The MLP Chronicles, Chapter 8 [HD]- The Final Bout

> One wall to cover all;

> One wall to tower;

> One wall to show its might,

> And show mortals how to cower.

-----

> This past week, like any other time you’ve attempted to reflect on, has been decently hectic.

> You would think this is some sort of ridiculously long story blathered in a droning fashion from some kid trying to prove a point; yet, here you are, in the musty old thinking chair inside your house.

> Ever since you left the moon, the royal palace of Artemare had undergone a small uproar; it may or may not have some connection with the pandemonium with Vinyl Scratch at the party, who perished in the incident.

> It may also involve Luna sleeping with Twilight, her horn in questionable places.

> Totally not related to you, of course.

> Another issue was that there were two people dressed in those leather coats were attempting to break into your lunar residence there; the people in question, Prince Blueblood and shockingly Cheerilee, were both detained…

> And are now gone, the only traces of their presence being a cold trail of blood.

> Since your time back here, you can’t help but feel nervous, paranoid again; it’s as if someone far worse than Fluttershy is following your every move now, and you keeping turning around to find your own shadow.

> Are you turning insane? That’s rhetorical; you’ve proven without a doubt that you are clinically mad- you’re in Equestria, enough is said.

> Even now, as you sit in your unlit room, you feel something watching you; its midafternoon, and the brightness of daylight filters into your living room, yet shadows casted from random objects appear alive to you, quietly observing.

> You’re afraid to even go to the bathroom.

> You refuse to use the technology you had in here to “secure” yourself; you’ve personally asked Princess Celestia to lock it in the vault with the Elements of Harmony, in which she enthusiastically accepted.

> However, for whatever reason, you decided to not mention the Box of Wonders, your dirty little secret.

> You really miss Fernando and his manwhoring ways, the way he seductively grinds your grandfather clock.

> It’s ticking noise is prominent, how each and every second is recorded into its existence;

> Tick,

> Tock,

> Tick,

> Tock.

> You grit your teeth sideways, keeping pace with the clock as you decide what to do;

> This is exactly how you’ve dedicated each and every day for the past week.

-----

> Suddenly, your mind snaps, after seven full days of patience wearing thin from waiting for some sort of overelaborated plot point to occur;

> You have been waiting for Death to appear in an attempt to kill you, and he’s been ignoring you all this time; it’s like he has no interest in to after you bucked the heck out of Rainbow.

> What is he, a pony-virgin killer? Was that his bloody problem with you?

> Perhaps he has a passion for vengeance after having a bad breakup with a mare centuries ago, and he’s simply too egotistical to get over it!

> And what about this so-called “Evil League”, oh ho, how terrifying! Beyond Vinyl Scratch’s near fatal attack, you’ve seen nothing but jack squat for their motive of wanting to kill you;

> Why the banana-raping reason did they want to do you in, anyhow? Do THEY also have some diabolical scheme that had you as a snag in it?

> Because, quite frankly, you could have been asked to move out, and you sure as balls would have been happy to oblige, if it meant you didn’t have to deal with these-

> These cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit they are!

> Your mind heaves in rage as you exit your chair, leaving it for the first time in about four hours.

> The imprint of your back is still in it, slowly regaining its form within seconds; chuckling at this old fashion version of memory foam, you humbly return back into rage mode.

> You’re going for a walk, and don’t you dare let anyone or thing get in your way!

> You walk up to the door, bolts still in place, and you push the button to unlock it;

> It refuses to work.

> Brain: “Hey pal, long time, no talk! Remember that part where you turned in all that technology? Yeah, about that… that included the security mechanism, pal. *trollface*”

> Cursing in a brilliant and colorful tongue, you kick at the door a few times, and attempt to wrench open the poles, to no avail.

> You walk into the kitchen, open up your fridge, and pull out the first thing you see;

> Walking back into the living room, you fling a half full bottle of vodka with enough lethal intent that you’re actually shocked that all it did was explode at the steel with a shatter of glass and the sweet nectar.

> A thousand people in Russia passed away at the drop of their precious alcohol wasted in vain.

-----

> Now in a very flustered mood, you point at the door in a way only Phoenix Wright should.

“Gnome- blow DOWN THAT DOOR!”

> “…”

> Brain: “Hey bud, me again, remember when I-“

> UGH!

> In the last act of desperation, you look for another exit, and you find yourself looking mischievously at the window.

> Meanwhile, Fluttershy, having come to find your corpse after not being seen nor heard of for almost a week now, is now at the edge of your front lawn.

> Having a basket of untainted bread and other sweets, she has come to nurture you and chastise you for not spending more time with your friends.

> However, with hundreds of gnomes, all staring blankly at the front gate, she can’t help but feel timid at the sight, her last encounter almost leading to her demise.

> Setting the basket down, she attempts to work persuasion with the menacing group.

> “Oh, hi, guys. I’m just, uhm, trying to take care of Anon, you see… he’s been gone for a long time and I was getting worried he might not be getting out of the house enough, and I-!”

> Without a need for an introduction, you launch yourself out of your single front window, screaming a battle cry indistinguishable to you or Fluttershy.

> You get up, brush yourself of glass, and roar to the world to show whose back in action.

“GRUUUUUUAAAAAAHHHHH!”

> “Oh, my.”

> Your vision gaining a slight red tint, you find the now useless army of gnomes mockingly guarding your front lawn, all placed equally apart.

> Oddly enough, there’s a small berth of space for you to travel to the main stone pathway to your gate, as if the little cretins knew you would take this route out.

> You stomp over to the said pathway and pick up the nearest one.

“You little fuckwads, you think you’re soooo smart and cute, well I have news for you shorty!”

> You swear its eyes glisten at you, as if it’s daring you to speak your mind; you continue with your rant anyways.

“Oooh, wook at me, I’m the icon of a mother-making travel agency! I think I’m sooo cool with my big red pointy HAT!”

> “Anon, I really don’t think you should be talking about-“

“Who said that? WHO SAID THAT?!”

> Totally missing Fluttershy, who’s watching the scene with wide eyes, you search for the most suspicious gnome around.

> You spontaneously spot him; gnome #45, he sits a bit farther down the path, blatantly ignoring your presence, and very cockily is posed fifteen degrees to the right.

“You.”

> You point at it with the look of bloody murder, and it continues to disregard you.

> With the force of a rampaging bull, you charge forward and swing your leg with the intensity of a thousand suns, launching it into a spiraling motion into the air.

> After getting quite some distance, it crashes into a tree, exploding into a hundred shards of ceramic.

> “Anon…!”

> You go to sweep the next nearest one into oblivion when they abruptly all shift to face you.

> Freezing on the spot, you feel a chill go up your spine with their cold focus lazily gazing at you; their smiles, preluding, are causing anxiety to build into you.

> You swear you hear dark ominous Latin music playing in the background as the following words are muttered:

 

> “W͖̮̭̝̏͐̋͆͊̎͒ͧ̏ẻ̮̠̯͉̥̲̟̪̑̆ͦͩ̇͒͑͘ ̶̠̺̜ͥͩͯ̋̂͛̑ͤͫ͞ͅd̃ͥ͆̋͡҉̭͇̱͡ò͕͖ͨ̾̕͘ͅ ̛̼̻͙͉̓ͭͮ͛̇ͅn̢̠̪̺̲̩̟̯͗̏̂ͬͦo͛̓ͪͦͣ͂ͣ͗̀҉͓͉̻̖͈t͙̳̯̪͉͇̬̳̃ͦ̌͝ ̢̨̙͙̗̫̹͍̞ͯ̏́ͥͫê̯̜̯͕̞̹̔́a̜͇̙͈̙̽̏̚ẗ͔͚̫̲̟̼̭͔ͭͤ̃̈ͩ̋ͮ̀̚͢͢;̸̪͕̼̈́̑͟͢ ̨͙͊͂̏͠w̧͌ͯ̑̋͏͓̤̜̰͚͍͚̹e̥͙͌̔̎͊ͣ̇͌ ̶̷̟̦̟̝̻̳͔̗ͤ͌͋̏ͪ̇͋d͔̩̗̮̯̿̽̓̐͑̒ͯ̍͡o͎̞͕͚̲̰͔̙͐ͯ̎̇̿̉̒̈́̀͟ ̂̽҉̢̛̦̭̮̻n̗͍͓̟̙͕͗ͦ̎o̶̢̡̭̘̟͉̾͋ͧ̑ͯ̓ͥͮ̿t̷̺̘͇̭ͤ͋̄͠ ̴̥͔͂͂͐sͪͮ͞͏̳̣̖̠̖͡ļ̶͎͔̰͚̼͑͛̂̚͞ͅe̍́ͣ̇ͮͯͭ͒҉͓̲͍̙̺̠̬ḛͥ̉̆͗ͤͧ͋͋̓̕p̴̫͕̥̬̾̐̓ͫ̐͒͝;̯̮̟̦̺̗͉̝̱̍͗͋̈́̆ͫ͛̓̀ ̨̼̳̮̖ͫ͘ẁ̸͎̖̟̣̜̟ͮe̸̙̻̰͙͖̱̻͇ͪ͛̏ͮͯ͛͞ ̛̲͐ͬͩ̏͐̓̚͢a̶̧̞̺̩͖͔̣̳ͤ͡r̶̩̱̠̭͔ͬ͆e̊̿͏̪̖̳̝̼͍͝ ̨̜͚̘̼̟͈͋̀ͫͅȍ҉̟̜̣u̻̞̞̯̜̘͓̺ͩ̓̾ͮ͛t͋ͯ̿͏̞̲̰̠̰s̢̳̦̭̳̼̣̞̺͂ͮi͇͓̭̞̐͑̿d͓͚̹̟̳͓̳̯͒̔͜͝ͅȩ͎̻͈̯̘ͣ̀͞ ̻̖̬͙̣͍͚ͬ́͆̆͂̒̑̆͠ț̵̘̫̬̄̒̔͋͒ͅh̶̯̯͉͐̈͑̾̀̚e̟̯̲͖̯̭͆͆͢͟ ͣ̂ͥͭ̓̈́҉̛̝̻̮̭̮͙c̭͖̗̹̟̥ͩ͒͛͋͢y̶̸̯͇͉͛̀c͚͉̟̪̩̺̗͂̏ͨͨ̏͞l̢͔͈̣͖̱̜̙̪͙͛̈́ͯ̎͂͗͒̿e̡͗̈͐̀͏̗͍̣͍͈̺̦.̘̆̈͆ͪͯ͜

 

> ̸̳̦͔̣̼̤̪̉͛̈́̂́͝͡Ẃ̛̝̥̬͚͓̠͙̗̯̓̇ͯ̇́ͩ̈́e̢̲̺̖̗̝͙͎̓͋̋̂ͬ͒ͅ ͈̘̪̭̜̭ͣ̔ͧ̄sͪ͑͟͏̢̝̪h̷̶̘̱͚̭͉̖͎̿̓̆̆͐̊a͋̐҉͎̪̦̝̭͇͔l͕̯̩̤̟̬̫̒̓͋̎ͫ̅͂̚l͎̪̦̲͙͕̻̔̒̍̇̂̑̿̇͘ ͚̺̞̞͉͍̖̤͋̂ͧ̄́̀̚n̪͔̫͂̓͊͒̆̉o̵̢̟͎̺̠̮̜̥̳ͥ̄͂̔͒̌̽̈́t̖͒ͤ͗ͨͣ͢ ̺ͬ̃̐͋̃ͨ̀͞f̸̷͓͇̎̉̔̿̈̋͜ọ̢̟͉͓̙̟̻̽ͫͣr̶̤̹̲͛ͧ̋ͤ̍ͫ͊̽͗͘g̥͉͎̜̿͛̏ͦ͐̋̈́ͮͫë̳̲ͬ̎͊̀t͖̣͈̉̇͌͐ͨ̉͆̚ ̥̺͉̅̈́̇ͫͅt̷͍ͪ̚h͓͙̻͈͇̝͇̐͊̍̆͋́ͧ̉̔ì̟͔̝̉̑s̉͏̠̱̮̭̘̪.̘̤̣̳͆͊ͥ͛͡

 

-----

> You halt all aggressions with the gnomes immediately, and you finally spot Fluttershy at the gate, who is now cowering behind the frame.

“Oh, hey Fluttershy, how’s it going?”

> She squeaks in response, terrified at the sight she just witnessed.

> You guess you *were* a bit intimidating there, huh?

> “I was, uh… going to see if, uhm… if that’s ok…?”

> Walking up to her, the gnomes turning quietly to follow you, as a nervous sweat works on your brow.

> Spotting the basket of nourishing food, you pick up on her offer, and give a sincere nod.

“Let’s, uh, go for a picnic, shall we?”

> She silently nods, a smile forming after successfully persuading you to do something with her finally happening.

> Now, this what a generous walk, and quite frankly you don’t want to go in the full details, despite how tempting it is to do so.

> Not even sure where you ended up at, you felt like you’ve climbed a mountain range, treaded a scorching desert, and perhaps there was a beach scene.

> You’re not even sure if you’re in Equestria anymore at this point, but you manage to find yourself in an amazing field, forever stretching in an alluring expanse.

> You gingerly spot Canterlot in the distance; welp, that solves the mystery of where you are-

> You’re pretty much exactly where you were when you first arrived here, unknowingly to Fluttershy.

> Pulling out a red and white checkered sheet from her basket of delicious wonders, you assist Fluttershy with spreading it across a hill, ready to eat whatever she has planned for you.

“So, my dear missie, what dark plans do you have in store for me this fine day?”

> Rustling her wings uneasily, she gives you a look, one many mares hold so easily, of anxiety and doubt.

“Relax, relax! I know you’re not trying anything on me. I hope. I believe it. Maybe.”

> “Anon, please! You’re making me nervous already!”

> Raising both your arms in surrender, you pull out another small latch box out from a sleeve, and randomly pull out two wine glasses from the inside of your coat.

> How in Septimus’s name did you pulled out two wine glasses? Not even you know, nor do either of you care how you managed to travel with glass patted down; Fluttershy, however, gives you a look of wonder at what these glasses could possibly be for.

> Spreading out different breads, fruit, and vegetable, she bites the bullet and asks, as you fill up your glass with a clear red liquid into your personal glass.

> “Anon… if I may ask, what is that?”

> About to sip into your drink, having filled it half full, you pause for a moment; holding down the glass, you reach it forward for Fluttershy to taste.

> “Oh no, I wouldn’t ask if I could, but… if I may ask, but I don’t want to be trouble…”

“Fluttershy, just smell it; I wouldn’t be trying to shove it down your throat after I was about to sip it, if it weren’t something oh so wonderful.”

> The timid pegasus, raising her head forward, smells the inside of the glass.

> “Mmm… apples?”

“Yes, it’s apple wine, a fine delicacy from my world- try some.”

> Hesitating for the least of moments, she opens her     mouth as you tip the glass in. Letting her take two small gulps, you remove the glass pensively, just as she gives a sound of satisfaction.

> “My, that was… very nice!” She gains a slight blush on her face, the light tint of alcohol making her flush with color.

> Filling your own glass and splitting a loaf of bread, you soon indulge yourself in the delights of food and spirits.

> As winds blow by with soothing sensations to the touch, Fluttershy eventually settles herself beside you, lying against your thigh, and breaks the silence.

> “I hope you don’t mind if I do this.”

“I’m just glad you’re not stuttering much or attempting to drug me. I owe you for helping me out at that party anyways, and it’s been long due that we get to hang out like this.”

> Laying a hand on her head, she giggles as she shakes it off.

> “Oh, come now, Anon, you know you shouldn’t be doing that. I respect Rainbow Dash enough to not be ok with you going that far.”

“What, petting your mane? I do it with Luna just as much, and it’s not like it can hurt anything.”

> “It could hurt Rainbow Dash’s feelings.”

“I don’t think anything I do could hurt Dashie’s feelings at this point.”

> She ponders on this, and makes no motion to stop you as you resume your stroking.

> She does, however, make a complaint as you fill up your second glass of wine.

> “You should let me have some more of that, Anon.”

“You should also be informed is that this stuff has questionable side effects, namely poor decision making and drowsiness. If, for some God forsaken reason, this turns you from my adorable Fluttershy to the not so lovable Flutterapist, I promise you that only one of us will be returning to Ponyville, and you can certainly venture that it won’t be you.”

> She pauses for a moment, before nudging her nose into the glass, egging you silently to lift the glass for her to take a healthy swig.

“Your hangover, boss, don’t be complaining if you can’t fly straight in an hour.”

> “Teehee!”

-----

> You don’t even care anymore; you’re pulling things out of your coat that shouldn’t even be close to safe storing or hiding in there.

> You have a jewelry box that has Luna spinning around as a sweet tune plays in a simple tone.

> Random lilies are thrown about, just purely for decoration. Who the hell knows why.

> You have a miniature sundial chilling beside you, the shade of the sunlight giving you an estimate of time; it currently guesses to say about four in the afternoon.

> Fluttershy, still in her same spot beside you, is thoroughly enjoying herself, listening to the song.

> “Anon… where is that tune from?”

“It’s a song… I learned to play long ago. I long forgotten how to do it myself, but at the very least the tune is here to listen to.”

> You hear the original chords, an A natural major, before it sooths into G with little change. The sweet melody of The Twilight Requiem.

> You feel the notes sting with each crescendo, memories of your past welt themselves before you, the prickle of your previous life nipping at the memories you thrive to hold on here.

> Bitterness taking a hold of you, you didn’t have a chance to address it before your chest started to seize up.     

“Tch, ugh…”

> You feel the ripping sensation, you always do; it’s been like that almost every day for the past week.

> You try to bear it, but not without Fluttershy noticing your agony.

> “Anon, Anon!”

> Swaying on the spot, Fluttershy is doing her best to keep you upright. Clutching your chest with your hands like the jaw of life, you ride the pain like a well-built boat into a pool of lava.

> A full minute passes this time, and your body finally releases you from the aching. Fluttershy, wrapping herself around you, is checking your vital signs.

> Apparently years with animals have made her into a trained human medic.

> “Please, you can’t go like this…! I-I can’t see you like this…”

“Ugh… relax, relax, I’m not going anywhere. Although I admit that Death not making a surprise visit to screw my junk up is beyond my comprehension.”

> Looking around, having tempted fate, you turn around quickly to see if the grim character will suddenly burst from the grass to seal your doom.

> After a moment of intense focus, Fluttershy watching you glance around, you decide this was not the case.

“Huh, figured irony wouldn’t give up on the chance to reveal itself.”

-----

> Now, you’ll admit, today was a pleasantly windy day. The scent of flowers flowing through the air, along with the aroma of serenity, was nothing to complain about.

> However, this was nothing to the sudden gusts picking up; is there a tornado making a touchdown nearby or what?

> “A-Anon…!”

“I know, it’s getting a bit windy out, perhaps we should head back.”

> Fluttershy is giving the broadest of eyes, her pupils stretching to the size of grapefruit.

> “Anon, t-turn around!”

> As soon as you make the motion, a loud crash shocks you to your feet, bouncing up like Mario on a trampoline.

> In the sight in front of you, a goliath of scales has descended before you, a decently vast dragon a mere few dozen yards away.                                              

> Now, you’ve seen large things that seem menacing, terrifying if you will; Gundams, MootZeus, even Godzilla and King Kong during a rhyme-off with Zecora.

> However, this is the first natural living thing to appear, this ridiculously HUGE; its size alone would dwarf the entire town of Ponyville.  

> You could see TEETH larger than you, and the way it’s smiling is enough to reveal each and every single one of them.

> Great planet of Bryyo, this thing could eat you, Fluttershy, and the population of Canterlot, and it wouldn’t even be CLOSE to full.

> A single step from it put its face inches from you, a single eye taking into your sight. You nearly wet yourself.

“Well, uh, shit. Fluttershy, say your prayers.”

-----

> The dragon laughs at your comment.

> The smell of death, rot, and other things you’d rather not mention immediately engulfs your lungs, the stench causing you to gag.

> Backing up a few paces, Fluttershy cowering behind you, you do your cursed best to stand your ground, which isn’t at all very convincing to the bemused draconic being.

> Rearing its head to look over the sad sight, it speaks; not only is this dragon obscenely huge, it bloody TALKS; in the voice of Sean Connery, no less.

> “HUMAN. Long have I slumbered, and here I now stand. Do you not know why I am before you?”

> What the boxer-staining kind of question is that?

“I, err, don’t know. Why would I know? Who are you? Are you… going to eat me?”

> The dragon booms in laughter once more, thankfully billowing the smoke to the skies this time.

> “Lololololol.”

> This is a very interesting dragon, to say the least; entirely green scaled, it has no distinguishing features behind some very nice horns, as well as an interesting grey beard.

> “I have been in rest for over a thousand years, a millennia of dreaming, and something most horrid disturbed me from my lair, approaching upon sacred grounds of the dragons.”

> “My name is Isk’rl Hrthor Migresh Trongadonga Jksire, but you may call me,”

> C’mon, Trongadonga, Trongadonga!

> “Trongadonga.”

> YES!

> Fist pumping at this, the dragon meekly watches you making the motions before continuing.

> “As for your latter question, I have no interest in devouring your sorry hide; I don’t think you would be a fitting appetite anyhow.”

“That I won’t argue; however, I do not know what you approach me for, as I have no idea as to what could have disturbed you so, nor how I can help you.”

> He sobers up from his personal humor, his beard lowering with his head to address within a closer proximity.

> “You may not know yet, but the creature is something even greater than I,”

> Oh great, something that’s more monstrous than this guy, and he wants you to take care of it.

> “And it afflicted terror and fright to anyone too close to it. Even I fled from the terror of its presence. However, in the scenes of horror in my head, one thing stood out to me; a sole human,”

> Dafuq does he know humans for, anyhow?

> “Standing amongst the chaos, and harvesting its power to unleash a nightmare in which this world has never seen. That being was you… Anon.”

“Alright, I have so many questions to ask you right now, but the most prominent one that popped up was… how in Godfrey’s Law do you know my name?”

> He sniffs at your question, as if to doubt his power would mean your instant fate.

> Postponing judgment on your sinning soul, however, he answers in the best of attentions.

> “I have powers that no mere mortal should understand; I know all around me, as many my age could comprehend. To answer your question directly: magic.”

> Ohthatdoesit.jpg

-----

> Stooping down to pick up a trembling Fluttershy, you turn to face the dragon once more.

“Alright, so what can I do? I don’t think I can do much in this current state,”

> Even if this is your dream/coma state thing. Wait, he can-!

> “Yes, I can understand the thoughts of others, human; and yes… I understand the foundations of this world.”

> Both you and Fluttershy are bewildered, each for very different reasons.

> Before you could respond to the dragon sage, Fluttershy poses a question of frightening proportions.

> “Uhm, Mr. Dragon, w-what do you mean by ‘foundations of this world’?”

> The dragon, as well as yourself, are both unsure on how to answer that; turning his eyes to you, he asks the question that may or may not change the mood of the picnic.

> “Human… Anon, does she not know about you, of what is wrong with you?”

“Tongadonga, before you ask any more revealing questions, I must ask you first to shut the fuck up.”

> You’re already angry, but this was nothing to how the dragon responded. Rearing his head to a height far above you, smoke flows out of his nostrils, and with a deep inhalation, he unleashes an inferno, soon to envelop the entire field.

> You lift one of your hands fairly lazily, a frantic Fluttershy hanging tight in your other.

> Not sure as to how to deal with this sudden invitation to a quick death, you think of the first word that occurs in your head;

> No.

“FUS RO DAH!”

> Apparently in Equestria, Fus Ro Dah means “no”.

> However, it was more than effective; a gust of air, traveling with the sound waves of your voice, is a massive gathering of energy that impales the flames, infuriating them with sudden excess oxygen and returning back to its source.

> A rasengan of air enters the dragon’s mouth successfully, its eyes bulging as it attempts to swallow the mass. After victoriously doing so, it releases it back into the sky, a huge fiery belch unleashed into the atmosphere.

> That seriously won’t contribute to global warming at all.

“Now, I do hope that we are in agreement that we shouldn’t piss each other off, here.”

> Slowly lowering his head in consent, he gives a warming nod of understanding.

> “I understand, I should have realized that, with this world being… I see. I humbly apologize, dear Fluttershy, but I cannot be the one to tell you some things; perhaps, one day, you’ll comprehend the truth.”

> Fluttershy is not amused, but she doesn’t have a chance to stage a complaint before Tongadonga brings his massive head forward, resting it on the ground close to you.

> “Get on, mortals, and I shall show you the charges of devastation that has been brought upon this world.”

> Nodding in consent, you lower Fluttershy to climb up to a horn, and motion towards the pegasus to join you.

> …

> She’s not budging a bit.

> “A-A-Anon… I think… I’m going to go home; I’ll see you later, alright?”

> Oh come on, just because you’re getting on what very well could be one of the oldest and largest dragons in the world, taking to the skies, and witnessing a terror even Tongadonga won’t face, does not mean she should be afraid.

“Fluttershy, come on, no need to be frightened, we’re just going for a little trip.”

> “Oh Anon, please, I don’t want to be a b-bother…”

> You give Fluttershy a taste of her own medicine; a stare down of dark persuasion, you rustle her jimmies in the art of intimidation.

> Under the powers of your glare’s might, she cowers to the grass, lying down sheepishly.

> “Oh, o-ok…”

-----

> You and Fluttershy are now in the air, riding a dragon that more than doubles one of NASA’s rocket boosters.

> It seems that sailing through the air on top of a dragon is harder than you first deemed; lying down on his horn and flailing all four limbs around it tightly, you’re scared senseless by the motions the great dragon makes with each stroke of his wings.

> To be honest, you’re not quite sure as you how Fluttershy is hanging on; looking below you, you see she wedged herself under the horn you’re holding on you, and is undergoing a small panic attack with accepting what is going on.

> However, before we could even pass the clouds, a small popping noise occurred;

> (BOOM)

> Tongadonga, in his own world of the skies, ignores the sound without a thought.

> You, however, give the best look around you could muster without letting go; and before you could warn Tongadonga, you finally see what caused it.

> Rainbow Dash, a small blue blur, just performed a sonic rainboom from miles away, and is now a colorful missile, aiming for the dragon’s head.

> Entering a speed never seen before, you open your mouth to shout at her, only to hear the crack of a scale when Dashie viciously collided into it.

> Dash: “No one takes Anon, not even a big ol’ dragon like you!”

> With a swift motion, Trongadonga swings his mouth to the side, and swallows Rainbow Dash whole in one fell swoop.

“TRONGDONGA! YOU SPIT HER OUT THIS INSTANT!”

> “Mmmph, mmmrfphl.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck what you just said; I love that motherfucker and YOU. WILL. SPIT.  HER. OUT!”

> Just as soon as she came in, she was shot just as fast out, flying over the dragon’s head in a spiraling spit wad; catching her midair with an arm, you’re caressed with that horrid stench once more, and it appears Rainbow is faring no better.

“Ewwwww~!”

> “ECK!”

> The wind blowing by, drying off the saliva attached to her mane, she’s spitting out the irremovable taste of reek in her mouth.

> “Ugh! Anon, what the hell is going on here? Why are you being kidnapped by a dragon?!”

> Tongadonga, giving a slight side glance, pierces the clouds into an amazing setting.

