"Episode 24: The Long Con"
By SitcomAnon (https://pastebin.com/u/SitcomAnon)

URL: https://pastebin.com/b2MppyVy
Created on: Tuesday 22nd of September 2015 03:04:00 PM CDT
Retrieved on: Sunday 25 of October 2020 11:41:17 AM UTC


Episode 24: The Long Con

(Act I: We open on the interior of Norman and Brad’s apartment. We see Norman on the couch facing the TV. He seems incredibly bored. Sitting next to him is a new character, his cousin Chloe Commons. She is a little younger than Norman and has light purple skin with brown hair. She stares at the screen enthralled.)
Norman: Chloe?
Chloe: Yes Oniichan? 
Norman: Okay, first: I am not your oniichan, I am your cousin. 
Chloe: I fail to comprehend your reality and replace it with my own. (Laughter)
Norman: Fair enough. Second: Are you noticing a pattern to the anime you have been making me watch?
Chloe: Whatever could you mean, oniichan?
Norman: Well, let’s go over everything you’ve made me watch so far: Oreimo, Yosuga no Sora, Myself, Yourself, and something called, and I preface this by saying I may butcher this title: Onii-chan Dakedo Ai Sae Areba Kankeinai yo ne.
Chloe: Not bad...you’re accent could use a little work though. 
Norman: Thank you (Laughter as he realizes what he said) No!  I mean, haven’t you noticed anything about these shows?
Chloe: Hmm….Nope, I’ve got nothing.
Norman: They are all about incest.
(Enter Brad sliding through the door into the living room)
Brad: More like wincest! (Laughter and applause at his intro).
Norman: You’re not helping matters here.
Chloe: I’m not seeing it, oniichan.
Norman: Not seeing it? Yosuga no Sora basically hits you over the head with it...explicitly and repeatedly.
Brad: That the one where the dude rails his sister? (Laughter)
Norman: To put it bluntly, yes.
Brad: You shouldn’t be watching that, Chloe...it’s a bad influence for someone your age.
Norman: Listen to Brad, Chloe. When he is saying something is too overtly sexual, you know it’s an issue. (Laughter)
Chloe: B...but Brad-senpai, I’m eighteen.
(Cut to the inside of Brad’s mind: V/O of Chloe: I’m eighteen echoing. There is a light and ding noise as the word “Legal” appears.) (Laughter)
Brad:(Smiling)  Well, Norm looks like he is getting bored. We should go to my room and watch anime and chill. 
Chloe: I guess we could.
Norman: NO! (Laughter) I mean...no, I’d love to watch more anime with you.
Chloe: (Hugging Norman) Really? Thanks oniichan!
Norman: (Cringing) Yeah...you’re welcome. 
Chloe: (Getting an idea) Hey oniichan, do you wanna go to a convention with me this Saturday.
Norman: (Sarcastically) Aw...Chloe, I wish I could but I already promised Rarity that we would be going out on a date that day.
(Norman’s cell phone rings)
Norman: Oh my…(Checks the id) Speak of the lovely almost demon. (Laughter)
Brad: Technically she was a living nightmare, my ex was the demon. 
Chloe: What?
Norman and Brad: We’ll tell you when you’re older. (Laughter)
Norman: (Answering the phone) Hello Ary..ty. (A beat) Yes, I’m doing well. (beat) Well of course I remember our date Saturday. I’m looking forward to it after all. (Beat, his face falls) Oh...oh you have to cancel. (beat) No, it’s alright. (Beat) You want to do brunch Sunday instead? (beat) That sounds great! (beat) I love you, too. (Audience: Aww) No, you hang up. (beat w/ audience laughter) No, you first. 
(Brad grabs the phone)
Brad: Bye Rarity. (Hangs up, laughter)
Norman: We’re going out Sunday…(Realization and face falling) Oh dear.
(He turns to an expectant Chloe smiling back at him...sighs)
Norman: (Defeated) Guess we’re going to that convention.
Chloe: (Hugging him) Oniichan! (Laughter)
(Title card: Five Minutes Earlier)
(Interior of Rarity’s apartment. She and Coco are working on dresses)
Coco: Rarity Senpai?
Rarity: Yes, Coco?
Coco: Cou...could I possibly have Saturday off?
Rarity: Absolutely darling.
Coco: Really?
Rarity: Sure. Norman and I are going on a date that night so having the day off to get ready would probably be a good idea.
Coco: Thank you, Rarity Senpai!
Rarity: You’re welcome, dear. Now, do tell, where are you off too? Could it be a date?
