"Based Slut Anon"
By LaPsbin (https://pastebin.com/u/LaPsbin)

URL: https://pastebin.com/jqSwsu1w
Created on: Monday 12th of October 2020 07:52:42 PM CDT
Retrieved on: Saturday 24 of October 2020 01:12:05 AM UTC


>"Anon, sit down soldier. That's an order."
>You blinked
"I'm not a soldier. I'm a janitor. I'm also pretty sure you don't have any authority over me."
>Spitfire, dressed in her royal blues scrunched her muzzle up
>"Quit with your sass and get your flank in that chair," she said, pointing toward said chair
>You thought about it for few seconds before shrugging
>Why not?
>Leaning your broom against the wall, you walked over and sat down
>The chair, of course, was far too small for your giant alien body, but you made do
"What can I do for you capt'n?"
>"That's CAPTAIN, rookie."
"Again, I'm a janitor. You're also a three foot tall horse."
>"This three foot tall horse could have you thrown in the brig, stallion or not," she said, pulling her shades off and tossing them onto her desk. "Now hush and listen."
>Crossing your legs, you leaned back in the chair
>It creaked, somehow not exploding into pieces as you gestured her to continue
>Spitfire coughed into her hoof
>"Alright. I'm sure you heard of the new ordinance passed for anypony in the military, right?"
"Nope."
>"I--wait, really? You work on a military base!"
"Again. Janitor."
>"That doesn't--"
>She sighed
>"Well, there was a big hoopla a few weeks back. A unit of Solar Guard apparently took advantage of one of their male members. I was told it got bad. It was a huge scandal; outcry, protestors, the whole shebang. It got so bad that we got orders from on high. If a mare even LOOKS at a stallion when they set hoof on a base, there's Tartarus to pay."
"That sucks."
>"Oh, you have no idea. It's a logistical nightmare. It would have been easier if the princess just kicked all males out of the military. In their infinite wisdom they didn't, and we've had to improvise until cooler heads prevail. That's why I had to ship most of the male 'Bolts out. Even in the cavalry we have a reputation for corndogness."
"What."
>"What what?"
"You're all horses. Shouldn't that mean you're all cavalr--"

>"What did I tell you about that sassy, soldier?!"
"Janitor."
>"Shutyourbigmouthupgoshdarnit! The new rules haven't been good for my mares. Weeks and weeks of nothing but a clam show in this Celestia damned base is driving some of them bonkers. That's why I'd like to offer you job."
"A job."
>"Yes, you big, green parrot, a job. Its a job that technically hasn't been issued in a thousand or so years, but it was never explicitly retired or disallowed."
>Spitfire put her shades back on
>You don't know why
>It wasn't bright in this room
>"My ancestors called it nidum patriae amore. You... take care of my girls."
>Your eyes narrowed
"You want me to be a whore?"
>Spitfire groaned
>"It's not a whore, you featherhead. Think of it as..."
>Her brow furrowed in thought
>"...as not a bucking whore. Look, you'll cook, you'll clean--"
"I already clean."
>"HUSH! You'll keep my mares in line, you'll listen to them, rub their wings, if you want you can screw them. Just make sure they're focused on their training and in fighting shape!"
"So, a whore with extra steps then?"
>"It's a cultural tradition."
"I don't give a good goddamn about your horse traditions. I'm a giant green asshole."
>"You can fool around with some of the fittest and best looking mares in Equestria! Even for a stallion that's a good deal."
"You haven't cleaned up after those weirdos. Also, I'm pretty sure Fleetfoot has never kissed a colt, and Rainbow doesn't know how babies are made."
>With a groan, Spitfire flapped her wings
>Papers flew everywhere as she launched herself into the air
>She stopped just shy of hitting the ceiling, doing a flip before landing heavily onto her desk
>Standing as she was, she was nearly eye-to-eye with you