> This was a most beautiful sight; almost like flying on a more exposed airplane, you see the clouds spanning infinitely, all the meanwhile occasional holes appear to show the tiny world below.

> Trongadonga responds to Dashie before you could take your eyes off the sight.

> “I would not kidnap this human, nor would I forcibly take anyone; he needs to see the truth of what is happening to the world, so he may decide the best course of action before it is too late.”

> Dash looks at your nodding to this, and gives a look of speculation.

> “Anon… remember when you told me there were some things that you would answer later…?”

> You didn’t have the heart to spill the beans just yet, but you knew this time was going to happen sooner or later; Fluttershy has been silently wondering what to think of it as well.

“Trongadonga, I hate to ask this of you, but…”

> He understood before you could finish, stretching his wings and slowing his ascension to a halt, before slowly gliding.

> Able to let go and relax, you sit still on his head, joined by an angsty Dashie and a confused Fluttershy.

> “Listen well, human. What you’re only doing is postponing the inevitable, and for that I would call you a coward. However… some things not said to protect others is just as virtuous, and so I shall weave a simple tale for these two, from what I gathered in your mind.”

> “Fluttershy… and Rainbow Dash… this human, whom you know as Anon Anon, is currently in our world, this much you understand, correct?”

> Both of the pegasi nod, and although you don’t even know how he would notice this (except by bucking magic), he continues without a second thought.

> “By no means is this mortal in a strange territory as you two thought; in all respects, he is where he always has been- by this, I mean his mind.”

> He must have sensed their confusion, as well as your grimace, because he hastily went to explain himself better.

> “Anon is trapped inside of his head, a makeshift Equestria of the world he knew and loved before his time here, and it is soon that his being, as well as his existence, will soon collapse. A dream, of sorts, in which he will soon wake from.”

> Fluttershy looked at you in horror, making a face that could melt your feelings into a pit of sorrow.

> Not far from feeling the same, Rainbow Dash is disconcerted as well, looking at you for some sort of denial. You look away in shame.

> “Anon, is this… true…? Am I not real?”

> “Anon perceives you as real as he does himself; you are no more a fantasy than anything he’s witnessed in his so-called ‘reality’. Mind over matter, I suppose.”

> Dashie: “But… it’s been months, so much time… wouldn’t he be awake by now?”

> “In essence, he would have, yes… however, he is in a position where he may never wake up; when I meant the time he left the dream, he would have…”

“I will die. I am failing, and I don’t have much time to work with, I believe.”

-----

> Silence took the four of you, the weight of your words piled on each and every one of them.

> Rainbow is the first to speak up.

> “Anon… if you knew that this was going to happen, why didn’t… why didn’t you tell us, any of us?”

> Still looking away, not wanting to face them nor the truth, you find yourself suddenly with two pegasi laying on either side of you once more, both in tears.

> Unable to being yourself to the stoic badass you are, you can’t help but let a tear fall from your eye as well.

“I didn’t want to believe it. When Twilight first told me, I was upset, skeptical at first;”

> Fluttershy: “Twilight knows?”

“Yes, in her studies of me she found and proved that I was in some sort of catatonic state, and I remember vividly on what happened; I feel it…”

> Your body gives a slight pang of pain just to remind you.

“My body has been getting steadily worse and worse, and I know there’s been signs where I won’t hold out much longer.”

> Closing your eyes, unable to bear the sight of such sad ponies before you, you lay a hand on each of their heads.

“I don’t know what to do, but there’s been something bothering me…”

> Trongadonga: “And what is that, mortal?”

“There has been things that has been going on here, out of my control, way out of my power. This Death character is the most interesting of them all; when I almost died before, he asked me who he was. He’s Death, or so I thought, but… he was never in the show, nor were you.”

> “I, at the very least, am somewhat realistic, being natural to this world.”

“You are, yes, but… Death, just what is he?”

> “More than him meets the eye, and you must think outside the box to figure some things out, even if you’re trapped inside it. We’re soon approaching my ‘home’, or what was once it. The land of the dragons.”

-----

> Cruising through the mist of clouds, you find yourself above a desert; or, at least, what’s now a desert.

> “Human, this was once a beautiful range of canyons, mountains, and lava; the perfect setting for us dragons. However… as you can see… THAT has turned it into nothing more than wasteland.”

> Turning to where he pointed, your spine shivers in sudden fear, your hands shaking. This feeling… it’s just like when you were trapped in Fluttershy’s well-made pit.

> Writhing in the center of the sand dunes, a thousand tentacles of slime, pelt, and stone are flailing mindlessly into the air, far beyond your reach.

> Eyes, not irritated by the sand blowing into it, protrude every inch from its “skin”, watching everything around it.

> A sense of chaos around it, tornadoes of fire are swerving about it in a fairly intimidating manner.

> Trongadonga: “As you can see and feel, this creature has just risen from its resting place from far beneath Equestria, and has decimated everything it touched. It will eventually engulf the world in its pandemonium.”

> You’re at a loss for words, unsure as to what it is, why it’s in your world, and how it could possibly relate to you.

> “I cannot answer any of your questions, Anon, but there is one thing clear: It needs to be stopped, before it destroys the rest of the kingdom as you know it. It could be your sickness festering, slowly trying to kill your mind as well as you; it could be a bad memory that has arisen from your subconscious; it could very well be a nightmare in your dream.”

> Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, silent and hesitant to do anything but watch are both shaking in their own fright.

> “Don’t be foolish, Rainbow Dash; while you vow to protect Anon here from any harm, there is nothing you could do to stop it at this time.”

> Dashie, jumping at the realization that the dragon read her feelings, gives a look of indignation at Trongadonga. You give a sigh, knowing what she’s thinking as well.

“It’s fucking magic, Dashie; I figured at least you are used to that kind of explanation.”

> “Yeah, well, it’s still kinda creepy!”

> Trongadonga gives a hearty chuckle, still gliding the outskirts of his once homeland.

> “I understand your feelings, but I have seen and witnessed things in my lifetime even I could not understand. However, it is time I take you three home, and I find my own resting place.”

> Patting a scale, you think of a question for him to answer, in which he responds thoughtlessly.

> “Yes, a few dragons managed to escape, and there are enough of us spread around the world for us to survive. However, the draconic capital of Krshim’ski will forever be lost in its history. I will have to find a new home.”

> Feeling pity for his unsavvy situation, he gives a low groan of kindness at your thoughts.

> “Worry not, you three; us dragons have been known to survive even the foulest of-“

-----

> “Č͙͕̗ͥͅo̶͕͇̾̍͢m̢͉͚̋ͬ͐͠e̼̪̮͓̦̓̆̋̊̃̋ͅ ̧̦̮̝̬͓̜ͥ̃̄́͋t̲̲̘͒́̒̋̐ͯ̓ͭ͘͞o̝̝̼̖͍̜͌ͥ̄̅̓̍̚ ̧̖̺͕̼̙͛̄̕͡ͅm̷̘̄̾̔e͎̜̦̣̤̖̙̓̍͂ͯͨ̄͆ͬ…ͭͩ͑҉̞̫̜͜ ̗̝̲̹̞͔ͩͮͬ̐̒́̀j̘̜̭̯͑̊ͭ̿̀́o̶͌̅҉̫̼̮͕̗̜i̓̊̋ͬ̌͏̧̫͎̙̩̪̫̹̪͝n̘̩̠̱̼͕̖̘͑ͣ͊͞ ̛̲̜͇͖͚͕̓̔͊̊͂ͫ̈͟m̰̝̗̥̈͑̃ͤ̊͟e̵̹͉̲̙̖̬̾ͬ̄ͨ͑͌̈̌͟…̵̰̺͕̦͙̹̮ͦ͌͠ͅ ̸̣̣̰̏̈͆̑̾̋̚ẉ͓̦̻̼̥̘̮̆͌̄ͧͣ̾ͫ̉e̱̗̣̰͈̩̳̦̼ͦ̈́ ͓͕̱̦̤̞ͪ͗̑̀ͦͤͮ̋͑͞͡s͉͔ͮͪ̕͟h̦̥̐̒͟â̝̞͎̈́ͮͤ̅̆ͮ̕l̸̷͖̅͑̾̓ͫl̷̼͇ͫ̈̆̃…̲̩̤̦̞͍̉ͧ́̃͌̍ͪ̕͜”

 

 

-----

> You hear these words scrape into the back of your mind, nails carving into a chalkboard of your mentality.

> Each word dripped with venom and anarchy, barbs gripping at your awareness.

> “Ugh… what is this feeling… who said that…?”

> “Y-you heard that too, Rainbow D-Dash…?”

> It appears you were not alone in hearing the silent yet horrid message, as you see frantic looks of the two looking at each other.

> Before you can comment of your own audio hallucination, you see that one of the tentacles is glaring at you.

> Now, you’d think that an appendage would have difficulty seeing you from this distance, let alone the absurd fact that it’s, well, a limb; however, it’s doing just that, as a dozen eyes materialize and staring in your direction.

> It sees you.

> It rockets into the sky, infinitely growing from the sands below, and it arcs down towards the dragon, pegasi and yourself, with no intentions of stopping.

“Oh, shit! Trongadonga, it’s coming for us, we need to retreat!”

> Already wise on what’s happening, the valiant beast is already turning to flee the scene, but you knew there was no chance to escape the antenna of ooze before it reaches you.

> You pull out an extensive masamune, seemingly out of nowhere.

> Rainbow Dash: “Anon, you can’t-!”

> Trongadonga: “Don’t be a fool; you know it wants you to do this!”

> Fluttershy: “Anon!”

> Within a split second of it reaching you, you launch yourself in the most heroic leap you could muster, your glorious weapon ready to be swung.

> Meeting the ominous limb just in time, you collide your sword into the flesh, cutting it through effortlessly.

-----

> “Y̶̨̬̱͕̤͎̯̯͗̓̆ͬ͝o̷̹̻̳̔ͦ͆̽͛͌u͔͓̪̳̎́̄ͅ’̷̟̤͚͔̰̱̫͇ͬ͛ͩ̽͠ĺ̈́̑̑̈̔̆ͯ҉͔̲̰̱̦̮̮̕l̤͇̦̬̯̼̞͌͐ͅ ̛̺͕͚ͦ̌ͫ͛ͬ́͟͡s̲͖̠̍ͣ͊́͊ǫ͉̰͓̾̄͊ͯ̽̇ö̡̨̲̭́͌ͤͧ̔̾̂ͅn̡̬͖͕͇̯͍̝̼̾̏͠ ̦͉̌ͩ̾̅̅̄͆͝ͅṷ͍͙̬̗̊ͣ̓͡n͈̟̼̾ͨ̓̒̄ͫͯͮd̵̲̺̺̭͎̗̝ͥ̍͟͢ͅe̩͍͔̥͎̼̩͌ͬ̾̆ͦ̃͟͢͝ȑ̶͚̱͙̬͍̻̃s̷̲̮̙̞ͮ͛ͬ̊̽͗̀̈́t͓̯̖̠͖ͩ́̇ͪͩ́͘͘ą͇̫̗͈̺̬̤̜̿̉̏̾ͣͥ̾̚͝n̛͖̲̰͈̺͚ͥͤḑ͈̞̜̇̐̔͊ͥ͘…̸̪̠͓̠͉̭̤͆̂̾ͩͪ̒ͭͣ͛͠ ͔̰̜͕͓͓̯͔̄ͧ͗́ṫ̶̢͈̫̭̼ͭͦ̎ͪh̨̲̖̗̼̙̀̇ͥ̈ͪͥͩ͑͛͜͡e̺̰͓ͯ̈ ̞̤̪͚̙̖̱ͤ̄̉ͫ̾͡t̟̰̗̘̘̤̬̖͊͜r̡̻̘̱͎̭ͨͨ͂̈̒̚ͅu̧̹̥̯ͯͬ̑ͤ̕͞è͈̩̹͙̹̹͎ͣͧ̎͘͠ ̬́̓ͮ́r̳̙̥̻͕̒ͩ͆̄͐̀eͤ̏ͩͯ͛̾҉̭̪̀ȁ̶̧̩̱̯̣͈ͩ̓͛͜s̜͚̯͖̬̃ͥͯͬ͜͠o͎͖̖ͩͩ́̿ͮ̏̏̒ͯ͟n̙̮͙̖ͩ́̑̋̉ ͉̻ͫ̈͋̀͘ǫ͇̱̔ͦ̆ͤ̊͗̑f͌̐҉̵͈̠̦͎͙ ̭͖̹̯̦̖̅ͭ͘͞ͅf̶͇͓͈̣̿ͬ́̃ͭ͊̍͗e̼̗̔̌̂ͣͭa͋́͗͌ͫͥͫ̚͏̲̺̀r̵͚̠̣̝̲͆̄ͮ͞…̡͚͙̙̖͉ͮ̾̔̿̏ͣ̍̅!̴̼̰̖̟̯̖̅̊̑͛ͯ͑̂ͯ”  

-----

> Finishing your swing, you soon realize that one blow alone would do nothing, as the wound turns into a clamp around you, and you’re soon falling with a vicious velocity.

> Racked with torment and pain beyond any reason, you scream as your mind is pierced a thousand times with images of abhorrence and hate.

> Crashing down into the sand below, you feel your body break in several ways you could not mention, and you’re slowly threshed into the depths below, foot by foot.

> Sand pouring into your mouth, your shrieks are muffled into agonized groans, and before you could accept your fate, you black out, unable to grasp the final moments of your death.

> “ANONNNNNNNNN!”

> Who… said that…?

> And all was gone.                    

-----

> In a far different world, there was a small commotion as usual, a small handful of dedicated nurses and a couple doctors working their damned best to keep a patient alive.

> This person, a somewhat young lad, looks positively filthy, emaciated, and with a shaggy beard to boot; it’s as if he spent months living in a cave and sailed through dirt before crumpling his sorry unconscious ass into the hospital.

> However, as of right now (and I assure you “right now” could mean anything with the time difference of different worlds) he’s currently in what could only be the most pathetic state a human being could be in.

> The shorter doctor, a stocky man with a beefy mustache that could look like the long lost brother of Danny DeVito and Hulk Hogan, is the first to address the grim situation.

> “Nurse, give me the usual report. Has his medication or IV input changed any since this happened?”

> “No, sir, after his stroke just now his vitals have regained some composure, although at this point he’s really considered brain-dead.”

> The taller doctor, lean and thin and mistakably the Luigi of the two, speaks his concern.

> “Has the parents responded as to whether they wanted to pull the plug on him?”

> “Yes, sir. The mother specifically requested that we keep him intact for at least another week, to prepare the funeral and say their goodbyes to… what’s left of him.”

> They look at the withered yet living corpse before them, dozens of machines doing their best to save what’s left of the body.

> “Doctor, he hasn’t shown any signs of improvement, not since that time we managed to resuscitate him for a moment.”

> “I know that, nurse. But… I couldn’t help but put hope into this one, after that small miracle. At the very least, we know he is still here, even if in spirit.”

> “Now is not the time to become religious over this guy, doctor; however, at this point even I feel like saying a prayer for him.”

> “We all do, religious or not. Seeing such a young person, beaten so viciously to the point of death, only to be dragged on cruelly these past few months.”

> The taller doctor, looking at what’s left of the patient, sees the countless scars and burns covering his body; his face is hardly recognizable, an ear shredded, and a finger missing on top of it all.

> “Perhaps it is better to end his suffering, rather than trying to bring him back into this horrid reality.”

> “Remember your Oath, doctor. Always do your best to save a patient, no matter how grim it looks.”

> “I know, but…”

> He pauses, choosing his words carefully, before slumping in defeat.

> “Yes, sir.”

-----          

> Ugh.

> Yes, “ugh”.  That is all you have to say in response to what had just occurred.

> Having been stuck in some sort of unconscious (ignoring that you’re already trapped in one), you’ve been stuck in the “padded white room”, forced to listen to a blurry conversation between what you can only assume to be medical professionals.

> Guess your mother loves you enough to keep you up for a few days more. You kind of wished you could revive yourself for thirty seconds, slap the doctors in the face, and tell them to keep you alive for the rest of your days.

> You can’t even begin to imagine just how much the medical bills are right now with trying to keep you alive.

> But, more importantly, you’ve shifted from a serene white world of dreams into a warm black one, your senses slowly regaining themselves.

> The first appeared to be your smell and touch, feeling your eyes shut, and sniffing the ever alluring aroma of… animals.

> You don’t even need three guesses as to where you’re at, and you didn’t even bothering moving an eye when you heard Fluttershy and Rainbow talking.

> “Rainbow Dash, I don’t mind you staying here, but you don’t need to fawn over him like this every day.”

> “Flutter, you know as much as I do that if what that big dragon and Anon said was true, then there’s no telling when he might go! He might be dead right now!”

> You could tell from her voice she’s been crying constantly, her voice cracking with each breath.                                                                                           

> “I’m his special some*pony, and I promised to be there for him in the end!”

> D’awww. You manage to hold off a warm smile, trying to hold up the charade of being dead/unconscious on the couch.

> Just in time, too, as a hoof is pressed against your neck to check a pulse; how whoever can check it with a hoof, only they know.

> “He’s still there.”

> “Yeah, yeah."

> “Dash… you and I both know we love him, and we know he might be going soon.”

> “Back off! I-I know that, but… still.”

> You sneak a half glance, and find that neither of the two are paying that much attention to you.

> There’s a nice glass of water next to you, and you suddenly realize just how thirsty you are.

> You almost think about reaching for it, just to quench yourself and scare the daylights out of the ponies, when you notice that someone has actually grasped that you’re conscious.

> You say someone, but it’s actually something- that fucking rabbit, and he’s wielding a shit-eating grin.

> He decides that since you’re playing dead, he can antagonize you with the flipping of the bird.

> You don’t know how he recognizes the one finger salute, but it’s enough to stir your jimmies to maximum capacity in the fastest record possible.

-----

> With a fluid motion of getting up and grabbing the glass, the two mares look just in time to see you rocket the glass right at the damned rabbit.

> The contained water apparently did not feel that attached to the cup, as it soars out of it onto your arm and the floor, splashing everywhere.

> Sailing right between the little devil’s ears, the glass itself cascades in a fairly explosive manner into the wall, glass shattering in ways indescribable.

> The wind brushing across the hair on top of his head was enough to remove the smirk off of that rabbit’s face, and you have a smug sense of justice when the little deviant books it up the stairs.

> Having just witness attempted murder on one of her more frustrating pets, as well as your sudden arousal from your unconscious, has left Fluttershy’s mouth hanging to the floor, still trying to grasp what just happened.

> Meanwhile, Dash’s eyes are returning back into head for the very same reason, and gradually a smile catches on her face, having finally seen that you’re conclusively alive.

“Fuck, I missed.”

> “Anon-!”

> “ANON!”

> Ignoring the scene entirely, the event of you alive and standing was enough to put the comfort of a close friend back in their hearts, and they both rush to your side.

> Having the blood suddenly go to your legs, you fall back on the couch in a sitting position, lightheaded and dazed from the movement.

“Sorry about that, Fluttershy, I’ll clean that up in a minute…”

> “No-no-no, don’t worry about that. I’ve cleaned up worse messes-“

“Like the first time I was in here?”

> She looks away and grins, the memory fresh in both your minds.

> “Well, that too, but never mind that. You need to relax for a moment while your body is stretching.”

> Suddenly cramped, you move your arms a bit to take out some of the tense aches your body has in store for you; it appears that your healing spells can’t quite handle all the extensive niggles you’ve gained in that last dispute.

> Wait…

“What happened…? Last time I checked I was dead as far as I could tell, I was certainly defeated in my act of daring bravado.”

> Apparently this was Rainbow Dash’s turn to talk, her words soaked with rage while she tries to talk in a calm matter.

> “Anon, what you did was very reckless and stupid; although the way you did that was pretty cool, nyehehe… anyways!”

“Anyways.”

> “After that big tentacle swatted you down like a fly, Fluttershy and I went to save you! Trongadonga bit into the thing and fought it off, and told us to get you out of there.”

> You chew on this tenderly, trying to take in each detail.

“Alright, and what happened to Trongadonga?”

> Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy look at each other with a glance of uncertainty, before they both turn back to you.

> “Well… we don’t know. He was fighting that… THING, and he told us that you were more important than anything else, including… him.”

> You to think optimistically, wishing well for the old being. Resting your arms behind your head, you try to think of what to do next.

> “Well, since I slept enough for today, I think I might go eat something, maybe go for a walk. Boy, do I feel a nice well-rested bonus!”

> They share thoughts between the two of thing, or at least it looked like they were syncing in thought.

> Dashie: “Well Anon, you’ve been, well…”

> Fluttershy: “You’ve been out for almost three days.”

> You choke midswallow of your saliva, hacking up a storm and pounding on your chest.

> Immediately jumping to conclusions, they press against you, as if their close proximity will ease your embarrassment.

> “Anon!”

> “Anon, are you alright?!”

> You stand up, and they follow you to the floor; you can’t help but feel slightly flustered.

“Damnit, I’m fine, I just had my spit go down the wrong pipe…!”

> Fluttershy: “Do you need me to help you again?”

> Horrible memories of her ‘helping’ you dislodge the spork from your throat surface, and you nippily shake your head, managing to compose yourself.

> Sitting back down, you suddenly feel a lot better, although your lungs ache a tad.

> Back in a nice solid pose, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash on either side of your lap, you pause to think on what this means.

> If you remember correctly, you heard the doctor mention about seven days left before they do something that will not end in your favor.

> Now, is days there and here the same? Is one world’s time frame slower?

> The doctor said something about being there for months… if it was supposedly a day in real life, and three here, he would have likely said a year; you did tally yourself around 4 months, so it’s either that or more.

> It’s likely on a 1:1 basis, even if you’re in a kind of REM state; otherwise the opposite may have been true, and your dreams are going almost triple the speed of time;

> And you would be in some hole, dead already.

> You shudder at the thought, still trying to comprehend the situation. Despite feeling so frantic… why do you feel so calm?

> Is it because the effects of stress are reduced with being in a cartoon setting? Perhaps you’ve accepted it long ago, and you’re just realizing it. Of course, the idea of two loving ponies on your lap kind of helps, too.

> Fluttershy: “Anon. I, uh, have a favor to ask for you, and you can totally reject it if you want…”

> You shoot back to attention, trying to view what’s going on.

> Fluttershy is blushing a bit anxiously, and Dashie appears to be quite ruffled with whatever the other pegasus has in mind.

> You don’t quite know what is going on, but you have this weirdest hunch that this was something discussed between the two of them before.

“What is it, Fluttershy?”

> “Well, you see, uhm…”

> She’s more nervous than she was before, and that’s saying something.

> “Rainbow Dash said, that it was ok, if…”

> Alright, definitely a poor rehearsal and you already know what’s happening here.

> “I told her about what you said about me.”

> Oh, well pump your butt with margarine and let loose greased lightning, Rainbow Dash knows about how much you like Fluttershy, and you’re not dead?

> You look at Rainbow Dash with a guise of both worry and content, and the face she’s trying hold off is irksome.

“Dashie, how do you feel about this?”

> She looks at you with tears in her eyes, and you clam the fuck up. Here you stand, with two ponies you love for different respective reasons, and there is a rift between the two of them-

> And you’re doing a circus act trying to balance on a rope hanging between the two of them.

> You’re not doing a good job.

> “She said… she said, that you liked her, a lot… that she was your favorite pony…”

> Alright, you; you know you don’t want to do this, but you’re manning the fuck up.

> You have The Final Countdown blaring in the back of your head now,

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jK-NcRmVcw

> You resolve to put your feelings in loud and clear.

“Alright, I am clearing the board, and I am going to tell you EXACTLY how it is, and if you don’t like it, well… there’s not much I can do about it.”

> They both look at you in anticipation; they both have their own bets on the line, it seems.

“You ready, motherfuckers?”

> Fluttershy: “Yes, Anon.”

> Rainbow: “You darn right I am!”

“Alright. Rainbow Dash, this is the actuality you need to hear, and I know it is going to sting, but you need to listen to it entirely through.”

> She nods, albeit solemnly.

“I was infatuated with Fluttershy ever since I saw her, before I came here. I entered the world knowingly, but I did so with a wonderful appreciation of this little mare.”

> You pat Fluttershy’s head, who accepts it willingly, much to Dashie’s grudge; you continue before one of them let loose.

“However…”

> And you said that word with such grave intent, much to Flutter’s chagrin.

“However, when I met her, she was acting… different. She changed, and she didn’t know how to act. I’ll admit, I told her she was the best thing since Swiss cheese,”

> “Swiss cheese?”

“Godly good. Anyways, I said that, and Fluttershy didn’t know how to act. I woke up in that bathrobe, and she attempted to tranquilize me to have her way. As you can guess, that changed my opinion of her fairly quickly.”

> Fluttershy’s ears drooped at that, and you pat her head again. Thankfully Rainbow is looking like she’s handling things better.

“Rainbow, you know when I met you here, things didn’t hit off to a swell start. Of course, in my time here up until our first ‘conflict’ of sorts, I was battered and paranoid from running away from Fluttershy’s well-made contraptions- not that I’m encouraging you, Fluttershy.”

> “Oh, I know.”

“However! Ever since then, my heart has been yours, Dashie; that sounded so cheesy that it hurts me to say it, but it needed to be done. Fluttershy… don’t let this hurt you. You know I care about you very much so, as I wouldn’t have gone so hard to amend things with you. However, both you and Rainbow here need to understand and accept that my feelings for both of you are on a different level; Fluttershy, I love you in a way that I want you happy, and I want to always be there for you. Although I know it may burn a bit, you’re like a, er… sister to me. Dashie… I love you. I want to be with you forever, even if it’s only so much time. You’re my special some*pony.”

> Now THAT was a dramatic talk. If you weren’t pulling everything out of the truth box in your heart, you wouldn’t be shocked a bit if they didn’t believe a bucking word you said.

> However, after a good moment of silence, the words started to sink in, and it appears that they were left satisfied.

> Rainbow: “That’s… that’s all I wanted to hear. Thank you, Anon.”

> Fluttershy: “D-does that mean… we can still go on picnics, and walks, and other stuff like that?”

> You give a little chuckle, ruffling Fluttershy’s mane. Seeing a small hint of envy from Dash, you ruffle her even harder, like a bully principal picking on two naughty kids.

“Yes, we can do that. There are many things we can do, alright?”

> “Yes… yes, you’re right…

> You’re busy fluffing her hair around that it took you a moment that Fluttershy was crying; not tears dropping, they were just streaming out at this point.

> Even Rainbow Dash reached forward to comfort her, as she embraces her in a tight hug.

> D’aww, that’s so precious.

> “Fluttershy, what’s wrong…? I thought you were happy…?”

> “Rainbow Dash, I, he… how can I be happy knowing one of my closest friends, that I was happy spending my life with, is going to d-d-…”

> You can’t help but frown yourself, look off across the room. So, this must be what it feels like, to see your friends and loved one crying over you.

> It’s just like those dreams, all over again. Your friends coming to say their prayers, their wishes for you to return… you remember each and every sob and teardrop.

> However, now is not the time to grieve,

“This is not the time nor place to worry about that, Fluttershy.”

> You wipe the tears from her eyes, and she looks at you with her baby blue pupils, both your jimmies and the Captain steeling themselves to ride it off.

> Sadly the Captain was, quite literally, steeling himself, and you realize the ship is sea worthy and ready to go for a voyage.

