Title:           Anon X Prince Artemis Parts 1+2
Author:          Anonymous
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/DACszy7A
First Edit:      Thursday 8th of August 2013 11:38:05 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Thursday 8th of August 2013 11:38:05 PM CDT

>You are Anon, an insomniac
>It doesn't do your liver any favors, but you deal with this with booze and over-the-counter meds
>At least, you used to
>A month ago, you were magically transported into Equestria
>You were immediately captured and brought to Canterlot
>Now you live a comfortable, if quite, life in the castle as an "esteemed guest"
>You get the feeling you're more prisoner than guest, but you're well-treated, so no complaints
>Well, except about the insomnia
>No sleep meds to help you, and pony booze is laughably weak
>You keep yourself occupied in the day mostly through conversation, there are plenty of interesting ponies around the castle
>Occasionally you go out to experience Canterlot, but guards always tail you, making it a bit awkward
>All in all, you can normally find something to do
>Nights, however, are unbearable
>No internet, no TV, no ponies to talk with, no extra guards to take you out, no anything
>You can't even read anymore- the pony's faux-Cyrillic writing is completely illegible to you
>Fucking boring
 
>Find yourself walking the halls of the castle for the thousandth time
>It must be around 3am, and you're pretty sure you won't be getting any sleep tonight
>Rumble in your stomach
>Decide to get some pre-breakfast
>You head to the personal kitchen that the castle staff uses and start mixing some pancake batter
>The door opens behind you, and you turn around to look who it is
>Its Prince Artemis
>There's an awkward silence
>"Umm... Greetings, Anon"
"Y-you too"
>You both know who each other are, and you've even passed each other in the halls at night a few times
>His bat-pony guards always made him seem a bit cold and distant though, so you never approached him
>However, he's alone now
>He sits down at the dining table behind you without saying anything else
>You continue to mix the batter, turning around again so as not to stare
 
>It's been about 5 minutes
>You've started to cook the pancakes, and Artemis is still sitting behind you
>Neither of you have said a word
>You turned around once to look at him, he was looking at the back of your head
>He looked away before your eyes met, though
>The awkwardness is killing you, you need to say something
"You want some pancakes?" you mumble, flipping one of them
>"I'm sorry, I did not hear you"
"You want some of these pancakes?" you ask louder, turning around to face him
>"Yes, I will make some"
"No, like, I'm making a bunch. You can have some of mine."
>"Oh, yes. Umm, no. I will make mine. M-my own pancakes. I like them with blueberries"
>You look to your left, where another stove is going unused
"You could use that stove," you say, pointing, "So you don't have to wait for my pancakes"
>"I'm making my own, I'm not waiting on yo-"
"No no, like... uhh, you should make yours now instead of waiting for me to finish"
>"Yes we... I-I should"
>The prince gets up and starts mixing some batter next to you, his face just as pained from the awkwardness as yours
>A minute later he walks to the fridge
>There's the sound of rustling before you hear him announce "There are no blueberries"
>You turn to look at him, then realize that you should say something
"There aren't any blueberries?"
>"No"
>You open your mouth to say something else, but can't think of anything
>You're still looking at Prince Artemis
>Quickly, you turn back around and put the next batch of pancakes on
>Artemis walks back and resumes cooking
>Artemis only makes a few pancakes, so you both finish at about the same time
>You both sit down in silence (on the same side of the table), you both put butter and syrup on in silence, and you both eat in silence
>Artemis finishes first, as he had less pancakes
>He stands up to leave, you open your mouth to say goodbye
"Sorry about the blueberries"
>"... Yes"
>He turns around and walks out the door
>A few seconds later, the door opens again, and he pokes his head back in
>"We should hang out sometime"
"Okay"
>He leaves again
>You finish your pancakes
 
>That morning around 9, you're approached by a gruff looking batpony guard
>He speaks sternly and with an air of aloofness
>"The Prince of Darkness requests your company this night. He shall arrive at your room promptly at 11, after he has attended to his nightly duties."
>You nod your head in acknowledgement
"Yes... ummm, okay"
 
>Between a trip to the local market and a few much-needed naps, the day passes quickly
>It is now 10:55, and you are dressed to the nine's in preparation for your night out with Artemis
>Full tux with a red bow-tie, groomed hair, and a box of chocolates as a thank you for the prince
>You had picked up the candy at the market- chocolate-covered grass isn't your thing, but you figure Artemis will like it
>Soon, there's a knock at your door
>You head over excitedly, but are stopped in your tracks by what you see in the mirror next to your suite's exit
>Your reflection- the outfit, the hair, the chocolates
>It looks like you think this is a date
>... Artemis is going to think you think this is a DATE
"Uh... h-hold on o-one second please!"
>You toss the chocolates onto the counter and run back into your bedroom
>30 seconds later, and you've managed to get into more casual dress and mess your hair up a little
>You dart over to the door and swing it open
"S-sorry about the wait, I-"
>Prince Artemis is standing outside, wearing a tuxedo
>In his out-stretched hoof, a box of chocolate-covered grass
>It takes you a few seconds to realize it’s a gift for you
>You grab it with both hands and, unsure of what to do with it, just hold it next to your chest
>Artemis still hasn't said anything
>You notice his eyes are darting back and forth between your clothing and the hoof he's using to paw at the ground
>He must have noticed that he's dressed up a lot more than you
>He probably thinks you think he thinks this is a date
>... Wait, is it a date?
>You turn around to hide a blush
"Umm... Thank you for the chocolate! J-just let me put it down real fast"
>You walk over to the counter and place it on top of the other box of chocolates
>... Hopefully Artemis didn't notice that
>Turning back around, you see the prince struggling to pull the tux's undershirt over his head
>You just kind of stand there, watching him
>He finally gets it off and tosses it to the side
>Your eyes meet
>...
>"THE CLOTHES WERE CAUSING US TO ITCH! WE HAVE DECIDED TO CHANGE!"
 