>"Look, the girls are getting bad. I keep catching them trying to sneak phallic things in their barracks," she said, a hint of desperation creeping into her voice. "One of them had a cactus, Anon. A. CACTUS. I need somepony to help, and by law, it can't actually be a PONY. You're not a pony. I'm pretty sure you're legally not supposed to be on this PLANET--"
"Don't worry about it."
>She smiled a paper thin smile, leaning forward until her noses were almost touching
>"Look. I'm double your pay. I'll also make sure you get a nice, fat army pension. It's not had work. There's eight mares on this team, including me. You can keep track of them. I'll even listen to your feelings and rub your back at night. All you bucking need to do is nod that head and sigh some paperwork."
"I get a pension for being a slut?"
>"If you say slut again I swear on Luna's moon that I'm going to have an episode."
>A pen was stuck under your nose
>"Just say yes please. Please."
>You scratched your chin, looking up at the ceiling
"I have some demands."
>"Suggestions."
"DEMANDS."
>Spitfire sighed
>Covering her face with a wing, she motioned for you to begin
"I demand that you wear socks at least twice a week."
>"I'll wear them for thirty minutes in the privacy of this room," she replied
"I also demand oral sex. Everyday."
>"I'll break you with this mouth. Next."
"I'd like a room here as well. To live and have the oral sex in."
>Turning around, Spitfire hopped off her desk
>"I can arrange that. I can also have somepony pick your things up at your current residence."
>Grabbing some papers, she pushed them toward you
>The pen was tossed on top of them
>"Anything else?"
>You hummed
"A pizza party twice a month on Fridays."
>"I'll buy you a bucking pizza and we can call it a bucking pizza party. Anywhere you like too."
"Deal," you said with a snap of your finger
>With a flourish, you picked up the pen, scribbled on the papers where you needed, and dropped the pen on the ground
>Boom
Mic drop
"So, when do I start?"
>tfw you didn't realize until later that you didn't read any of the fine print
>Spitfire didn't technically HAVE to give you anything
>Thankfully, she was grateful enough to give in to most of your demands
>Especially the oral sex

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_

>Be Spitfire
>You know, when you had a good idea you had a bucking good idea
>The human had been one heck of a slu--err, one heck of an army approved comfort stallion
>In less than a week he had the whole base in tip top shape
>The barracks were spotless, the food was leagues better, even your girls were sharp, alert, and ready for everything
>Alien or not, a stallion was a stallion
>Home rearing was in their DNA, and that was proved yet again
>Heck, you even managed to get him to take massage and first aid classes
>Meaning you wouldn't need to bother the staff doctor every ten minutes
>The top brass might be trying to give you guff, but you had really nailed this one
>Sure there were a few hiccups
>It had been a pain in the flank trying to find him a room big enough for him
>It was also a huge pain in the flank getting all of his stuff moved
>You knew colts like to have a lot of stuff, but he had a load of shit
>And not only did you have to bring it to the base, you needed to help him arrange everything so that it was nice and neat
>Which took a whole bucking day...
>He might have also been the most whimsical stallion you've ever met
>To be fair though, you've heard all humans were like that, but that didn't make it easier
>He had also been completely serious about the socks thing
>You didn't even know where he had gotten them, or how he knew your size, but one day you just had a few sets of long, stripped socks that you had to wear everyday
>Honestly?
>It wasn't HORRIBLE
>You'd never, ever admit it, but they were weirdly comfortable
>It was also really, really fun sliding down the hallway with them on after it was waxed
>This was still one of the best ideas you've ever had, which was saying something
>You even got some alone time with him every morning, as he had DEMANDED
"Gulp.... guk... guk... guk..."
>You were lying in his bed--complete with Wonderbolt sheets and comforter on top of him, pussy in his face, his dick down your throat

>He was no earth pony, but he was a heck of a mouthful
>Your throat was getting one heck of a stretch
>But you weren't some rookie
>Wonderbolts didn't succeed, they excelled
>You had your nose pressed against his pelvis, tongue swirling around his shaft
>It he HAD been a colt, this trick would have emptied those nuts of his ten minutes ago
>As it was, you were trying to hold back your third orgasm of that morning
>And failing
>Your eyes half-opened, crossing as your wings twitched
>You came all over the human's face, body shaking as you groaned around his cock
>Damn that tongue of his!
>You frantically bopped and twisted your head, sucking so hard that your cheeks concaved
>He was pulsing, and leaking his salty, pre
>He was almost there...
>Just a little more...
>Humming, still midway through an orgasm, you pulled back until just his cockhead was in your mouth
>That was when you pulled out all the stops
>Licking, kissing, sucking, doing things with your tongue that would make your dad go blind
>You also began to jerk him off with your hooves, as quickly as you could
>Even then, it took another minute or so before you heard Anon groaning between your legs
>If there hadn't been a dick in your mouth, you'd had let out a sigh as you felt the first rope cum hitting your tongue
>You continued to jerk and suck as your mouth was filled
>You tried to swallow as quickly as you could, but eventually your muzzle was coated in cum and the stuff was coming out of your nose
>Eventually, you had to pull completely out to get a lungful of air
>A rope of cum shot into your mouth, and another hit you square in the muzzle, making you shudder
>The last spurt of cum hit your throat, and with that all the tension left Anon's body
>Bucking horndog of a stallion...
>One eye shut, you slowly rolled off him onto the bed
"A little *cough* warning next time," you said, picking your head up to glare at him