Coco: Dddddd-daito?! (Laughter)
Rarity: Oh I knew it! What did I tell you! Stick with me and you wouldn’t be single long. So, who’s the lucky boy?
Coco: Nnnnnnn….no. It’s...it’s not a date. P...promise you won’t laugh.
Rarity: Coco, darling, I would never laugh at you. You know what I always say, right?
Coco: That I should always be myself and true friends will never think differently of you when you do so.
Rarity: Exactly.
Coco: Well, to be honest I am going to an anime convention in town. I, I was thinking about cosplaying.
Rarity: Coco…
Coco: (Defensively) I told you it was embarrassing.
Rarity: Darling, that’s wonderful.
Coco: It is?
Rarity: Absolutely! It lets you practice your craft and combine it with something you enjoy.
Coco: You’re right. Plus I get to go to the panel about making the outfits from “My Little Seamstress Can’t Be This Cute”.
Rarity: (Freezing in place) What was that last part dear?
Coco: There’s a whole panel on making the outfits from “My Little Seamstress Can’t Be This Cute”.
Rarity: (Excitedly) There’s a panel for Mai ritoru ohariko wa, kono kawai koto ga dekimasen. (Laughter)
Coco: Y...yes.
Rarity: Coco, may I show you something.
Coco: Sure Senpai.
(Cut to a black screen. The scene opens with the black sliding left to right like a door. We see Coco and Rarity staring in)
Coco: Senpai, this is amazing.
Rarity: What can I say, I’m a fan.
(we cut to behind the girls. We can see wall scrolls, figures, dvd’s, and games from the anime all hidden in the closet) (Laughter)
Rarity: Are there still tickets available for the con.
Coco: Senpai?
Rarity: (Turning to Coco) Tickets, darling. Are there any?
Coco: Yes.
Rarity: Let me just make a phone call. I prefer the Sunday Brunch anyways. 
(Laughter to end act)





(Act II: We open with Norman, Brad and Chloe riding to the con in the Ferarity Equestarosa. Norman is stuck cosplayng as Kyon, Chloe as Haruhi. and Brad as Koizumi)
Chloe: Your car is kind of weak Oniichan.
Norman: (Annoyed) Whatever do you mean, dear cousin.
Chloe: Well, you never take it drifting. Couldn’t you at least have gotten a Toyota AE86 Trueno? That car is the best.
Norman: Okay, first things first, you don’t like that car. You like a cartoon. A Boring Cartoon!!! (Laughter)
Second: This is no simple car, it’s the Ferarity Equestarosa!
(Chloe and Brad both cringe a bit) (Laughter)
Chloe: Isn’t it a Fiero with a body kit?
Norman: That’s about enough of that. I’ll have you know I once blew past and beat a Lamborghini Gallardo with this car on an open highway.
Chloe: Really Oniichan?
Norman: Damn straight I did, Brad was there.
Brad: (Matter of Factly) The Lambo was behind a big rig and going uphill.
Norman: (Angry) It’s the principle that counts. (Laughter)
(Fade out and fade up to Scene 2 on the exterior of the Canterlot Convention Center. Cut to the interior and general scenes of con-goers. We pan through the halls with various cosplays and settle on Rarity and Coco. Coco is dressed as Magical Girl Coco-Chan and Rarity is next to her dressed in a yukata that is white with a purple sash and blue diamonds on it)
Rarity: Coco, Darling, this is absolutely beautiful! It has to be some of your finest work.
Coco: (Beaming) Thank you, Rarity Senpai!
Rarity: And your outfit is so cute as well! Tell me again, where is that character from.
Coco: It’s kind of an underground work right now. (Laughter) This is exactly how Coco-Chan and Miss Charity dressed in the New Year’s Omake back in issue 5. (She notices what she said and begins blushing)
Rarity: (Looking at wares in the vendor’s hall) Sorry dear, I missed that last part. 
Coco: No worries, Senpai. It wasn’t important.
Rarity: Alright dear.  Well, would you look at this. A fan comic of “My Little Seamstress”.
(She picks up a copy.  The cover clearly has the letters “BL” on it)
Rarity: Hmm, you don’t see much focus on the male characters on the show. (Turns page) And the art is so clean, so crisp, so tasteful. (Turns page, Rarity looks at it and freezes) Oh...oh my. (Laughter)
Coco: Senpai?
(Rarity licks her lips and turns another page)
Coco: S...senpai?
Rarity: (Looking up at Flim and Flam behind the table) How much is this?
