"Yet Another Anon Dad Story (Intro)"
By lulzies (https://pastebin.com/u/lulzies)

URL: https://pastebin.com/zbmER1Ha
Created on: Thursday 2nd of August 2012 06:32:54 PM CDT
Retrieved on: Saturday 31 of October 2020 09:11:38 AM UTC


>”Like the Spanish Inquisition?”
>You can’t help but to smile and ruffle her mane.
“Sure Cel, sure.”
>She giggles at your frolic on her unnatural mane, shaking her head little.
“Now, where was I?”
>You rub your chin, and look to the filly.
>She has her mouth slightly open in excitement, eyes gleaming by the lamplight.
>You snap your fingers right by your head.
“Ah! Yes. Now, as I was saying-“
>You lean closer to the white filly, and narrate;
“The beginning.”

>It was dark.
>So very dark.
>Trees blocked out whatever remained of the shattered moon, looming its wretched reach to every inch of the land.
>Animals are nowhere to be seen, filling this land with more dread.
>But even in this dead land, life struggles on.
>Twenty six of life, actually.

>Heavy panting filled the cold air in front of her, creating and quickly dissipating mist.
>Her equally weighted hoofsteps rang through the forest, calling to her to-be captors.
>And as they heeded the call and drew near-
>She did the only thing left to do.
>Run.
>Slaps of cool mud splashed across the barren land, as her legs accelerated.
>She soon heard shouts and alarm behind, getting louder by the minute.
>They were just too fast.
>Her white coat was stained with the grime and dust, its regal bearing faded away long ago.
>The crimson mane waved unsteadily- like the trails of blood running down her face.
>She bit her lip, and soldiered on.
>She could not let them to her package.
>Life, a very small life.
>It stirred gently in her grasp, dreaming peacefully; unaware of what is going on.
>She was too innocent…
>She was to lead her people to the future.
>Her name was-

“Celestia!”
>You shout at the little filly.
>”What?” She asks, raising her front hooves.
“Don’t you ‘what’ me, I saw that.”
>You walk over, and help Luna up.
>The foal whined a little, before retreating into her blanket-cocoon.
>You frown at Celestia, glaring at her handiwork.
>Hoof-work?
>Celestia smiles innocently, before skipping away.
>The little blue foal started to cry, and that was the moment you knew what you were going to do today.
>Get bubblegum out of Luna’s mane.
>You ignore Celestia’s need for Epic Adventure Time, her fault she cut you off.
>Where did you even get gum?
>You finally resort to cutting some of Luna’s mane off, after the oil plan didn’t work.
>Throughout, Luna whimpered and cried.
>Just another day.
>How did you even get in this mess?

