"**FS** - ToSeeYourself - 2" By OneTripPony (https://pastebin.com/u/OneTripPony) URL: https://pastebin.com/xXgCyuVd Created on: Sunday 3rd of June 2012 10:58:09 PM CDT Retrieved on: Saturday 24 of October 2020 06:44:19 AM UTC > You hang there in the dark, suspended in place. > The cocoon of rope that binds you is secured tightly around your limbs and wings. > The pressure of hanging there gifts you with a persistant ache through each of them. > A dull strain that never stops, never lessens, only tightens over time. > It hurts, oh Celestia, it hurts! > You'd cry out, but the gag in your mouth blocks all attempts. > You'd just cry, but you have no tears left to shed. > The two way mirror infront of you saw to the last of those. > It was originally part of another plan... one among so many... to find out Anon's fetish. > It failed. > They all did. > So you used it to fix an old broken door in your bedroom. > If only you'd thrown it out... > The situation would have been the same, but... but at least you wouldn't have had to watch. > That hurt more than everything else.... the bruises, your limbs, everything. > To see somep0ny have all that you ever wanted... dreamt of... needed. > ...and that somep0ny was you. > The bed is still broken. > Anon and... and... her are trying to fix it. > You watch, hoping he'll look your way. > Willing him to move towards you... to find you. Save you. > She laughs with your stolen voice as he bangs his thumb with a hammer. > Anon sucks at his reddened thumb, laughing too, but with a gentle hoof... YOUR hoof, she draws down the injured hand. > ...and sucks slowly on the thumb, looking up at him with your teal, love filled eyes. > His laughter fades and he places a hand upon her head, stroking down your mane. > Then suddenly, snatches her up and throws her over his shoulder with a roar of lust. > She squeals and pummels his shoulders with mock resistance as he strides purposefully towards the doorway. > All the while she's smiling sweetly and staring at the mirror with those now green eyes. > They end up somewhere downstairs. > You don't have watch this time, but you still screw up your eyes. > It doesn't matter. > You can hear everything. > You are Fluttershy... > ...and it turns out you had some tears left after all. ----- Eleven Days Ago ----- > You walk the quick way back to p0nyville, despite the humiliation. > Normally, you'd go the long route, to avoid the glares, but Anon was decortating this morning. > You knocked on the door as usual, bright and early, smiling and shaking with anticipation. > The nerves, the excitement... was this going to be the one? Is this what'd get him to like you? To talk to you? > Just the same as usual. > ...and so you asked. "Um...A-anon? D-do you like p0ny r-rides?" > ...and just as usual, he answered. > Anon closed the door without a word. > Then opened it again and threw the bucket over you. > Wallpaper paste. > He closed the door again. > Then, just as you got the bucket off your head, he opened the door again. > That was exciting. > You really thought he'd changed his mind then. > You realised that wasn't the case when he ripped open the goosedown pillow over your head and said flatly "Fuck off, Fluttershy." > So that's why your going the quick way. > If the paste dries, it'll be murder to get off. > To make things worse, you don't think Rarity will give you a return on these jodhpurs and you lost the riding crop. > "Oh... oh dear. It didn't go well, did it darling?" "Uhuh..." > You look down to the floor, a little pout of sadness forming as Rarity leans on her just opened door. > You're covered in feathers and partially dried wallpaper paste. > A pair of mares walk past behind you, tittering behind thier hooves at your state. > Some distance behind you Snails is trying to revive Snips who saw you and laughed so hard he walked face first into a wall. > "...your mane? oh your mane! your beautiful, beautiful mane... it's...it's..." Rarity dabs it with a hoof. > A matted chunk of it clings to it as she pulls back, then detatches with a *shlrp* as she shakes it free of paste and tries to hide a disgusted wince with a forced smile. > "...it's... n-not too bad... la de da... we'll fix it up in a jiffy..." She keeps that smile locked, despite her eyes darting around like they're looking for escape routes. "...'kay..." > Your head hangs and you just can't look her in the face. > Always turning up at her door with problems... > You're either in a mess emotionally, or in a more literal sense. > ...and Rarity? > Always, without question or complaint, helps you. > When's the last time you did anything for her? > You can't remember. > Don't deserve her. "I d-dont want to cause you a-any trouble... I-i'll go home now... m'srry." > Rarity gives you a serious look. > It's enough to make you try to shy behind your mane, but that's currently jutting in the air where Rarity shook it off her hoof. > "...I have a better idea. I have nothing in my schedule this afternoon. Why don't I