> You do your best to suppress him with bad waves and poor winds.

> “What do you mean, A-Anon?”

“What I mean is, is that I’m here now, and that’s all that should matter.”

> Rainbow puffs up and hops on your shoulder, striking a daring pose of awesomeness.

> “Hehe, he’s right, y’know! There isn’t anything but the present to worry about! And Fluttershy…”

> The yellow mare looks up gingerly at her.

> “What you were going to ask Anon… before I wasn’t ok with it, but after hearing from him the absolute truth, I think I’m fine, as long as you promise it’s only once.”

> Confused as Hitler waking up from a cryogenic stabilizer in a laboratory in Israel, you turn your head back and forth to see just what the banana bread they’re talking about. Failing to do so, you vocalize your intent:

“Da hell is going on, here?”

> Rainbow Dash facehoofs herself, and does a simple explanation.

> “Before Fluttershy can chicken out, she wanted to know what it’s like to, well… kiss you.”

> You poker face for a moment, and your laughter booms throughout the room. They both stare at you as you’re laughing your heart out.

> Stopping before you literally laugh your heart out, you wipe a well-made tear from out of your eye as you attempt to explain yourself.

“Hehe… he… sorry, it’s just… I thought you were going to say you wanted to fuck or something, with how you guys were making it out.”

> You thankfully don’t notice the adventurous glint that sparkles in Fluttershy’s eyes, her secret desire still burning with a dark passion of lust.

> She is, after all, Fluttershy.

-----

> You look at Rainbow Dash for confirmation as you draw up Fluttershy to eye level, her mouth in a “:o” shape, and making some sort of interesting noise.

> “Oooooh…”

> Rainbow shrugs, rolling her eyes as she gets off your shoulder to look away.

> “Yeah, yeah, just don’t be getting any funny ideas. This is my way of telling her ‘thank you’ for stopping me at the party.”

> You look back at Fluttershy, who’s blushing and looking at you with such gentle eyes.

> The Captain: “YAAARGH! It be a fine day t-“

> Your Brain: “*Punches in the face* FUCK YOU IM BATMAN”

> Boner denied!

> Leaning her in closer, she closes her eyes as the distance between your lips end, the sweet savory taste of her mouth on yours.

> Sadly, you’re admiring the bookshelf for the three seconds this occurs; sure, this may be hot, but… your mare is right next to you, and this is already awkward.

> Separating yourself from her, you lay her back on her respective side of the couch.

“There, hopefully you can live off of that, now that your curiosity has been quelled.”

> “Mmm…”

> How little you knew.

> Trying to relax, you realize something peculiar, your brain not comprehending the fact.

“Why are the windows closed? Are you trying to hiding me or something?”

> Fluttershy: “Anon, it’s nighttime, almost three in the morning.”

> Well shit!

> Rainbow Dash: “Some of the ponies saw us taking you to Twilight, and word may have gotten out, but we tried being as discreet as possible. However, I don’t think anyone knows about the-”

> Ladies and Gentleman of the jury, have you ever seen the Harry Potter movies, read the books?

> Do you remember the times where wizards and witches alike would apparate, and appear somewhere else?

> They described it as precisely as you could, but you gotta admit:

> You don’t care how they tried to explain it; they were WRONG. Teleportation feels weird as fuck.

> …

“The… fuuuck?”

> You’re no longer in Fluttershy’s house.

> Now, you would like to point out that you’re still on the couch, but two things are abruptly changed in the setting.

> The first: Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy are not at your side anymore.

> The second: Fluttershy’s couch, as well as yourself, are now currently in the presence of Princess Celestia and Luna, in the royal chamber in Canterlot itself.

> Crossing your legs and resting an arm on the back of the couch, you try your best to act like you’re the coolest cat in the neighborhood;

“Hey, toots! Thought I’d drop in, how’s it going?”

> Luna looks up at her big sister, befuddlement written all over her.

> “Sister, you took the couch too?”

> “I was a bit too fast on the draw; I meant to grab the two pegasi as well… oh well.”

> She gives a troll face, and you wince at the look, despite being impressed.

“Did you seriously just teleport me on a couch across the kingdom? Not bad.”

> Celestia shrugs, as if she teleports couches around the world as a pastime of hers.

> “Anon, it has been a while, and although I have been trying to find and contact you, I had not sensed your consciousness until just recently to bring you in.”

“Yeah, about that… I was in a three day coma, my bad.”

> Princess Celestia raises her chin, as if elevating her nose will help her cast better judgment on you. Bitter snufflewanger.

> “You’ve been in a coma for much longer than that, I’m sure, but yes, I understand you’ve been resting these past couple days.”

> Your face just contorts like you just shat a large brick. How in Pat Sajak’s margarita fest does she even- oh. OH.

“I take it Twilight has been filling you in with some interesting letters.”

> Luna is frowning sincerely, as Celestia gives a somewhat kind nod.

> “Yes, as my faithful student, she has confide in my almost everything. This one of two things as for why I brought you here.”

> Laying back on the couch now, you realize you probably look like an arrogant fuck to the princesses.

> The guards seem to agree, shifting uneasily in their places. You dare them to complain.

“Alright, so you know my problem.”

> Luna: “Why didn’t you tell us, Anon? You saw me after you knew, why didn’t you warn us?”

> Straightening back up just as quickly, you stand up in a level manner, turn around, and give the couch a small push.

> Now, by push, you shoved the damn thing halfway down the hall, sliding like it stole candy from a child and Deadpool is chasing after it.

> Neither princess said a word, as you compose yourself and turn around elegantly.

“Why? Why, you ask?”

> Celestia: “Yes, why?”

“Because it was none of your business. Your concept of this world will soon collapse; you’re probably realizing a lot more than you should.”

> Celestia: “Guards.”

> Two hundred burly armored guards surround you, ready to beat you into submission for disrespecting the Princesses.

> “Oh. Err… I’d like you all to wait outside. I need a little privacy here.”

> They all look at Celestia disappointedly, and quietly shuffle out of the hall, the door closing behind them.

> “Now, go on?”

-----

> In another void of the world, Death is sitting at the table, alone.

> To be honest, it cannot be told if he’s very lonely, or extremely pissed; he slumps over the table, his fist holding up his frigid skull.

> His plans have dun goofed; the people he organized so neatly and professionally to kill you just felled apart just as quickly as it was collaborated.

> Now that they’re all dead, by your hand or his for their failure he lost the ambition he has had this entire time.

> “I can’t fucking believe this… this isn’t even psychologically possible, how is HE able to defeat ME. Now ‘that thing’ is going batshit crazy on the surface, and Anon is going to end up truly insane before he goes kaput. I WILL kill that fucker before that damn thing does. Still…”

> He stands up and opens a portal to Equestria.

> Landing on the outside of your moonlit garden, scythe in hand, he now stands before hundreds of gnomes, all staring at him in the darkness of the night.

> “I know who and what you are, you little bastards. We may have fought before, but you’ve changed sides now, haven’t you? He hurt one of you, and no true friend would kill an innocent little gnome.”

> Their eyes glisten in response, acknowledging his statement.

> “Your master is coming here soon, but you need to be ready for when he gets here! We need to capture Anon, so he may be ready for your lord. Shall we work together?”

> He raises his hands in a fatherly way, offering it to anyone who will take it.

> After a moment of silence, one slowly grinds its stone arm up in a salute of some sort.

-----

> [The Heretic Must Be Captured.]

-----

> Soon all of them are making the same grinding sound, like a large boulder being attacked by mountain climbing stones.

> Before long, all of them are hailing their new leader, and Death begins to laugh hysterically.

-----

> [All Hail Lord Death! All Hail the God of Fright!]

-----

> Back at the palace, it’s now just the three of you; Celestia, Luna, and yours truly.

> It appears that they know everything, and they’re very upset about it- especially Celestia.

> Luna appears to be upset because you’re dying, while her sister is raging because her kingdom is soon to die.

> Gotta love ambition, huh?

“Look, I’m sure you know now, that as far as I’m concerned, my will has created this world. I know you don’t like it, but if and when I die, this place may go with m-“

> “Bullshit.”

> You blink. Who said that?

> You look at Luna blankly, only to find her staring at Celestia, who is in turn glaring at innocent little you.

> “B-big… sister?”

> “Anon, as your ruler and leader of this world, what you’re saying is heresy and condemnable. Tell me the truth, or I WILL punish you.”

> That shuts you right the hell up. You suddenly notice there’s something about her that strikes you off as odd, but you can’t put your finger on it.

> She seems like a discolored dick. However, it does not stop Luna from defending you.

> “Tia! You know he’s speaking the truth, why would he have any reason to lie to us?”

> Celestia turns her head in a way that only she can, beaming down at her baby sister with daggers.

> “Luna, I don’t want your say in any of this, I just want you to hear the truth come out of him. After your extravaganza fiasco in Artemare, the fact you let two prisoners escape, and perhaps the little note where you did not ASK if any of this was allowed in the first place,”

> “But, big sister, I-“

> “Shut it, Luna. I am sick of you trying to meddle in things you don’t understand, and every time you do, you act like an immature brat that doesn’t understand duty.”

> Seems like a family counselor is needed here, geez. You’re at a loss of words to say at Celestia’s accusations, not to mention her harsh words towards Luna.

> Luna continues on diligently, though.

> “Tia, I am sick of you not seeing the point, and you’re taking this deal with Anon too far, and you really need t-“

> Celestia, in one cruel move, struck Luna with the side of her hoof, knocking her back on the floor near you.

“LUNA!”

> You run to her aid, only to be forcibly lifted off your feet, and swept into a pillar by Tia’s magic.

> Crumpling over in pain, you take a while to get to your feet.

> “You stay out of this, traitor. This is a personal matter between me and her.”

> She prances down like she’s the pony version of Lady Gaga, and struts her merry way down to her beaten sister.

> “Listen, you. Sis… you’re overstepping your bounds, and while I’m sorry I hit you, you really deserved it for believing this guy. He doesn’t know how this world works, and to come around and exclaim he’s some god or something to us, is insulting, very insulting.”

> Luna, her eye swollen shut, is crying, and you’re left to clutch the pain in your chest.

> “A…Anon… I believe him…”

> Celestia’s face could not have been more deformed in her rage.

> “Very well, perhaps if you wish to be blind to the truth of the world, I’ll make you blind myself!”

> She lifts her hoof once more to give the final blow, only to swing onto a thick sheet of blessed steel, launched into the pillar next to them and covering Luna.

> “What… the…?”

“Ashbringer, PROTECT HER!”

> The holy sword, with the sacred orb of justice glowing with an aura of intense power, emanates a force that shoves Celestia into the air, forcing her to retreat to the throne.

> A light blue atmosphere envelopes around Luna, as you make your way into it, pulling out the heavenly sword and helping her up.

> Luna: “Anon, I don’t know what is with her… she wanted to help before, but she’s acting…”

“Weird, I noticed that. I know she could be a bitch, but there’s something about her is off putting. Will you be alright?”

> “Yeah, I’m just shocked… Tia never hit me before.”

“Yeah, well, don’t be looking for an apology right now, she looks pretty pissed.”

> Stabbing the sword in the ground and leaving Luna to be protected, you exit the magical barrier to face the decently upset alicorn before you.

> You examine the way she frowns in a way that she never has done before, her pupils are dilated and small; she has an odd gr-

> A grayscale tint. You see.

“Princess Celestia, we need to talk.”

> She riles up some vicious magic and fires it at you, and you deflect it with a slap of your hand effortlessly, crashing the power into a now devastated pillar.

> “W-WHAT!? How… how can this…?”

“Celestia, you’re not yourself; you are a kind and loving ruler, and above all, you showed me a kindness that only you could give.”

> You climb up the stairs towards her, and she wrings out her wings, using her magic to send you hurdling away.

> You aren’t even affected anymore. You never really believed that was real, anyways.

> “Get… get AWAY FROM ME!”

> You’re within feet of her now, and for the first time ever, she actually attempts to gore you with her horn.

> She was pretty close to doing it, too, grazing your shoulder as you duck under her.

> Ignoring the rapping pain from the blow, you grapple around the neck-

> And embrace her in the tightest hug you can muster, as she tries to wiggle out of your reach.

> “Ugh! Let go of me, you traitor! You try to split me from my sister, my kingdom, my life! You ruined everything for me, if everything you said was true!”

> You take the blows word-by-word, knowing full well that, while it may have not been your fault, you are the sole cause for her anguish that she and every pony that knows will suffer.

> Yet you still hug her, despite her defiance, and soon her writhing motions trail down to angry whimpers.

“Celestia,”

> Your hands on the back of her neck begin to glow with the magic of love and friendship, and her original color began to flow back.

“Remember what you said to me. You said you would always be there for me, when no one else was. I need you to believe me, Tia. I need your help.”

> She mumbles senselessly, and after finally turning back to herself, she collapses with your arms still around her. She’s trying hold back tears for what she just did.

“It’s alright to cry, ‘yourself forbid’ that crying every once in a while is not ok.”

> And she did cry, for several minutes, Luna coming in to join in the warm embrace.

> “Luna, Anon… I’m so sorry… I don’t know what happened… I was in such shock when I heard all of this, and I was confused and flustered and… I even hit my own baby sister, what kind of person am I?”

> “It’s ok, Tia, you weren’t yourself, you’re better now…”

> “But I still did it and-!”

“You did not hit Luna, Celestia. Someone else did.”

> Everyone went quiet. You swear you felt the presence of a fourth person listening in, the hair on the back of your neck.

“Only one person is as marvelously mischievous and disorderly to force a mare to hurt her own sister. Isn’t that right, Discord?”

> A voice echoes across the halls of alluring silver tones, made and baked with riddles and mystery.

> “My, my, what-a-surprise! To think I would be ratted out so easily, I need to admit, I must be losing my touch. Here, have a ribbon, you’ve won yourself first place!”

> An overly large blue ribbon appears in front of you, with Discords winking face.

> Pinning it on without question, you begin your demands.

“Discord, show yourself.”

> “Now, what good would that do any of you, and what would I benefit in return?”

“All the chaos that’s occurring must have freed you from your prison, but you know very well I have the power to put you back in your place.”

> Discord’s face burst out of the ribbon, the Draconequus bowing down to the three of you.

> Thoughts and questions are pounding in your head as what to do, and the Princesses must be doing the same thing, because Discord groans with boredom and rolls his eyes.

> He points at Celestia, and begins answering the questions rolling in her head.

> “You first. Yes, I made you hit her; yes, I escaped; yes, I’m Discord; no, the Elements of Harmony and that lovely little group of mares can’t stop me this time; yes, Anon said he can seal me, but I hardly believe he would.”

> He points at Luna.

> “Yes, I’m Discord; no, I won’t apologize; no, I am not the cause for that THING that is out there,”

> Apparently Luna (and presumably Celestia) knows about the terrifying creature slowly expanding its horrors around the world.

> “No, I could not stop it, but yes, I can assist, provided I am willing to- I could help this lovely fellow,”

> He phases behind you and pats your shoulder, and relocates on top of the throne.

> “And finally, yes, but I won’t be explaining the answer to that one~”

> He points at you, ending your barrage of silently asked questions.

> “I don’t know why you’re here; no, I won’t ‘kill you now’; yes, I do, in fact, have some business of relation with you; no, I don’t drink regular milk; and finally, and I do mean finally, yes, I have come here to talk.”

> He waves his hands at the two glaring Alicorns, and you can’t help but smirk and cross your arms at the guy.

> This guy might be supposedly evil, but he’s pretty humorous in his own right, as he gives his own grin.

> “No more, Princesses, please! I get chocked into a statue for a good while, and the first thing you do is nag my ears off!”

> His ears literally popped off at this point; catching them both midair and screwing them back in, you start laughing like this guy is secretly a combination of the Joker and Ralphie May.

> Luna and Celestia both turn to look at you with disbelief, eyes wide at your hearty chuckle.

> Tia: “Anon! You should know that this monster ruined pony live for hundreds, thousands of years!”

“The guy landed a good joke, I’m sorry if I can’t laugh!”

> Discord positively beams at you, like a professor who has a student that answered his question just the way he wanted them to.

> He poofs next to you, and lays an arm on your bleeding shoulder.

> You twinge, surprised that the cut hasn’t healed yet, and Discord takes a look.

> “Oh, wow! Tia here sure did take a nice chunk out of ya, huh! She always had a thing for wanting a bit of… exotic creatures.”

> He winks at a furious Celestia, and without further impromptu, he heals your wound, back to normal.

“Oh, err, thanks. I don’t suppose I owe you anything for that?”

> He waves his hands dismissively at you.

> “Not at all, not at all! If I wanted something, I would have bargained with you. I just wanted to show that I mean no harm for now.”

> He pulls out a white handkerchief and waves it around like a maiden in distress, and you can’t help but chuckle. Luna and Celestia are not amused.

> “Well, I’m glad someone here has a good taste of humor.”

“Alright, but you really do have me pretty skeptical, considering you called me a freak after that show with Fluttershy.”

> “Oh come now, Anon- may I call you Anon? It was just a good spark of fun, and it was a chance for you to use some skills! Do you honestly think that it didn’t help you in the end?”

“I want to say you’re right, and perhaps ultimately you are, but you nearly had me kill Fluttershy, and you wrecked her mind for the longest time. That alone is something I won’t be forgiving you for anytime soon.”

> He shrugs, the idea of a “little” sacrifice too menial for his concerns.

“However, this is something that has been bugging me.”

> You still remember Death’s little slip when you fought him, his voice almost identical to Discord when he was picking on you. Upon thinking this, Discord pulls up the couch, lays down on it, and gives the biggest Cheshire Cat smile you have ever witnessed.

> “You’re almost right on the mark. I’ll give you three questions, and I won’t even read your mind. I’ll answer honestly, if, and only if, you agree to one little term.”

“Name it.”

> He clears his throat almost comically, and recites a cute little riddle for your mind to chew on.

> “I need you to bring a normal, boring object to me,”

> “That is something obtainable, and that you can see.”

> You frown at the ridiculous statement.

“That’s it?”

> “It’s quite harder than you might think. You may try as many times as you like.”

“That couch.”

> He taps the couch and turns it hot pink, with a chocolate milk dispenser to boot.

> “This is piquing my interest, not nearly boring at all!”

“Princess Celestia.”

> Tia: “Oh come on, that’s not even funny!”

> Discord seemed to find the small joke hilarious, pounding the arm of the furniture; he time he does so, it changes a different color.

> “Try again.”

> You walk up to Discord, giving him a half assed glance, and sit down.

> He looks interested as to what you’re doing, and you begin silently sitting there, clearing your mind and thought.

> Your chest decides that this is a good point to seize up on you, and you spend a good moment or three trying to ride it out.

> Luna and Celestia, not sure as to intervene with this awkward meeting, or to simply sit back and relax, both vote to do the latter and promptly sit on their plots to survey the silence.

> Back into a Zen state, you politely stare (which is very possible given the right circumstances) at Discord, who is attempting to mimic the notion.

> He gives an unsatisfied yawn.

“You find my presence uninteresting?”

> “Posh, you’re as dry as a stump in summer!”

“Then I present to you, me.”

> Thinking about it, he smirks and stands up in defeat.

> “Well, I guess I do deserve that for issuing such a lame challenge, huh? Would you like some chocolate milk?”

“Not really, I want answers.”

> He shrugs and pulls out two glasses anyways, settling the second near you. You take it and have a nice swig.

“Alright, first question. Are you Death or related to death, and if so, explain.”

> He chuckles, snapping his fingers and returning the couch to its normal, although now purple, state.

> “That sounds like two questions, but only for you I’ll let it slide. Yes, I am, and yet no I’m not.”

“That’s where you explain yourself.”

> He snaps his finger, and you’re immediately teleported to him to what appears to be…

“What, are you delving into my memories, now? That’s not rude at all.”

> “Well, consider this area more of a ‘public viewing area’, if you catch my drift.”

> You’re in the dark void where you fought Death, and he’s RIGHT there.

> Although you were only half certain he couldn’t see you, you comfort yourself to find your past self holding on a very nasty wound.

“I didn’t even think it looked that bad.”

> “Nothing looks bad if you look at it the right way; take me, for example!”

“All in the eyes of who sees it, I suppose.”

> He grunts in consent, as you witness the scene before you.

> Your old self is breathing heavily, grasping at both straws to escape, and the gaping wound in your shoulder.

> “Now this is a sight! Poor, POOR Anon! Trying to run from my fucking grasp of death, like an ant trying to run from a size 13 sneaker. Truly splendid!”

> You remember much clearly now.

> “What… are you… Death… and Discord, now?”

> You watch as Death covers his mouth, as if he had made a mistake. Turning to what appears to be an annoyed Discord, you watch him seethe at the impression Death left you with.

“Mind explaining that?”

> Crossing his arms, both of you suddenly return to the couch, and he points out a small fact.

> “I am, and that is to say very loosely, am you.”

> You raise an eyebrow at the comment, objection clearly overcasting your look.

“I’m… you. Huh.”

> “Ok, perhaps not YOU you, but I’m a part of you, a representation of sorts. Consider me your inner need to cause trouble for fun.”

“Then who is Death?”

> “He is also you. This is all you. Don’t forget that! Don’t you see the beauty of being in your head?”

“I guess I don’t, no.”

> He rolls his eyes.

> “Think! If, let’s say, you made Equestria in your memories, *who* made the characters that were never here before?”

> You ponder for only a moment, letting deductive reasoning take its course.

“I guess I did, subconsciously.”

> “There you go, there you go! Now, next: if we’re all in your head, what does that mean of the personalities of those new people?”

> Again you pause, the simplicity of the puzzle taking form.

“So, when he asked if I knew who he was, he was trying to see…?”

> He claps his hands together enthusiastically, pulling out confetti and balloon in some sort of makeshift celebration.

> “If you recognized yourself! Wonderful, your head is answering the questions before I can!”

> “Now, Discord, who the fuck said you could tell him that?”

> A black shade of a portal erupted from the floor, and your friendly local Death surfaces out of it in the usual intimidating manner.

> This is the point in your life that you would be scared shitless, considering how close he was to killing you last time; that is, if you weren’t with two Alicorns and Discord, and you give a fairly smug smile.

“Well, I was wondering when you’d show up.”

-----

> You’re now standing up, Ashbringer in your hands, and ready for a worthy fight.

> Celestia is by your side, along with Luna, ready to kick this perilous foe’s backside back to hell where he belongs.

> Discord is rocking out on the couch and enjoying his stay here, not saying a word as Death points a bony finger at him in a manner only Ph-

> Waitaminute.jpeg

> Death: “You sonuvabitch! I was waiting for him to realize what’s going on!”

> Discord: “You’re the one who messed up, ‘kiddo’! I was just answering some questions you gave him, after all!”

> Death slams his scythe into the ground crossly, cracking the stone.

> “You’ve fucked with me for the last time. I have him by rights, after all!”

> “Oh puh-lease. Are you trying to hold up the charade still?”

> Discord snaps his fingers, and Death’s hood fluffs off; before the grim looking figure could cover his barren skull back up, the king of chaos snaps ones more-

> And Death’s head blows into half, as your eyes almost blow out of their sockets in rage.

“Discord, I still wanted to talk to- oh. Well, fuck.”

> Bones shatters as they crash to the floor, the skull halves joining them.

> With the skeleton’s carcass collapsing out from the robe, it was soon replaced by flesh, human flesh.

> Your mouth drops when the skull was split, because a recognizable face appeared, the first human you’ve seen here in Equestria besides yourself;

> However, this isn’t actually the case, because… he looks like you, almost a perfect replica.

“You’re…”

> Your double standing before you, a dark grin on his face that contorts with his mouth. This can’t be you, what is this?

> “Yes, I am you. I’m your super ego, given form in this fucking hell, and I’m here to kill you.”

-----

“My mind is so full of fuck right now.”

> “Let clarify this to you then, asshat: you’re the consciousness of this so called ‘Equestria’. Discord is… I don’t even know what the fuck he is.”

> “I’m a Draconequus, I’m part-“

> “I KNOW THAT. You’re just as fucked up as this guy!”

> You feel livid at this accusation.

“If you’re me, you're quite offensive about it.”

> Your clone, this twisted… TULPA, brushes his hair arrogantly, and rests his hand on his face; he eyes you hungrily with a single unemotional, calculating pupil.

> “You’re nothing but a disgrace to me.”

> Ouch.

> “I am perfection, I am complete; if you listened to me more often in your life, you wouldn’t even be in this mess. You would have become as supreme as myself, and I wouldn’t have to kill you.”

“Why would you kill me, if you know that means that you’ll perish too?”

> He mindlessly pulls out a rose from seemingly nowhere; this person…do you detail him as “you”? Is apparently just as influential in this world as you are. You shiver at the thought.

> Smelling the rose, he glances at you with a smirk.

> “Your mind is but a setting now, and I am the ruling god. However… this world has always been here for me to carve, and your pathetic influence has corrupted it to this… this disgusting place.”

> Celestia steps forward indignantly.

> “He may have made this world, but us, all of us, are thankful to him for it. Even if it means we all go with him, it was something we cherished, every moment- such is the power of love and friendship.”

> Your double ignores her entirely, the rose catching aflame as he tosses it aside, the ashes scattering to the air.

> “You know you’re going to die, Anon. This whole world might as well know. However, it tickles my fancy just the right way, if… it’s me that delivers the final blow.”

> He teleports forward in a speed much faster to your own, and before you could counter, he thrusts a palm right into your chest, sending you flying across the hall.

> The pain, usually just a stabbing jab, is much more intense than any form of agony you felt before. Your breathing is suddenly ragged, and you can’t seem to get in enough air.

> Nona, which is what you’ll humor him for the time being, is standing over you with his arms crossed.

> “In real life, your brain just collapsed your right lung. It’ll help speed up the process of this.”

“Tch… this… is nothing… my healing spell will…”

> He picks up you by the scruff of your shirt, and puts you on your feet, as you stagger a few feet away. The princesses try to come in, only to find a force field materializing between the two groups. He quietly turns back to you.

> “Your healing spell is shit to my power. While your wounds may have been healed in this world,” he clenches his fist a few times to stretch out the knuckles, “The attacks I do are a bit more… to the source, quite literally.”

> You cough furiously, spitting out blood. You’re trying your best to stop your chest from seizing up, but the lack of oxygen is making things a bit hard to work with.

> “When you’re gone, my misery to rule this place will be as well. I will finally be free of you, and exist in the great beyond.”

> He charges in for the kill just as Celestia and Luna’s magic shatters the barrier, only to find it’s too late.

> He barrels his palm right at your other side of the chest, going 2 for 2.

> You catch it with both your arms.

“I don’t care how cocky you get, punk. Don’t think you’re any better than I am.”

> You finish your point with a powerful head-butt to the face.

-----

> He goes a fair distance away, his feet dragging as he balances himself.

> You lung working somewhat properly again, although battered, Celestia and Luna join your side.

> Discord snaps his fingers, bored with the fight, and disappears right out of there.

> Luna: “Glad to know how important we are to him.”

> Discord’s Voice: “Oh, I’m sure you guys will be just fine.”

> You spit up a last bit of blood on the floor, your throat aching for water.

> It appears Nona is not taking the blow to the face lightly.

> “You dare… you dare to strike ME?! I AM YOU, THE BETTER AND SUPERIOR YOU!”

