Dear Twilight Sparkle,
Baphomet indeed seems a most fearsome foe. My solar magnifier does not seem to be affecting him. I cannot determine this for sure, my as direct observation of him would obviously have disastrous consequences. If you can destroy his arcane seals of infidelity and shame as you proposed, I urge you to do so as soon as possible. I do not want to have to take more severe measures, as despite its problems, I rather like Ponyville, and would rather see it continue existing.
I’m not sure how much more time I can give you though. If he attempts to travel to the next town, he’ll surely bring his entourage of innocent ponies with him, so the only thing I would be saving Equestria from is mere property damage. I can’t believe that this is the only solution. I know you have a better way. So please, Twilight Sparkle. I beg of you. Save my little ponies from Baphomet’s nightmare, and prevent him from finding Rainbow Dash at all costs. I know you can do it, Twilight. I believe in you.
Yours truly,
Princess Celestia
Spike stopped reading, with a grim look on his face. The other foals in the CMC clubhouse had paused in their work, to listen to him when a letter had burst out of his mouth. It was a letter for Twilight, but... well, it didn’t help to keep secrets at this point.
“The Princess is counting on us!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed in shock.
“Miss Twilight is counting on us!” Apple Bloom added, twirling the hammer in her hoof. “We gotta do this, and quick!”
“All of Ponyville is counting on us,” Dinky added, while buffing out the gears with his horn. “We need to get this right.”
They sang as they worked together on assembly and repair, to help the work go more quickly, and because Sweetie Belle thought up some sweet lyrics.
When you’re a younger pony Ponies don’t understand your needs. They get scared when you do what you want They won’t let you plant your seeds. But now on a day when all is lost We foals are needed by them all We have to win at any cost We have to make this demon fall! We’ll build a way to beat your game And end your dirty deeds! You’re the one who takes the blame When everypony’s free!
Coming rolling up the hill from Sweet Apple Acres was a peculiar sight. A pony riding in a sling hanging from some sort of wheeled wooden contraption, an orange foal with a grape colored mane who could have been mistaken for a filly if you didn’t know he was a colt. Hitched to the wheeled contraption were two genuine fillies, pulling it and him along like a cart. Scootaloo was sitting in back of it, in a seat that was like a hanging, cloth swing. Both Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom had thick blindfolds tied around their eyes, and two long reins travelling from them up to Scootaloo’s forehooves. With subtle tugs on the slim bits in their mouths, he held them steady on the road, as they headed straight for disaster.
Scootaloo called out commands as the others continued singing along.
When you’re a younger pony (go left!) When you are everything you can be Sometimes you can’t find your way (keep going!) Sometimes you just can’t see. But now we know what to do (turtle!) We won’t let anyone mistreat us We will never let this beat us We will never flee! (here comes the hill!)
Sweetie and Apple Bloom slid to a halt, rearing back as he tugged their bridles, while Scootaloo called out, “Woah! That’s close enough!” They dropped their bridles then, and his call of “Over here!” led them walking back to the sides of the wooden wheeled contraption. Singing urgently, they adjusted the direction Scootaloo was facing, hoping against hope that they were close enough, but not too close for the demon to notice them. They sang bravely, but it could all be destroyed if they were in the wrong place, or at the wrong time. In the end, it all came down to Scootaloo’s ability to plot a course.
Sometimes young and not so clever (turn left!) We won’t let you mistreat us Things like you will never beat us (little to the right!) Not now, not tomorrow, not ever! (perfect!)
There was some post-assembly, and Scootaloo couldn’t help. He just hung there, sweating bullets, looking out for any horny ponies who thought to come after them. Any ponies who found them probably wouldn’t strip the fillies of their blindfolds, but it would totally ruin their plans. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle fumbled their way along blindly, turning a winch that lifted a barrel of rocks higher and higher, finally putting the pin in, and locking it in place, the barrel weighing heavily on the rest of the assembly. It didn’t take eyes to do any of that thankfully, or magic for that matter, so there was no trouble for them to do that, and plenty of room for them to sing in defiance to the demon’s roars.
Your ties to this earth we will sever Back to the pit from which you came You will flee once you hear our name When you hear our voice proclaim Crusaders now, now and forever! (ready?) (ready!) We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders On a quest to find out who we are And we will never stop the journey Though our quest will take us far.
If the demon noticed them, he didn’t show it. Scootaloo tracked its hulking, mountainous form as he sang, bigger than anything he’d ever seen before. That made things a lot easier. The demon lumbered out of the way, but then began a slow, searching course back in the direction Scootaloo needed him to go. His friends were ready with their hooves, at either side of him. They couldn’t see anything, but they could hear his signal. Only a matter of calling it at the right time...
We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders And we will never give in We will never stop the journey We will never ever let you win! We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders On a quest to find out who we are And we will never stop the journey We’ll be riding on the farthest star We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders Cutie Mark Crusaders, yeah!