>You know that sound.
>That awful, god-hating sound.
>BEEP BEEP
>The god forsaken alarm.
>BEEP BEEP ANUN BEEP
>You groan audibly, before reaching out to the abyss.
>You wave your hand wildly, trying to find the button.
>You feel the cold surface, and you punch down on it.
>It goes silent.
>Good, maybe you can-
>BEEP BEEP
>You rise, sitting up on your bed.
>You phone is ringing on the table.
>It keeps vibrating onto the wooden desk, causing this steady ring.
>It is bothering you.
>Since you’re up anyway, you stroll over to the phone and check.
>A text.
>’Happy Birthday, Anon! –SisAnon’
>’Make it a good twenty one! –MomAnon’
>’Happy Vagina Emergence Day. –AnonBro’
>Oh, that’s right.
>Your 21st birthday.
>How could you forget?
>You frankly could not give a shit.
>Same ol’ day, just like the rest of the 364 and a quarter of a day.
>You shuffle to your fridge and fish out the half empty carton of milk.
>You lazily trail a finger over the opening of the white package, feeling the moist entrance.
>You slide it in, and flip it out.
>And then you take a deep drink, gulping down most of its contents.
>You drop the carton on the kitchen counter, and walk over to your computer.
>What, you expected yourself to do anything productive?
>Nah.
>You boot up your computer, and turn to look outside of the window while it loaded.
>A stead, low hum filled the room.
>You drum your finger on the keyboard impatiently.
>Then you hear another tune from your room.
>Your phone again.
>You wonder who would call you, considering all wishes were had the night before.
>Guessing it is another of your friends; you half-heartedly reach out and hold it up.
>You open it without hesitation, clicking away.
>Sent from: Unknown?
>’Happy Birthday, Anonymous! I have a surprise for you.’
>A surprise?
>You glance at the clock once, taking note of the time.
>The day is still young, you got lots of time.
>Which means more time to kill online.
>You had a job, small time- no big draw on your life.
>You asked around, doing odd jobs and part-time.
>Hopefully, AnonBro can find you the clerk job.
>Best bro. Hands down.
>Maybe you could-
>A knock on the door stops your trail of thought.
>A single knock, and then two.
>And then, came a flurry of knocks on the door.
“Coming!” You call to the knocker.
>The door-beating persists.
>You rub the back of your head, and grab the doorknob.
>You pull it open immediately, only to be met with a few jabs at your face.
>You recoil in reflex, and cover you face, effectively cutting off your view.
>The hits stop, and you unconsciously reach out to your apparent attacker.
>Something hard lands on the top of your palm, and rolls off.
>You open your eyes, and look outside.
>Nothing.
>Bob the neighbor waves at you from across the street.
>You wave back.
>You rub your face.
>What was that?
>Wait, something clattered on your palm before falling down.
>You look down.
>Is that a… cup?
>You crouch over the golden item, blinking brilliantly by the sun.
>You pick it up, and raise it to your eye level.
>It’s too short to be a cup…
>Some embroidery rose on one side of this… thing.
>If you weren’t so skeptical, you’d say it was some sort of a shoe.
>A shoe not for humans, obvious-
>Something flies to your chest, and you are knocked to the floor.
>The wind is forced out of you, as your chest feels a pressure on your chest.
>”You found my shoe!” A voice rings out.
>You shake your head and look up.
>That sounded like a girl.
>But what is a-
>What.
>It quickly jumps off your chest, and prance to your door steps.
>She- it- waits till you are up, looking to you with those deep, large magenta eyes.
>You notice her multicolored ‘hair’, bearing several lines of pastel colors.
>It had white coat.
>You saw her little stubby legs, one of them missing the shoe.
>The very ‘shoe’ you held earlier.
>You spotted a horn sticking out of her hair, and tiny wings on its side.
>Her snout reminded you of an animal…
“Are you a horse?”
>”What?!” Her voice cracks.
>Oh god, she sounds just like Blossom.
>”I’m not a dirty horse!” She puffs her cheeks.
>It was cute, actually.
“Then what are you?”
>”I’m glad you asked!” She jumped once, gliding in the air.
>”I’m a pony!”
>Uh huh.
“Uh… huh.”
>”A unicorn Pegasus, actually!” She shouts.
>She lands back on the floor, and sits.
>She spreads her back legs, sliding the flank down to the ground.
>She even has the tail that is made out of gay.
>Her forelegs support the weight up.
>She shakes her head a little, giving her mane a ruffle.
>Well, it is a pony, right?
>So, mane.
>A small note sticks out of it, reading, ‘HAPPY B-DAY’
>Suddenly, her small, white horn glows in a golden aura, and a small ribbon appears on her head.
>You look down in shock, unable to make words.
>She.
>Just.
>Conjured.
>A Ribbon.
>Out of nothing.
>JES-
>”HI DADDY!”
>She shrieks in laughter once, and jumps again to your chest, knocking you down to the floor.
>You lift your body up with your elbow.
“D-D-DADDY?!”
>She giggles.
>”Yeah! SURPRISE!”
>…
>Fuck.
>You are daddy now, Anonymous.
>And you didn’t even get to have sex first.
>NO.
>OH GOD WHAT?