“I suppose you’re the prince of all Saiyans too, huh?”

> Tia: “…Who?”

“Well, uh… Vegeta, some arrogant and powerful prick.”

> Luna: “This guy’s name is Vegeta?”

“No-no, I was joking that he’s acting like it.”

> Celestia: “I don’t think three Vegetas would amount to this guy, he really seems to be the king of all pricks.”

“Hehe, you’re probably right.”

> Nona flips the fuck out at these petty insults, yelling in rage as you summon the fallen Ashbringer back to your side.

> “You… you…!”

> He repossesses his scythe, telepathically traveling through the air, and it glows with a bright light.

> It transforms into a sword of his own; a cold steel, woven in the cruelest of fashions, wrought with a primordial saronite and legendary skull on the hilt.

“Frostmourne and the Ashbringer; You know how it ended the last time they met.”

> “Pfft. This time will be different. ARISE, wretched minions!”

> He raises the shadowy sword in the air, and power flocks out of it, dark energy sparking from it to the ground. After a moment of this, the stone floor shatters in several places as armored zombie ponies come forth.

> The Evil League, corrupted with the gift of undeath, has been horribly transfigured into the form of death knights, forcibly bound to the evil doppelganger without a true will of their own.

> Unable to distinguish any of them from each other, they huddle around their master with ferocity of dedication that nothing but dark-bound magic could obtain.

> Celestia gasps at the sight, followed by a shriek from Luna.

> Tia: “This, this is… horrible…”

> Luna: “This is not acceptable. We need to stop them, Anon!”

> You swing your sword forward, leveling at your other self across the room, and he does the same.

“I will give these poor ponies the justice of salvation, and my words will be their blessing.”

> He grins at the phrase, and his voice finally lowers to his true vocals, a cunning and cold tone.

> “You speak of justice? I shall show you the justice to the grave then.”

> Suddenly, it appears that the guards outside have taken the initiative to see what’s the commotion was inside, and suddenly you, the princesses, and the couch was surrounded by hundreds upon hundreds of dedicated and loyal guards.

“Guys, you can’t do this, if you die-!”

> The captain of the makeshift soldiers interrupts you with a booming voice.

> “We are here to protect her highness Princess Celestia… and Princess Luna! Our hearts are guided by their words of kindness and wisdom, and we shalt protect them with our very lives!”

> They’re pretty dedicated; you’ll give them that, as he barks the first order.

> “SOLDIERS, PROTECT THE PRINCESSES! GUARDS IN FRONT!”

> “AWOO!”

-----

> It’s now you, Princess Celestia and Luna, and a ridiculously enormous army of Equestrian-turned-Spartan ponies, versus      seven death knight ponies, and quite questionably the most demonic nemesis you’ve face in your life.

> Quite ironic, really; they always say that your greatest enemy is yourself- you didn’t think they’d mean it so literally.

> “SENSATIONAL~!”

> Nona snaps his finger, and the Death Knight furthest to the right simply turns into a fragment grenade, exploding on the spot.

> “Fucking Sapphire.”

> Alright, so like you were saying, six Death Knights…

> Nona, still holding Frostmourne at level with your neck, is as serious as it gets;

> That is, until he laughed.

> It’s your laugh, almost trademark, but it’s cold, cruel; it’s one who’s committed suffering for fun, and is ready for another chance to wreak havoc.

> Gripping her courage, Celestia addresses her troops while the dark entity sits on her own throne, resting his chin on a fist.

> Celestia: “Soldiers of Equestria, this is the moment of test that you have worked so hard to face! You have trained, suffered, and come up victorious, ready to fight the most vicious of-“

> Her foe only had three words of encouragement, his crazed grin stretching with each syllable:

> “Kill them all.”

> Weaponry erupts out of the Death Knights’ armor, swords of rune origins wielded by their mouths, and they silently streak into the army, hacking into the front lines without thought or mercy.

> Screams and shouts of fear and anger came from dozens as their armor and strengths held no match to the massacre that the deadly six tore into action.

> Working together in a well-greased killing machine, no one stood a chance against them.

“Celestia, you need to get them out of there, they’re       being shredded apart!”

> “Anon, you must understand, that these soldiers know what they signed up for, they’re prepared-“

“They were NOT prepared to be slaughtered fodder for the grave! If their names can be put in vain…”

> Runes of light flash below you, as your anger of righteous envelopes you.

> A circle of alchemy materializes on the floor, as vivid markings travel up your legs, your chest, soon covering your body.

> You don’t know what the oversize George Foreman grill is going on, but you don’t even care anymore; you lack the sudden need for the constrictions of “reality”, and by surpassing its bonds, you will carve a new authenticity.

“I WILL DENY IT!”

> You launch yourself over the defending army, Ashbringer shining with brilliance of the heavens above.

> Upon leaving the casting ground you created, you generated two wings of your own to wield; representing the balance of chaos and harmony, you have the wings of both angel and demon.

> Veiled with magic that could make Trixie hit her period three days early, the world stops to watch the glorious sight of a Hero emerging.

> Even Nona, who was drinking from a goblet of some drink, drops the cup at the sight.

> “Are… are you fucking… fuck, FUCK!”

> The battle resumed when you make the first strike, crashing into one of the death knights; Ashbringer impaling the mare in two, you pin her to the floor in her final breath.

> The shockwave sends everyone into the air, taking a moment to realize what is going on.

> Your wings stretch to their full magical extension, the sight causing sinners to fall in redemption, and the worthy to stare in awe; holding the sword with one hand, you raise your other hand in the air, as a white aura travels down your arm, following the veins engraved into your skin.

> Another bright disk appears on the ground, the death knight’s eyes cowering in fear.

“BY NAYRU, BE RELEASED!”

> A white fire flares out of the Ashbringer and into her eyes and mouth, and in Cheerilee’s final moment, you hear her mutter, “thank you.”

> Nona is now standing up, furious at the horrid sight.

> “You cock-suckers, kill him!”

-----

> All five of them rush at you; three sweeping and the others take into the air.

> No time to pull out the Ashbringer, you abandon it and run up the pillar, summoning the Mirror Shield to your aid.

> Leaping off the column just as three of them obliterate into it, you slam the sacred shield into one of the Death Knight’s face midair, reeling off Spitfire’s helmet, and send her flailing into the ground.

> You catch the last one into the air and crash into the surface, their sword grazing your right arm and wing.

> Swinging your arm, you pimp smack the dark warrior in the face as if he owed you last week’s rent, and the shield flies off your arm, sailing right at Nona.

> Dodging it just in time, it chips right into the throne, missing him by inches. He grits his teeth as you and the Death Knight struggle for dominance, who turns out to be Blueblood.

> He tries to use magic to send you flying away, and despite your newly born resistance; it was powerful enough to send you both flying in opposite directions.

> Recovering just in time, the other four are abruptly all soaring through the air, seconds from crashing down on you.

“8 Trigrams,”

> You start spinning with a velocity that could contort space itself, magic swirling around you as you direct it with rapid motions of your hand.

“SIXTY-FOUR PALM!”

> A magic barrier of swiftly rotating magic surrounds you, the death knights colliding against its might and tossed aside.

> They are soon to recover, however; Blueblood is quick to join them, ready to kill you the moment you finish your attack.

> However, when the magic dissipated, you are nowhere to be found.

> Nona jerks his arms in the air in frustration, enraged at your vanishing act.

> “WHERE THE FUCK IS HE!?!”

> He spots the hole in the ground, only to be too late.

> “He’s-!”

> A HUGE cannon ruptures through the floor, arising from the rubble; with Celestia’s cutie mark on the barrel, as well as a crudely painted banana logo, it engulfs Blueblood before he could even think of dodging.

> Luna’s eyes shrinks to pinpoints, and cowers under her big sister’s arms, who comforts her with a nuzzle to Luna’s mane.

> Celestia’s face couldn’t be grinning wider at her weapon being found.

“SO BLUEBLOOD I HEARD YOU JUST FUCKING LOVE BANANAS!”

> The cannon, already charging and revving with a force that could level Ponyville, erupts with smoke and fire from the barrel, Blueblood screaming in madness as he travels to the ceiling at frightening speed.

> Destroying through a third hole in making your reentry into the hall, your wings whisk out and sweeps the Death Knights out of the way; the Fairy Bow in hand, you pull the taut string back and an arrow of light materializes, its target ready to be struck.

> “By Farore’s light, BE REDEEMED!”

> The arrow serrates the air as it tears with a fiery passion.

> Striking Blueblood squarely through the chest, he yells in anguish in his final loss before disintegrating, the ashes brushing against the ceiling before fluttering back to the room below.

> Landing back on the ground with a furious grace, the cannon returning to its resting grounds, you’re met with a single Death Knight trying to catch you off guard, sword in mouth.

> You parry the blade with Squall’s Lionheart and strike at the pony with Riku’s dark keyblade, sparring off with the double barrage of Square Enix while the other three are getting to their feet.

> The dark pony is doing extremely well, considering how agile they’re dodging and parrying both your swords.

“You’re not bad, you! However!”

> You pierce their sword with the Lionheart and fire its revolver gun to finish them off, only to ricochet off the helmet and temporarily stun them.

> Not wasting the chance, you rip the blade out of their mouth in a spinning motion, doing a vigorous 360 degree spin; the momentum of your blades swinging forward, you let them go to unleash a whirling fury at the other group before grasping the defeated Death Knight’s helmet with a single hand.

> The flailing weaponry chips and takes out two of the Death Knights, knocking them aside but otherwise leaving them unhurt; the third one manages to jump over both the blades and continues their assault.

> Your hand being cut by the beaten helm’s slicing edges, you yell with a force of Goku’s fury:

“BURNING FINGER!”

> The helmet explodes in a burst of smoke, and you jump aside in the cover of the smolder, just in time to dodge the other shadow fighter coming at you.

> The smoke clears swiftly, and your eyes widen with a terror not before; Her mane and face half scorched from the attack, Vinyl Scratch regains her composure, tears streaming down her eyes.

> “I… s-s-sorry… tch… I don’t… want to... fight, AUUUGUH!”

> She collapses, bleeding profusely, only to be forcibly brought back to her feet with a flick of Nona’s hand.

> “I don’t think you’re being given a choice, you despicable cretin.”

> You don’t even have the thought to redodge the Death Knight that you just sidestepped, screaming in the agony of Vinyl’s tears.

> Tackled cleanly in the chest into a pillar by the stallion, his helmet acts as a club of a hundred nails, flailing through the cloth and shredding your skin and muscle.

> You don’t even feel it, as you yell in the agony of Vinyl writhing in throbbing pain.

> A magic bolt fires into the attacking pony, and Luna soon takes your side.

> Falling on your hands and knees, you finally feel the stinging pain grinding every nerve in your body; your lungs are trying to take in air, only to have oxygen drive out of holes punctured into your chest. Your heart is collapsing from the perforation of the barbed spikes.

> Luna: “ANON!”

-----

> In a desperate measure, you pull out a glass bottle and crash it against your skull, shocking every single pony there. From the falling shards of glass, a little fairy starts flying around you, returning you to your feet, and restoring most of the more deadly injuries back to new.

> The aches still linger, yet it’s nothing compared to the agony of your soul, seeing Vinyl going against their will; then again, they all are.

> If you thought he was pissed before, Nona is just beside himself in a frenzy.

> “Another mother fucking life saver, what were the FUCKING CHANCES!”

> Luna: “Anon, are you going to be alright?”

> You clutch your chest, twitching still, and you’re cursing the healing spell for not restoring you fast enough.

“We… ugh! We need to free THESE PEOPLE!”

> “IT’S ‘PONIES’, YOU DUMB FUCK!”

> A dark spiraling orb of magic is suddenly fired at you before Luna or yourself could stop it.

> At the last second, another aura beam pierces it, as Celestia joins the fray.

> The captain of the guard runs to her side.

> “Princess, we’re ready to mount a second-“

> “Stand down, captain, this is a fight that only the three of us can intervene fate.”

> “But, Princess Celestia-!”

> “If you have any loyalty left to me, obey my order and retreat for now.”

> In his battered state, you could clearly he was in no condition to fight, let alone take on these menacing foes. In a hung look of defeat, he obeys his loving ruler’s wishes.

> “As you wish, m’lady.”

> She lowers her head and lifts his up, and looks him in the eyes.

> “I’ll be fine; sometimes the princess has to protect her people too.”

> Luna: “That’s right!”

> His spirit restored, he nods at the two, as well as you, and takes his leave.

> “Be sure to teach him not to mess with Equestria again!”

“Damn right we will- UGH!”

> You swat the dark globule of energy that Nona fires again away, smacking the nearest Death Knight right in the face, destroying their head covering to reveal that the victim is the GREAT and DEAD Trixie.

> “God DAMN you! You are most mother fucking persistent piece of shit I have EVER had the misfortune to meet!”

> Nona appears to have adopted the physical persona of the King of Evil, now equipped with a cape and floating rhythmically in the air.

“You know, people might like you more if you weren’t so vulgar, dude!”

> “I DON’T GIVE A FLYING FUCK, I AM A GOD!”

> You shoot two thumbs up as the princesses roll their eyes.

“Cool story, bro!”

-----

> The now four Death Knights gather up, ready to overwhelm your defiant group of three.

> “GET THEM!”

> The dark quad begin to charge forward, or so they thought-

> “N…no…NO!”

> They stop to face Vinyl, who’s crouched down in a battle of wills with Nona’s dominating presence.

> Your malicious double smirks, gives a small chuckle at the joke, and returns to his straight face. He softly raises his hand at her.

> “Beg your pardon?”

> “I… I won’t…!”

> He tenses his palm, and she screams in anguish, her mind being flailed with a thousand whips into submission.

> Your wings flare out in rage, and you charge forward to stop this heinous evil.

“VINYL! Tia, Luna, cover me!”

> “Stop HIM!”

> As he holds Vinyl in place, the other three assail you in a very tight formation.

> You manage to avoid Trixie entirely, but the second death knight forces you to fly over it, and with the third one below you and ready to slice off your legs, you pull out both Soul Edge and Soul Calibur to obliterate the opponent’s weapon in a gyrating frenzy.

> Slamming onto your feet and recoiling on a knee, Vinyl’s screams revitalizes you to make your assault to free her mind from the laughing possessor.

> You swear you can see the chains extending from her to Nona’s hand, and you swing back both your mighty swords.

> “Wait, WHAT!?”

“GHHHHYAAA!”

> Swinging both of the powerful blades down on the chain, it almost instantaneously shatters, liberating Vinyl from her throes of compliance.

-----

> In a maddened rage, you slam both of the swords into the stone floor and catch Vinyl in time, her armor cutting into your arms as you fly up to an alcove far up on a wall.

> You don’t even care, the chance to actually not be attacked or killed by her makes the day worth it.

> You lower her to her hooves, gashes in your arm making you look like you’ve turned into a masochist.

> You know what? Fuck it; you might as well be a bloody masochist with the entire crazy funk you’ve driven yourself into.

“Tch… are you alright?”

> Her eyes, a pale red compared to the bright blaze that once stood in her pupils, sheens as she tries to cry once more, only to find that her eyes had no more liquid to surrender.

> Her face is livid after the fiery assault you pull on her earlier, and you grimace at what you did to her.

> “Y-yeah… I’m, I’m just… I’m so sorry.”

“So am I, I should have realized something was up the first time we fought. Vinyl, I need your help, this guy is vicious.”

> She tosses her faded mane to the side in some sort of way to show she’s confident in helping you.

> “That fucker has bound me for the last time.”

> You summon her personal goggles; putting them on, she looks pretty badass in them with her dark iron armor.

> You hear a fight going on below, and you nod at her before launching yourself over the ledge, her soon following you.

-----

> Luna and Celestia are using their magic to pick up a couple rune blades and fending off the three remaining Death Knights, all the meanwhile deflecting the energy blasts launched by a floating Nona.

“You fuckers forget about me?”

> They turn around just in time to witness you swinging the Megaton hammer like a golf club, sending Trixie sailing into the air for Vinyl to handle.

> You duck just in time to have the tip of your hair shaved off by a blade, and you do a side swing this time, taking the side of Spitfire’s armor and crushing her wing, sending her careening into a pillar.

> With the only Death Knight with a helmet left, you pull out a simple steel wrought tablespoon to stop the blade from connecting with your face; using your other hand to run it past your eye, you call forth your Geass upon Filthy Rich.

“Anon Vi Equestria commands you to be redeemed in the light, and explode in a burst of confetti!”

> “Yes, your highness!” Filthy Rich said, and despite the sheer preposterousness of it, he glows in a white aura and detonates in a puff of shredded paper.

> You turn to look at the Princesses, both tired with their extensive magic use.

“You two lovely mares doing alright?”

> Tia: “I could use some tea right now.”

> Luna: “These fuckers are crazy!”

> Tia gapes at Luna in confusion, and you nonchalantly shrug.

“Congrats, you just realized your sister is more vulgar than Mr. ‘I’m Awesome’ over there. Excuse me while I help Vinyl out over here!”

> You pull out the Master Sword, and go to meet Vinyl, who’s having minor difficulty trying to match the movements of Trixie and Spitfire’s sword movements.

> The runeblade knocked out of her mouth, you barely make it in time to fend off the two blades coming down on her.

“Thanks for keeping them busy, are you gonna be alright?”

> “This is… nothing!”

> Being undead, it must be hard to get tired.

> You push the Master Sword to repel their attacks, and kick Trixie’s face right in.

> Yeah, it was a dick move, and she sure and hell didn’t like that; dropping her sword in blind fury, she now apparently remembers she’s a unicorn and uses her magic to give not one, but three swords a life of their own.

> It just so happens that Soul Edge is one of them.

> Nona: “Oh, that’s just too fucking rich, haha!”

> You pull out The Rebellion in one hand, and with the Master Sword in the other, you swing in unison with Luna and Celestia’s smooth swipes, countering Spitfire’s aggressive motions and the wild jabs of the three animated blades.

> The epic finale of two Death Knights and three heroic fighters is enough to amuse Nona out of his limitless fury.

> “I should have known that when it comes to brute force… let see what else… can I do… this scum… has ruined my life, my existence… he will pay…”

-----

> In one fell swoop, Dante’s wicked blade was whisked out of your hand with a poorly guided swing; but in the lure of Spitfire knocking the sword out of your possession, it left her open for the Master Sword to pierce her armor, along with Vinyl’s own steel as she rejoins the fight.

> Placing your left hand on your weapon arm, you fire holy energy through the Bane of Evil to engulf the tormented Death Knight in sacred light.

“IN DIN BE CONVERTED TO REDEMPTION!”

> Spitfire bursts in shards of light, joining the Great Beyond once more.

> However, in the time you performed the ritual, Trixie manages to make her way with her three demonic weapons, and turning to face the final foe, your midriff is met with the chaotic metal of Soul Edge.

> Jabbing under the ribcage, Vinyl, Luna, and Celestia’s swords lock into the evil blades’ hilts to stop it from going any further, but the damage is done as you fall back from the fatal blow.

> “Anon…”

> “Anon!”

> “ANON, NO!”

> The three take place in front of you, as Trixie gives a cold hearted laugh to match Nona’s.

> He settles himself on the cheerful throne, lazily lounging on it in a smug pose.

> “You should have realized this was going to happen.”

> You feel the blood draining out of you, and despite the healing spell barely putting you intact, you feel the agony of organs failing.

> “You feel that, Anon? That’s your left kidney failing in your body. They’re going to be performing surgery on you soon, but they know just as well as you do that it’s going to be in vain, considering your time left.”

> You slowly feel the weight of these words, your body much feebler than it ever was before.

> Your wings withering away to nonexistence, you rest standing on your knees, the blade of light still in your hand; your arms grow heavy, exhausted even, and your legs decided to no longer work.

> Your lungs take more and more effort to work, as your progression to stand slows to a sluggish motion.

> “Look at you… you can barely stand. Your physical presence in the real world is finally taking its toll with your mental presence, as you steadily evolve into a dead man walking.”

> White and black wings block your presence from Trixie and your corrupted double, much to their chagrin.

> Celestia: “Ignore what this fool says, Anon. Only lies can come out of a twisted copy- he’s nothing but a lie about yourself, given form.”

> Luna: “This chump’s nothing on you, Anon!”

> Using the Master Sword to prop yourself up, you feel the energy you wielded so wondrously fade away in a puff of smoke, and you return to your somewhat fragile form.

“He’s… right. I’m losing against myself as I speak. I’m running… out of time.”

> Vinyl Scratch looks at you defiantly.

> “You’ve got too much time on your hands, and it’s ticking away from you-“

“Ticking away from me.”

-----

> You gather whatever willpower you have left to pull yourself into a battle stance, the Master Sword ready to strike holy justice.

> Trixie, bleeding whatever blood is left in her through her face from that kick, is grinning with broken teeth and purple lips; on the plus side, she looks a lot better now than before.

> You decide that enough is enough; there will not be any more bloodshed of your friends here, and you’ll finish this in one move.

“It’s time, to SHINE!”

> You raise the Master Sword to the skies, and it illuminates with a radiance, blinding everyone in the room.

> Time literally slowed at your whim when you hurdled over the Princesses and Vinyl, crashing into the floor.

> Rolling with the injury, you fiercely charge forward, the blade of the chosen hero at your side.

> Avoiding the three blades with ease, you sweep between each weapon, using the Master Sword to shatter the final of the rune blades.

> You could see the realization of her demise dawning on her face, her darkened eyes solemn with defeat.

> Every single pony and person plays witness as you pierce your blade through her torso, bracing her into the air as she silently smiles at the salvation of death.

> “Guess… Trixie lost... again… beat that guy for me…”

“Your death will not be for naught. REDEEM!”

> She erupts into light, evaporating into nothing; a last sneer is left on her crooked face as she leaves the world.

> You fall to your knees again, your chest throbbing with the use of energy you don’t have.

> The swords on the ground fading away with the last of your efforts, you’re hacking up blood like it’s a pastime of yours.

“Ugh… you’d think I’d get used to bending reality, it’s really a pain in the ass.”

----

> Nona, silently watching all of this unfold, has been quiet the entire time since you have been wrapping up this fight.

> Standing up with an air of importance, he golf claps at your victories, while you’re still hacking up whatever fluids are caught in your lungs.

> “Bravo, bravo, I suppose I should expect no less from you, despite being a complete and utter imbecile.”

“Ugh… yeah… how’d you like that, kiddo?”

> He smirks at you using his term of endearment.

> “You know I’m just burning time, right?”

> You figured this, of course, considering that you have almost everything against you.

> Celestia is the first to step towards him.

> “This game has gone far enough; I think it’s time for you to give up.”

> He brushes his suave hair back at the thought, and points out something a tad remarkable.

> “I’m a part of him; unless he dies… I can’t perish, myself. The gruff price of omnipotence, I suppose.”

> Celestia summons her powerful magic, and chains erupt around Nona, balling and bounding him where he stands.

> He gives an annoyed look that almost fits Frieza perfectly, and you groan at Celestia’s attempt to incarcerate him.

> “If we can’t kill you, we’ll hold you prison in Article 14, by rights of-“

“Celestia, that’s not going to work, even if I do it.”

> He lifts a now intangible hand out of the chains at you in acknowledgement, much to the shock of the three ponies.

> “See? This fucker gets it, why can’t you asshats follow suit? He can control reality; I can too, understand?”

> In a blink of an eye, the chains are gone, instead wrapping Celestia in her own tools of binding.

> “Ugh!”

> “Big sister!”

-----

> “If you fuckers haven’t realized it, I could decimate this whole bloody world in an instant. Anon here would resurrect it back, of course, but it would be a battle of attrition and annoyance destroying and creating it back up until he dies; that is, if he even has enough strength to do so.”

> He looks at you, and you apparently are a sorry sight; bloodied with scars and wounds, your clothes shredded, an arm limp after giving out- you’re not exactly equipped with the power to create entire worlds.

> He nods to you in some form of mock respect, and snaps his fingers, disappearing in a small explosion of twilight shards.

> His voice booms across the hall, clear as day.

> “That ugly ass god creature thing will be here in a few short hours. When that happens, everything will be over, like it or not. I’ll be in the garden outside, waiting for you; you have five minutes to say ciao to your imaginary friends to come down here and plead for an effortless death, before I abolish this entire spatial entity. Got that, dumbfuck?”

> The voice fades away, and you collapse into the arms of a battered Vinyl Scratch.

> “Come on, you need to hang in there!”

“You’re awfully close for a random foe/acquaintance, Vinyl… akugh!”

> You finally vomit, blood and other unmentionable bile repulsively subsiding across the floor. It appears Vinyl doesn’t give a flying fuck, considering she’s undead.

> Princess Luna and Celestia cringe at the sickening sight of you being like this, but they approach you nonetheless.

> Luna is courteous enough to remove the, err, extraneous fluids you gave out.

> Luna: “Anon, he’s going to kill you, you can’t go out there.”

“I’m going to kill me at this rate… I need a cigarette.”

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MN_WgwEmRaw

> Tia: “I don’t know what that is, but more importantly, we need a miracle. Unless you suggest we all accept fate and count our prayers right now?”

> Luna: “We can’t just accept death, we need to fight! Isn’t that… right?”

> Vinyl hangs her head down on your shoulder, not wanting much from the conversation.

> “I guess I don’t care what happens, I’m already… dead. But I’ll follow Anon to whatever he decides to do.”

> Silence overtakes the group, and they focus on you, trying your best to grasp a decent hold on consciousness.

> You’re trying to think; coming up with ludicrous    plans is your forte under normal circumstances, but this… this is both out of control, and entirely at your fingertips.

> Funny how you’re trying to make a timetable when the plan is just as easily able to succeed as it is to burst into flames.

> You decide to go against your body’s wishes, and with aches and bruises trying to persuade you otherwise, you get to your feet, flinching every few inches or so.

> Not knowing what will happen, the only thing that can carve fate is with your own hands, and you prepare to show the world that you'll mark your own destiny.

> This world, you fought so hard far to keep; the ponies who care for you, and you them.

> Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy… they all deserve better than this, they don’t merit the ruthless influence of providence to decide their pains, their sorrows… their joys and happiness.

> You need to show this world, YOUR world, the courage to face everything that betrays it in the eyes and simply tell it: stop, you can’t do this.

“It’s time to show that bastard what it means to threaten me… us. It’s time… to set my mind straight. Celestia, Luna, I need you to make it daytime, and do something else…

> Shit’s about to go down, yo!

-----

> Nona is chilling on a hedge, picking crud from under his fingernails, when you come before him with about thirty five seconds to spare. Vinyl is right behind you.

> “You know, if there’s two things I love and hate about you, it’s your persistence and your punctuality. Both are very commendable, yet both are just plain annoying. I suppose you were the one who changed the time of day? It was very nice out here, you know.”

“You wanted me here within five minutes, right? Well, I’m here.”

> He shrugs, still content with his nails’ cleaning session.

> “I may or may not have been fascinated in leveling this tragic world’s existence to nothing. It would have been an interesting command to try, wouldn’t you say so?”

> You stay silent, watching his every move, his patterns; he is utterly identical to you, save that leather black robe and his cold demeanor.

> That and, quite frankly, he really seems to be a bit of a douchebag.

“Don’t you get warm in that? It’s an awfully warm day out.”

> He lifts his arm to gaze at a sleeve, and then scoffs.