close the store up and bring forward our... hmn." > A small book floats out from the store in a cloud of blue as you try to back away. > The little pen dashes and darts about it until Rarity peers over the top and, with a bright smile says "...Spa day!" > You jump a little at the volume. "...oh no, but I couldn't possibly..." >...but it would be nice... and you'd get all cleaned up for tommorrow. >...and maybe Anon would like the smell of some of the new mane oils... > "...but nothing, deary. I have the time and you have the... ah... need. It'll be fun! We can relax... talk. Whens the last time we just talked, hmmm?" > You don't struggle as she guides you through the streets. > Rarity's spa days are something you've always enjoyed. > It's always peaceful. > Your mane is such a chore to brush alone... Angel always tugs at it. > Also, you do like to look your best. > The two of you lay face down on tables with holes cut out for your heads. > You can hear the rythmic thumping of two hooves on Rarity's back > "ooOOooOOooOOoohhh" > She seems to be enjoying herself. > Glancing to your right, you can just see her face with the silliest of smiles on it as she positively MELTS at the masseurs touch. > You stifle a giggle. > Your massage is a more gentle affair. > The wings are sensitive and require a careful hoof not to jar or sprain. > It is relaxing though... *sigh* > Your mind drifts to Anon and those strong looking hands. > That time he grabbed you by the forelegs... such a firm grip! > ...and those fingers? Oh, the things THEY could do. > He'd be so good at a job like this. > ...though, you don't like the idea of sharing him with other mares... > "Ahem... does miss require a moment to... collect herself?" > You raise your head and look at Rarity. > She's leaning up on her table, one hoof supporting her head as she adds "...indeed..." with a knowing smile. > You look back at the masseur, who's blush looks quite bright on her blue coat. > Both of your wings are fully unfurled and spread wide, quivering at the tips. > You blush so hot you're surprised you don't burst into flames. > Rarity lowers herself into the hot tub with a satisfied, drawn out sigh. > Both of you are wearing towels, towering around your manes. > The stress of the day, the faliure, the humiliation just bleeds out of you. > You sink lower, smiling wide and at peace while Rarity, eyes still closed asks "...so, dearest. Why don't you just talk to him?" "um..." > You've told her before how hard it is... How scared you are. > If you can make him like you before you try to talk... at least he won't re...reject you. "... s'hard..." > Rarity opens a single eye and looks at you as you sink further into the water for cover. > It's a stern look, softened only at the moment she talks... "...oh my dear friend... when was anything worth having ever easy?" "gblub-blub" > You've sunk down so far, your mouth is covered by the water. > "It's plain to anyp0ny that you lov- sorry!, sorry..." You blushed so hard, the water began to boil..."...*sigh* that you like him..." > "You are a sweet, kind, beautiful mare. You just aren't giving him time to see it. If only you were to..." "Blub-bloo." > Rarity sighs and with a glow of pale blue slowly raises your head from the water. > You look away, uncomfortable with her line of conversation. > She tries to advise you all the time... but she's such a confident, beautiful p0ny... > ...what she'd do, you could never find the confidence to. > She doesn't understand what it's like. "I...I... just... can't we just relax today? I'm so tired." > You are too. > So many faliures... > It's starting to get to you. > There has to be something... > Some way of making him see... > Rarity looks at you in silence for an uncomfortable moment and then lets out a breath. > "Very well. We won't bother with trivialities of the heart... today is for pampering and relaxing... but we will talk about this darling. Some other time." > You smile a grateful little smile. > Rarity had to leave early. > You suspect she wasn't quite being truthful about not having any work to do. > She took back the jodhpurs and outfit anyway, promising to clean them. > You are walking through the spa, when something catches your attention. > Two mares are chatting behind a wicker partition in the steam room part of the spa. > "...I didn't believe it either... what p0ny would?" > "...it can't be true though... Mr Breezy?" > The first one is Rose... you're sure of it... > Don't recognise the other. > "I know" continues rose "...everyp0ny thought he was a 'stallions stallion'... but sure enough, he was there, outside her house with flowers in his mouth..." > "...do you think that's why mrs cake has been walking funny too..." > The two of them titter. > You sidle up to wicker and wait quietly. > It's not REALLY eavesdropping... is it? > The second continues..."Well... I'm going to go and see for myself then." > "...oh, pshaw. Why would you need to visit a love-guru?" > "Nice of you to say... your