“Now!” Scootaloo shouted, and Apple Bloom yanked out the other pin out. Scootaloo tensed and spread his wings. He was not gonna enjoy this. The mechanical assembly tilted like a seesaw as the heavy barrel descended uncontested, pulling the rest of the arm with it. Scootaloo’s world sped up and slowed down in the peculiar way that it would do at times, as the cloth swing underneath him pulled him up and over with a dizzying, crushing acceleration, his small orange body straining against the creaking fabric, until with a crash the barrel hit home, and his butt left the swing behind, the air whistling through Scootaloo’s ears as he soared at incredible speeds, straight for it.
Ponies saw him coming, but they barely flew off the ground after him before he shot by them like an orange bullet. He was still cresting in his upward arc, but he wouldn’t overshoot the demon. He was right on target, actually. Scootaloo just hoped that when Twilight said to touch the thing, she didn’t mind if it was at high velocities. This was gonna hurt.
The demon saw him and roared, a greenish firey glow emanating from its mouth, but as large and lumbering as He was, Baphomet barely had time to turn before Scootaloo’s entire vision was encompassed by that scaly hide of oozing, ebony black, silently screaming scales.
Scootaloo hit with enough force to knock the demon sideways, a furious scream escaping him as it felt like he ran right into a brick wall. His hooves dug into the demon’s side and it felt as horrible as it looked, like the worst aspects of hot taffy and eggshells combined. A vile blackness blasted out of the demon’s mouth as it shuddered totally silently underneath Scootaloo. Several things happened very quickly at that point.
On the ground, Twilight heard before she saw the twinkling of her spell circle, still intact underneath all this rubble. Salt circles were much sturdier when they were locked in with a pending evocation. What looked like a column of solid black magic descended into the ground, vanishing into the spell circle as surely as Twilight had hoped it would. “He did it!” Twilight screamed, throwing the bookcase away as she gazed into the fray without fear. “We got him! He did it!”
Then, Baphomet’s penis fell off, crashing to the ground with a thundering note of terrible finality. Mr. Greenhooves was the only pony underneath the golden phallus at the time, but that’s okay, because luckily that was his fetish.
The third thing that happened was Twilight’s shrieks of joy were drowned out by the collective scream, as everypony in Ponyville all orgasmed at once.
Then, Baphomet caught on fire.
Scootaloo felt like he might have broke something, and not just the demon. He was hurting all over, and the demon was getting hotter ow, hot hot hot! Scootaloo leaped off the demon, his limbs screaming in pain even as the surface his hooves had just been on erupted into flames. The demon was huge. It was monstrous. It was higher than any of the houses! Scootaloo started to fall, and the ground seemed so very, very far away. “Help!” he shouted, as utter panic tore through him like lighting. “Somepony hel—” Suddenly, Rainbow Dash grabbed Scootaloo right out of the air.
“Rainbow Dash!” he exclaimed in breathless amazement. “You weren’t supposed to—”
“Hey, it’s not like I could leave you hanging,” she said cockily. “That was so awesome! How did you get speed like that? Scootaloo, you were flying!”
“Heh heh yea—” Scootaloo coughed. “Ow... I think I might have broke a rib.”
“I hate when that happens,” Rainbow Dash said grouchily. “Let’s get you to the ground. Twilight said everypony was going to be fine now.”
As Dash landed gently with Scootaloo on her back, Scootaloo asked her, “You saw me flying? Where were you?”
“We got stuck under a bookcase,” Rainbow Dash said dourly, “And Twilight still wouldn’t let me leave. I uh... don’t tell her, but I was peeking out a little when you did that amazing move.”
“Haha yeah I’ll...” Scootaloo’s relief trailed off to terrified staring, as he looked over Rainbow Dash’s shoulder. Then he shouted, “Seargent Sprinkles!! The (cough cough) demon is coming right for us!”
“Ohh buck,” Rainbow said, looking behind her. Baphomet was wreathed in flames, his scales like bubbling pitch, and he was still going! Specifically going after them!
“No, Dash!” a panicked Twilight Sparkle ran up to the fleeing duo, “I didn’t mean you! You’re not safe! Did you look at him? Oh dear Celestia, you did,”
“Darn it Twilight, what was I supposed to do?!” Dash replied angrily, “Wait for somepony to stop orgasming enough to—ugh, I think you might be ri—holy pumpernickle!” Dash went from irritation to surprise to outright alarm, as her nethers flared with a desire that straight out blew her mind. She felt like when the idol was about to impregnate her, but it hit her like, all at once! “Twilight, I think it got me!” she wailed. “What do I do?”
“Keep running!” Twilight said. “He can still tear you apart! You have to keep away long enough for me to gather the other unicorns of Ponyville. I have a plan!”
“What’s—auhh!” Dash tried to ask, but she stumbled and hunched in need. She couldn’t stop her tail from flagging, literally. She was having trouble walking because of the rippling, and the spreading and the empty feeling.