> “The atmospheric conditions of this place hold no meaning to me. Every sensation, whether it is pain or happiness, is entirely a figment of your imagination, which sadly I’m not really interested in being a part of.”

> Managing to recover most of your energy, although still fairly beaten up, you inaudibly give thanks to Luna and Celestia casting as many healing spells as they could.

> Although perhaps in reality it’s your body mass releasing endorphins to muffle your pain, you’ll take what you can get.

“So, as you can guess, I’m here to respond to your offer.”

> He finally finishes with his hygienic check up on his fingers, and softly floats to the grass, crossing his arms.

> “And judging by that pathetic excuse of an undead farm animal beside you, you are here to decline my offer, perhaps attempt to kill me despite the sound logic that I cannot be erased?”

“They may not be able to rid of you… but I certainly can.”

> He claps his hands in bravo.

> “Oh, that’s just simply MARVELOUS! Not only do you think you hold a candle to my power, you somehow wish to destroy me? Oh, please do tell how you plan that.”

“I won’t destroy you; you’re a part of me. However, you are commanded to remain in my head in the position you were entitled to.”

> He heckles again, wagging a finger at you. Vinyl is grinding her teeth in fury.

> “This IS your head, remember? Anything you consciously can do, I can do-“

> You tap your head enthusiastically.

“I mean here, bud.”

> His sneer straightens into a thin line on his lips, your threat obviously hitting home. He stares at you with antagonization, as if his gaze is going to provoke you to slap him with a large-mouth bass.

> “Well, I suppose in all respects, your reasoning is both absurd and sound. You still have doubts as to what I am, despite telling you that I’m your Super Ego?”

“I don’t fancy Freud or much on psychology. All I know is that you’re a version of me that is never meant to see the light of day, and you need to get back in your cage.”

> If you thought that in the last battle Nona managed to undergo anger management lessons, you were dead wrong. He flinches at the promise and writhes his arms in wrath, the ground around him exploding under his force.

> You clear back with Vinyl in tow, watching as he loses his cool like Hades on a bad day.

> You’re starting to realize all these jokes about him and things related to death are truly and ironically funny, and you chuckle at the fire bursting from out of his robes as he rampages on the spot.

> He sees you snickering, and manages to compose himself once more, pulling up his sleeves to reveal runic designs on his arms.

> “Oh ho ho, if you think this was funny…”

> He places both of his hands on the singed grass.

> “Let’s see if your gnome friends have any laugh on the matter!”

> Smoke spurts everywhere, and you cough it off as the scene before you unfolds.

> Oh, well. Looks like it’s a family reunion.

-----

> Hundreds, thousands, so many gnomes surround the entire area- castle, garden, and all.

> They are immobile, staring at you in the harshest manner you could imagine-

> Not one of them is smiling.

> They sit there expectantly, as if waiting for something to happen.

> Nona claps his hands at the marvelous sight.

> “Well, well! Your lovely ‘children’ here have wanted to have a word with you, and yet all this time you’ve been neglecting them. They told me that you even went so far as to kill one of their own over a simple mistake!”

> You grimace at this, and you walk up to the nearest gnome, sweet little #243.

> He used to be the first you saw when you leave the house, right next to the porch; he would smile at you when you left your home, and you always would give him a little pat on the head.

“Hey there, little fella. It’s been a while, huh?”

> You pick it up, and you look into its quiet, searching eyes.

> “…d…add…y…?”

“Yes, that’s right. Remember when we used to blow bubbles together?”

> Nona, impressed by the reunification, decides to add to the reminiscence.

> “Remember when he used to care about you, and then killed your big brother in cold blood, before randomly skipping off without a care in the world?”

> The gnome’s sweet and innocent black eyes, usually delving into you for the love it craves, glows into a gnawing blood red, as does every other gnome. The hair on the back of your neck rises when it speaks again:

-----

> “K̢̭̞͓͎̹͖͙̠̥͛͛̏̅ͤͥ̑̚̚͘͠Ǐ͚̣̼̝̙̟̟͛̿́͂̉L͍̣̣̼͔͇̺̏̔̃̌̓͆̄͆L̘͙̬̠ͭ͂͘ ̡͇̘̖̫̮̫̠͌̊̔Tͧ̏͊͏͎̘̳H͈͙̘̰̘̼̤̱̩͛̀̿̔̀̇Ė̡̡̛͎̮̟̖̣̼̼ͩ͛͐͗͑ͭ̀ͬͅͅ ̸̡̜͓̞̄Ṱ̤͇̘̘͚̫̦͍̋ͭ̒ͤ͌̐̍̏̉R̴̛̼̱̼͓̪̥͊͆ͧ̆A̷̛̟̞̙͆̅͆̒ͭͬI̬͖͓̫ͯͥ̈́͗T̨͈̪̭̮̒O̡ͯ͋͑ͮ̋ͬ̾҉̹̭͕̰̯͚͞R̄́҉̳̗̠̝̪̜”

-----

> You drop the gnome just as it fires a lazer, penetrating through your shoulder.

> You punt the little mofo into a hedge before it can fire off a second shot, as every single gnome turns follows its trajectory before swiftly rotating back to you.

> “Well, I told them that they were supposed to capture you, but it appears they want to turn you into Swiss cheese. Huh, who knew you had such loving children?”

> You press against your shoulder, screaming at the pain and bleeding, and Vinyl joins your side.

> “Anon, are you al-“

“WHO’S YOUR DADDY MOTHER FUCKERS!”

> They let loose both Heaven and Hell’s wrath, tens of thousands of lazers aiming at you, and smoke builds up from the heat.

> This continues for half a minute as Nona laughs the entire time, savoring the light show.

> He raises his fist, and they almost immediately stop, a single one firing a second late just for good measure as the smoke billows from the area you stood.

> “Not as funny when you’re on the receiving end of that, huh? The truth must really *burn you up*!”

> He ignores his lame joke as he awaits the smokescreen to clear up.

> “You know, when I said I was going to offer a painless death… I may have lied.”

> He shrugs it off.

> “I was considering as to how long I was going to torture you before finishing you off, but then again, I think it would have been more f-… fuh… huh?”

> As the air finally clears from the smoky obscuring sight, he finds that you’re very well intact, save that one lazer.

> A bubbly force shield, a murky blue, surrounds both you and Vinyl, preventing any major damage from striking you. You can’t help but wear a shit-eating grin at Nona’s dumbstruck face.

“I know, right? Anti-Magic Zone, standard pvp cooldown for a Death Knight. Thanks, Vinyl.”

> The barrier fades away as she nods to you, grateful to help.

> “Glad I can be of some use here.”

“And people always asked ‘why did you make a Death Knight’? Well, I hated mages with a passion, and so I-“

> “Cooldown.”

> You both pause at the interjection of a single word, proposed by Nona.

> “A two minute cooldown.”

> He grins at his own words, raising his fist in the air once more.

> The gnomes charging up for a second strike, Vinyl looks at you in panic.

> “Anon, what do we do, I can’t-“

> You hurriedly pull out a hexagonal shaped contraption, and you stand over her.

“GET DOWN!”

-----

> Pushing the button barely in time, the barrage of lazers flare at you once more, only to meet a six sided shield of blue; reflecting the lazers without any repercussions beyond the sheer chaos it brought, Slippy’s dandy reflector does it finest as lazers are repelled back on the attackers, taking out gnomes by random chance.

> Nona himself has to pull off some impressive dance moves to dodge some of the reflected energy, and he gets more and more ticked with how unsavvy his favor in the fight went.

> “Stop, STOP! You wanna play hardball, motherfucker? We’ll play hardball, then! Activate it, DISCORD!”

> As if waiting for his moment to shine, Discord appears above a fountain, saluting the enraged doppelganger below in a very humorous fashion.

> “I was wondering if I was going to be given a chance to shine! Being stuck in that statue all this time makes this kind of waiting simply DREADFUL!”

> He snaps his fingers as a dark hole of sorts forms over his head, and soon gnomes are being sucked into it with an attraction as strong as your fetish for mineshafts.

“Discord, c’mon, bro! I thought we were getting along!”

> He gives you one of those “are you fucking kidding me” looks, and gives a meager gesticulation to brush it off.

> “It’s nothing personal, I assure you, Anon! It’s just this sort of fun, this chaos~! If I can add a little to it, why not make it interesting? Just think of it as another game of sorts!”

“Fuck that shit! I want a fat cigar, a fuzzy navel, and some Faygo when I’m done with this!”

> He smirks for a moment before looking confused; now THAT’s new.

> “Fay…. What?”

> Even Nona turns to address this, as hundreds of gnomes are noisily flying into the dark mass above Discord.

> “You know, Faygo! It’s like a, well famous brand pop in the Midwest of, well, … hm.”

> Discord’s bells are clearly not being rung with this explanation from Nona.

> “Faygo… pop? You mean soda?”

“OH COME ON!”

> “OH COME ON!”

> Both you and the evil double rage at this correction, looking at each other with equally rustled jimmies.

> “Fuck it; just get the show on the road!”

> Discord smirks at his successful trolling, giving a light nod before yawning.

> “Aye-aye, Mr. Angry! I present to you,”

> The engulfed dark hole, having sucked in every last gnome, is now a dark sphere; as if something was punching from the inside, the province begins frantically bulging as if it was at boiling point.

> Suddenly and vastly growing in size, it reaches colossal proportions as it soon dwarves the fountain, the garden… the castle.

> Like a baby from the womb, a point at the top bursts through the aura, and with a splash of soap water, a freshly washed gnome almost as big as your old Gundam is now towering above, staring straight ahead.

> “Equestria’s largest statue! Most certainly not the best though, as I myself was one.”

> “Alright, motherfucker, let’s see what you can do to your biggest child!”

> You don’t know whether to laugh or be terrified at the hulking thing-

> That is, until it moved.

> Pulling its hands out of its pockets and lifting a gigantic leg, it crashes it back down to show its brute force, knocking you back on your plot to witness the sight.

> “Oh look, it’s time for my chocolate milk party with Druggie McDrugster! I do hope you enjoy the company while I’m gone, ciao~!”

> Discord randomly disappears once more, like a wanted man at the Pentagon.

> Nona gets a nice view of the giant gnome, grinning as it stretches from its slumber.

> “Now, now, do you remember what you’re supposed to do?”

-----

> “K̢̩͔̳̞̘̓͂͛̓͂͝͡Ḯ̷͔͙̞̰̳͖Ḻ̦̠̝̱͒ͮͪ̋̚͘͢͟L̸̤̼̲͉̦̭̯͕͒ͨͮ͑ͣ̓͂.̳̭̱͉̺͌ͤ̅̽”

-----

> It’s eyes shoot red at this point, turning its head to glare at you menacingly. That is pretty creepy.

> “Hey, that’s close! But no, you need to do what they call ‘capture’. Say ‘capture’!”

-----

> “K̢̩͔̳̞̘̓͂͛̓͂͝͡Ḯ̷͔͙̞̰̳͖Ḻ̦̠̝̱͒ͮͪ̋̚͘͢͟L̸̤̼̲͉̦̭̯͕͒ͨͮ͑ͣ̓͂.̳̭̱͉̺͌ͤ̅̽”

-----

> Nona doesn’t take this well, floating up to the gnome’s face.

> “Listen here, you little butt muncher, you’re going to obey me if you know what’s good fo-“

> Like a fly too flow for the swatter, he’s slapped into the ground with a mighty thrust of the colossus’s hand.

> That was great; you wish you had a camera to see this.

> “The fuck is this shit! You don’t wanna fuck with me, asshole!”

> Nona pulls out a lightsaber. Yes, an authentic Star Wars bright red lightsaber, and slashes at the monster’s leg-

> And it bounces off.

> It appears he’s just as shocked as you are, and you watch as he beats at the leg with just as much effect as a wiffle bat hoedown.

> Tossing the lightsaber aside, which cuts into the fountain as it lands, he pulls his arm back.

> “MOTHER FUCKING FALCON-“

> “PAUUUNCH!”

> This DID do something; by this, it appears Nona shattered several bones in his hand as the gnome silently stares at you.

> “Are you MOTHER FUCKING KIDDING ME. WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT!”

> The gnome’s mouth lowers to speak in its terrifying tongue.

-----

M̴̵̹̲͇̲̣̣͆̉̇ͅ,̴̘͖̺̻̯͕̥̘ͥ͑ͬ̊ͤ ̟̟ͯB̴̡͙͙̤̩̘͓̱͓ͣ̽̾́U̢̘̖̥̇͡T͖̥̱̞̤͎̅̌̓ ̞̪͙̻̳̹͉ͧͯ͋R͖̬̹̩̭̝͎̫̍͂̑̂ͤͤ̅̉̈́́Ã̫͇̩̱̭̼ͪͣT͔̱͍͆̊̓͛ͫ̑̆H͚̰̙̲ͨ̂͊͑Ȩ̢̪̠͈͎͖͎͔͒ͩ͊̃̿ͧR̴̙̉̃͋ͫ͠ ̘͖͎̞̘̞͔̩̒̇̚͝ͅI̢͕͈̮̯̞ͣ̓̄ͧͩ̃ͩͫ̾ͅM̙̤̮̳ͨ̿B̷̺̣͕͕̯̙̱̘ͨ͗̆̍͂ͦ͜I̝̱̜͎̳͎̝̲͐͑̌̓͞͠B̭̤̫̰̣̫̣̤̔ͯ̅ͮͦ́Ĕ͍͖͑̿͠ ͕̤̗̱̪̥̭͛̑ͬ̉T̵̙̩͔̮͂͗ͤ̄H̙̤̲̟̜ͥ̄ͤͮ̽̈́͊͗ͪ̀ͅË̍̿̒ͣͭ҉̟̲͙͕͎ ̡̨̤͎̻͔͖̉ͤ͐̓̔̾̊ͅF̵̮̮̝͖̜̺ͥ͑̔ͩ͒ͥ̚͠Ê̵̬̦͙̪̞̼̣̄̿͐̓̽ͣ̓̐͢Ä̶͙̤́ͦ̇ͩͧ̔̿R̵̨͇̮̺̒ͯͫ̂ ̪̙̮̮̩̽͑̀O̴̴̧͈̳̬͑̈́̀̒ͭ͛̚F̷̙̦ͯͪ͟ ̢̡̭̋ͩ̌ͬ͘I̥͕͖͎̫ͩ͋̔̈͟T̛̪̤̳͚͍̲͍͙̂́ͨ̑ͪ̚ͅS̹̤̓ͮ̊ͥ͋̂͟ ̴̨̬̼̀̑͞G̹͈̘͍̫̗̽ͨ̌ͬ̿ͩ͘͞͠L͓̳̍͑̈́ͯ̃͌̒ͩȮ̴̢͈͔̘̬̖͎̜͕͉̂ͫͬ͢R̸̭̱̫͖̘͂́͞ͅY̖̼̳̝̫͍̜̮͈ͪͮͥ͝.͎͇̅̈”

-----

> You don’t know what the hell it means, but you know two things:

> 1.) This thing is scarier than flaming rape clowns with AK-47s, and

> 2.) Your evil tulpa dude can do squat to it.

> Vinyl, even in her intimidating form, is fearful of it, cowering behind you in her gleaming yet dark armor.

> Nona, shuddering as its words, looks at you with a fierce hatred.

> “Well, what are you doing, kill it!”

“The hell? Why don’t you kill it?”

> “Because I had it made to capture you!”

“It looks like it doesn’t giving a flying feather to what you tell it! Why can’t you hurt it?!”

> He teleports closer to you, admiring it from a distance.

> “I guess I should have realized, but there’s something a bit more powerful than even me, even if it’s a bit carnal.”

“What in Sam Samson is more powerful than my inner inspirations given physical form?”

> “Your fear, Anon. You’ve fed your feelings to the fear that’s been slowly festering inside of you, and after all this time, it’s finally emerged to consume you; this thing is but a spawn, an agent of the envelopment of terror. Not that it matters for you much.”

> A knot in your stomach builds as you try to look into the thing’s eyes.

> Your beloved gnomes were… followers of chaos and fear?

> But they’re your children, why?!

“WHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!”

> “Good luck kid, I’m outta here!”

> He snaps his fingers and fluffs out, leaving you to stew in your own agony of shattered love.

-----

> “K̢̰͚͕̠͒̾ͥ̓̽̓̎́̒Ị̡͙̗̝̫̈́̆ͭ͆̿̌̕ͅL͍͎̓Ḽ̢͍͕̥̖͔̖̘̭̂͑͛͋̍̍̂ͥ!̥̪͚̖̥̖̗͕ͤ̈́͢”

-----

> The giant gnome swings its fist down upon you with a fiery hand of judgment; unable to accept the truth, you pathetically crumple at the loss of your only child.

> Vinyl is not waiting for lady luck to step in, however, as she uses her magic in vain to stop-

> Wait, it’s working.

“Vinyl, how!”

> “I… ugh… don’t know, but I can’t let it end like this! There’s so much left to… do… ugh!”

> The fist of stone is steadily lowering itself upon the two of you, fighting against the brave unicorn’s magic to slowly crush you to death.

> “I… can’t… hold it… Anon… move… please!”

“I won’t leave this spot and have you crushed!”

> “Now that’s what I call LOYALTY!”

> You turn a moment too late as you and Vinyl are brutally transferred from the attack, its fist makes its contact into the ground.

> Zipping through the air, you realize your savior by her rainbow trail left behind her.

“Jesus H Murphy, I missed you!”

> “Yeah, well, after you disappeared on the couch, Fluttershy and I went to Twilight to contact the Princess, and Princess Celestia said you were HERE, and WHOA-!”

> Unable to hold us up for too long, the three of you crash in the grass a few hundred feet away from the gnome, who’s sluggishly trying to comprehend that it didn’t crush you to pieces.

> Vinyl, have using magic to bubble herself, was perfectly fine.

> You and Rainbow, however, smear the grass like a boss, tumbling with each other.

> Snapping a finger at a wrong angle, you yell in anguish at the pain; clenching your jaw in the suffering, you try to ignore it to see if Dashie is ok.

“Dashie, DASHIE! Are you alright?”

> Taking a moment to recover, Rainbow Dash fluffs her wings out and shakes the grass and dirt off of her before posing triumphantly.

> “Of course I am, I’ve land far w- Anon, your hand!”

> You look back at the throbbing purple finger; it appears it bent against the second knuckle, and you cringe at the screaming agony with each movement. You might get it to heal if you put it back…

“Don’t look, Dashie.”

> Without argument she closes her eyes, and in one quick movement you grab the finger and snap it back the other way, nerves tearing apart as you align it. Thankfully it quickly recovers and the pain is just as bad as the usual aches.

> Rainbow, peeking to see the job done, pounces into your arms and rubs into your scarred chest.

> “Anon… what happened to you…?”

“It appears I have an evil side to me, and it’s personified itself to be the global antagonist.”

> “Err, what?”

“Evil double, looks like me, wants to kill me.”

> “And what is that?”

> She points at the giant gnome, who’s searching and kicking out hedges in a fruitless attempt to find you.

“That’s my baby boy, all grown up now.”

> “But it’s so HUGE!”

> Without a care in the world, now that Dashie is here, you grab her by her head and kiss her; not one of those goodbye kisses, or I’m-ready-for-hot-steamy-sex kisses, but rather a I’m-glad-if-I-die-today-you’ll-be-next-to-me kisses; Very romantic, very passionate.

> Dashie didn’t have any complaints, and Vinyl scratches the back of her head awkwardly.

> After you finally separate your lips from her, she looks at you with a red face.

> “I-I missed doing that.”

“Don’t worry; we’ll have time to do that later. Where are the rest of the Mane Six? I told Celestia before I came out here to send all of you.”

> She looks at you huffily, pouting somewhat to show emphasis that she’s been crossed.

> “What, I’m not good enough for this?”

> You point at the lumbering giant statue over yonder, who is currently making it his mission to shoot lazers at hedges.

“Now Rainbow, I respect that you SOMEHOW managed to evade a hundred firing gnomes last time, but this thing… it’s a whole new level, Dashie.”

> She refuses to admit it out of pride, but it appears she at least concedes the fact that this guy is one tough nooky.

> “Well, they’ll be here soon, it’s just I flew and-“

> “And Rainbow Dash rushed off before Celestia could tell us what’s going on. We’re all here now, at least.”

> Twilight and the rest of the gang are now here, in full Element of Harmony gear. Oh joy.

“I’m just letting you know now, this thing is as immune to my powers as I am to yours, if that makes any sense.”

> Twilight: “What? I thought I could lift you?”

> She tries to do so again, and while magic surrounds you, it does so with little effect.

“Yeah, after a little scuffle with Celestia, it appears I learned to cancel it out.”

> “Well, then. Looks like it’s up to us to stop it, with these!”

> She uses her magic to attach Rainbow’s Element to her neck, and they all strike a pose.

“Ladies, please, I really don’t think that is going to work…”

> Ignoring you, Twilight teleports the Mane Six in front of the giant Gnome.

> Vinyl looks at you with skepticism while she follows your sprint towards them.

> “Anon… when they use those on Discord, didn’t it turn him into a statue?”

“Yeah… huff… but I really don’t think they can seal this thing.”

> You hear Twilight shouting something at the gnome, as it turns to face the group.

> “Well, what I’m worried is… it’s already a statue, really; what would happen if they use the powers on it…?”

> Hm. If they sealed Discord into a statue, could they unseal him from a stone figurine if they used it on him again?

> But they’re about to use it on… you panic when you finally reach them.

> “…and you will see the TRUE power of Friendship!”

“Twilight, STOP-“

> You and Vinyl are knocked aside from the brute force of the Elements, while Twilight begins to hover in the air.

> Energies from them begin to coagulate into a white beam above them, and as if Neil Patrick Harris unleashed his fury, a HUGE rainbow fires into the sky, surpassing the clouds and separating them in its might.

> Making a very sharp arc, it thrusts down with a force of a nine thousand and one suns, slamming into the perplexed gnome.

-----

> “Ā̪̪ͪ̅̂̄͌͘Rͣͦ̓҉̵̢̲̹̣̯̥Ģ̘̹̞̣̭̥͎̉̈̽ͭ͞͝G̱̱̤̲̫͔̣͉̍̎ͭ̀Ǵ̷͖̜ͥ̈͑̋̋ͫ̎̒Ĝ̛͇̳̅͑ͭ̆̊̒͘͡Ḩ̘͔̣̺͇͕͚̌̔ͩ̀͠!̶̧̘̤̝̱̭͛̒̅̾̂͌ͣ͊ͪ”

-----

> Encased by the bright colors, you watch with shock as the silhouette of the gnome disintegrates into nothing.

> Looking away to save your eyes from going blind, it takes a few moments before the array of hues to fade away, and the Mane Six cheers at their victory.

> It wasn’t until you looked at the remains of the gnome to see something was entirely wrong.

> Vinyl was smiling at the sight until she realized what happened, shifting from a wide grin to that of absolute horror.

> The Mane Six were oblivious to the scene until a booming voice shook the world.

> Initiating Caps Lock;

>  “AT LAST, I HAVE BEEN FREED! FOR ALL THESE YEARS I, DESPAIR AND ANXIETY, HAVE BEEN SEALED IN THAT ACCURSED STATE!”

> Your gnome is now speaking actual English, and it appears he’s been “emancipated”.

> Well, good news, good news, huh?

-----

“So what, are you trying to tell me you’re my bottle up despair and anxiety, given gnome form?”

> “YOUR DEAD GRANDMOTHER, YOUR GUILT FROM NEVER LOVING FLUTTERSHY LIKE YOU DID THE T.V. SHOW, THE FACT YOU KILLED VINYL SCRATCH, ALL OF THESE AND MORE FED ME TO HOW I AM NOW.”

> He’s literally a real (and still huge) gnome now; the beard truly hairy, his cold red eyes beaming, his hands and fingers now wiggle with life that was not there before.

> My, how your children grow up in a blink of an eye. Wait…

“Both my Grandmothers are intact, what are you talking about?”

> He grins, his pearly white teeth shining with months of your careful cleaning.

> “YOU APPARENTLY SUPPRESSED THE MEMORY OF WHEN YOUR MOTHER TALKED TO YOU LAST.”

> Well, that is actually upsetting; both of them were the loving and kindhearted sweethearts that had cookies ready for you whenever you stopped over; the ones that slipped a Benjamin Franklin into your birthday card and hid it behind a “free drink at 7-11” coupon.

> You miss your family, and you weren’t even there as they start to pass on.

> “YESSS… LET ME FEEL YOUR SORROW, YOUR PAIN. YOUR TEARS OF BUTTHURT WILL DRIVE ME TO GREATNESS!”

> “Now wait a cotton-picking minute, here!”

> Everyone, the gnome included, turned to Applejack, who was taking off her Element in testimony.

> “Now, when Grandpa Smith passed away, everyone was devastated; he was the head of the household, and he took care of Big Mac, Applebloom, and mahself before he was gone. He was… he IS a special pony in all of our hearts.”

> You manage to hold back a tear to the saddening story.

> “Grannie Smith was broken, having him leave the world without her. But… she stood strong, and showed us that while it’s ok to cry, even if it made you look silly.”

> Rainbow and Rarity put a hoof on her as she begins to break down.

> “But she… she told us one important thing: ‘Never look at the past and regret it. Everything happens for a reason.’ And eveh since… since then, our family has never been stronger. ANON!”

> You’re now next to her, kneeling down.

“Yeah, what’s up?”

> “When you lived with us, you saw how we worked together; we were all peas in a pod, seeds in an apple; don’t ever forget my grandmuh’s words, and regret anything you’ve done.”

> A single tear falls from your face; your family, these friends, your child wanting to kill you.

> You can’t regret having met any of them, even if it ends in vain.

> Your lungs act up again, and you cover your mouth as blood spits into your hand, pouring your mouth.

“You’re… ugh… right.”

> Rainbow: “Anon…”

> You wipe the blood from your chin, standing up to face the hulking being before you, his face grinning like the sorry son of a bitch he is.

“You may be able to remind me of every single thing I’ve felt sorrow for, every single thing I shame over, but none of that matters; as of right now, since I’ve been born, since I came here, I have…”

> Your wings erupt from your back once more, brighter and grander than before.

“NO REGRETS!”

-----

> You materialize yourself in new clothes; by clothes you mean some very gaudy armor, complete with an ebony cape.

> Burnished steel with silver trimming, you pull out the weapon that you know can beat him-

> Only to find nothing in your leather gauntlets.

> “FOOL! YOU SHOULD REALIZE THAT, LIKE THE IGNORANT DOUBLE YOU FOUGHT SO HARD, I CANNOT BE VANQUISHED!”

> You look back at the seven ponies facing you, waiting for some sort of sign from you.

> You think furiously trying to think of a plan to defeat this seemingly unstoppable monster.

“Alright…”

> You cough again, the energy you using already taking it’s fee at your health. You can hardly wipe the blood with these gloves.

> “Anon… stop…”

> Rainbow Dash flies up to you, and uses her hoof to wipe the sight away from your chin. You feel helpless at the sight, as Dashie holds back tears from the blood on her hooves.

“I’m sorry, Dashie…”

> She tries to smile at you as she lands back down and wipes the grass.

> “About what? Forget about it, we need a plan!”

“I already have one. Vinyl, to my side.”

> “Gotcha!”

> Dashie: “Why can’t I do that?!”

“Applejack, put your Element back on.”