>You wanted to be made, really, you did, but seeing his face coated in your cum made it real hard to
>Anon, as usual, had a dumb grin on his face
>"Sorry, won't happen again," he said, giving your rump a pat
>Bucking liar...
>You laid your head down, closing your eyes
>Just trying to catch your breath
>You were able to do so for about a minute, before you felt a hand cupping your teat
>Oh no
>Not today
>Your one eye not covered in cum snapped open, and you quickly rolled out of bed
"Not today soldier! It's chow at 0600!"
>You quickly wobbled to the bathroom as Anon let out a disappointed groan, quickly pulling your socks off
>If any of the girls would have seen you turn down free sex, you'd have heard it until the end of time
>But you had shit to do
>Besides, you wanted to be able to WALK today, thank you very much
>You were old enough to realize your bucking limits
>Anon helped clean you
>Gave you a good scrubbing, brushing, and even trimmed your coat
>In less than ten minutes, he had you parade ready
>You had him putting on his uniform--something much like yours but bigger and with an apron--and you were both out the door
>It looked like the other girls were already up
>Many grinned as you both walked by
>Shower or not, it wasn't easy to get the scent of sex off you
>The human's scent was one of the most potent you or any of the other girls had smelled
>It knocked poor Vapor Trail off her hooves the first time he had come into the barracks in just his underwear
>The mare had just had a bad break up with her coltfriend
>Apparently bucking Judy got him
>Broke her heart
>After he was done with her, Vapor forgot all about him
>And basically everything else
>Anon waved and greeted each of the girls
>He smacked some rumps
>Picked up Fleetfoot and gave her kisses, which she seemed to enjoy
>Eventually you made it into the mess hall
>Anon went back here to belonged
>The kitchens
>"Alright. We're having pancakes today!" he called
>You groaned
>Again?
>Buck

~_~_~_~_~_~_~

>Be Anon
>Once upon janitor, now Wonderbolt base's "comfort stallion"
>Or so Spitfire things
>You didn't sleep with any of the other little horses
>Or even fingerbanged them
>A lot of the mares were raised better than Spitfire thought
>They might fuck a groupie, but not you
>They knew you
>You've been cleaning up their base for months
>A few liked to think of you as the "base dad"
>Sure, you practiced kissing with Fleetfoot, but that was sorta it
>Most of what Spitfire thought you were doing was just you and the girls fucking with her
>She didn't want you "doing it"
>Something about not wanting to gawk at her teammates like some sort of dyke
>It was her own fault really
>All you needed to do was fake moan for a few minutes while everyone tried not to laugh
>That didn't mean you didn't partake in your other duties
>Fleetfoot got her kissing practice
>Most of the girls got massages and their hooves looked at
>You cooked, cleaned
>Vapor Trail had been having a rough go with her coltfriend which you helped out
>Dash still didn't know where babies came from, so she wasn't an issue
>The girls seemed to really appreciate everything you did
>Which was nice
>You also got to fuck the captain's throat and eat that horsepuss every single morning
>Which was even better
>You were getting so good at eating her out that sometimes she'd just lay in your bed with you, dead to the world
>That was when you'd kiss her all over, which she seemed to both enjoy and be embarrassed by
>She had started sleeping with you at night
>Said that it was easier than having to walk all the way from her room to yours in the morning
>Sometimes, when she thought you were asleep, she'd just kiss and hug you
>If she kept that up she'd be a mother
>The girls were taking bets already how quick it'd be, and how many Spitfire would pop out
>You have a hundred bits down on twins