Flim:  Five Dollars.
Rarity: And are there back issues?
Flam: Three.
Rarity: (Handing over money) Here is Forty Dollars. You are to give me two copies of each. One for display and one or...research purposes. (Laughter)
Coco: R...rarity Senpai?
Rarity: (Clutching the bag with the books close to her chest) Coco dear?
Coco: Yes senpai?
Rarity: We must never speak of this again. (Laughter)
(Fade out and fade up into scene 3. Norman, Brad and Chloe have arrived inside the Con)
Norman: (Genuine amazement) Look at all of these people.
Brad: It’s absolutely packed in here.
(Cut to Chloe effortlessly moving through the crowd)
Norman: How the hell does she do that.
(Norman and Brad are now on one side of the hall, Chloe on the other, between them, people walking by like a raging river)
Chloe: (Waving, seen in the distance over Norman’s Shoulder) Yoohoo! Oniichan! Over here.
Brad: Unbelievable…(Laughter)
(From above we watch as Norman and Brad try to cross over to Chloe. They get close, go sideways, backwards and forwards. From the nearby game room, the theme from Frogger can be heard). (Laughter)
(Norman gets to the end and pops up next to Chloe but he turns and sees Brad get carried off by the crowd)
Brad: (Holding out his hand as he’s carried off) Norm!!!!!
Norman: Brad!!! No!!! 
Chloe: Game over. (Laughter)
Norman: I...I couldn’t save him. Goddamit…
Twilight: Norman is that you?
Norman: Purple!? (Laughter)
Twilight: What are you doing here?
Norman: Rarity cancelled and my cousin, Chloe really wanted to go. What about you?
Twilight: Oh, I came here with a friend of mine. Hold on, let me introduce her.
(Twilight waves. Enter a girl who looks a bit like Twilight. She has red hair with a purple stripe in it pulled upwards in the middle with a pink barrette. She also has red, bushy eyebrows. She wears black rimmed glasses taped in the middle, a dark blue sweater and a black skirt.)
Twilight: Norman, Chloe, I’d like for you to meet my friend, Moondancer.
Moondancer: (Bowing slightly) H...Hello.
Chloe: (Bowing in return) Nice to meet you.
Norman: (Inner Monologue) Moondancer...someone’s parents were hippies. (Laughter) (Aloud) Nice to meet you. Any friend of Purple’s is a friend of mine.
(Moondancer smiles at Norman)
Twilight: I met her at the library one day. It turns out she has the same love for fanfiction that I have!
(As this explanation is occurring, the camera switches between Norman and Moondancer’s faces. Each time zooming in more on Norman’s eyes and Moondancer’s eyebrows)
Moondancer: It’s true. Tell me Norman, do you like fanfiction?
Norman: (Absentmindedly) Eyebrows…(Laughter)
Moondancer: I beg your pardon?
Norman: (Brought back to earth) Oh...uh...I Browse fanfiction occasionally.
Chloe: (Under her breath) Nice save.
Norman:(Likewise) Shut up. (Laughter)
Moondancer: Have you ever thought about writing any?
Norman: I’m afraid I’m not too good at writing.
Moondancer: How can anyone be bad at writing?You literally just think up words and put them on a piece of paper! (She produces a notebook and pencil) Here, watch.
(She starts scribbling on the paper and reading aloud)
Moondancer: Norman was staring at the attractive, yet fleeting girl in front of him with a look of handsome lust running over his chiseled face…
Norman: (Confused) What? (Laughter)
Moondancer: He crept up slowly behind the beautiful and intelligent girl, and ran his fingers through her long flowing hair, curling his fingertips on her yearning hips.
Norman: W...what? (Laughter)
Moondancer: (Becoming flushed and writing faster) Norman ran his strong fingers down her neck and breathed words of desire into her ear. The tension was so high that the dams themselves were aching to be broken.
Norman: (Nervously) T..twilight...what’s she on about?
(Twilight is just staring at Moondancer, mouth agape) 
Norman: Damn it Purple! (Laughter)
Moondancer: “TAKE ME NORMAN!” The girl screamed, plunging her womanhood onto his pleasure rod, thrusting with the passion of a typhoon.
(She looks up from the paper into Norman’s eyes and starts approaching him)
Moondancer: And she rode him until all of his essence became one with hers, they laid in an euphoric glow for hours on end, proclaiming their love for one another,
(She is to him now, holding onto his jacket)
Norman: M...moondancer?