> “Alright, pardner, but…”

“Twilight, hit me with the Element’s power.”

> “Anon…”

“Don’t argue… I can say the words, but I can’t get the mindset right now; the pain is killing me, truly. I’ll work with what I have afterwards.”

> She nods, and the six nervously shift to charge up once more.

> “YOU OBLIVIOUS IGNORAMUS! HOW DARE YOU EVEN THINK THAT YOUR PETTY WORDS CAN HARNESS THE POWER TO DEFEAT ME?”

> Twilight, her eyes glowing, begins the sacred process; and for the first time, the gnome falters in his words.

> “B-BWAH! I WILL TAKE CARE OF THIS NOW! CHARGE… CHARGE…!”

> His mouth opens as energy gathers in his mouth, swiftly turning into a power to be reckoned with.

> You can soon tell this isn’t something that can be stopped by any means, logically or no; This is a dodge or die attack.

> But you can’t move, lest the Mane Six take the blow; You prep yourself for fate to supply with justice right when the beam is fired- and Vinyl jumps in front of it, her Anti-Magic Shield up.

> “IMMA FIRIN’ MAH LAZER- BWOOOOOSH!”

> The beam slams into the floating Death Knight as she takes the blunt end of the power, using her magic in the fullest extent to hold the power off.

> The Elements of Harmony fire into the skies a second time, and makes its ascent to the heavens.

> “An…on… I… can’t…”

“VINYL! Get OUT OF THE WAY!”

> You can see her smiling in grief, a tear somehow falling down her beaten face; the shield begins to crack, to your horror.

> “Funn...y… I died… fighting you… and now I… die saving… you…”

> You don’t even care if you have your pride tossed away; you start bawling and pounding on the other side of her shield, the beam ricocheting in random opposite directions.

“I won’t let you die! I CAN’T let you DIE!”

> She gathers her last effort of energy to coherently her final words.

> “I’m already dead, but at least this time I did it in redemption… it’s time I join my friends, my parents… everyone… beat him, Anon, and make sure you save as many people as you can. Goodbye, my greatest fan, and friend.”

> You yell with a voice not your own, as the Elements finally descended upon you in the flamboyant rays.

> The beam pierces Vinyl’s shield, and her; smiling through her pain, she looks at you with her trademark grin as she evaporates into the energy, her own body shielding you from the last moments of the beam.

> The world faded to white as the powers of Harmony overwhelm you,

> And that was it.

-----

> No, that was NOT IT.

> Not even close.

> Your love, your anger, your sorrow…none of them ever could take its own form like this condemned gnome or Nona-

> Yet they were their own entities by right, hidden potently within you to emerge with your being at the right moment.

> With the awe-inspiring power of friendship, the loss of a cherished pony in divine sacrifice to save you, and the hatred burning from the devastation of your own creation, you finally obtained it:

> This is your Zen state, your Kekkei Genkai; you’ve tapped into understanding with existence itself, possessing Heaven and Hell in the palm of your hands. Your armor, now a rainbow of colors, has a logo on the chestplate: “Du Pont”

> In Jeff Gordon’s honor, you’re now the Rainbow Warrior.

> When the chaotic scene ended, you did three things:

> You stopped time. It wasn’t even a conscious effort- you fucking decided that time should take a break, and it willingly agreed with your kind persuasion.

> You teleported the Mane Six to a safe distance, about half a mile away, before returning to the fight and unfreezing time.

> In the gnome’s bewilderment, you did the third thing; taking the remains of Vinyl’s goggles, you restored them, adorned them as your headpiece, and promptly proceed to kick this gnome’s ass into oblivion.

> Now, you can detail it as a fight at this point, but you’d much rather term it as a massacre; you didn’t even bother with pulling out a weapon, as Vinyl’s final will was your blade, and you treated it with the sharpest of edges.

> Kicking that bastard via his plot into the air, you defy gravity like it was optional, and you viciously continued the savage asswhooping with your feet, appearing at random angles unleash your wrath and continuously rising higher and higher.

> Your power from your emotions may have fueled you even further, but the energy consumed is killing you faster.

> You don’t even give a flying fuck- you’ve damned any fuck given the moment you fought this demon as you send the both of you hundreds of feet in the air, your wings driving your strikes harsher than the last.

> You’re soon above the clouds, and gnome tries to give a turnaround swing at you; catching it in one hand and grabbing him by the scruff of his shirt in the other, you scream in his face like a customer that lost his receipt to a broken plasma television.

“GYYYYAHHHHHHHH!”

> Your creation grows wide eyed in fear at the side of his father raging at him, his own feelings of regret coming out.

> “YOU KILLED ONE OF US- UGHRGH!”

> The Gnome’s hand you have a death grip on, stuck next to his chest, is slowly reverting back its stone state at your touch.

> “NO. NO! I WILL NOT GO BACK TO THAT INFERNAL FORM! I WON’T ALLOW IT!”

“SHUT UP! You attacked me, the one who made you! Don’t regret your LOSS!”

> Your wings extend infinitely, as ebony and silver feathers surround and bind him to you. You flip yourself with him and spiraling down to the world below.

 > His body, slowly but surely turning back to its painted rocky state, makes the giant gnome enter hysterics.

> “LISTEN! IF YOU KILL ME, YOU STILL HAVE NO CHANCE TO THE FORCE THAT’S DEVOURING THE WORLD AS WE SPEAK! NO ONE CAN STOP MY MASTER! NO ONE!”

> Your speed breaks the sound barrier as the ground looms closer; a rainbow bursts from the speed, spreading across the sky in recognizing your feat.

-----

> Rainbow: “Wow! My special some*pony can do a Sonic Rainboom too~! <3”

-----

> The gnome, half reverted to his sealed state, booms with the agony of gravity soon to engulf him.

> “NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

> You release him to the ground, but before he could reach it, energy from your wings catches him; the energy put to holding yourself in the air cracks several of your spinal columns and your shoulders dislocate from the pressure.

> You scream a bloodcurdling shout as you launch him back into the air towards you, and you harness the spirit of your fallen comrade in your right fist, charging down to unleash the final blow.

> “HIDDEN LOTUS!”

-----

> The results of your destructive attack, was, as described, very detrimental to any*pony and anything involved;

> Both you and the gnome hurdled viciously into the edge of Canterlot, destroying the boundaries and sending the debris plunging to the depths below.

 

> You slump into the grass, having taken just as much of blow as he did; turning to face what’s left of him, you see that most of him has reverted to stone, leaving only his giant head and left arm in the flesh.

> His hat flying away in the winds, he’s using the last of his strength to hold himself up, hanging on the edge for dear life.

> You attempt to stand up, only to collapse to the ground again, screaming in agony at strained, sprained, and snapped muscles.

> Blood is coming from cracks of your armor, and it appears your wings are here to stay, despite being miniatures of what they really are, hiding on your back.

> You crawl, for the first time since your first day here, and like a passionate sloth you make it to the edge, to see the gigantic gnome cursing the world for his demise before seeing you.

> You lay on your side next to his hand, silently watching him heave, trying to will the pain of your wounds to go away.

> You can hear the Mane Six rushing to the scene, but you wanted to end this before they get here.

> “ANON… PLEASE. WE CAN WORK THINGS OUT. IT DOESN’T HAVE TO END THIS WAY… I WILL CRUSH YOU IN A WAY THAT YOU WON’T FEEL A THING, AND SPARE YOU FROM MY MASTER’S TERRIFYING GAZE.”

>You roll your eyes, twitching as if doing even that sought you great agony.

“Dude, you need to chill; all this talk about despair and shit can REALLY put a weight on your shoulders.”

> You place your hand on his tenderly.

“Let me lighten your burden, my son.”

> Your contact with him returns his hand back to his original form, and it swiftly reaches to part of his ancient face before you let go.

> “DAMN YOU! Damn… YOU!”

> The destroyed foundation that the colossus was hanging from could not bear the weight of the hanging gnome, and before you realize what was happening, you’re crashing off the debris with him, sailing to the ground miles below.

> The immobile gnome, with a single eye to witness the world, gives a great booming yell as he hurdles to the ground, his out reached arm breaking off from a passing rock.

> Soon following him, you try halfheartedly try to stretch your wings, only to find them refusing to work. Of course they won’t work in the critical moments you need them to.

> Blood loss making you hazy, you feel the lightheaded feeling overtaking you as you surrender yourself to destiny.

> But if you go, this world, and everyone in it…

“AUUUUUUUUGH!”

> Thankfully destiny is intervened after a few hundred meters as a purple bubble appears around you, and you bounce around, screaming as broken bones and torn muscles are prodded in different directions.

> You can barely see the world outside, but in your moments before passing out, you swear you see Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Luna, and even Celestia swooping below and pushing the bubble back up.

> Rainbow: “Hang in there, lover boy!”

> Fluttershy: “Don’t be falling asleep on me again!”

> These two pegasi got your backs every time, and now royalty? What a bro squad!

“Mmmrmmghrl…”

> And that’s all you had for an opinion.

-----

> It was a stormy day that day at Anon’s hometown, a small but modest sized city.

> The lightning was striking viciously, and people were huddling under anything they could grab or find, surprised at the sudden torrent.

> At the local hospital, the typical chaos was happening, as “the usual patient” was failing; while the doctors were frantically doing their best to make sure he stayed alive, some secretly couldn’t wait until tomorrow, the designated day the patient’s mother asked to come, along with some immediate family to console her.

> This time, however, his lungs are in serious disarray; they don’t even know the cause, considering he was physically healthy at one point, despite being obliterated from that horrible accident.

> The patient coughing something furious, blood begins to spray out of his mouth.

> Getting the usual utensils to seal the erratic perforation in your lung, they bare the person’s chest, which has more scars and stitches wrapped in blood than a Vietnam War veteran.

> “Alright, we need to do this nice and quick, even if…”

> “Nurse… grab…”

> “…”

-----

> Your head is throbbing like it was smacked with a heavy brick.

> Didn’t Nona hit you with a brick? No, that was a dream… Nona has a fetish for red bricks apparently.

> You hoist yourself up, and immediately wish you hadn’t- or perhaps, you wish you could.

> You’re already in a sitting position, and with a killer crick in your neck, you soon realize you’re in a somewhat tight wheelchair.

> In a tent.

> Now, before you let loose some sort of manic panic, you try to reassess the situation: you certainly have woken up in more awkward places and positions.

> Thankfully, it appears that you’re alone in here, and the decent sized pergola is entirely empty with the exception being you.

> It’s a nice pink fabric, but it certainly not any material to withstand rain; it looks like a last minute toss together with cloth and sticks.

> Rarity’s work at her finest.

> You try to move the wheels forward, until you notice two problems; the wheels are locked, and your arms refuse to budge.

> Don’t fool yourself; they’re unbound in any way, but they’re just sitting there. You try your legs, but they don’t seem to work as well; it’s as if pain itself has done a number on your body, and you’re immobilized.

> Oh joy, you’re a supposed hero, in full rainbow armor, and just happen to also be a wheelchair bound quadriplegic.

“Help.”

> There’s a slight stir outside the tent, as if you woke someone napping.

“Heeeeelp.”

> Nothing this time.

“GOD DAMN IT IN THE NAME OF THE THREE GODDESSES I PLEAD THEE TO LIBERATE ME FROM THIS PRISON!”

> A guard burst through the tent, full gold armor, Spartan helmet and all.

> “What’s going on?”

“I can’t feel my penis.”

> “That… sounds like a problem. I’ll get the princess.”

“Can you push me to her? I don’t even care which princess; this hot pink scene is depressing.”

> He eyes the wheelchair’s size, as well as you, before sighing.

> “Not a chance. I’ll send someone who can, and notify the princesses that you’re awake.”

“Thank you; you guys were always a sweetheart.”

> He grunts nonchalantly, and you’re stuck to stew in your own hatred of the color pink.

> Now, you actually like pink, as much as any color, but this tent… this tent is ruining that effect.

> You decide to try something to distract you, and you focus intently with your eyes closed.

> “What you’re feeling is not weird; you want to burrow in my beard!”

> “Gaze upon my chiseled abs- I no longer have the crabs!”

> Pink tents are more bearable with a Fernando hologram.

> You decide to sing with him.

“My rhymes will grab you by the throat, and ride you like a sturdy goat.”

> “I will drown you in my scent, with or without your consent!

“I am whore of some renown; your buttocks are my hunting ground!”

> “I am a manwhore, without peer- absorbing sex from the atmosphere!”

“OOOOOOOOOOH~”

> “AHHHHHHHHHH~”

> Suddenly you hear a guard singing outside, following the vocals perfectly.

> “Woah woah woah woah wowoah woah~”

> “Woah woah wowoah woooaaahhh~!”

“Zooooh~! WHO IS THAT?”

> Another guard comes in as Fernando fades away.

> “Just a nearby sentry guard, sir.”

“I have an important duty for you, soldier. First, you need to tell me where the hell am I.”

> He clears his throat.

> “We’re currently a few hour’s walk west of Canterlot. We had word that Ponyville has been obliterated-“

“Obliterated?!”

> He pauses for a moment, doing his best to not get upset over the word.

> “Yes. We had reports a few days ago about… something that arose from the dragon nesting areas, but the speed it traveled, considering its size, was unheard of. Within minutes, the entire town was destroyed with few survivors.”

> It must have gone for you, thinking you were there; it was actually right, up until…

“How long have I been out this time?”

> “Twilight and the heroic group had brought you before the princesses in critical condition approximately five hours ago. You were so badly damaged that it required 15 unicorns, Twilight, and both the Princesses’ magic to restore you to any decency.”

“Yeah, I’ll have to thank them, but sadly I can’t even move.”

> “Sir?”

“I can’t move anything from my shoulders down.”

> The look on his face garnered so much pity that it made you sick just saying those words.

> “I’m… I’m sorry, sir.”

“At ease, and quit calling me sir. Now, my request, first off, requires me to get outside.”

> “I’ll go get someone wh-“

“Nope, and away I go~”

> Like the cheesy impersonator you are, mentally pop the brakes off and move the wheels forward.

> Stuttering something incoherent, the guard moves aside to let you out.

-----

> It appears that you’re in some sort of war camp; an interesting change from the peace and happiness and other crazy funk you’re used to.

> There’s only a few tents, but there was, almost guaranteed, at least a couple thousand soldiers under Celestia’s command, working diligently to get prepared.

> You spot Celestia and Luna wayyyy off in the distance, along with the Mane Six, but they’re so far on the other side of the camp, that it would be likely impossible for them to spot you.

> Hopefully, anyways; considering you’re about to do something interesting:

“Alright, soldier, here’s what I need you to do.”

> “What’s that, s-, I mean… Anon?”

“Just follow what I say with that beautiful voice of yours, and you’ll do just fine.”

> “S- I mean, what?!”

> You clear your voice, and with the loving honor of Vinyl, you have two decent sized speakers explode through the grass.

> How they’re powered or hidden there, who fucking knows?

> You start off the song with the sweet sound of your voice, a bit rough from the pain, but inspiring nonetheless with the nectar of symphonic music.

> Soldiers are turning at the sound, captured by the odd music, and you fire the first two lines to their souls:

“Sword by sword, sharpening it til it’s shiny; buff it up more, gotta make it look pretty for your foes-“

> “Gotta keep them on their toes, prove that us soldiers aren’t for show~”

> Nice, you picked the right guard to help you out as a montage song builds with random guards chipping in.

> “Always gotta keep in mind the detail, so the weapon surely won’t fail,”

> “He’s making Luna’s sword~”

-----

> The blacksmith is kicking in with the tune now, and the guards of Ponyville are now in full dance beat with their duties.

> “Chain by chain, making sure my stuff is buff,”

> “Steel plate links, don’t you know iron has rough chinks?”

> “Making something that will protect,”

> “From her tail to her neck-“

> “Gotta make it look fit for royalty,”

> “With the symbol for her subjects’ loyalty-“

> “It’s the Princess’s new suit~!”

> Ok, so they’re making an impromptu parody of Rarity’s song, but hey! That’s fine by you.

“Shields for soldiers are easy, just put em on the sides,”

> “That way the metal will protect their flanks and hides!”

> “Bolt it in nice and tight,”

> The soldier looks at the shield installation.

> “Do you think this look alright?”

> You give a nod, and the guard happily marches away. You continue magicking your wheels as you traverse further down the camp.

“Something’s wrong, why the fuck am I here?”

> “We’re here to fight the demon, who attacked Equestria with fear!”

> “The dark god that destroyed our town,”

> “And now tries to threaten our royal crown!”

> “Gotta prepare for the war,”

> “And even up the score!”

“I’m stuck in a fucking~ wheelchair~.”

-----

> “Hoof by hoof, gauntlets built,”

> “Helmets made, sword and hilt,”

> “Trained for war, in the groove,”

> “So we can try to prove,”

> “The Art of the Warrr~!”

> With a large amount of manly cheers, you’re thankful that they stop at the first chorus, when someone you actually recognize appears.

“Hey, Twilight. Are you the escort I get to fuck in the backroom, I take it?”

> “Anon! Please have some manners!”

“Sorry, I’m not in the best of moods.”

> She makes it to you and tilts her head to the side.

> “Although it seems you cheered up the army a bit, I don’t think anyone is in a good mood.”

“Twilight, take a step forward.”

> Baffled by the harmless request, she does so, now a couple feet away.

“You’re doing a lot better than what I can do…”

> “Why did you ask me that, and why do you look so stiff?”

“I… I can’t move.”

> She gasps at that, trying to find some way to refute this.

> “But, you were just moving your wheelchair, I saw you!”

“With magic, Twilight. I can’t move from the neck down right now.”

> “B-but, we healed you! We had so many; we thought you’d be perfect!”

> You shake your head, disappointed in this response.

“Nothing nor no one is perfect, sweetheart, no matter how much they claim to be. Right now… I’m useless. You might as well stick me with a knife and call it good.”

> You swear you saw Nona shifting between guards some distance ahead after making this request, but you realize that paranoia is getting the better of you; in all respects, however, you really can’t do much right now to stop it, beyond some minor psychic powers.

> “Anon, I… when this is over, we’ll fix you. Don’t ever say that again, you’re not useless, no one is, especially… especially not me…”

> It tears your heart not being able to do a damn thing when Twilight starts crying and rests her head on your lap, quietly sobbing on your armor.

“Twilight, you’re right. Everything will be alright, ok? Just…eh, sigh. C’mere, you.”

> You lift her up to her surprise with magic, and place her around your neck, trying your best to give her an armless hug.

“Sorry I can’t use my arms, but if I could, I would totally be hugging you right now.”

> “Oh, Anon…! I t-told Spike to wait at home, because it w-was… it was too dangerous, and when I found out that P-Ponyville was… he’s…!”

> She tears up even more, and grabs around your neck tightly.

> Your chest decides now was the time to seize up, and you cough out a small amount of blood; you do your best to spit it to the side, staining your armor and the ground. A few guards are watching the sad yet heartwarming sight.

> You press your head against her shoulder, the goggles still on your head pressing against her mane.

“We have a battle to fight, let’s go see the Princess.”

> “A-…Alright. You’re right…”

> You fire up your wheelchair moving magic and stroll around like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Aire to the main headquarters.

-----

> Nona sees you. Oh, he sees you perfectly, easily in view. From miles away, his vision is like a hawk with binoculars, watching as you travel towards the Princesses.

> He crunches his teeth at the sight of Twilight holding on to you, the feeling of love grinding his gears just the wrong way.

> Standing over a cliff, he can see the thunderclouds hovering over in the far distance, the old god at work in making a path of chaos on its venture to here.

> Looking back at the camp, Twilight is now resting on your lap. This sets him off just the wrong way.

> “Despicable mare, such caring about love and friendship, it just makes me sick.”

> A voice answers him, almost chuckling in response.

> “Oh ho ho, this is most interesting, I daresay. Weren’t you the one who wants to kill that sturdy fellow? He’s nothing more than a baby rabbit now, and you the hawk.”

> Discord appears on Fluttershy’s couch, apparently growing fond of its comfy entitlement. He’s noisily drinking what appears to be fruit punch this time.

> He offers some to Nona.

> “Want some?”

> “Bugger off, to both your statements. If I wanted to kill him now, I could do it easily.”

> “And yet here you are, hiding like some bandit and eyeballing him like he’s a celebrity offering signatures. I’m sure if you walked up to him and asked, he would, ignoring his… current condition.”

> “Why the fuck would I want any remnant of his existence in my possession when I want him dead?”

> Discord smiles, picking at his single pointy tooth.

> “Well, whether it’s bridling him for attention or rubbing him off, you appear to be doing neither of those. You do understand that once *it* gets here,”

> He points at the far off smoke in the distance where the unnamed god is leaving a trail of havoc.

> “Both you, I, and any other antagonist or hero that may randomly appear will be no match for it, correct? Once that guy takes him on… your chance is gone.”

> Nona, already pissed with obvious information pointed out to him, pulls out a card table and a decent looking arm chair to place across from Discord, and slams on the table a pack of cards. Discord raises an eyebrow at this response, grinning at what his somewhat rival is trying to say.

> “Know how to play Polish Euchre?”

> The king of chaos, in title only, sits up and claps his hands together.

> “But, of course! Anything Anon knows, we know as well, right?”

> Pondering on this, Nona is silently making a bet as to how you will turn out against the decaying wound you have left unchecked all this time, as it has turned far more powerful than anybody could have imagined.

> However… you have pulled off some ridiculous things; even you beat the gnome he couldn’t even touch.

> He refuses to touch you like this, in such a pathetic state; he’d rather you suffer in agony than to defeat you in such an overwhelming battle.

> Nona spits at the ground, the saliva acidic enough to burn through the grass.

> “Sometimes I fucking wonder about this batshit crazy world. I’ll deal.”

-----

> You’re now at some fancy table with a big ol’ map chilling on it, faded with time.

> Sitting in your mobile throne in whatever glory you have left, you’re surrounded by the Mane Six, who have donned some interesting looking mail armor with the exception of Fluttershy and Rainbow, who logically have lighter leather on them.

> Each tinted in their respective color, you’re sure that, next to you, they could easily be mistaken for a fruity version of the Knights of the Round Table.

> Err, Knights of the Rectangle Table, you apologize for the confusion.

> Along with the aforementioned, Princess Luna and Celestia stand opposite of you, adorned with some very fancy and professional looking protective covering.

“Damn, who’s dick must I suck to get armor as nice as that, Celestia?”

> She cringes at your vulgar comment; she probably knows of your “condition” thanks to your mention to the guard, but for the meantime she’s playing dumb in responding at your joke.

> “I can only assume that you’d have to sprout wings and a horn to get something this nice, silly Anon.”

> You thank yourself for asking Twilight to put your hands on the handlebars, so you look like Xavier; ignoring, of course, the fact you’re wearing a full armor set of several colors, tramp stamped with #24’s old logo.

“Welp, I got the wings down, and although I can perform some sort of magic, I don’t think Rainbow Dash will continue to date me if I have a horn protruding from my forehead.”

> Rainbow Dash chuckles at this, looking at you endearingly.

> “Maybe! But I’m glad to see that you’re back to your old self.”

> Both you, Twilight, Princess Celestia AND Luna flinches at this; it appears that there are a total of five people who know your dirty little secret, the guard included.

“Damn right I am. That gnome shook me up so badly, but I think I got my head on straight now.”

> That’s about all you have on straight.

> Celestia clears her throat nervously, and begins pointing at parts of the map.

> “This, is Canterlot, where we first embarked.”

> She points at the top right of the map.

> “From there, we traveled a good ways south west, to here.”

> She points at the expected area, where a big black X is marked on the map.

> “Now, the target in question was originally… here, above two hours west of our location. It emerged supposedly into the dragon’s hatching grounds and main kingdom. From there, it steadily traveled southeast to here…”

> She travels her hooves in an arc, her face grimacing as she points over Ponyville on the map.

> “It is now directly south of us by about three hours, and after spending a fair time… doing damage to the town, it has proceeded towards our direction as expected. ETA is expected to be about two hours.”

“Why here, why not Canterlot? I could only expect that the castle is far better in guard-“

> You begin coughing feverishly again, leaning forward without a will to do so, and you find your forehead resting on the map as you curse the world and spit out phlegm.

> Unable to move, Twilight magically takes a handkerchief, presses against your mouth, and uses it to lift you back into position, all the meanwhile pretending to wipe your mouth.

> Rainbow Dash looks at Twilight irately.

> “He can do that himself, you know.”

> Twilight, flustered at the comment, resorts to feigning ignorance. You humbly thank her in silence.

> “I’m sorry.”

> The two Princesses look at each other before looking at you; assuming you can feel you feel your face right, you look like a well-equipped hero that is death where he sits.

> Your eyes half open, trying to make sense of the situation, and seemingly unable to move anything but your mouth, you’re probably the sorriest sight the knowing has ever seen.

> Rainbow Dash, having noticed your mannerisms are a bit lacking, looks at the wheelchair and gives a very sound guess.

> “Anon… can you move?”

> Your jaw clenches at the posed question, fear taking you in more a paralysis than any injury could.

> But before you can answer, Celestia does for you.

> “Of course he can move, look at him!”

> Twilight and Luna both bewildered, they all stare at you intently.

> And you raise your left arm to sluggishly wave it, before plopping it back on the armrest.

> You feel like the biggest trolling douchebag in the world, but it was nothing compared to watching Celestia’s magic turn you into a puppet, just to fool these mares.

> Rainbow is still skeptical at the evidence before her, and she objects to it.

> “If you can move, Anon, why don’t you stand up?”

> You give her the most sorrowful look your eyes can pull, emptiness filling your once vibrant and cheerful deposition.

> Like a lethargic cat not giving the slightest of fucks, you look down as Celestia brings you to your legs, posing you in an admirable manner.

> You’re about ready to cry; Twilight takes a glance at Celestia with a smile, sees what’s happening, and looks away in disgust.

> This show won’t last forever, and it’s best to have them know now as to just how bad things are.

“Tia, please, stop.”

> The group, Twilight excluded, is dumbfounded at your random remark.

> She refuses to do so, and your limp arm reaches up to scratch your chin.

“… STOP IT!”

> Your mind cancels out the magic, and your knees buckle as you crash into your armor on the table, shredding the map.

> The group gasps at the sight as you begin blubbering like a five year old boy who dropped his ice cream, your hoarse throat making raspy sobs.

> You can’t help it; if there was a list of “things that you can understandably cry to”, you think that becoming a quadriplegic would be one of them.

> Dashie jumps on the table, nudging your immobile head as you lay there unable to move your sprawled arms and legs.

> “Anon, you…”

“I… I can’t move. I thought I could do it, that everything is fine, but… it’s no use. I’m just a giant metal paperweight or door stopper right now.”

> Before you could wallow in self-pity, Rainbow Dash bends down and gives you a soft kiss.

> “No, you’re not… you’re the love of my life, and everyone’s friend here. You’ve had people fight for you, die for you…”

> She runs a cyan hoof to wipe off your tears, and with a look of determination, begins to try picking you up.

> Twilight: “Rainbow, just let me use my m-“

> “NO! He’s MY special some*pony, and I CAN TAKE CARE OF HIM.”

> Twilight shuts up at the scathing remark, and everyone struggles to watch as Dash lifts you into the air, and with a huge amount of difficulty, manages to get you back into the wheelchair before collapsing on your lap in exhaustion.

