"[AiE] Metastasis"
By 4th (https://pastebin.com/u/4th)

URL: https://pastebin.com/VhMDncGc
Created on: Monday 9th of July 2018 12:54:41 PM CDT
Retrieved on: Monday 26 of October 2020 03:30:36 AM UTC


>A boulder the size of a carriage passes right over you.
>Pulling a black flag of smoke in its wake.
>You stare in horror as it collides with Canterlot's Cathedral of the Sun, taking a whole bell-tower with it.
>The sound of shattering glass and collapsing stonework is deafening, despite being on the far side of the cathedral plaza.
>Clasping your hooves over your ears, drowning out the sound of crashing debris.
>The ground beneath your hooves shakes as if an earthquake was hitting Mt. Dawn.
>In all your years, you've never seen a crowded place like this vacate so quickly.
>Screaming ponies flee in every direction.
>"Invasion! Invasion!"
>"Changelings? Is it the changelings again?!"
>"Tirek's back!"
>"I think I saw Nightmare Moon, help!"
>The terrified ponies shout whatever comes to their minds, panic spreads like wildfire, the usual.
>With a mighty strike of your wings, you propell yourself high up into the air.
>In the direction the boulder came from stampedes Dregrek through the city, Tirek's older brother, proclaiming revenge for his sibling.
>He is as large as a two story house and his colors are foul, compared to his brother's, but he is little more than show.
>Twilight isn't even needed for this, not a terribly big crisis, in your humble opinion.
>The only magic he casts are hexes and subtle zebra magic, your sister is merely toying with him at this point, you're certain.
>The colossus swipes his logs for arms around him.
>A golden light zips back and forth, directing magic of a brilliant light at him at every turn.
>It's not really doing much, besides making him angry. His freakish face contorts in frowns and grimaces.
>Ugly.
>Back in your day, the villains at least tried to be aesthetic.
>You watch for a while, curious why your sister does not finish the unsightly creature then and there.
>Her attacks leave little more than light scorch marks, she could turn him into a pile of gray ash in an instant.
>You wonder whether or not you should step in, Dregrek is not magic resistant. A single appliance of your own magic arsenal would end this in an instant, so why is she...
"Oh."
>You hold a hoof in front of your muzzle as your sister's intent finally dawns on you.
>She leads the creature the the edge of the city.
>Hmm...
>What an unneccesity.
>You decide to step in.
>A slight itch of hunger in your midsection makes you wonder if the cooks still prepared lunch for the royal family, or if they fled the city at the first sign of trouble again, so skittish.
>You approach the battle.
>Dregrek roars in his anger at your sister, who effortlessly avoids every single attack he throws at her.
>Your ears ring from his bellow.
>She actually managed to lead him back through the swath of destruction he made when entering the town.
>Your subjects fled already, all she does is protect bricks and cobblestone.
>Such a waste of time.
>You're close enough to understand most of the words the colossus is yelling.
>Mostly vain insults.
>Insect, he calls her. A bug. As if his size could save him now.
>Back in your day, villains would give a lenghty and well prepared monolouge or speech.
>It was considered a courtesy.
>This animal, however, annoys you. You're almost angry when you begin to cast your spell.
>Your sister notices "Luna! No!"
>Sorry, sister.
>Not this time.
>Like the conductor of an orchestra, you gently aim your horn across Dregrek as you let go.
>The dark, thin beam slices through the enormous mass of bone, muscle and sinew, slicing not only the creature, but also a row of buildings behind him in half.
>Oops, that was a bit too much.
>Oh well.
>Can't make everypony happy.
>The upper half of the monster falls, primate half bisected from his equine part, his expression telling you that he doesn't quite understand what's happening.
>His lower half merely collapses in on itself and rolls off to the side, squashing into the buildings you damaged while his torso impacts the ground with another reverberating earthquake.
>Dust is kicked up into the city streets, an impenetrable wall of ash and dirt.
>"Sister, why? I was about to convince him!" your sister implores as she approaches you high above the battlefield "He was about to stop, I know it!"
>Ugh...
>She's became soft over the years. There are times when that is a good thing, among friends and with your subjects.
>But not with your enemies.
"He did not deserve a second chance."
>Your reply is much colder than you anticipated, he must have annoyed you more than you thought.
>He was very rude, after all.
>"Luna, you couldn--" your sister's voice is drowned out by a horrible laugh.
>You both turn to Dregrek's upper half, his foul innards spilled all over the streets.
>"You puny pests!" he laughs, blood draining from his face quickly "I doom you!"