“It’s your body, trying to—trying to prepare for Him!” Twilight shouted. “You have to keep going!”
Even Scootaloo’s warm body against hers felt incredible, as Rainbow Dash sank cheek first into the dirt, hips piked up and legs spreading. An electric fire rippled through her, paralyzing her movements, her nethers clenching all on their own with a rhythm she knew well. It didn’t feel like evil demonic magic, not at all. It felt familiar and absolutely overwhelming. “Twilight, I am literally orgasming right now!” she squeaked desperately, clenching needily on what should have been a big, thick phallus filling her, stretching her, seeding her.
Rainbow Dash couldn’t even speak, just had to crouch there shuddering and give a low moan, as her cunt was sopping wet, and throbbing with power, and fucking stopping her in her tracks! She just had to stand there, spreading, hoping to get fucked, while the demon approached. Scootaloo slid off of her carefully, unable to stand on all four of his hooves. Dash should have been able to carry him. She couldn’t—she couldn’t think!
Rainbow Dash tried to stumble forward another few steps, tried not to be a complete failure, but another wave of rippling convulsions went through her passage, and stars were in her vision it felt so good. Wasn’t this demon supposed to keep you from orgasming? Dash didn’t know. She couldn’t stop! It felt like her cunt was a yawning chasm, taking her over from the legs up, like her whole body was all geared to be one giant fucking horse pussy!
Twilight Sparkle stood alone, her horn as bright as the sun as she put herself between Rainbow Dash and the demon. Baphomet had picked up his own golden phallus held in his smoking, withering, dripping arms, and one little unicorn seemed tiny as she defended what resembled her friend less and less as the seconds went on. There was no way she could stop Him on her own, not even for a second, but maybe she could employ some building materials to erect some kind of edifice ...in the next 10 seconds.
Baphomet charged.
“Gotcha covered, sugarcube!” came a familiar voice behind Twilight, as Twilight completely ignored the demon, turning in shock to see a frazzled, droopy-maned, drippy-reared Applejack hustle the limp Rainbow Dash on a wooden cart, and go galloping off with it at speeds that Pinkie Pie would have envied.
“Nononono let me fuck hiiiiiiii” came Rainbow Dash’s panicked wail, fading to silence as Applejack vanished over the hill, but Dash’s compulsion to submit to the demon was easily ignored. The maladaption effect to make the bride helpless as a babe didn’t discriminate if it was the demon dominating her, or Applejack taking her away from what she thought was her heart’s desire. So there was nothing Rainbow Dash could do but be carted away from it.
Twilight just stared after them numbly, as the flaming demon charged past her and Scootaloo, utterly ignoring the two of them for the fleeing figure of Applejack carrying His bride. Building fragments fell out of the air as her horn flickered and the aura around it faded. Twilight stared at what was unfolding before her. And somehow a smirk made its way onto her face. From there, a grin, and a nervous laugh bubbling up in her chest.
“He... He has no chance,” she tried to explain to a confused Scootaloo, as Twilight fought to keep it together. It was just so hilarious, though! She didn’t think poorly of her friends, honestly she didn’t. But the demon was going to be bested by... “He can’t possibly outrun her,” Twilight crowed, “Baphomet is being defeated by A–Applejack’s magic powers of running really fast!”
“I...” Scootaloo stopped blinking at Twilight and sank his head wearily, laying there on the ground like a discarded toy. “I don’t even know,” he said heavily.
“Right well, I’m sorry but I have to go. Applejack’s buying us time, and I think I know of a way to rid the world of this demon once and for all,” Twilight said confidently. “Just ask somepony else to um...”
“I’ll be fine,” Scootaloo mumbled, face first in the dirt. Twilight galloped off without another word.
After some time, Scootaloo heard a familiar voice ask, “Are you okay, filly?”
“Oh, hi miss Lily,” Scootaloo said, resisting his urge to, for once, lift his own tail, if for no other reason than to show everypony what they keep missing. He looked up to see a pink furred, blonde mare with her namesake as a cutie mark, looking down on him with concern.
“Scootaloo?” she asked sweetly, a measure of discalm spreading over her face. “Did you get caught in... that, too?” she asked, a guilty expression on her face as she pressed her tail against her tellingly slimy rump.
“Not really,” he replied cautiously. “Miss Twilight was using me to stop it.”
“The librarian?” Lily asked uncomprehendingly.
“She’s a lot more than a librarian,” Scootaloo responded wryly. “Listen, have you seen Sweetie Belle or Apple Bloom?” He stood with difficulty, his muscles flaring painfully as they felt like he’d just hit a demon at about 56 miles per hour. “I need to find them again, and let them know it worked.”
“Were we really just... did that just happen?” Lily asked stepping as if uncertain of her own rump.
“It was a monster’s spell,” Scootaloo replied. “You need to ask miss Twilight if you want the details.”