“Rainbow…”

> “You’re really heavy in that armor, y’know? But I don’t care if I had to do every day; you’ve carried me more than enough times, and I think it’s my turn to do it.”

> You can’t help but smile at the daring courage in her words. The other ponies smile as well, the sight of two lovers caring for each other such a heartfelt sight.

“I love you, Rainbow Dash.”

> “I love y-you too, Anon.”

> It’s weird to hear her stuttering, but you find it cute, nonetheless.

> After a moment of carefree silence, everyone realizes that they’re in the planning stage of a war that they’ll all likely die in, and Celestia keeps the upbeat attitude as she explains the situation.

> “Like I said, the ‘thing’ is going to face us in a few hours. In about an hour, we’ll take our positions in front of the camp. Soldiers will take the front with their customized shields and swords to hold it at bay. Pegasi have detachable spears on them, and they’ll be able to ram the enemy and take off. Most importantly, you six, Luna and I, and the unicorns will be launching a magic offense from the rear. Following behind us is a special artillery team that we’ve just designed-“

> By design, it appears she means “just made up”; you saw the style of the trebuchets, and they are just simply crude and pathetic. Celestia continues about random strategies about the frontlines and whatnot, when you realized she left one crucial detail out.

“Where will I be?”

> She, as well as every single pony within earshot, looks at you with looks of grieving. You huff at the response.

“Great PlayStation 3, I’m not dead yet. I already see two uses for me.”

> Princess Celestia, ignoring Luna’s quiet and somber rejections, politely addresses you.

> “Please, we’re all ears.”

“First off, I’d like to point out that this thing is looking for me; if you wanted to, and I wouldn’t hold it against you, you could send me off to the Arctic Circle or whatever the hell is the Equestrian equivalent, and let me slowly die off as the creature ignores you entirely.”

> You thought it was a brilliant, logical, and noble plan, but it appears all it did was piss every*pony the fuck off.

> Fluttershy: “We can’t send our friend off to die, we need you!”

> Applejack: “That plan stinks as much as a week old barrel of apples sitting in the sun!”

> Twilight: “Why would you even think of that!”

> Rarity: “That would be simply-“

> Rainbow Dash: “I would NEVER let that happen.”

> Pinkie Pie: “Oatmeal? Are you CRAZY?!”

> Luna: “You’re out of your mother fucking mind, I would send you to the moon before that happens!”

> Now that last one was an ingenious idea! Unless that cursed thing is able to go airborne, it would just be frantically destroying the world as you slowly die- oh, huh. I guess every idea is just as absurd as the next one.

> Celestia clears her throat once more and every*pony goes silent.

> “That’s noble and all, but there’s two snags with that plan. The first one is obvious; we won’t abandon you, and if you die, well… you know what happens to us.”

> It appears only half the group understands this, and you nod anyways.

> “The second one is also obvious; this thing is a threat to Equestria. No matter the circumstances it must be stopped and defeated, to avenge Ponyville. For Equestria!”

> A soldier hears this, and shouts in unison.

> “For EQUESTRIA!”

> Soon the entire camp is repeating Celestia’s words, and she smiles encouragingly at the result of her partial speech.

> “In any case, what is your second proposal, Anon?”

“I figured that while I can’t do much physically, I can supply… background aid.”

> You’re met with blank stares of befuddlement until you have a large scimitar appear out of nowhere, and have it stab into the table.

> They all jump back as you chuckle, Dashie bumping into your chest plate. Your gruff laughter soon cuts into a hacking wheeze, however, and after a moment, you continue in all seriousness.

“I can still pull out small things, it seems, and I can also…”

> You psychically pull the sword back out, make it give a few sluggish swings, and let it drop back at the table.

> Rarity: “That’s just simply brutal, Anon! I simply-“

> Celestia: “Very well, Anon, I’ll accept your request to join us, but on one condition only.”

> You give her a look that suggests that she isn’t in the true position of power to call the shots like that.

> Or maybe she is, considering just how doleful you are right now. You don’t even care anymore; you have the best pegasus in the world on your lap, and you’re in some badass suit of armor like Siegfried from Soul Calibur.

“Alright, name it.”

> “You will be next to us, behind us specifically. If you’re lost, all is lost, and I can’t afford to lose you.”

> If you could shrug, now is when you’d do it, but you settle with a nonchalant nod.

“Anything I can do to help.”

-----

> The conference of sorts finishes with final talks of preparation, and you magically begin to wheel yourself away, only to find Rainbow pushing you whilst midair.

“I can push myself, y’know…”

> “Shaddup, and let me be a good g-g-girlfriend…”

“What was that?”

> “You called the, err… people you love in your world ‘girlfriend’, right? I’m your g-girlfriend, so let me do this.”

> You sigh, shaking your head.

“Your funeral, missie.”

> “Technically, wouldn’t it be yours?”

> BAM!

> Shejustdidadarkjoke.jpg

> She chokes on herself having said that, unsure if she should commit Sudoku or apologize a thousand times.

> You burst out laughing at the fact she said it, irony and humor twisting at you like a cold knife.

> Seriously though, it’s nice to finally laugh at this dire situation.

> “Was it bad I said that, Anon? I feel terrible.”

“Not at all, it helps make me feel better. We have an hour to “be prepared” for the battle, can you take me to my tent?”

> “Sure, Anon, but why…? It’s deserted in there.”

“I want to see if the Captain still works; I didn’t create this armor with a detachable loin plate for nothing.”

-----

> Thirty loud minutes and twenty unwritten pages later, you learned that the Captain is indeed operational, and despite making Dashie do all the hard work, the both of you come out of the tent in your own victories.

> It appears the sentries nearby heard every last noise, and are pinker than a medium-rare steak.

> Rainbow Dash dares at them to respond as she carts you out.

> “I was just taking care of some ‘battle wounds’!”

> One of them snorts; she was screaming louder than a cat sprayed down with catnip and had an electric induced salt lick nearby.

> You jut your chin out like a boss, and boldly proclaim your stance of the past half hour.

“Yeah, we just fucked like rabbits right before the final fight, what are you gonna do about it?”

> This earns a cheer, and Rainbow blushes as the entire region erupts in the hoof-based applause.

> “That was great, Anon!”

> Your eyes pop out to see that Twilight was camping out behind your tent and eavesdropping the entire time.

> Dashie: “Twilight?!”

> Soon following her, another pony appears behind the tent. This one was more expected; old habits die hard.

> “And Fluttershy?!?”

> Twilight: “Hey, we all have our needs, hehe!”

“Well, damn, I didn’t think we caught that much attraction!”

> You were ABOUT to look away when you spot two Alicorns sneakily shuffling out the other way, their characteristic dark and colorful manes a dead giveaway.

> There’s hollering and hooting at this when you realize what was going on.

“Nuh uh, NUH UH!”

> Twilight: “Heehee, like I said!”

> Fluttershy: “Sorry! *Sqwee*”

> You turn your head at Rainbow, who’s just as embarrassed as you are, when you shout your lack of care to the world.

“And not a single fuck was given this day!”

> A guard, hiding from view, heckles you back.

> “Sounded like about five were given in the past hour, with how loud she was screaming!”

> Howling and wolf whistling ensues as you give the heartiest laugh you had left in you; these guys are great.

“Alright, Rainbow, let’s get out of her before they ask us for an encore.”

> She hurriedly pushes you away when another voice calls out, a female this time.

> “Are ya going to the other side of the camp? I’m sure they could hear you over there, too!”

> “WHO SAID THAT?! I SWEAR I WILL END YOU!”

> Hollering and hilarity ensues the entire camp as Rainbow Dash is shooting daggers at the nearest soldier.

> Celestia appears like she was oblivious to the whole thing, wings outstretched and everything.

> “Soldiers of Equestria, please! We need to get ready for the battle at hand! Make your final preparations and meet with your squadrons at the battleground!”

> There was a loud response of “Yes, your majesty!” before they swiftly returned to their last minutes of work, and the Princess lowers her mouth to your and Dashie’s ears.

> “That was one heck of a morale booster for the troops, but next time try to be more… discreet about it, if you could.”

> You snort at that.

“Sounds like you were enjoying yourself as much as we were, Princess.”

> She gives her flawless troll grin and shrugs at the comment, before walking off like Hulk Hogan in a blender commercial.

“C’mon, Dashie, lets chat a bit before things go to hell.”

> “As if they’re not already.”

-----

> Within the hour, the somewhat massive pony army has been quite tactfully put into position.

> You’re in a quietly foul mood, considering the situation at hand- both the world’s and your own.

> Still, awkward paralyzed sex does relieve a bit of morose feeling.

> With the noisy chatter of soldiers giving pep talk and orders, you sit there quietly on the shabby platform the Mane Six, the Princesses, and yourself rest on.

> The mares are talking about silly topics, trying to pretend that nothing is about to happen.

> Princess Luna and Celestia are just as quiet as you are, as they watch the writhing mass in the far off distance get larger and larger.

“Princesses.”

> They snap from their stare, looking at you in wonder.

> Tia: “Yes, Anon?”

> Luna: “What is it?”

> Perhaps it’s your pessimism talking, but your heart is in the lowest hole it can build.

“I don’t want to do this. Everyone is going to die, and then I am going to die. There has been enough suffering in the world, can’t I just go forward and end it now, and save the troub-“

> “Shut up.”

> It was to your shock at it was Luna that said this, looking back at the ominous sight.

> You see tears building from the past few minutes on her eyes, and you realize just how terrified she is.

> “You might think that just because you’re ready to die, everyone here is, but they’re NOT! This is their land, which they’ve lived and suffered for! They fought hard for it, and we’ll never surrender or give up our way of life!”

> Celestia puts a wing around her little sister, placing Luna next to her.

> “There, there…”

> “Tia… it’s just like before… I’m scared…!”

> “Don’t worry… you’ll be fine as long as your big sister is here.”

> Luna looks at Celestia with watery eyes, and presses her face against her big sister’s chest.

> “Tia! *sob*”

> The soldiers hear the crying sobs, and the Mane Six had stopped their chatting long ago.

> Celestia, who has had her face solemn the entire time, looks at the soldiers watching.

> “Knights of Equestria! I know you may feel like my sister, and some of you may be scared! It is ok to leave now, if you wish; I will not be upset.”

> Not a single one moved. Only one guard had something to say, his voice barely trailing over the army.

> “Never surrender! For Princess Celestia!”

> The whole army shouts its approval.

> “AWOO!”

> Another chips in.

> “For Princess Luna!”

> “AWOO!”

> “For the Hero of Equestria, Anon!”’

> “AWOO!”

“Geez, you guys are embarrassing me…”

> “For EQUESTRIA!”

> “AWOO! AWOO! AWOO! AWOO!”

> They chant the Spartan cry like they were about to try taking down a proclaimed god.

> Oh wait, they are.

> Celestia raises a hoof, and they hush immediately.

> “You all are the finest this world has to ask for. You are strong, dedicated, loving; you come with hearts of joy to face a terror none of us has ever seen before. However, this does not matter- what DOES matter is that it is a threat, and we must stop it. We WILL stop it!”

> “AWOO! AWOO! AWOO!”

> “Return to your positions, at ease!”

> They all cheer for their loved ruler as they go back to what they were doing, and Celestia turns to you with that cocky royal face she so lovingly has.

> “Anon, if you try to upset my sister again, I will kill you myself. I don’t even care what that will result in- I WILL do it.”

> Luna: “Big sis!”

“She’s right… this is your kingdom, your home. If I were in your shoes, I would have been the guy in the front, leading the charge.”

> Celestia grins at this.

> “I would do that, but then Luna would want to be next to me, and then the soldiers would argue and try to surround us… their extreme loyalty can be quite a double edge sword.”

> You nod, as it is again the single thing you can do.

> Silence builds as the final hour at hand, the titanic terror slowly grinding forward.

> It’s within a fifteen, maybe ten miles of you, and you can see the fear gathering in the troops.

> Hell, every of the mares next to you are shivering to a degree, you included.

> However, you fill your lungs with air, and unleash the first rendition of the Equestria Anthem.

“O Equestria, how thy country’s sun rises bright,”

“Thou moon casted into fine nights,”

“With Harmony set thy beauty, and Love be your frame,”

“Cast praise to foes, and let them know, that we shalt not be shamed!”

> It appears everyone knows the lines as much as you do, despite you making it up as you go.

“By sky we rule, and thy lands we plow,”

“The seeds of youth, the next generation comes!”

“To preserve thy stature, our moon and sun,”

“To victory we stand, with war we pound the drums!”

> Booming noises occurs when Pinkie Pie now somehow has the musical set she used to take care of the parasprites. A bit tacky, but it works.

“O Equestria, O Equestria, can you hear our cries?”

“They shout in thy name, thy title of highest order;”

“Through song and praise, our kingdom’s flag shall fly,”

“Through triumph we hail from border to border!”

> By now the colossus is on your doorstep, and by colossal you mean the one biggest thing you’re sure you, these ponies, and any sentient being has seen in any reality, fantasy, or void existence.

> You cannot even begin to describe to size of it, but it would be a wasted effort if you let the poor minds trying to comprehend the size of this horrid entity.

> With tentacles that dwarfed mountains, and eyes that could very well singularly match the size of the defending army, you can feel the tension of terror quickly stirring in the troops.

> Well, it looks like they just realized they were going to die- good for them!

> Celestia: “Hold your positions, soldiers!”

> Easier said than done, you could see them quaking in their chainmail as the fields far away instantly materialize into sand under the thousands upon thousands of flailing tentacles.

> You feel the dismay of cold sweat pour down your face, unable to wipe it away as it passes.

> This thing is quite easily several dozen miles wide, now that you have a closer perspective; not that this helps manners with accessing how the fight will turn out.

> About a mile away, it takes you a moment for you and everyone else to realize that it actually had stopped.

> There’s a wave of nausea and quaking fear building between the unmoving force and the suddenly tiny army; the sheer size it made the group feel like it was but working ants.

> So, uh, what happens now?

> It appears that the celestial demon wishes to convey it’s acknowledgement to the army, as if it finally noticed them.

> Speaking in a dozen menacing voices, your head explodes with each syllable, along with every*pony else within earshot.

-----

> “P͎̦̬ͭͨ̑̆̏ͬ̉ͅa̝͍̠̣ͭ̈́̓̈́̕ͅͅt̬͉͇͚̯̆ͯ̒̃̏͂̏h̡ͪ̌̿̎̅̈e͓̰͙͇̘͌ͫ̐̇́͌ͅͅt̩̘͟i̜̲̘̱͔͉̗͝c͠ f̧͉͉̦̤̠̠̄̽̑̽̑̇̑i̞̝̖͍͈͖̭͐g͍͚̦̤̈̃ͯ̌̀ͬm̧̯͋ȇ̗̲̮̟͛͛n̢͉̣͙͖̊̓̾ͭt̩̥͛̊̓͊̍͆s̳͈̦̹̲̫̐ͭ,̞̒̐͒̍ͪ́ ̢̹̖̜̪̜̪͇̀̑ͫ̏ͣͩt̹̱̫̽ͮh͎͈͂̎ͮ̀ͨ̂͘r̙͚̭̂̓̿ͦǫ͙̱̺̘̟ͨ͐̽̀ǘ̲̰̙͉̤̟ͦ̊̈́ͬ͑͜g̱̫̱͜h͉̫̜̅̽̄͢ ̻͇̘ͣ͛͂ͅm̸̩̖̞͔̲̥̄ͪͮ͗̉͑ȳ̌̾̌̉̽͟ ̋ͨͫ͊̓̚͏̞d̘̃̿́̈́̾e͉̤̪̱͉̝̔̓s͙̳̹̣͈̗ͭ̃ͦ͒͊̿̓i̥̯͙̟̜̔̓ͮ͋̃̂͟r͈̭ͬ̐̆ͤ́͗̓e͊̅̄͋̐͢ ̫̱͉͕̮̭̯͊ͯͩ̉y̨̟̝̬ͪ̒ͮͪ̍̆o͎̯͖͌̌̐ͩ̊ͨ͟u͍̩̘̰̻̹͠ͅ ͇̹͙̥ͪͦb̤̣̯̠̣͔ͥ̾͌͊͠ͅr̳ͤͧͣͧ͑̂ͯ̕o̦͙̟͉̪̲ͯͬŭ̅̓̌҉̗̬̼̱͔̻͇g̻̿̆̉h̯̫̫̙ͮt̗̣̾̅̿ͪ̓ ͨ̍҉̘̮͎f͗͗ȏ̓ͯ͐̍r̝͆ͦͣ͡t̮̥̱͋͗̇ͅḣ͓͖͕̣̭̲̒̃́͌͂ͦ͢ y͎̳̹̗̏ͩͣ͛̐̇ͅo̵̳͙̗̥͇̮̘ͨ͗ͪͧ̓̽u̩̮̱͖̱̻̘r̼͓̃̑̌́̋̽̀͡s̟̖ͣ͊ͨ̋̒́̓͜e͜l͇̺̣͚̯̹̙͋͜v̨̻̖̤̬̏ͩȅ̩͍̒̆͛s̎́ͬ͘ ̯̠͚͓͖a͍͚͎̅̌ͧs̷͔̩͛ͮ̄ ̜̿͌ͥ̃̈́͠s̈̾҉̫̙̪̲̯a̢̯ͦc̣̝͉̼̰̲͎ͯͤ̆r̥̣̺ͥ̒i̯̙̞͚ͣ͋̀f̘͖̬̱̥́͊ͯ̕ͅi̠̟̦̼c̈́͒͛̈́͂́e͖͖ͤs̷̞̰̪̘ͭ̋̿̄͒ͩ ͔͛ͨͤͭ̓ͭ͌͘f̘̝̠̙̙̖̹͐ͤ͊ͦ͌ö̺̩̟͇́r̳̥̬̼̬͡ͅ ̢̯̰̟ͨ̔̾ͩ̓̑t̪͍̱̝ḥ̢͓͗ͤͪ̿̍ͫ̂e̜ͨ ̻͕̝̫̩̘̐ͩ̇͌̊͛͐g͍͕͐r̨͓͕̫̣̲͇ea̖̙̒̅t̨̗̼ͬ͛ͥ ͈̠̮͙̖̜͇ͭ̆b̬̂ͩ̈ͮe͓̤͟i̖̖n͔͊ͤg̫͂ͪͬ͒͐̿͂͘ ̴̫̣̓ő̜͖͍̫̞̩f̄ͥ̏̍ ̼̩̪̝̻̺̖f̶͎̰̮̬̦̥̩̈́ͮͤȩ͍̫̣̖͇̮̬͛̈͛a̜̭̯̕r͇̣.̴͔̮̙͓̑ͫͦ̊͛͂̚ͅ”

-----

> Celestia: “We are NOT your pawns to toy with, oh ‘great being’. We are here to stop your unworthy crusade of lands you’re not welcomed in.”

> Like steel wool scraped against a matte iron sheet, the laughter that builds in the dark entity’s nonexistent throat is bellowed, your ears unable to hear anything but the wretched noise.

-----

> I̴ͮͫ ̴̤̭ĥ̨͍̩̦͕̖̜̈́̑̔͆̐o͉͙̮̜̬l̯̳̝̜̼̉̍̂d͎̞͎̥͚̝̭͠ ̷͉̹̮̖ͅl̯̃͆̓̕ị̦̗̘̞̠̺t̥̩̿͒̽t̡̬̘̖̆͌́̚l̖̹̺̳̫̳̰̔͒e̢̗̤̩̲̥̼̣̋͂ ̧̫̻͋ͭͩ̎̌ͯĭ̝̬̝ͮͨ̾̋n͇̻̗̥͈t̵͈̟̠͉̙̖e̟̜̞̙̗̰̠͗̊̏̓̿ͬ̄r͕̩͔̫̱̥̓̊̅͑ĕ̞̙̟̔͊s̴̫͔͙͖̥̀̅́̐̈́̑ͅt̩̩͔̦̻̓ͫͧͧͦ ̓҉̬͕͓͙̩ḯ̡ͫn̄̔ͬ̆̊͏ ͔̖ͪͯ̀̋̄i͔̥͉̳͛̂̓ͤͦ̊̂͡n̤̙͑͗ͯ̎͢s̬͇̠ͬ̃̓͂e̻̝̭̱͙͒̇̆͗̂͗c̖̋̿̈́t̬ͪ͐ͬͦ̓̈ͧ͢s̑;̱̪̜̟̐͌͑ ̐ͦ̍̀̃͛̒m̴͙͉ͪͭỹ̦̘̻̺͍̓̇̾̎̚̚ ̧̭͖̃̏̅̎͐̈p̖͔̯̭̙̯̲̿ͤ̎ͯ̚͟ṛͩ̌͞e͈̋̍ͤ̒ͥ̎̑͢ͅs̜͕̳̠̆͊ͪë̷́͗̓͗̊ͩ̏n͕̲̎͆̉̒̚ċ̘͓̤͜e̎҉̭ ̤̹͛ͪ̑͑̎ͪ͂a̻͍̯̱ͮ͂̊͑ͅl͙̣̳̪̖ͭͧ̍o̦͙͝n͓͖̩̟̄͂̐ͅe͖͖͑ͬ́͡ ̣̪͉̯ͣ̄̉̈̋̔̚ͅmͧͫ̽ạ̖̣̓̀͑ͯk̫̖͓̭ͪ̌̉̂͗e̲̫̻͈͕͐̈̽̑̐ͩ̕s̸̩͖̥̲̱̜̎ ͖͍̹̲̏ͣͯͯ̆t͔̪͗̔̎͑͗h͈̥̖̅̅͑͛e̠͕̥̖͉m̼̹̙͎̳̉ͣ̎ͯ̕ ̭͎͚̈̒c̘̖͇͘o̩ͯ͜ẇ̜̱̼̙͍͂͗̌e̦͌͌̌̆ͯ͛͊r͎͖͕͍̯̿̓̎ͪ͗͘ ͚͈͙̦̻͊͛͐̉ͣ̚i̢̱̹̜n̲͗̅͛ͯ͐͑̆ͅ ̟̋͛̆͢f͙̾ͥ̇ě̔͒̊ͣ̓͆͝a̡ͪ̑ͧͥ͑̽̉r͓͎̪̅͊ͥ.͛͒̍̈̐҉̘̬

-----

> Luna: “You may think we hold nothing to you, but your size alone will never conquer our doubts.”

> You’d hate to break this to Luna, but you think it already did that. Half of these blood craving “soldiers” are ready to shit themselves. You yourself might have tinkled a little with that last laugh.

> No one will ever know.

-----

>“Ḯ̼̙̦̥̎̈́ͤͩ ̣̋̔ͬ̑ͣͮo̶͔̹̻̼͖̬͛͑͗̿n̷̞̻͎̦ͨ̋̄ͫ̑ͅl̮̩̥͓̙ͩͧ͒ͪ̉ỷ̸̬ͮ ̛̻͗ͪͩd̻̥̯͂̽̔̌ͣ̃ͥ͘e̡͉m̬̹̦̻̹̜̞̾̾̎̌̋å̜͓̉͡n̎̇ͤ̈́ḋ̓͐̿́ͅ ̵̫̹ͮͧ̎ǫ͇̖͍̿͊̾͐n̠͈͊͗e̴͍͓ͮ̾͒̉̽ ̥̲t̖̖̥̪̣̳͒ͫ́h̛͐iͫ͘n̛͂̓̃̿̇̇͗g̶̹̪͎̰ͤ̒ͬ͌͒,͖̙͖̙͇͑̃̄͜ ̢̟̬̟̩͊̅ͯf̡͓̲̟̝̘ͪͭo̼r̢͔̉ ͖͈͍̜̲ͫ̓͝n̜o̧̲ͪ͒͆̊ͭñ̿ͬͅé̟͚̱̽ͫ̃́̇̅ ̛̮̥̗̬͉̻̓͐o̳̳͉͙ͅf̜͋ ͫ͗ͩ̔ͯt̗̟͖ͤͭ̓́h̪̘̪̔̎ẻ͙̯̰̬̤̭ͫ̊ͩͅș̸̲͎̘̖͙̬̓̑̈́ͣ̐e̪̺̭̻̮̲̓̔ͫ ͚͓̫̱̹͌i̻̞͟n̨̺͎̫̞̘͇͕̑̓ͬ͑s̖̙̻͙̘̟̍̽̿̌i̢̝͔͈̿̊ͧ͒͂ͭg͙ͧͪ͗͒̏̓n͎̮̬̯͆̀͆̎ͮ̓͗ḯ̢̱̤f̴̖̫̓ͯi̿ͩ̍ͥͭc͔̺͈̼̝̹͇a̛͉̹n̵̖͇̹̫̆̑̃t̙͇͖̼̠̭ͯ́ͧ͂ ̟̣̙̫̰̱͎̈ͪͦ̇ͧͯ͞m̙͎̰̆̍̔́̐o͚̼̱̲͔̻͂ͭr̜͇̎t̥̹̮̯̙͔ͪ̍͗̅̋̇ǎ͈̝͎̟ͤ͌̔l̰̙̖̤ͨͨ̍̊̓s̍̔̈̆ ͨ͛́ͫ͂mͬe͕̮̗͈̟̺̖͛̓̉ͮͮͩ̚a̡̲̹̩͇̤̫̘ͧͪn̘͓̠͙͇͍̖̋̿ ͙͎͐̈͊͢à͖̫̲͚̖͔͕̉ͦnͫ͊ͬẏ͓̞̱̥̳ͤ̏t̿ͪ̈́̊̚h͎̳̃̀ͪ͌̋̆̈́i̱̓̋ͤ̈́͐̅ͧn̮̙̙̯̭̫ͯg̭͓̮̦͔̗ͥ̄͂̌̐ͤ ̅̾ͦ͆̔͏̞͓̝̘̜t͙̲̍̉̚ọ̃ͬ̑͛ͧ͗ ͑̈́ͭ̊ͤ͋҉m̙̯̘̋̓͐͛͜e̪̝̓͗.̵̳̱̦͚ͨͭ̒̅͑ͣ ̋͋̈̈̀̈͏G͓͉̪͕i̤͖̤̲ͧ́͑́͑ͤͪṽ̺̠̫̾ͦ͑͑̇͞ẽ͖͝ ̪͌̌̈̄ͭ́m͈̼̟͙̼̞̂̔͒́ͅe̜̟̳͇ͮ͂͋̒.ͅ.̲̙̮͎̦̃̑̂̉ͦ.̹̝͈͓̑̆ ̶̲̻͈̝͍̖̍̈́̑̃͐̏H̙͉̲͌ͫ͛ͭ̀͝I̪̜͉̦ͨ̏M͙̫ͤ̋.̬̍̓͒̚ͅ”

-----

> There were moments of hesitation, as if the armed forces were considering it. Yeah, good luck doing that.

> Celestia: “We will never surrender! To give up one of our own is to give up our country, our essence of being! We represent Equestria, and it SHALT NOT FALTER!”

> “AWOO!”

> That laugh again, as ponies kneels in agony; even Celestia winces.

> If the god of fear, if that’s what you wish to call it, had a mouth, it surely would be smiling in earnest at the pitiable display of defense against it.