>Celestia looks down on him in frightened anticipation.
>He makes a quick gesture with a hand as he props himself up on an elbow, dark symbols, oozing vileness, flowing from his hand and onto the street.
>"Hear my call and obey, I summon thee, Anon--" you cut him short with another spell of the same breed, severing his skull from his jaw, as well as the rest of his body.
>The lifeless body crashes to the ground, kicking up dust and debris for the last time with a hollow thud.
"There. Done."
>You glance over to your sister, hovering next to you above the city.
>She's afraid.
>Her mouth hangs slightly open and deep wrinkles appear on her forehead "No... not him."
>You're about to ask her why she still worries when she whips around and grabs you by the shoulders.
>"Luna! Quick, with me!" she spurts out, all manners forgotten.
>She thrusts herself towards the giant corpse, flying over it, searching for something.
"What is your concern, sister? Clearly the brute lies slain."
>The gold white alicorn follows along the left arm, flying so close that she gags from the smell.
>"There!" she points down to his fingertips, something dark slithers along the ground. Rolling up into a ball like a black snake.
>The two of you move closer to inspect "Luna, he summoned Anonaki, a demon I imprisoned in Tartarus hundreds of years ago. It slew countless of our subjects, I couldn't destroy it! I didn't have the power, we need to work together, there can be no doubt!"
>Her voice quivers.
>Oh sister, how far you've fallen from the old ways.
>You smile gently and nod.
"Together."
>Her features soften as you give her confidence.
>"Together." she repeats softly.
>A moment later you both focus on what's happening in front of you, emboldened.
>The vile runes have formed a circle, they flow along the ground like a projection of light, only made of shadow.
>You step away from Celestia, and you both position yourselves strategically, ready to unleash your deadliest spells.
>You even play with the thought of inviting the Nightmare back into yourself, should all else fail. You can control it.
>The summoning circle begins to expand upwards, any second now.
>"Luna, I have a plan. I need you to distract him the very second he appears."
>You did ruin her plan for Dregrek, and she knows what you're dealing with here. You'll let her lead this time.
"Very well, sister."
>The summoning circle hums audibly, it's time.
>You pre-charge your spell, tapping into the Nightmare with the very tip if your hoof for this one.
>Then the circle breaks and a figure appears in a flash without light.
>Within the second of Anonaki appearing, you grab for him with your magic.
>"I did it!" the newly summoned fiend proclaims "It worked! Where them cute ponies at?! AAH--"
>Your spell reaches him, and you take his light.
>He cups his face, screaming, collapsing onto his elbows.
>Celestia, having super-charged her own spell, speaks through gritted teeth, her eyes glowing white with magic, her horn sparking with power "No, that isn't... him."
>She tilts her horn up and fires a convex cone of brilliant light upwards into the sky, the heat of which singes your mane from all the way over there.
>Shaking her head to get rid of magical residue and ricochets, she speaks "That's not Anonaki, sister. It must be a new evil. His incantation was interrupted, after all."
>Another one?
"Then let me finish it."
>You charge the same spell that felled Dregrek, aimed at the cowering creature.
>"No! Please, sister!" you cease charging and give her the raised eyebrow.
>"We cannot go on killing everything in out path like in the old days, please." she's so whiny "Let's try to talk to it first."
>And that quickly you're annoyed again.
>Another waste of time.
>Bureaucracy sucked every last ounce of efficiency out of her over the past thousand years, it's a tragedy.
"Do what you must."
>Not even the 100 layers of sugarcoating you applied to these words could mask your disapproval completely.
>Only one creature in the whole world knows you well enough to pick up on it, unfortuneately, that one creature is your sister.
>"I'm sorry, Luna. Things have changed much, I appreciate your patience greatly."
>No!
>That's not how--
>She should be --
>Ugh...
>You kick some pebbles in your frustration.
>Celestia trots over to the creature and you follow along, keeping a magical barrier spell at the tip of your horn.
>Just in case.
>As you approach, you notice the fiend looking around in disorientation, his hands alternating between feeling carefully along the ground and checking his face.
>"Hello." your sister stops a few meters away "My name is Princess Celestia and this is my dear sister Princess Luna. I welcome you to Canterlot, capital of Equestria and seat of our regency."
>She waits for a few moments, giving the fiend ample time to reply.
>He faces her, but his eyes do not focus.
>"I- Is it dark in here? Hello? Where am I? What's happening?"
>Your sister gives you a confused glance "You're in Canterlot. May I know who you are?" she asks warily.
>"Canterlot? So it worked after all... I'm Anonymous. Human. Are you ponies? I can't seem to see anything, is it night?"