“So it wasn’t... I didn’t really... it was an illusion?” she asked hopefully.
Scootaloo looked around, at the confused and weary ponies stumbling here and there, with messy groins and faces. “I don’t think so,” he said, “I’m pretty sure it really happened.”
“B-b-but it can’t have happened!” Lily said with fright. “I was lifting my tail for—for everypony!”
“It was the demon’s spell,” Scootaloo said patiently. “It made you do that, to feed His powers.”
“But you don’t understand!” Lily protested fearfully, “He finished inside me!”
Scootaloo patiently said—wait.
“Uh oh,” Scootaloo said, looking uneasily at all the many ponies walking around, with a lot more concern than he did before.
Lily gallopped off heedless of his reaction, shouting, “Rose! Rose, where are you?” And that left Scootaloo to his own devices... again. He limped back through town, the air still shattered with the sound of the beast’s distant roars. Could nothing stop this thing?! He didn’t know. He did everything he could, and he was just... needed to find his friends. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw them. They were still there when he got back to the trebuchet, huddled together with their backs to it for some amount of defense, still wearing their blindfolds. Scootaloo guessed they didn’t know yet.
“It’s okay, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle,” Scootaloo said to the two of them, “You can take off your blindfolds now.”
“Ah still hear ‘im!” Apple Bloom shouted out unconvinced, but Scootaloo said,
“No, it really did get him, and it totally worked. He’s just still not... dead yet. But the spell is broken, and everypony is... normal again.”
As he helped them to their hooves, and Apple Bloom stripped off her blindfold, looking around, Scootaloo explained, “He went chasing after Rainbow Dash, after her groin like... exploded or something. Miss Twilight said she had a plan, but I... I couldn’t really keep up with either of them. So I dunno, but—” he was cut off by another roar, “Whatever they’re doing is making Him awfully mad.”
“So, it worked?” Sweetie Belle asked, stripping off her blindfold, while Apple Bloom looked at Scootaloo with concern. “We actually did it?”
“Scootaloo, you’re hurt!” Apple Bloom interrupted, trotting up to him and looking at his shaky stance worriedly.
“It’s alright, I just hit the thing really hard,” Scootaloo said, trying not to speak too loud because coughing was kind of painful right now. “Still, I probably should go to the clinic again, just so the orphanage ponies don’t worry.”
“Why don’t you get in the sling?” Sweetie suggested. “We can take you there with it!”
“Good idea, Sweetie!” Apple Bloom said brightly, just as Scootaloo said the same thing, but tiredly.
Apple Bloom helped him up into the trebuchet’s giant sling and he kind of sat there, still dazed by the fact that it went so very well. There were so many ways that could have gone wrong, now that Scootaloo had a moment to think about it. He just hoped what he did was enough for Miss Twilight to finish it off. At the hospital, the nurse ponies told Scootaloo what he already knew, that he had some contusions (that’s doctor speak for bruises), third degree burns on his hooves, and a broken rib. They also said he had a minor fracture in his ulna, and a bit of a concussion, but with a good night’s rest, he should be right as rain in the morning.
Of course it was hard to sleep with the monster still bellowing, but after a big bright light and an explosion, that cut off pretty quickly, in terrible crashes of finality, that made the whole building shake.
Then all was quiet. Scootaloo hoped it had gotten defeated at least, but he had to lay there worried as the minutes ticked by, until finally Apple Bloom burst in shouting, “They defeated—!”
Apple Bloom caught herself in the dimly lit hospital room, and held up a hoof, saying more quietly, “They defeated it, Scootaloo.”
“Swell,” Scootaloo sighed in relief. “Glad I—ow—didn’t get stuck in bed for no reason.”
“You woulda loved it, Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom cheered, as Sweetie Belle squeezed in behind her, followed by Dinky Dew and Spike. “It was like raaaargh and they were like oh yeah? Kaboom! and whoosh, and bam and—”
“I think I might be a better candidate for explaining things,” came the voice of a certain smarmy lilac librarian.
“Oh... yeah, kinda,” Apple Bloom said blushing, and stepping aside.
Twilight Sparkle poked her head into Scootaloo’s hospital room above the fillies, and smiled upon seeing Scootaloo. “Scootaloo, you have no idea how glad I am that you... found a way to defeat the beast,” she said. “You and your friends succeeded where everypony else could not, broke His spell over the town, and made Him vulnerable. I just want to say that I am so, so grateful what you did, and how many ponies you saved.”
Her smile dropped out then and she exclaimed in a very aggravated tone, “But did you have to do it by firing yourself at him with a trebuchet?”
“But did...” Scootaloo paused to catch his breath. “How did you defeat it?” he asked. “Is it ...dead?”
“Yes uh... we certainly weren’t going to try reforming a beast like that,” Twilight said a little guiltily. “Sometimes you just have to do what’s needed to save the world.”
