to hear the clawing of hooves against the walls of the hut.
>"We love you Sing Song."
>"Sing for us."
>"sssssiiiiinnnng"
>Powerless you watch as the hinges of the door buckles under the mass of ponies against it.
>Hooves can be seen sprouting through the holes in the windows.
>The barricades can't hold them for very much longer.
HOW'S IT COMING ZECORA?
>She hands you a vile with a strange looking purple potion inside.
>"Drink this down n If I'm not wrong ponies will not crave your song."
>You guzzle the potion and all you can do now is wait.
>Suddenly the barricades give way and the hypno-ponies descend upon you and Zecora.
>"SING SING SING SING SING SING SING"
>As the clawing hooves descend you do the one thing you can think of.
>You dig deep, suck in, open your mouth aaaaaaaaaand...
LLLlllAAaAAAaaaAAAaAaaAAaAAaaAAaA
>It was the most awful noise you've ever heard and by Celestia were you glad to hear it.
>Your sour note rang out and the hypnotized townsponies began one by one to cover their ears.
>Confused they began to look around and murmur question such as "what happened?" and "where am I?" etc...
>In the crowd you can see Silver Spoon make her way towards you.
>"SING SONG!!!"
>She runs towards you and wraps you into a giant hug.
>"I'm so sorry I shoulda never had you eat that dumb plant."
>You break the hug and speak up for everypony to hear.
I'm sorry everypony. I know now that when you try to be something your not only bad things will happen. I hope you can all forgive me.
>Pinkie bounces up from the back shouting "Siiiiiiiing Sooooong, we loooooove yooooouuuu."
>The crowd turns to her startled and frightened.
>"I'm ok I'm just kidding."
>All the townsponies and you laugh
Whole heartily at Pinkie's joke.
>When the laughter ceases Zecora trots over to you and proclaims "I think that we can forgive your lies, for you have found the true prize."
>Good end
>Roll credits.