a horrible liar Rose, but it's still nice." The two of them laugh. > "I'll come with you...it's not far down the road but it is the EverFree..." > Love-guru? > Everfree forest? > Road? > There's only one road close to p0nyville! > You could be there and back before sundown! > ... and walking funny by tommorrow... oh my... > You're not sure where that thought came from, but even a blush as bright as celestia's dawn isn't going to stop you now. > If p0nies comment on your galloping through town, flying short distances to bypass obstructions, you aren't around long enough to hear it. > Reaching the Everfree forest takes no time at all. > To many p0nies this is a place of long shadows and fearful sounds. > To you? > It's a tranquil, peaceful haven. > There's little in this forest that you don't know, creature or plant. > It's not a place to be scared of. > Perhaps, it's because here you know it's just you, nature and all her animals. > To you, other p0nies are more scary than any forest... sometimes than anything... > Well, maybe not dragons... > Ahead, parked at the side of the cracked and weed strewn road, you can see a gypsie style wagon. > It's small with a curved, sealed wooden roof and blue cloth drapes over the sides. > Stars and moons decorate the blue cloth and a set of steps at the back lead up to an open door and into the wagon. > It looks mysterious, but also slightly familiar... > You approach. > There is a small cookfire nearby with a bubbling pot on it. > You can smell carrots and parsley from here. > Your stomach gives an audible grumble. "...oh my..." > "Who dares disturb the rest of the great and...*eep*" > The p0ny who spoke leaps back into the shadows of the wagon, and begins clattering around desperately. "...um... excuse me?... I didn't mean to..." > She doesn't listen... such a familiar voice though. > The mare reappears with a wrapped turban, a viel of blue see through material and a red velvet dress draped around her... > Draped? > Actually, it does look like she's thrown drapes over herself now that you look closer. > ... and the turban looks like a skirt balled up... > You peer closer rubbing your chin with a hoof... > What IS that veil made of... > "P0ny whom the g-g-great, um, wanderina has never met before! Why are you here at tr.... that is wanderina's time of rest?" > It's a booming voice, the kind that belongs to a p0ny who brims with confidence > ... but she really does sound nervous about something too. "...erm... sorry... I just came here because I heard about the...um...Love-*mumble*" > The strange mare stares down at you "...the what?" " *mumblemumble* guru *squeak*" > Oh, Celestia. This is so embarrassing... > "...you want to see the love-guru? is that right, p0ny who is strange and new to wanderella." "...wanderina..." > "...that's what I said." She stares at you, daring another challenge. > Best not to argue, it'd be impolite. "...the g-guru... yes... um, please... If it's not too much troub-" > "*ahem* you will find the great, mysterious guru in a cave over yonder that is also mysterious. It's near a waterfall. Now, go!" "...thankyou..." > You move swiftly. > Time is wasting and that familiar p0ny has done you such a favor, pointing you in the right direction. ----- > The great and powerful Wandella... > Wanderina... > Wanderwhateva... > ...watches Fluttershy trot away smiling towards the forest and the waterfall. > Trixie (for it is she!) filled her canteens there yesterday. > It's far enough away for her to be able to pack up her things and get her wagon moving. > If that yellow pegasus has found her, even if she was too witless to match the cunning of the ever convincing and believable Trixie... > ... then Twilight, Tartarus take her, and the others can't be far behind... > It was a good gig while it lasted. > Listen to some hopeless, love smitten mares and thier pedestrain romances. > Tell them to be more confident in 'mysterious voice number 3' and flash some lights over their head. > If necessary, sell them a love potion made out of food colouring and leftovers. "Oh well, Trixie, time to find yourself a new town of rubes... appleloosa sounds nice this time of year..." ----- > The waterfall is ahead. > You hear the thrumming beat of falling water on rock and river as you approach. > The cave is just behind the waterfall, set in a rockface that juts up a good hundred feet. > By the time you're close enough to see the cave, the falling water is a thunderous accompanyment to the familiar noises of the forest. > Whether it's that, the anticipation or something else, you are feeling nervous about all of this. > Every instinct is telling you to flick your tail at this and gallop home. > ...but this could be the ONE. > The one thing you've been looking for. > Whoever this guru is, she... or he... might have the answer... > If you ran away now... just like you always do, Fluttershy... then you'd never forgive yourself. > You'd always wonder if this was your chance. > Your answer. > It's going to be hard, but... > ...like Rarity said, nothing worth having was ever easy. > With legs hollow and shaking you begin to gingerly walk towards the cave... "h-hello? is...um... anyp0ny there?" > You lean into the cave, sound of crashing water behind you. > The dark of the cave rumbles with the sound of the waterfall, like a growling beast. > You peer around nervously as your eyes adjust to the darkness. > ...there doesn't seem to be anyp0ny here... > "...who?" The voice is almost a hiss..."