“But He is dead, right?” Sweetie Belle asked worriedly.
Twilight nodded quickly at her and smiled, saying, “Yes, He is. Dead as a doornail. He won’t be bothering anypony ever again. Don’t worry, we won’t get in trouble for it. The princess has already issued official pardons for our actions as civilian vigilantes.”
Scootaloo blinked. He hadn’t thought about the getting in trouble aspect of it. He rarely did, but wow. Dead like, completely dead? Like not going to come back for revenge dead? That was pretty hard core. “How did...” he asked hesitantly. “I didn’t get to see. How did you... destroy Him?”
“Oh, well I don’t mean to brag,” Twilight said bashfully, “But I am pretty good at organizing things. What we did was gather all of the Ponyville unicorns together, and combined our magic into a sort of larger evocation, greater than any of us could have cast on our own. A mega-evocation, if you will. It was certainly more than enough to do away with the demon.”
“So you made a... huge explosion that... that obliterated Him?” Scootaloo asked, wincing at the pain of talking too hard, but seriously getting excited over the cool story that Twilight was telling.
“We... really should let you get your rest,” Twilight said with an embarassed hoof scraping the floor. “I’m sure you can find out about it from your friends, and the rest of the town and um...”
“But I really wanna... know,” Scootaloo said eagerly. “Please, miss Twilight!”
“Well...” Twilight glanced around at nothing in particular, then looked at Scootaloo, saying, “The explosion was actually just a side effect of magically tearing a building from its foundations. The way we defeated the demon is, while Applejack kept the demon occupied with Rainbow Dash, we worked together to collectively levitate the Ponyville clock tower...”
Twilight Sparkle waved a hoof in a circle, trailing off, seeming at a loss to find the right words.
“...then we beat Him to death with it.”
Dear Princess Celestia,
The demon has been defeated and the town is saved, thanks in large part to the actions of some brave if foolish foals and their trebuchet. I know we’ve done nothing wrong in defeating such a thing, but I can’t help but think this situation could have been avoided if we had acted differently. If ponies weren’t so unfriendly to each other about sexuality, then seedy organizations like the Happy Happy cult wouldn’t be able to take advantage of desperate mares afraid to trust their friends.
Ponies really do idolize you to an unhealthy level, and I’m sure you’re familiar with their literature, but this is bordering on, no definitely exploitive. Ponies are using your good name to hurt others. I know I’ve said this before, but I really hope you agree that sort of thing cannot be tolerated. Ponyville is a powder keg of repression, exactly the sort of place where a demon would thrive. It is vital that we educate these ponies, and keep them from forcing ignorance on each other.
So I would like to formally request a higher position of authority in the town, if just on a temporary basis. I know how important a pony’s self-determination is, but as a royal librarian there’s not much I can do to help curb some of this exploitation. In particular, there are 17,359 mares right now who are in desperate need of emergency contraception, otherwise Ponyville will be in a lot more trouble when spring comes around next year.
Thank you for considering my request, and I’m sorry it had to come to this, but the Ponyville problem has grown too great to solve from behind the scenes. I can’t educate ponies who have already been taught that the library is evil.
Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
With cautious satisfaction in her breast, Twilight returned her quill to its inkwell, and rolled up the letter with a protective seal. “Spike!” she called out, trotting around the recently reorganized ruins of her haven of books, the letter twinkling in her magic as it followed her around. “Spiiike,” she called again, before remembering that her number one assistant was out playing with Dinky and Sweetie Belle, over at Rarity’s as usual.
Twilight Sparkle brought the unsent letter floating in her magic before her face, and glared at it. A thoughtful look came across her then, and a blush tinted her cheeks. “Well, maybe just this once,” she said indulgently, holding the letter before her and, “HEY Twilight!” Rainbow Dash shouted, swooping eagerly in through the ceiling to land before the librarian.
Well, that certainly was one way to send a letter.
Twilight coughed weakly in the smoky aftermath, and of course Rainbow Dash saw her completely disintegrate the thing in shock. But really, it wasn’t so bad if Dash saw it, considering what happened to her and all. Twilight still made a mental note to pen another copy for Spike to send, in case hers ended up in Saddle Arabia or something.
“Oh uh, sorry,” Dash said, wide eyed at Twilight. Twilight tried not to wilt at her friend’s surprise, as Rainbow Dash said honestly, “Your magic is pretty freaky, you know that?”
“Yes I’m... aware,” she replied. “So, what brings you here?”
“Just wanted to tell you I’m all better,” Rainbow Dash said, flipping up her wings and puffing out her chest. “I started to feel better as soon as you clocked that thing in the head, but I did my routine today and I wanted to let you know that I’m back up to speed!”
“That’s great, Rainbow Dash!” Twilight said with a smile. “I know it was awkward when you didn’t... recover as quickly the second time, without the demonic magic to sustain it.”
“Boy is that an understatement,” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes.