Moondancer: (Whispering in his ear) Based on a true story. (Laughter)
Norman: (Panicking) Well, this has been eye opening. Moondancer, it’s been great to meet you. (He shakes her hand while she stares at it surprised) C’mon Chloe, we need to go to a panel...over there! (He runs away)
Twilight: That story made me feel weird.
Norman: (Yelling offscreen) We need to have a talk later when we get home, Purple. (Laughter)
Chloe: Oniichan, that story gave me weird feelings too. 
Norman: I’ll explain when you’re older! (Laughter)
Moondancer: (Staring at her hand) He held my hand...Twi, your friend is so lewd! (Laughter to end scene)

(Act III opens outside one of the panel rooms as Rarity and Coco exit)
Rarity: I must say, darling, the fact that some many of the dresses can be made from base clothing available from local shops certainly makes cosplay much easier.
Coco: But it’s so much more satisfying to make it from scratch.
Rarity: (Looking at her and Coco’s cosplays) That is certainly true. It’s always good to take pride in one’s work. Especially when that person is so good at making cosplays.
Coco: (Elated) Thank you, senpai!
Rarity: Now, what say we head on over to that panel on School Uniforms through the Ages…(She starts to trail off as she stops walking)
Coco: S..senpai? Are you alright?
(We see Rarity’s POV lock onto Norman. Coco turns and sees him as well)
Coco: Oh…
Rarity: (Panicking) What is Norman doing here?
Coco: (Producing a pair of shears and threateningly holding them) Better question, what is that two timing scoundrel doing with another girl. (Turning back to Rarity) I’ll take care of it, you may want to look away, Senpai. (Laughter)
Rarity: Coco, no! 
Coco: Senpai?
Rarity: That’s his cousin.
Coco: How do you know?
Rarity: He’s shown me family pictures. That must be Chloe. He always complained about how much she was into anime.
Coco: He complains about someone’s love of anime. (Raising the shears again) Let me at him! (Laughter)
Rarity: No! We can’t draw attention to ourselves. He can’t know my secret!
Coco: B...but Senpai?
Rarity: (Ducking and pulling Coco into a panel) No worries Coco. This is a huge convention center. We can still hit panels and avoid him and he’ll never know we were here.
Coco: Senpai?
(Norman and Chloe enter into the same Panel room)
Rarity: (Panicked) Change of plans! (Darting out dragging Coco with her)
(We see numerous scenes of Rarity and Coco moving around the con only to run into Norman and Chloe or have them walk into the same panel. At one point, Rarity and Coco sneak behind Norman and Chloe in two separate cardboard boxes, stopping when the two turn around)
(Laughter)
(The two turn back around and walk away)
Norman: I hope Brad’s okay.
Chloe: Oh, I’m sure he’s fine. He’s in a secure convention space with a bunch of people including industry workers and female cosplayers. What’s the worst that can happen.
Norman: That’s my fear. (Laughter)
(Quick cut to Brad leaving an empty room in the hall)
Brad: Well, that’s one character from “My Little Harem Show can’t be this Generic”. Only six more to go. (Laughter) Bradical!
(Back to Norman who cringes hard) (Laughter)
Chloe: Anyhow, we need to get to the Main Hall in the next hour or so.
Norman: Why?
Chloe: Promise you won’t be mad?
Norman: When you preface it like that, I can’t make any guarantees. (Laughter)
Chloe: I kind of went and entered us into the cosplay contest.
Norman: You did what?!
Chloe: Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Norman: Well, it’s not. I’m not great in front of people.
Chloe: Oh...it’s not that bad. It’s just a costume contest.
Norman: So, it’s just getting up in front of people and showing off.
Chloe: Yeah...something like that.
Norman: I dunno, that’s bringing back some bad memories of the fashion show the girls had me put on back in High School.
Chloe: You mean the one you wrote about in your letter where they figured it would make you look like less of a racist.
Norman: Yep.
Chloe: But the costumes just made you look like more of a racist.
Norman: That’s the one.
Chloe: So that’s why you’re still a racist?
Norman: I am not a racist! I am a melting pot of friendship! (Laughter)
Chloe: I promise you, it will be fun.
Norman: Well, I do admit, this con has been more fun than I thought it would be.
Chloe: C’mon then. (She drags him off)
(Cut to the interior of the main hall of the convention center. It is a huge room with all of the seats filled with people waiting for the cosplay contest to start. Rarity and Coco are sitting in the hall near the back)
Rarity: See Coco, what did I tell you. We can blend right in here and still enjoy the con.
Coco: If you’re so worried about Norman seeing you, why not just leave?