...who comes? sspeak." " *eep*...um... m'sorry... didn't meant to bother...wrong cave...um...I'll just see myself out." > You begin to back away, but the voice, closer now, speaks again. > "...I can smell it on you...love. Tell me, pegasuss. Why do you seek me out, hmm?" The voice is less hiss like now. > This... this p0ny is creepy. > Rose and her friend didn't mention that. > ...but it mentioned 'love'... maybe... > You have to know, Fluttershy. > You have to. "...are you the, um, guru? The other p0nies said you can help... do you..." > You gulp. " ...do you know about love? I...I need help... please?" > The voice laughs... > At first it sounds... strange, but becomes softer, kinder... > A shape slowly steps into the light. > A mare, deep brown with flowing black mane. > A veil with bits threaded through a string on her brow covers her face. > "My dear one... there is nothing in this world about 'love' that I do not know. All of it's secrets are mine to know... and share." > She smiles beneath the viel, brown deep eyes glistening. > You leave her a short time later and begin to trot through the woods towards home. > The two of you talked, sat upon a log outside of the cave. > She was still... strange in the fading light of the day. > ...but she was nice, even if she did stare a lot. > You told her about Anon... about how you thought about him all the time... dreamt about him... needed him. > About how you just couldn't tell him. > Were too scared to approach him without... something to help you out. > Too afraid. *rustle* > What was that? > You stop for a moment, looking behind you into the gloaming light, casting long shadows in the forest... > Nothing... > This is the EverFree forest. > There's nothing for YOU to be afraid of in here. > Shaking your head, you trot onwards. > Not long to go. > As the two of you talked, she watched intently, listened to everything... > Told you about males... how they need to be lured. > That chasing spooks them. > Make them come to you. > Make them want you. > Then, make them NEED you. > It sounded... so complicated. > ...but she sounded so confident. > ... and the stories she told... > You blush as you think back. > It's going to be tough, but you have a plan now. > Leave Anon alone for a couple of days... He'll come looking for you. > Then, wearing something alluring *heehee*...you can't help giggle at that word... you let him into YOUR home, where you have the advantage. > ...and then... and... then. > Oh my. > You're blushing again. > ...and smiling! > You see your home, an impatient Angel is standing on top of the chicken coop, clanging his bowl with a spoon and watching you approach. > Heading to feed your darling bunny, ducking his thrown bowl, you hum to yourself as you think about Anon. > This is going to WORK. ----- > Two green eyes watch Fluttershy from the treeline. > A thin, malevolent smile widens beneath them. > This one was so loving... > So RIPE. > ...but there was another. > If it did things right, it could feed on both. > Play them against each other. > Feast. > Grow strong. > Yessss. > Worth risking a solitary meal for a banquet. ----- Three days later. ----- > You run along the path back to your home. > Tears still well in your eyes. "oh...R-rar-*sob*" > Rarity... > How could she? > She talked to Anon while you were trying the clothes... > Afterward, she said it was just 'giving him a little nudge.' > She told you how you 'needed to tell him the truth. "Stop the tricks, the schemes. Stop hiding from him and let him see you" > It sounded so different to what the guru had told you... but it sounded right... > You didn't know what to do. > Then... then, she told you he'd gone. > Who did you see outside? > Of course, Anon. > You just know she told him to run after you. > She couldn't just... just... leave you alone. > Had to interfere. > You told her this time your plan would work. > Told her that it WAS different this time. > She didn't believe you. > Nop0ny believes poor, little Fluttershy can do anything on her own. > You leap and with a flurry of wingbeats glide your fence, landing near the door. > You open the door, leaving it ajar behind you and collapse onto your couch, still sobbing. > Because of what happened, you had to talk to Anon. > Told him everything. > Everything just flooded out. > He listened. > Then he nearly said he 'wanted to be friends.' *snf* > That... was the worst. > Had to nearly beg so you didn't hear those words. > Even unsaid, you know now. > You love him... but