“Ah don’t get it, Rainbow Dash,” Applejack said irritably, as shortly after the demon’s demise, she trotted slowly along with the cart rolling behind her. “Why was the demon after you? And why are you so... funny-like?”
“You’d have to ask Twilight I dunno,” Rainbow Dash said, staring at the clouds from where she lay in the bed of the cart. “I’m just glad they killed the thing.”
“Was he really gonna,” Applejack looked back at Dash, then blushed, facing fixedly forward again. “Doesn’t look like you’da had much trouble taking his big gold member, is all,” she said noncomittally.
“Yeah but, then he was gonna... eat me, or something,” Rainbow replied, lifting her hoof to adjust uncomfortably the loose folds hanging around the cavern that her marehood had become. It didn’t even feel that good to touch. It felt all thin and spread out. “Twilight said I should get better from this. I just wish I’d known about it before I went and created that thing.”
“You created that thing?” Applejack said skeptically. “How the hay did you screw up that badly?”
“Let’s just say I’m gonna go to the library next time, instead of trusting strange, stone idols,” Dash replied wryly. “I’m just glad that thing’s out of me, and gone for good.”
“Whattya mean outta you?”
Rainbow Dash blushed and stuttered, “W-well it’s how you create the demon. Somepony tricks you into keeping this stone idol around, and it makes you really freaking horny. And then you uh, give birth to a demon.”
Applejack’s hooves stuttered to a halt. She turned and looked at Rainbow Dash incredulously, saying, “You’re saying that you gave birth to that thing?”
“Sorta,” Rainbow Dash admitted, “It was a lot easier than real birth. It only took like... a week, maybe less. I kind of lost track of time after a while.”
“Why didn’t you warn anypony?” Applejack asked. “Why didn’t you get help?”
“W-well I thought I could handle it,” Rainbow Dash lied. “H-hardly even noticed, really.”
“How the hayfires did you not notice that thing inside of you?” Applejack blurted out. “How the hay did you fit in you?”
“It wasn’t that big when it came out, I swear!” Dash replied desperately.
“It was the size of town hall!” Applejack countered glaring untrustingly at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash crossed her arms, grumbling, “Okay, fine, I did notice, but by the time I did notice, I couldn’t move anyway.”
“This thing was paralyzin’ you?” Applejack asked curiously.
Rainbow blushed again, saying, “No I uh... I was too fat.”
“...too fat,” Applejack said, a blank look on her face.
“This conversation never leaves this cart,” Rainbow Dash mumbled, covering her face with her forehooves.
“But I grew stronger every day,” Rainbow Dash continued proudly for her librarian friend. “Closed up tight as a drum. You could bounce a coin off my ass. Go ahead, try it! I swear it’s true!”
“That’s... okay,” Twilight said, holding up an arm to push back the proffered bit coin in her friend’s hoof. “I’m just glad you’re feeling better.”
“Sure is nice to be back to normal,” Rainbow Dash said happily, turning and looking around at the library’s sunny interior, just in love with life right now. “I really thought that demon was going to do something seriously bad to me, like the kind of thing I couldn’t get better from. But every time something happened, I got better, and now I’m back in action. I can fly, and buck clouds with the best of them, and Blossomforth is still totally into me, even if Rainy Feather doesn’t like me anymore on account of I y’know, got her pregnant sort of, indirectly.”
“I really wish we could have gotten more mares to consent,” Twilight said sadly, “But Celestia was very clear on the order that we could only force ponies not to pressure her to keep the foal, rather than just forcing her to abort. I was pretty happy with the numbers we got though. Once mares learned there really would be nopony condemning them, and it was completely anonymous, there were very few who listened to what” she ground her teeth and said, “Pastor Tightbottom told them to do.”
“Yeah, well it’s great if she wants to keep it, but she still isn’t talking to me,” Rainbow sighed, “And Blossomforth is... she really needs a mare to show her the ropes about mares. I kind of like helping her figure it out. But you’d be amazed how flexible she is. Did you know she can lick her own—”
“Anyway!” Twilight replied curtly. “It’s good you’re feeling better. I just want you to know I completely support you in this, and I think you’re just as good as you were before, even if your wings are a little... different now.”
“What about my wings?” Rainbow asked, sudden worry going through her, because they must have been a mess. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d preened them. She looked at one of them self consciously, seeing a brilliantly sky blue fleshy canvas, folded alongside her body. As her wings snapped to shocked attention, they expanded in slim digits she’d never had before, between which a leathery membrane stretched, with not a single feather to be seen.
> Be Rainbow Dash<i>
Rainbow Dash was a cloud, for a...while, until she managed to pull herself together. The nondescript cloud that was totally just a cloud and not a pony hiding inside of it and crying. She hadn’t even noticed but now that she did, her wings were so freaking different. It was... kind of fascinating actually. The bony part of her wing had expanded into four... hooflike things? They felt like hooves, except that they were long and thin, spreading from the tip of her wing like an unfolding ship’s sail.