Rarity: Because you’ve been waiting for this con for months. I want you to stay and enjoy it.
Coco: Senpai.
Rarity: Plus, I’ve been truly enjoying it myself, truth be told. Thanks for introducing me to this world Coco. (She hugs her)
Coco: Senpai. (She hugs back) (Awwww)
(The lights dim and the cosplay competition starts)
(Cut to Norman and Chloe)
Chloe: Are you ready?
Norman: As I’ll ever be considering you dragged me into this.
(Enter Brad)
Brad: I didn’t miss the contest, did I?
Chloe: You’re right on time.
Brad: Bradical!
Norman: (Cringing) You were in on this the whole time, weren’t you?
Brad: Oh hell yes! (Laughter)
Norman: Where’d you end up anyways.
Brad: Collecting my own personal anime harem.
Norman: (To Chloe) Told you it would happen. (Laughter)
Chloe: Oh well, c’mon we need to get serious. We’re up next.
(We turn back to Rarity and Coco)
Coco:Are you really that nervous that Norman would think less of you after seeing you at a convention?
Rarity: Of course he would, dear. He has a certain image of me. A fashionista, the girl everybody should know. Not some closeted anime nerd.
Coco: But what about what you told me...what about being yourself and…(She notices Rarity’s eyes locked on the stage and turns to look)
(On stage stand Brad, Norman and Chloe)
Chloe: Um...hit the music if you’d be so kind.
Norman: Music?
(Over the speakers, “Hare Hare Yukai” can be heard playing and Chloe starts dancing along to it)
Norman: Chloe? What in Faust’s name is this?
Chloe: Part of the contest.
Norman: You said nothing about dancing and…(he starts mimicking the moves along with Brad) What the hell?! My...my bodies moving on its own. (Laughter)
Chloe: Just try to keep up with me.
Norman: Brad...why do we know the moves to this?
Brad: Well, it might have something to do with Chloe making us watch the series in broadcast order, then chronological order and then twice more in each because she wanted to. 
Norman: Oh…(Laughter)
(At the end of the dance, the crowd begins cheering. The first person to stand up to clap is Rarity, which Norman notices)
Norman: (Yelling out to her) Rarity….is that you?
Rarity: (Realizing what she’s done) Oh...oh dear no…(She starts to run but is held by Coco) Coco, Darling, please let me go!
Coco: No senpai. You told me that real friends will love you for who you are and what you do. Why can’t you trust your boyfriend the same way?
Rarity: Because he’ll definitely hate me.
Coco: Do you love him?
Rarity: (Still Struggling) Yes!
Coco: And he loves you?
Rarity: Yes!
Coco: And does he make your Kokoro go Doki Doki? (Laughter)
Rarity:Yes!
Coco: Then show him the true you.
(Rarity look at Norman and sees him smiling at her. She closes her eyes and undergoes her Pony-up transformation appearing on stage before him.)
Rarity: Norman?
Norman: Yes, Rarity?
Rarity: You...you won’t break up with me because I like anime, right?
Norman: Of course not. I’ll always love you for you. 
(Rarity hugs and kisses him) (Awww)
Norman: Hell, this con would have been more fun if I knew you were here anyways.
Chloe: (Offended) Ahem. 
Norman: Not that it wasn’t somewhat fun, of course. (Laughter to end scene)


(After credits opens in Norman’s apartment. Rarity and Norman sit on the couch)
Norman: So the whole point of the show is that the girl who lives next door is secretly the seamstress of the boy she is in love with.
Rarity: Yes, darling.
Norman: And it’s called “My Little Seamstress can’t be this Cute”?
Rarity: Yes.
Norman: So it’s about my life then. (Aww)
(Rarity pecks him on the cheek)
Norman: So what were those books you bought at the con anyhow?
Rarity: (Nervously) Nothing you need to worry yourself about, dear. I must say, I do wonder who the artist “White Bunny” really is.
(Quick cut to a set of yellow hands working on a doujin page. A white rabbit jumps across the page)
Fluttershy: (V/O) Careful Angel. We can’t have you destroying my manuscript with tomorrow’s deadline. (Laughter)
(Back to the boy’s apartment)
Brad: (Entering heading toward the door) Well I’m off for the night.
Norman: Where to?
Brad: Twi wants me to meet a friend of hers. Moondancer. She writes fanfiction just like Twi. Maybe if I play my cards right, I’ll end up in a crossover fic with the two of them, Bradical! (Norman cringes so hard he falls off the couch. Laughter to end the episode)