he'll never love you. > You're just Fluttershy, friend to everyp0ny, special to none. > A knock at the door, which swings slowly open, causes you to look up and see the shadow in the doorway. > "...Fluttershy? ...are you here... I want to talk to you. There's something I... I need to tell you." > Your heart leaps. > Could it be? > Was Rarity right? > ... you came home. > He had to come to you... > Where they both right? > ...does it matter? "...c-come in... um... please?" > He strides into the room. > Tall, so tall. > ...and those eyes... > When they look at you... Your legs feel hollow, your head feels light... > You forget everything. "...y-yes? A-anon?" > He leans down to you and say's the words you've dreamt about "...Fluttershy. I need you." > He opens his arms to embrace you, > You leap forward into them, smiling, tears of joy falling... > He wraps those big, safe feeling arms around you and everything in the world feels right. > You don't see the smile, wide and full of the wrong kind of hunger. > You don't see those eyes, so beautiful, glint with a sick green tint. ----- Now ----- > With a start, you awaken. > It's dark outside. > Your wings... feel numb. > They don't hurt, but that can't be good. > You legs still ache, and let their protest known as you shift. > A whimper tries to escape your mouth, but the gag does it's work. > Dreaming. > You were dreaming of the day when this all started. > You hang there, lost and broken. > ...and then he walks into the room. > Anon is wearing one of his nicer outfits. > Looks like the kind that you'd go out for a meal in. > He looks so handsome... > Standing there, he adjusts his suit then combs his hair in the mirror, but 5 feet away from you. > You squirm..... try to shout... weep with rage... anything! > ...but he doesn't hear. > Anon turns and walks for the stairs. > Your head hangs and you sob... > Anon peers back into the room, puzzled. > He walks in, slowly, stealthily. > You notice his approach, eyes widening as you see him draw closer... > Closer! > His hand reaches out for the doorhandle and slowly, begins to turn it. > The door creaks open, causing him to wince, but you? > You don't care. "mmmf! mmmfmf!" > "...F-fluttershy? why are you?... I told you... you don't have to do things like this anymore... Just talk to me." > He looks worried. > He can tell something isn't right. "mfff mmmfffmf" > "Fluttershy?" He asks, nervously, as he reaches for the gag... tentatively at first, then frantic as he works it free. "bwah hah hah *gasp* o-oh Anon... *sob* th-thank Celestia..." > ".'shy...who did this to you? who?" He cradles your head in both his strong but still gentle hands. "... chan... *gasp* change..." > He leans in and whispers "It's over now... Shhh." > He kisses you. > His lips are firm, confident and, for a brief moment, take away all the hurt in the world. > You close your eyes, sensing nothing but his touch on you. > Your head spins, you feel dizzy... > He's everything you ever... > ...he draws back suddenly. > "Don't want to be greedy now, do I Fluttershy?" > You open you eyes, blinking... > ...and see the familiar tint of green in his. "...nooo...*sob*" > "Quiet" he say's callously, with HIS stolen voice, and punctuates the command with a slap to your face. "NO! What have you done with him? Tell me... let me go... I'll... I'll... I'll..." > You throw yourself around in the cocoon of rope, uncaring of the pain it causes you, fury powering your limbs. > Releasing a yell louder than you ever have before, you try to bash into the changeling. > Just to strike back, however futile. > You're screaming now, letting free a rage built up over a lifetime of backing down... > You snap a bite at his stolen hands as he tries to gag you again. > The backhand blow this earns you doesn't hurt, at first, but the impact shakes your whole body, leaving you reeling and knocking the fight out of you.. > Something crunched worryingly in your cheek... > A bone? > You don't know, but your face feels like it's swelling already. > The ball is forced into your mouth while you tremble and squirm, resisting with all you have left. > Your rage has fled you and now, the ache becomes a dull pain, slowly worsening. > He turns to you as he shuts the door, wiping your blood of his stolen hand "Oh, come now. did you really think it was over?" ----- > You hang there, the rope creaking. > Steeling yourself for the pain, you ready to swing again. > Dust from above falls again onto your head. > Each time you swing, a little more falls. > It's been this way since the changeling punched you so hard... so hard. > It looks like it doesn't know it's... no. Anons own strength. > The weakened hook above loosens more wood. > You look up at the joist above with a firey determination in your eyes. > Each swing is agony. > It's hard... but Rarity told you about that. > Every time you're that little bit closer to freedom. > Not long now. > It was right about something, the changeling. "Did you really think it was over?"