She couldn’t believe she was looking at her own wing. The beautiful blue feathers were all gone, replaced with this ugly... skin sail thing. She found she could move each hoof-stick individually, but all she did was fold her wings against her body, and go back to crying.
“Rainbow Dash!” came the faint sound of Rainbow’s librarian friend from far below. What? But Rainbow was hiding!
She stuck her head out of the cloud and shouted down at Twilight, “How did you know it was me?”
“Your tail is still hanging out!” Twilight called up from below.
Rainbow Dash yanked her tail into the cloud’s comforting confines and curled up again, rubbing at her eyes fiercely, and trying to ignore that anypony knew where she was.
“Rainbow Dash, I need you to come back to the library!” Twilight shouted back at her. “I want to tell you what happened to you! You do not have bat wings! Rainbow, I’m not going to shout this in front of the whole town! Please, come to the library!”
Rainbow Dash didn’t answer, and when Twilight trotted away, Dash sulked. Rainbow couldn’t believe she was stupid enough to think she’d gotten better. Her wings were all... completely wrong, and different, and she didn’t know what they were, even. Or what she was, even. Could she even call herself a pegasus? What good was a pegasus without feathers? What was she, a bat-asus? Why did this happen to her?!
At last, Rainbow had no choice but to go to the library. There was just so much she didn’t know, and any hope at all that Twilight could fix this was enough to drive Rainbow Dash out of her cloud and soaring back to the treebrary. She wanted to die of embarassment, flying across town like this. She’d been doing this for days now. Everypony had seen what happened to her wings... except her. Why hadn’t anypony said anything? Heck Blossomforth said she loved her wings! Was she just... lying? Rainbow looked around for anypony staring, but didn’t see anypony, and actually these wings were really quiet the way the air glided around them, so maybe ponies just didn’t know she was there.
And now that Rainbow Dash thought about it, she could feel the air gliding over her entire wing, not just indirectly, through how it brushed past her insensitive feathers. How had she not noticed this before? These wings were seriously creepy. Seriously, what was going on here? Why was she... this?
“Well, technically you’re part demon, now,” Twilight explained handily, when a red-faced Rainbow Dash sulked back into her library and completely failed to provide any sort of coherent argument, beyond frantic stuttering and confusion.
“Demonic magic is severely corruptive, and transformative,” Twilight continued. “That’s why it’s so dangerous to use. Eventually there’s nothing left of the user, beyond what the demonic magic has made of them. It’s not your fault, and there’s nothing wrong with you. You just... have a little bit more to deal with, that’s all.”
“I don’t want to deal with this,” Rainbow Dash said angrily. “I want my feathers back!”
“You... you can recover from this,” Twilight said conservatively. “Many... ponies who have been victims of demonic magic have lived completely normal, productive lives. There are therapies that can assist in recovering what you... used to be like, but it can take years of dedicated effort. I should know. I uh—read a lot of... books.”
“Years?” Rainbow Dash complained pertinently.
“This is why you don’t make pacts with demons, or trust shady individuals and strange idols,” Twilight stated frankly. “Demonic magic is just so darned contagious. One slip, and you have an altered body, or mind, and... well... you’re honestly lucky that your wings are all that changed, considering how much you did slip.”
“How is having wings like this lucky?” Dash moaned, staring at the weird... crescent shaped things.
Twilight took her words literally of course, the unicorn tapping her chin thoughtfully and saying, “Well, for instance your vagina may have remained permanently as large as it got, when, you know...”
“Point taken,” Dash grumbled.
“So,” Twilight said uncomfortably, “I had thought you knew, but I suppose I can give you the summary. For the most part it shouldn’t affect your life at all. As a legal demon, you’ll have to register of course, and you might be ineligible for some occupations.”
Rainbow Dash’s head snapped up at that, and she squeaked, “Wait, I can’t join the Wonderbolts?!”
“No no, that’s fine,” Twilight reassured Rainbow Dash, to her great relief, “Your stunt flying should be perfectly fine. For your particular demonism, I’d say you probably won’t be working as a marriage counselor any time soon.”
“Why’s that then?” Rainbow said a little caught off guard. Why would Twilight even suggest that Rainbow Dash’d ever want to do something like that?
“Rainbow, you’re a succubus,” Twilight told her patiently.
“Okay... rude,” Rainbow Dash shot back.
Twilight blinked. “What?” she asked cluelessly.
“I don’t suck anypony’s bus,” Rainbow Dash replied. “What are you even talking about?”
Twilight’s eyes dawned in recognition and she relaxed. “It’s a name for a demonism,” she said, “There are many ways demons use, or produce sexual energy. Succubi, the plural of succubus, are a type of demon who gain power from the act of receptive sex. Considering your particular... experience, the chance that you landed with anything other than that is pretty moot.”