"Why are you here?"
>Your words are harsh, your tone unforgiving.
>"I, uhh." he's afraid, or at least acts afraid. It could all be a trick.
"Your appearance was promised to come along with our destruction. Give me one reason why I shouldn't teleport your organs to another part of this world."
>The pristine alicorn next to you makes a grimace and looks at you with begging eyes.
>Maybe you laid it on too thick?
>"'cause I need those?" Anonymous asks "What's going on? I'm not the enemy here, I came here to pet ponies and fu--" he cuts himself off abruptly "Never mind. You're the princesses, right?"
>"Indeed we are." your sister replies kindly.
>She closes the distance between Anonymous and herself, her hooves gently clopping on the rubble.
>"We were afraid you'd be somepony else, but it seems we were wrong."
"Sister."
>Your voice is one of harsh distrust.
"We cannot know this. He might be disguising his true intent, waiting for the time to strike. It is no ordinary stallion, your endless indulgence needs to know its boundaries."
>Celestia inhales deeply and sighs, her eyes moving back and forth between Anonymous and you "What do you propose?" she asks eventually.
>Your answer comes immediately.
"Imprisonment, Anti-Magic Shackles, extensive interrogations and around-the-clock observation."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

+++ 2 months later +++
+++ Ponyville +++
>"So, to be completely honest with you, Twilight: A.K. Yearling turning into a romantic novelist, absolutely not cool."
"You might want to reconsider, Rainbow. Oftentimes, artists keep things their fans enjoy when jumping genre. Surveys show that over 70% of her previous fans do enjoy her new line of books just as much as the original Daring Do series."
>The cyan mare rolls her eyes "Surveys, schmurveys. I just wanna read some gripping action."
"The books have action, just of a different kind."
>"Why're we waitin' here at the train station again?" Applejack asks bored.
>Dash flaps her wings and gets right in AJ's face, eyes wide and her voice deep and creepy "We're gonna greet an ancient evil, an unspeakable demon, and welcome him into our community."
>The orange mare swats Dash to the side with a flick of her hoof, fanning some air to herself "Ha ha, very funny. Ah reckon yer gonna beat it with yer smell."
>You give Dash a questioning glance.
>"W-What?" she stutters "Haven't had the time for a shower yet, come on. You know how busy I am. And it's hot anyways, what's the deal?"
>She raises her little forehooves with a shrug, staring at the farm pony and you apologetically.
>The train approaches in the distance. White smoke billows from the locomotive and the telltale horn toots twice, announcing itself.
>Celestia wrote you in a myriad of letters about this, Luna, in secrecy from her sister, as well.
>Ironically, or maybe fittingly, their letters were like night and day.
>While your benefactor wrote in high praise and amusement about Anonymous, Luna smelled treachery behind every one of his actions.
>Where Celestia had pleasant evenings by tea and treats with him, her sister chained him to the next best object and interrogated him under the threat of a whip.
>When the Princess of the Sun exchanged innocent secrets with him, the Princess of the Moon would steal into his dreams and stalk his thoughts.
>In the end, the princesses told you that it became too distracting, and asked you for a favor.
>The human would stay with you for a while.
>Just a short one.
>Eventually the noise of the train drowned out your thoughts.
>Dash and AJ still knee-deep in banter, ignore the passengers exiting the wagons, crowding the trainstation in a herd of ponies from all tiers of society.
>Buff earthponies arrive, builders and workers, if their cutiemarks and bags of tools are anything to go by.
>The town hall has been due for a renovation, a big one. Mayor Mare inherited a lot of bits and is currently spending it all on improving Ponyville.
>She deserves a medal for her selflessness.
>Oh, wait. You're a princess, you'll give her one.
>Crisis averted, good job, Twilight.
>On to the next.
>A bipedal figure that can only be Anonymous exits a wagon down the track, dead last of the crowd of passengers.
>You catch his hand resting casually on the shoulder of a pegasus stallion with pale blue coat and dark blue mane.
>They are locked in a conversation, both smiling and laughing.
>Your two friends spotted them ahead of you and already made their way halfway over to them, snaking through the cloud of ponies that now board the train.
>"Hey, Soarin'!" Rainbow yells exhiliarated and breaks into a light trot "What are YOU doing here?"
>The long guy looks around in confusion, his hand holding the Wonderbolt in place.
>Curious, you're sure the athletic stallion could subdue this guy without breaking a sweat. Then again, they appear to be on good terms.
>You figure that theorizing is unneeded, as you can just ask them.