>The both of you are now in Artemis's private tower
>You're seated at a table in a small, dark hall
>There are only a few torches on the wall, and the ceiling is obscured in shadow
>Your table, however, is decorated with a several candles that shine light onto the meal that Artemis had prepared for the two of you
>It's sandwiches
>At first, this had seemed a little odd, but once you had realized yours was a BLT, you had almost cried tears of happiness
>The food was heavenly, but the silence, heavy
>Soon, Artemis speaks up
>"So, ah... I'm s-sorry about yelling earlier. I'm still trying to work on... that"
>You wave a dismissive hand, still in a good mood from the BLT
"Don't worry about it. It wasn't a problem"
>You flash a smile
>Artemis blushes and looks down
>"We a-... I am also sorry about arriving before you were ready. I didn't mean to encroach while you were nak-"
>He chokes on the word and starts coughing
>"I-I mean whILE YOU WERE... w-while you were g-getting ready"
>Now he's playing with his hooves, refusing to look at you
>It looks like he might start hyperventilating soon
>Maybe it’s just the bacon talking, but you decide that you must save this night from absolute spaghetti
>Small-talk mode: activate
"So, uh, how do you normally spend your nights? Once you finish with official business?"
>Prince Artemis looks up at you, his eyes thanking you for the lifeline
>"Normally I, umm... Well, I guess there's a lot of things. I visit a lot of museums and art exhibits after they close"
"Wow, that sounds great."
>"Yes, when nopony else is there, the exhibits gain a little... something extra"
>He waves his hoof in a little circle to accentuate the last phrase
>"I also enjoy visiting a bar or two on occasion. Not as often, though- everypony just tends to shy away, but I'm sure you've gotten a little of the same"
"Well, not really. Everybody in the castle knows me now, and I can't ever go out at night"
>"Why not?"
"I have to take guards whenever I go out. There aren't enough to take me out at nights, and they keep ponies away from me during the days"
>The prince perks up a little
>"Well... I could take you out sometime... I-If you wanted to that is"
>You're practically beaming now
"Really? You mean that?"
>Artemis nods before turning the question around on you
>"Well, what do you do all night then? I know you don't sleep"
"Well, I do sleep, just not that often. Not as often as I'd like to, at least. Nights are usually a whole lot of nothing for me"
>"Do you like reading?"
"Love it"
>"Well, the castle library's a good way to pass the time"
"I wish. I don't know the pony alphabet"
>"Well, I could help find you a tutor, if you have the time. Or... uhh..."
"Or what?"
>"Well... I could... read to you"
>You don't answer immediately, and Artemis cuts back in nervously
>"N-nevermind. That was a dumb idea"
"No, it wasn't. That sounds like a lot of fun"
>There's a pause in the conversation, but the silence is a lot more comfortable this time around
>Eventually, you speak again
"So, art and books. Anything else you spend time on?"
>"Well, I do have this garden I tend to"
 
>Artemis has spent the last 15 minutes walking you around his garden
>Its located on top of the ballroom, far above prying eyes
>Throughout his tour, he's listed off every plant you pass by, most of which are night-bloomers
>You've made the occasional comment, but, for the most part, have been content to let the prince do most of the talking
>Now the both of you are sitting next to each other in a patch of grass, with Artemis listing off a few of the flowers around you
>"... and that's a Dragontail over there. They only bloom once a year, but, when they do, each petal's a different color"
>You lean back into the grass
"It’s so beautiful"
>You feel Prince Artemis adjust himself to lie down next to you
>"Hm?"
"Well, just everything, you know. The garden, the night"
>You gesture up to the crisp, cloudless night sky
"And, uh... Just... Just everything's great"
>"Thanks"
>Artemis starts to nuzzle your neck
>... and then instantly freezes up
>"W-wait, I'm s-sorry. I didn't realize what I was d-doing there"
>From the sound of his breath, he's close to hyperventilating again
>You roll over on your side to face him
>He won't meet your eyes- he looks close to panic
>You speak softly, almost in a whisper
"Hey, Artemis. It’s kind of cold tonight. Do you think you could lend me a wing?"
>He looks up at you like he doesn't know if you're joking or not
>There's a beat where he just stares, but then he moves to drape his wing over you
>As you wiggle in closer to snuggle up against the prince, you see him fighting to keep back a giant smile
>You bury your head into his neck, returning his earlier nuzzle
"Thanks, Prince Artemis"
>"Call me Arty"
 
>Groggily, you come to
>You're not in the field anymore... those are definitely blankets over you
>You can vaguely remember drifting off under the prince's wing and being carried... somewhere, before a warm weight settled next to you
>A warm weight that's still there
>Rolling over, you're greeted by the sight of Prince Artemis sleeping next to you
>And then you're promptly blinded by the sun streaking in through the windows behind the prince
>You decide its best not to wake him and roll out of bed
>Damn, you must have slept for at least 8 hours- that's the best night's rest you've had since arriving in Equestria
>Rubbing your eyes, you plod over to the doorway leading out of the bedchamber
>You push the doors open, step out, and freeze as you realize two batpony guards are staring you down
"I d-didn't have sex with him. T-the prince and I. We didn't... w-we didn't have s-sex"
>They don't change their expressions
"H-heh. Just, ummm... just letting you guys know"
>Still no response from them
>You decide the best course of action is to run like hell