“So, what’s that mean? I’m good at estrus now?” Rainbow asked in confusion, rubbing a hindleg against the other.
“That’s one way to put it,” Twilight said uncertainly, “Succubi don’t become marriage counselors, because generally the job of those counselors is to get the couple fucking each other, not the marriage counselor.”
“Oh, so—”
“Yes, a love demon gains power from other ponies having sex, but a sex demon is a more er, participatory role.” Twilight levitated a book out from one of the recently righted shelves, looking at it. Your body and You, by—and then Twilight floated it back onto the shelf.
“Think of it like a free performance boost, I guess?” Twilight Sparkle said with a cagey smile on her pretty lilac face.
Rainbow started to nod, but an ear twitched at something she’d heard, and she said, “Wait, doesn’t that count as performance enhancing magic?”
“Yes, it does. Why—oh,” Twilight’s expression went flat again, then frowning dourly.
“I could get disqualified from racing!” Rainbow declared to the brooding unicorn, still in fear and frustration.
“The Element of Loyalty also qualifies as performance enhancing magic, you know,” Twilight said pensively.
Rainbow Dash blanched at that, stuttering, “B-but I had that since—”
“And a zap pregnancy,” Twilight added.
Rainbow Dash blinked. “What the hay is that?” she asked, cocking her head at Twilight.
Twilight smiled sympathetically and lay a hoof on Rainbow Dash’s shoulder, saying, “A zap pregnancy is what happens when a mare consumes large amounts of Zap Apple jam while pregnant.”
Dash still didn’t understand though. “So, what does that have to do with me?” she asked.
Twilight’s gentle expression halted, and she removed her hoof, placing it on the ground and saying, “...never mind. You’re fine. Just report diligently, and they can check before the race to make sure you aren’t stuffed full of sex magic, er, figuratively speaking that is.”
Twilight turned to look to the ceiling, rubbing her chin and musing to herself, “Actually, would that be figurative or literal...?”
“Well—I can’t be a... a demon like that thing,” Rainbow Dash said firmly, the memories of that horror still fresh in her mind. “It made me really good at sex. Like really, really good at sex. And now I’m not, so I can’t be a demon anymore. I mean seriously, you shoulda seen those ponies. They were going to town on me like I was the only bicycle in Equestria.
Twilight winced at that, saying, “Er, if it continues to be that bad, you might have a problem... you weren’t consciously seducing them, were you?”
Dash paused. “Not really,” she said, “Does that make a difference?”
“If it’s passive, then it must have been temporary,” Twilight replied.
“Why’s that?” Dash asked curiously.
“Because I’m feeling no urge to fuck you right now,” Twilight replied, rolling her eyes.
Dash’s lower lip quivered and she turned away, before muttering, “...rude.”
“Stop pouting. You’re perfectly fine,” Twilight chided her. “What happened to you back then was the fourth circle demon’s effect. And you are only barely demonized. You shouldn’t have nearly the same influence over others, even if you try.”
“Well... what if it gets worse?” Rainbow Dash asked worriedly. “I want my feathers back. I don’t want to make it—worse.”
“I’ll be happy to forward you the literature on it,” Twilight stated, “It’ll tell you what behaviors to avoid. I’m not too familiar with the succubus aspect of demonism, but if I recall, actually having sex is not one of those behaviors to avoid. Most demonic magic is actually more about... being mean to others, than having sex persay. Such as having sex with somepony past the limits of their endurance and seriously hurting them, or having sex with a stallion, specifically for the purpose of your climax, then leaving him unsatisfied.”
Dash tried to ignore the warmth in her nethers at this talk about sex, and having sex with a stallion (except not leaving him unsatisfied). For all that her week under that thing’s influence was a blur, she was starting to remember all the sex she’d had, and it had been a lot more... incredible than she’d thought it would be. Could she do that now, have sex with a stallion without just feeling dirty and used for it? Rainbow Dash really wasn’t sure she wanted to find out, because then she might get pregnant again. Her friend seemed to know everything about this though.
“How do you know so much about this, anyway?” Rainbow asked curiously.
“Well, the Canterlot library lent me many texts on demons to research how to defeat Baphomet,” Twilight said cagily.
Dash squinted at her, though. “Yeah, about demons,” she said, “But what about demon... pony things? Like what I uh... am.”
Twilight blushed at that saying, “Er, well, I read about that in a book too?” she replied. “I uh... I read a lot of books.”
“Quick, what’s the unladen speed average of the 731st chapter of the Wonderbolts?” Rainbow Dash asked without humor.
Twilight was justifiably puzzled at that, tilting her head uncomprehendingly. “I don’t... know?” she responded.
“But it’s in a book!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed throwing her hooves up dramatically, “You read about that too, didn’t you?”
Twilight growled, “I can’t read every... book, fine. I’m part demon too, okay? Happy?”
Rainbow smiled smugly. “Yeah, I thought—wait, what?”