>Dash and Soarin' clop two hooves together.
>"Yeeeeeeh~"
>"Yeeeheeee~"
>"Who's your new buddy, buddy?" Rainbow asks.
>"Buddy buddy?" the stallion holds a hoof to his chin.
>"You know. Tall wiry dude, walks on two legs, has been touching you since you arrived."
>Anonymous points a finger at himself with a confused expression.
>His powers of deduction are breathtaking.
>Soarin shifts his view towards you "Princess." he nods acknowledgingly, then turns to AJ "Miss Applejack." he says, nodding again. "This is Anonymous." pats the long guy on the shoulder three times and continues "I take it you've been briefed on the situation?"
>Dash scratches the side of her head "Assignment? I didn't get anything, I'm just here 'cause Twi asked me."
"He meant me, Rainbow. Don't worry."
>The cyan mare flaps up into the air in disbelief "A top secret mission and I'm not in on it?! Seriously? I'm a Wonderbolt too! Come ooon."
>Anonymous sniffs the air as Dash flaps her wings, his eyebrows furrow in a puzzled expression.
"If you want to, ahem. 'Greet the new resident of Ponyville and help him settle in', then be my guest."
>Your recital of this mornings letter takes all the wind out of her sails.
>"Oh, uh. Sounds boring." she mumbles while landing back on her four hooves quietly.
>While you're busy with Rainbow, the other mare goes up to Anonymous.
>Her eyes are lasers, staring unrelentingly into his. He doesn't even look at her.
>Applejack extends a little hoof in an attempt to greet him "Howdy, ah'm Applejack. Nice ta meet'cha." but is ignored.
>She doesn't falter in her approach, and instead of withdrawing adds a "Big fella." to her sentence.
>The realization that she means him comes with a big wince "Oh, shhhh- sorry. I uhhh, thought you were talking to Soarin."
>The stallion slaps him on the thigh, eliciting a muffled yelp "She's trying to shake your hoof." he whisper-shouts.
>You're pretty sure those are called hands.
>"Oh, uh. Haha, sorry. Lemme just..." he let's go of Soarin and searches for AJ's hoof. It looks like somepony trying to fend off a swarm of angry dragonbees in slow motion and you feel a very inappropriate grin creeping up on the corners of your muzzle.
>One finger brushes against her cheek and he immediately latches on to her face with both hands. "... give you a firm handshake."
>AJ's eyes go wide as saucers for a second, but instead of shaking her violently around by the head, he strokes along her cheekbones and down her neck with both hands while kneeling down.
>The orange mare wastes no time and whips her hoof back and forth violently, directly in front of his nose.
>The complete lack of a reaction  on the human's part plasters a cheeky grin on her features "Knew it."
>Looks like you're not the only one who caught on quickly what's going on.
>"Yer blinder than a mole. Aint'cha, sugarcube?"
>"Muh sekrit. I've been debunked." Anonymous says with terrible histrionics "You better take responsibilty, Applejack-chan, uguu~--"
>The human flops to the ground, as if a bolt had struck him dead.
>Bewilderment overtakes the farmpony "What in tarnation?!"
>She positions herself on top of him and grabs hold of his head.
>A cold sweat breaks out all over your body, did she kill him? What just happened?
>You need to act fast.
>Within the second of AJ grabbing him, you teleport past a very confused Rainbow and directly next to the the prone human.
>First, your Ultrasonic Pressure Wave Detection Spell(tm), centered on his chest.
>The spell is cast and you can clearly see his his heart beating, Applejacks as well. It beats twice as fast as his.
>Is that normal? Can't exclude bradycardia. Maybe his bloodpressure is too low?
>You cast a modified ultra thin blanket barrier over his whole body, you feel no spasms, it's not a seizure.
"Step back, AJ. He might  have a pulmonary embolism or a blodclot wandered into his brain and caused a stroke. I'm gonna teleport us to the hospital."
>You whip around to Soarin "Is this normal? Does he have a known condition? Did he have something like this bef--"
>Your words are strangled as you see the Wonderbolt's expression. He rolls his eyes, utterly unamused. Trots over to Anonymous and kicks him in the sole of his foot "Get up, you're embarrassing."
>Applejack and you both take a step back as the would-be victim jerks up from the kick "I'm dying, only a pretty-pony kiss can revive me." he says dramatically, folds his hands on one side of his cheek and leans back with puckered lips, waiting.
>A glint in Soarin's eyes lights up and he jumps over the human's form, landing next to his face, hooves clapping ear-crunchingly against the boards of the station "Alright! Come 'ere, you!"
>Soarin goes in for the kiss!
>"NoooooOOO." but is stopped not a hair's breadth away from his goal.
>The stallion let's himself get pushed back, his target using all of his might to just get him off.
>Then he relaxes back onto the ground "One of the mares." he says innocently, smiling coyly.
>Rainbow steps forward, ominous grin splitting her face from one ear to the other "That can get arranged."
>"R-Really?" the human asks, suddenly all confidence gone from his voice.
>"Yeah. Just lean back and close your eyes." she assures him. The cyan mare turns around and flaps a bit up in the air "Matilda! Do you have a second?!"
>You snicker, but AJ just raises a brow as Cranky Doodle Donkey's wife looks at Dash in confusion.
>"No!" the human yells in sincere horror "I'm healed! A miracle!" and jumps off the ground onto his two feet.
>Hmm... what in the hay?
"Do you know Matilda, Anonymous?"
>"Just rumors." he deflects your question while straigthening out his shirt.
>Soarin sighs for you all to hear "Listen, I gotta warn you, girls."
>The groups attention shifts to the pale blue stallion, Dash stops snickering and AJ looks him in the eyes like a predator.
>"You better listen to him." the human adds "He's serious business when he sighs like that."
>The Wonderbolt stares you dead in the eyes "Get used to this, he's a clown."
>"You better stop listening to him." Anon corrects himself, his voice the exact same tone as in his previous sentence "You can't take anything he says serious when he's like that.".
>Soarin doesn't even acknowledge him, keeps eye-contact with you and cocks his head to the side slightly "See?"
>You get butt-bumped by Rainbow, as she whispers in your ear "I think we're gonna get along juuust fine." then immediately walks off to the train-stations only vending machine.
>"He does that often?" Applejack asks.
>Soarin looks tired "All the time."
>"Hey." Anon tries to butt in "Don't talk about me like I'm not here."
>"The first time the royal sisters interrogated him, he pulled the exact same number."
>You can only imagine how he got mercilessly chastised, a true miracle he still has any humor left.
"And? How did that go?"
>The stallion takes a deep, deep breath "Three seconds after he hit the ground, Luna had her tongue so far down his throat, she probably tasted his breakfast."
>Anon giggles "She stole my first kiss~"
>Your imagination takes over.
>The scene where the Princess of the Moon sincerely tries to save this human's life by kissing him...
>...!
>Lewd!
>A glance over to Applejack reveals a faint blush under her freckles and the tiniest sign of a suppressed grin in the corners of her muzzle.
>Rainbow comes back with two candybars for Anonymous and herself, looking confused at your expressions "Did I miss something?"
>She taps the human with the treat and he takes it "We were recalling my arrival in Equestria."
>"Dang it! Gimme a recap real quick, bro." she pleads.
"Come on, let's go to the castle, before the next two trains arrive."
>"Here." the pegasus mare squeezes herself between Anon and Soarin "Hold on to me." she says, rubbing herself against him.
>His hand finds itself resting comfortably on her shoulders, right in the back of her neck. It's a comfortable height for him, just barely above his hips.
>The group starts to move and Anon talks in between bites "Okay. So I arrived in my glowing white ball that dissipated into nothing. I was naked, faced with the two most powerful ponies of this world. I stepped up to Celestia and said, 'I need your horseboots, your crown, and your carriage.' She just said 'I don't do requests.' and we fought for three days and three nights. Of course she had to tap out and switched with Luna all the time, but it was the only way it was fair for them, so I allowed it."
>...
>He takes a bite of his candybar "Damn, I love honeyed hay."
>Can he even digest that?
>Rainbow looks at him with wide eyes "Go on." clearly fascinated.
>"Yeah. So. Turns out, Celestia is a dragonborn, and Luna a Kajheet."
>"Woah." Dash's ears perk up "What's that mean?"
>"I have no idea, but that's how they got me."
>He eats the rest of his snack, and soon your castle comes into view.
>"Sorry." the human says all of a sudden, his voice deflated somehow.
"Sorry for what?"
>"Prolly fer makin' a scene." AJ adds gritty.
>"That... too." he admits "My jokes are terrible."
"You don't need to apologize, you're not half the jester that Pinkie Pie is."
>You swear you can hear a silent 'Challenge accepted' from the big boy.
>"That's a mare I'd like to meet." he says.
>Rainbow swivels her head around "Trust me, you will. The only reason she's not all over you is 'cause she's on the far side of the country... not that this stopped her before..."
"It's okay. We'll help you get situated and have you meet everypony you need. Come, let's go inside."