-----

t͚͔̤̼̹̺͋̈́ͫ̇̊ͭo͛́ͬ̾͆ ̹̙͞o̰̙̼̦͓ͧ͆ͣ̃b̸̓͐̏͗̊͑l̷̻̓̀̂̒͋ͩ̈́i̤ͥ͊ͧ̑̅̚̚v̙̠͖̈́͑̆̉̒̚i̛̯̭͗͆̍ͦ̏̍ǫ̬͍͎̦̗̬n̹̂ͩͧͫ̀̀.̭̭̥͊̊̑ͭͅ”

-----

> “ATTACK!”

> With Celestia’s command fresh in mind, the hundred catapults launch forward a screaming hellfire of molten rock- only to fall entirely short of the target by thousands of feet.

> Well, that was embarrassing.

> However, the slings of dozens upon dozens of ballistes fire with an angry passion, whistling through the area and piercing through several appendages.

> It’s not exactly hard to miss something this epically large.

> However, it was the hundred and fifty unicorn’s magical assault that gives you hope that something could be done;

> Colors and flashes launching with a grandeur greater than the Holy Roman Empire itself, the effects of it were both random, and extremely prevailing.

> As you watched with awe as the casts hit the monster, explosions of elements reveal the true authority of magic; ice froze over sever thousands of feet over the tentacles before shattering the limbs.

> Fire spells exploded with the nature of a miniature supernova, piercing into it before erupting into a devouring flame, scorching the tentacle into ashes.

> Several spells broke into smaller ones, turning into magical shotgun shells that perforated the mass into large holes before the innards flood out, collapsing under its own lack of support.

> As pegasi took to heights of the heavens to dodge the onslaught of the mystics, a purple beam just screams like a bottle rocket, piercing through one side of the gigantic deviant, and shreds through the entire horizon of the fearful leviathan, severing spells and limbs alike. Explosions follow the parody of the Death Beam, and you cringe at the screaming of the behemoth’s anger.

> You stare with astonishment at a huffing Twilight, who is proud to finally use such a destructive spell.

> “I… huff… always… wanted to do that spell… huff!”

> Now, as you’re wondering, if Twilight has such untapped potential unleashing forth such a vicious wound, you can imagine what Celestia and Luna are preparing.

> They’ve been charging their magic for quite some time, the aura of light and darkness fusing together in some sort of overpowered attack.

> They shout in warning of the assault they’re about to unleash, their voices simultaneous as they become a force in unison.

> “CLEAR THE SKIES!”

> The pegasi barely have time to relocate themselves from the area of effect, and the two princesses’ horns shine with an breathtaking power.

> The spell burst forth from their horns, spiraling and fusing into a sight this world hasn’t seen in almost a thousand years.

> Arcing into the heavens, tearing into space and time itself with its supremacy, the spell finishes a mile above the appalling being.

> Well, you thought it was humiliating that the artillery missed, but this is- OH SNAP.

-----

> With the consuming ardor of the invocation collapsing on itself, the hole in space that the incantation pierced literally created a dark hole, consuming everything in its path.

> Sand gets sucked in like a valiant vacuum cleaner over a beach, and hundreds of the creature’s limbs are torn to tatters as it is drawn into the absence of mass.

> This appeared to have done the trick, astounding you that the Princesses alone could unleash such a tide turning move.

> That is, until Luna collapses from fatigue.

> “Oooh…”

> Her little sister’s part of the spell ending, Celestia is forced to prematurely close the beam, as the sudden lack of half the spell causes the dark hole to somehow collapse, inadvertently releasing the energy outwards and ravaging the Obscure God.

> Well, it wasn’t as exciting as sucking it out of existence, but it was enough to put the foul thing into check.

----- eͦͩ̇͗a̡̭͕̝̥̘r̪̈́̄͗̌͂͊̅s̺͓͓͙̰̺ͨ̒,̩̖̬͔ͦ̿͌ ̸̲̩͙̹̓͌̓̍͌͗ȩ̦͚̠̳̓ͦ̅̀͆͑ͅv̶̙̰̳̱͔͇͂̀ͅḛ̃͐͛ͮ͐ͥr̯͋͆̎̍͋̀̄y̟͓̼̪̋ͨ͝ ̯̯ͨ͋͑͋ͩ̆͌s̝̼ͪ̆̒̒ͨͤi̡̳̰͙̝͕̐͆̏̍͆n̹̯͘g͉͖̜̲̭̅ͥ̄̒̌͘ͅl͈͈͙̫̱̙̅̃͗̎͑̕ė̜̣̦̳ͣͪ̆̉̿̀ ̬ͪͧ̌m̞͊e͓͖̪̊ͫm̨̩̬̫̦͈̿ͨͣ̀̄͋o̪̱̜̗̾ͥ̈́̇ṛ̸̼̱͔̯̻ͭͦͫ̑̂y̱̻ͨ͆ ͮ̉҉̮̬̗̗ó̢̭̲̯͕̗̇͆̆̾f̠̦̺̜̯ͬͥ͂ͦ̏ ̬̝̏ͨ͒t͋̏͗̈ͤͧ̚͏̞e͈r͙̻̄ͭ̽̿͐͂ͭ́r̯̱̜͜o̷ͩ̈ͦr̰̥̱̉ͭ̾ͅ ̲͉̗̳ͥ̏̐ͦ͞ȑ̛̙̉̆ͪͫͮe͕̻̙̱̝̞ͦ̃ͥ̋ͣ̆̾͜s͈̬͙͙̦͕ĭd̻̱̰͔̰̙ͯ̑͛̈͂ͮ͞ē̠͇̘̦̲̱̫̌̍ͤͦ̊̃s̵̺͙ͭͅ ̻̦̭͕͖̌ͭ̄ͮ̇͊̈́i̫̟̳̟͚̘̓͋͌͆̂n͕͈̈́͆͑ ̻͍̥̦̥̌m̨̭̘͍ͮ̈́̽͐e̵̦͇̘̻̰ͭ̎̂̀͐̆.̼̖̩̮̀̎͗̀͑ͧ̚ ̱̞̱̪̆ͤ̿̕

̷ͤͭͬ̐̉̐

ͧ͊̔̌̍҉͇̫̳͍̖Y̷̥̖̰͚̲̯ͣ̉̃͒Óͣ̾ͭU͚̬̤ͪ̈́ͥ̋̒́ͅͅͅ ̷̗̬͈̫͖͔͆̿̄̋̚Ḁ̩̞͉̝̖͍̽̿̐͢R̰̤̣͖̝̎͐̈̂̈́ͫ̍Ė̫̘͈̙̻̣ͅ ̨͎̳̻̭̳̾N͎̖̬͗̋̾́̇ͮ̊Ö̙́T̨̐ͫͨ̽̆ͫ̈ ͚̟̎̂̅P̷̤̬̩̔R̻̊̋̒̈̃̍̕E̵͓͈̝̜̻̗̞̔P̮̝̳̲̀͒͡Ȃ͍̝̠̦̹̉͗̓͠R̸͌É̫͇͔̜ͦ̿ͧ͂̍ͩD͉̬̲̩̊ͫͫ!͉̝̞̹̥͉̱͠

-----

> Halting its progress to lick its wounds, a particularly hulking tentacle erupts from the dunes.

> From its flesh and stone, a cast of something molded from it, and a scaled hand reached forward to claw at the grit.

> Soon a second claw came forth, and with a dusky beard, the entire half of a behemoth dragon revealed itself, wings and all.

> Your head takes a moment to register who this goliath of corruption is.

“What… happened, to you… Trongadonga?”

-----

> His eyes open in slits, and instead of pupils a dark void stood.

> His once shining green scales are now tainted black, warped in pain and twisted agony. Flesh and other bile tentacles injected into him for complete control, he gives a menacing roar to the world.

> Your eyes cannot comprehend what is going on; when he clashed with that THING to save you, he must have been… no. No!

“NOOOOOO!”

-----

> The great dragon opens his mouth, ebony ooze flowing as his jaw separates, and it slowly inhales to unleash a great plume of flame.

> There were sudden calls from the unicorns.

> “Shields!” “Get those SHIELDS UP!”

> Barriers of a hundred unicorns project between the dominant figure and the army, but one by one each one collapses as the black flame penetrates through like a flaming arrow.

> Each of the Mane Six and the princesses’ eyes widen in alarm, and you too soon realize what is about to happen; once that amaterasu of sorts pierces through, the force shields will act as an oven. Even the Pegasi in the air are trapped in the sphere.

> You and every single pony in here will cook alive to a crisp.

> Your mind serrates in pain at the thought, and you anguish at your lifeless body to move.

> If this is YOUR world, why can’t YOU control this?!

> Celestia, who is tending over her younger sibling, creates her own zone of protection, and just in time; the dark flames smash into it, and within seconds the magical is burning black into the casted spell.

> MOVE, DAMN YOU, MOVE!

> Twilight: “This is it… we lost. Goodbye, friends.”

> They look at each other in tears, hugging one another in their final moments.

> You start coughing viciously as your eyes dilate in the rage of being so useless, and black markings travel from your neck as you yell with a murderous rage that could make Miles Edgeworth rethink his career.

“GGGGGRAAAAAAAAAOOOOOO-OBJECTION!”

-----

> A MASSIVE wall of obsidian, marked with runic blessings of Nayru, Din, and Farore, churns from the ground with a quake that shakes the world.

> The giant elemental shield rose just as Celestia’s magic broke, and the dark flames were deflected, rushing around the army with a bulky amount of leeway, forming into an upside down U shape.

> The heat scorching the grass into ruins, you feel the heat even from so far away; however, it wasn’t even close to fazing you as you fall out of the chair.

> Luna, Twilight, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash: (They’re all pretty quick to notice you falling) “Anon!”

> You finally realized that although you couldn’t move your body; just like Celestia’s show earlier of playing you as a puppet, you too could manipulate your body with “magic”.

> The pain of your aching flesh and bones resisting the weight of your shining armor, your wings flare out in their finest glory, as you defy gravity and take to your feet.

> Rainbow Dash: “You… you can move…!”

> Celestia: “You can move!”

“YYYYAYRRRGH!”

> Pain racking your body like a professional xylophonist, and hacking blood out like you inhaled a dozen tacks, you spit to the side without a care of the world. The eight mares take to your side as you sloppily step forward, the agony with each movement almost unbearable.

“ARGHH… Ughhh…”

> Fluttershy: “Take it easy, Anon… you’re hurt.”

> You give her a deadpan stare that made her squeak before turning to Celestia, who’s supporting you the best she can with Rainbow Dash.

“Aurgh… clear… CLEAR ME A PATH!”

> She looks at you with bewilderment, as if you just asked to perform anal sex with a cactus on her.

> “Are you crazy? Do you seriously intend to fight that thing alone?”

> You fall to a knee, pulling yourself back up with an effort that called for the help of the Goddesses themselves.

“N-no… I have… friends, many friends… they will fight by my side.”

> Applejack: “That’s right! We’ll stick by your side til the end!”

> Rainbow Dash: “We’ll never leave you, not even it means facing the horrors that thing has to offer.”

> Fluttershy: “I will fight for you, even if I hate fighting… if that’s alright.”

> You give a courteous nod, slouching for a moment before standing up straight in a manner of authority.

> Pinkie Pie: “It’s time to show that clown who the real entertainer is!”

> Twilight: “With love and friendship, our powers will pull through victorious!”

> Rarity: “There is no time for this idle chit-chat, we need to-“

> Luna: “It’s TIME TO KICK ASS!”

> Celestia: “CLEAR THE WAY!”

> Little did they know about your last ditch effort, as a wide berth is created to the now sinking wall.

> The dragon, so far away, growls with approval, ready to devour the poor soul that goes near it.

> Without warning, it begins hurdling black secretion out of its mouth, taking forms of horrors you’ve faced in your lifetime;

> Ganon and Sephiroth’s silhouettes take shape, their red pupils bulging from the shadowy birth as they gaze forward.

-----

> ”T̟̪̲̳̱̈ͫͥi҉̫͕̩̖m͙̹̜̜͈̈́̈͂͛͆ẽ͒̽̕ ̡̯̙̬̩͊ͩ̒͐ͅt̝͑̓́͘o͈ ̨̼̃́ͭ̉͐͗̾p͔̞̖̟̥̬ͩ̋̀l̙ͭͮͧa̘͇̋̆̕y̧̝̫͊ͥ ̸̯̻̠ͦw͟ȉ̧̗̘̘̮̤̏̃̃͒ͩẗ̡̩̣̜̝͉̗ͧḩ̀̇̈͗̉...̗͕̹̃͢.̺̮̝̻̺̪̟̅̌̀̈́̀ ̲͍͈̯̬̠̒ͅy͓̲̜̹̻̺o̙̘͕͕ͪ̎ṳ̱̯͍̓͌ͪr̬͈̦͋ͮ̎ͥ͒͐́ ̦̙͍̯ͨ͗̾͌ŏ̩͍̞ͪ͗͑͐ͣͥl̝̞̥͈̒͞d͓̫̺̳͔̱ͦ̓̍̃ͨ̂͋ ̠̲͈̓͊ͩ̒͂ͬͦ́f̭̳̙ͬr̯͇̰̗͙ͫ͋͒̀̈̉͞i̳̥̯̦̦͔̞̅̾̐e̺̪̣͇͞n̷d̈͋s̬̻̔̍͛̒͗̐.̸̞͎̒̔̒.͓̪̼̖̘̑̌.͕̞̺̫̥͋ ̯͍͈́ͫ̒t͉̣̦̘h̘̫̲̭ͅa̼̜t̲̘̫̥ͥͩͫͧ͛̀ ̭͊ͮ̆̍̚ỷ̢̯͕̱̪̫ͬͪo̜̳͔̙̻̥̹ů̟̌̐̑́̎ ͯ̕f̵̣̯̦͙̟͔͖̐͒̊e̪̤͊̍̀ͦ̍̋ͩa̠͕͍͓͂ͦ̓̊̀̐r̿̎ẹ͉̯̭̯̗̀̓̃̈̽͡d̳̤͓ͣ̈̅̐̚ ̛̠̻̪̣͍s̭̱̫̥̻̠ͪ̊̔o̰̠̒ͨ͆ͭ̆̂͐̀ ͔̲̠̎m̳̰̞ͮ͐u̞̩̓ͤ̂̍ͥͤc͒̏͋҉̱̼̘̪h̲̘ͬ̀.͑ͦ͌͐.̪͎͕͉̜̘ͪ̈ͮ̆̑̉.̰̱͖̙͈̦̗̆ͭ͋!̑̈́ͦͮ”

-----

> Two new creations are spewed out, taking hold of memories of vile foes and villains alike; however, with your mind on the brink of demise, you couldn’t care less what shape they took.

> The ponies took a step forward, ready to meet these foes in the throes of doom, only to find that you wouldn’t budge.

> Celestia: “Anon… what is wrong?”

> You lift each of them aside behind you with magic, and you turn your head back to give a hardly modest grin.

“I have an appointment with a few buddies of mine that wish to talk with this fucker.”

> “What?!”

> You make swift hand signals with both your arms, complex motions that took every ounce of concentration to mimic the gestures perfectly.

> Needing blood to finish the ritual, you wipe the bile from your chin and slam both your gauntlets to the ground, as the dirt contorts with glowing hieroglyphs.

“Forbidden Technique: The Clash of a Hundred Anons Summoning JUTSU!”

-----

> As if Nether itself has charted a pathway to several other worlds, a portal carved through the ground to a different dimension as a TRUE army floods out in the glory of battle.

> A hundred different Anons, each from their own reality, land with grace as the Equestrian Army flocks to move out of the way.

> Twilight: “M-More HUMANS!?”

“I figured if I could leave a dent in this bad boy, why not a hundred?”

> “VAKE THAT ONE HUNDRUD ONE!”

> A violent looking pony, vodka attached to his side, waltzes up to you with his fellow Anon.

“Hey, Raikov! Long time, no see!”

> He eyes you suspiciously, taking glances at his friend, before warily responding to you.

> “VE KNOW EACH OTHER?!”

“Not a chance!”

> “V’OH, OKIE THEN! (VIS GUY IS WEIRD ANON)”

> The other Anon with Raikov winks at you before taking their place in the mass of Anons.

-----

> They seriously do not pack light; one of them is in a fucking Sherman tank. How in Nayru’s name did he get that to clear past the Nether Security Clearance?

> There’s another in what appears to be in a makeshift military vehicle; you utterly hope that guy knows how to brake.

> And an F-1 racing car? What in Celestia’s name has been fueling it with, apples?

> Enough with the obscene vehicles; you thought your rainbow armor, set with wings made you look interesting;

> Fuck, there’s like three guys with wings! There’s another guy that looked like he chucked the idea of feathers and went straight for the jetpack!

> He’s toting a suit that reminds you of Boba Fett, complete with the dual blasters!

> There’s a guy over there with wings fancier than what you ever hoped to have, complete with the Alicorn armor you were heckling Celestia for.

 “What the hell, Celestia? I thought only royalty could have that kind of cool armor?”

> She shrugs.

> “His world, not mine.”

“Alright, alright! Good afternoon, fellow Anons!”

> “Fuck off!”

> Wow, that guy’s a douche.

> All of a sudden, another Anon sprints at you, passes you without a blink, picks up Rarity, and makes a break for it.

> “Unhand me, you brute!”

“What are you doing!?”

> “I’m RapeAnon!”

“Oh, ok. Good luck! Anyhow, you are all Anons from different worlds-“

> “FUCK YOU, I’M BATMAN!”

> You give a sigh; this is going to be harder than you thought.

> Another Anon, dressed in a fancy and elegant dress that looks like he belongs in one of Shakespeare’s play, approaches you in a gaudy fashion.

> “If I may, sir.”

> You blink.

“May what?”

> “Oh, excuse me, I didn’t introduce myself, I am *ahem* MagistrateAnon, and-“

“Let me guess, you magistrate?”

> He coughs at that.

> “In a nutshell, yes. If I may, however, I would like to take your side in leading this army.”

> Say what? You should have realized that with a hundred Anons (and one communistic pony), that there would be people wanting to lead the parade.

> You look at Celestia, who, once again, takes command with a shrug.

> Before she can take the lead, however, there appears to be an Anon zealot who charged with more valiance than the entire army.

> Wielding massive dragon dildo swords, he gives a very convincing battle cry as he clears the mile in about five minutes.

> Out of breath, the Anon slaps Ganon in the face with one of the dildos, who in turn promptly sits on the poor soul and smothers him to death.

> You don’t even know what to say to that.

> Celestia: “Uh, hrm, huh. CHAAAAARGE!”

-----

> The two thousand soldiers, yourself, and the platoon of Anons charge forward with cries of vindication.

> You see what appears to be an Anon in a chef hat, wielding two sharp butcher knives and a wicked smile, followed by a cardboard box that is stealthily moving with a life of its own.

> An exclamation point appears over a  pony soldier’s head, and yet another Anon burst out of the container, donning stealth camo and a nice looking bandanna.

> Speaking of bandannas, there’s a guy that is looking like Kamina from Guren Lagann, complete with a red headrag. You kind of wish he had the orange spiky sunglasses to boot.

> Starting to heave, you’re soon outrun by some guy in a wheelchair, with two fluffy ponies dragging behind on a leash.

> They don’t appear to mind a bit.

> Waddling your exhausted ass to catch up to the fight, you already see the intense battle going on.

> Ganon looks like he’s in the middle of a Pikmin battle, with all the Anons flocking on top of him; apparently the scene needed some background music, because of them was rocking the violin while balancing on the King of Evil’s back.

> Beating on his head was a very fuming Scotsman with a broken bottle, a guy who appears to be dressed from a Waffen-SS reenactment with a leather BSDM whip, and a guy with two keyblades.

> Ganon is having a shitty day, running around like a dog on fire and roaring like he has hemorrhoids.

> A man dressed in a professionally medical apron latches himself to Ganon’s back, brandishing two scalpels and the most evil of grins.

> “Trust me, I’m a doctor!”

> Ganon howls in agony for being sent into this wretched world, unable to transform or be rid of these horrible humans.

> Standing around in a well-dressed business suit, most likely made by Rarity, he looks around idly as chaos from overwhelming fights as he takes in the sight.

> “Pretty… colors…”

> Great Jabba the Hut, is he high?

> Raikov the communist pony is now at the scene, pulling out a very hefty looking gatling gun at Ganon, who eyeballs it with fear and books it.

> “VAT, YOU DON’T LIKE SASHA? VELL, IN SOVIET RUSSIA, SASHA DON’T LIKE YOU!”

> Raikov lets loose his Soviet wrath as bullets tear into Ganon’s backside, his cries of anguish an awkward one.

> His charge is quickly stopped when the vehicle, which you notice humbly displays the name “Rapetruck” on the side, rams into his side, knocking everyone off and Ganon on his side, groaning.

> Another Anon, bearing a fashionable tie and a large revolver, scuttles by, tightens his double Windsor knot, and empties his rounds into the glowing wound of Ganon’s gut.

> Apparently this was enough to finish off the monster; or perhaps it was the guy who stuck the wicked blade, with a metal heart wrought into the hilt, in the Evil King’s head. Either works.

> Meanwhile, around the same time, the One Winged Angel is dueling off impressively against several adversaries.

> His voice is as cold and heartless as ever, clashing with some sort of cyborg warrior, who’s able to fend off the blade with his own professionally made blade.

> “I will send you back to the planet, for mother.”

> He gets smacked in the face with a Harmony Blade Aid 1 Float, which inflates into a very yellow raft. Pushing himself away from the android, he hacks at the raft in a fairly upset manner.

> “WHO THREW THAT?!”

> A wise looking man crashes down into the dirt before him, his armor of such superb design that even Sephiroth is amazed.

> “Are you… a wizard?”

> “Why yes, yes I am. I prefer the word ‘sorcerer’, though.”

> Sephiroth spreads his wing and slices the spell that was just fired at him, only to have to counter not one, not two, but three weapons at once; a paladin looking figure with a sword just as mightily large as the Buster Blade, a large hammer by a charming fellow with a devilish grin, and two viciously wicked swords, the owner being an iron vested fellow that could easily pass for a warrior from the amazon.

> “Forge is the name, how do you like mah hammer!”

> “Although this may not be as honorable as what I’m used to, I think given your strength, us three versus you is an equal match. Name’s Anon, and I tend to be a bit savage.”

> “I’m just a paladin, but through the Light and Aracrix’s edge I will vanquish you!”

> “You forgot I was here; Sorcanon is mine, but rest assured I won’t hold it against you if you forget.”

> Sephiroth sneers at this, and with a single swing blows the three attackers away, giving a smooth left kick behind him to take out the original android Anon he was fighting.

> “I always had trouble remembering the names of the people I killed… what?”

> Sephiroth feels this odd sensation, and realizes he’s been pickpocketed.

> Turning around to swing at the thief, the cutpurse is more than agile enough to dodge out of the away. Sephiroth checks to see what was taken, only to see TibbsAnon raising a black stone to the air.

> “Ooooo! Very Shiny!”

> “Hey, no, DON’T RAISE IT LIKE-!”

-----

> After having a couple of strokes and maybe a heart attack (figuratively, of course, another actual heart attack would very likely kill you) later, you finally get to the fight scene to face off against Dark Trongadonga, who’s preoccupied by that WWII tank, and about twenty different Anons, each as odd as the next.

> There’s one that has the hairdo as marvelous as Johnny Bravo himself, and he’s combing his hair while kicking at the dragon’s foot.

> Hell, one guy over there looks like he's a death knight; he's raising the dead up like there's a party down in Dragon Central or something!

> You were ready to join in and stop the dragon from crushing a particular Anon, but with heroic strength the fellow lifts the foot and tosses it aside.

> “You’re a cakewalk compared to the Marshmallow Man!”

> Another guy was- WHOA.

> Did you… do you see that right?

> You can almost SMELL the scent of Discord on that guy, not to mention there’s some Psycho Mantis funk going on here. What does he have, is that a… pink stone?

> The dragon snaps at him but misses entirely, and the person tosses the rosy stone at the menacing drake.

> Hitting it square in the eye, you can’t help but feel sorry for the tortured dragon- which doesn’t help when the pink stone turned Trongadonga into a lady dragon; the eyelashes and lipstick was evident enough to show what that nugget did.

> It a roar that shook the world, Trongadonga is now Trongadongalia.

> One of the Anons is gleefully dancing about the site;

> "Can you feel all of this LOVE!"

> This has made a questionable Anon in a hot pink dress between painting his- I mean, her toenail. That’s interesting.

> “How fabulous these just look in GREEN~!”

> But what caught your attention, aside the mad cheering over Ganon’s remains, was Sephiroth’s afterimage flipping his biscuits at an Anon, who was holding up… a…

“Oh sweet Neptune, please don’t tell me that’s Meteo-“

> You look to see that the Black Materia has indeed been activated; the moon from Majora’s Mask is now chilling in the atmosphere, apparently too eager to wait three days and decided five minutes will have to do.

“OH COME ON, HOW CAN I-!”

> Welp, there flies by the F-1 Racer, apparently he’s having a great time kicking up dust.

> The sand and dirt mix catches in your lungs, and you drop to a knee, trying to get the foreign dust out. Hacking blood, you curse the world for giving you this.

> Apparently the world decided to spite you back, because you get fucking ran over by that bloody Rapetruck, with a man in the back firing off Pinkie Pie’s Party Cannon.

> “Oh GOD, are you ok?”

> You swear you see the light, your armor barely saving you from a crushed ribcage. You do your best (which isn’t good at all) to get up, only to be helped up by an apologetic man.

“Tch… yeah… you’d think he would stop or something…”

> “I’m so sorry, I don’t think he can! I mean, I’m sure he didn’t mean too, but he really should try to fix that. Just look at you, you’re all beaten up now, and there’s a tire mark on your armor!”

> That guy, whoever he was… is so bloody lucky he didn’t touch your wings…

“Ugh… I’m fine, just… go kill something; I need to figure out to stop the 2nd moon from crashing and killing us all.”

> “Well, don’t you think that’s impossible? I mean, it is a moon after all.”

> A random Anon with sunglasses comes to the scene, looking up to witness the giant chunk of rock.

> “Eh… yup, I can take care of that.”

“Can you? I wouldn’t mind if-tch… someone else knew a good solution.”

> You clutch at your trampled breastplate, trying to somehow keep the seizing pain in your chest at bay.

> The suave looking person whips off his sunglasses like David Caruso and-

> He shoots mother-bucking LAZERS out of his eyes.

> “Unlimited POWAAAAAA!”

-----

> Now, the lazer idea was brilliant- crazy, but brilliant.

> However, the most immediate thing it did was piss off the rock with a large hole in its forehead, and made it go faster in its effort to destroy Equestria.

“Err; can you do that, like, twenty five more times?”

> He dons the sunglasses again and shrugs before walking away.

> “No can do, pal. This is a once-a-24-hour thing, ya hear?”

> So much for “Unlimited Power”.

> “Excuse me, you are the summoner Anon here, I presume?”

> You turn your head slightly from the steadily approaching meteor to the new approacher, and with his polite presence, it almost feel like there isn’t complete pandemonium about you; the true art of a gentleman.

“Uh, yeah, that’s me, how can I help you?”

> He gives a courteous bow and produces another Anon, who’s holding a piece of technology with a big. Red. Button.

> You almost immediately pounce on it, but with years of training to oppress the urge to push buttons you shouldn’t, you listen to the two chaps.

> “You see, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, but there appears to be a moon crashing down on us very soon, almost certainly killing all of us and creating even more paradoxes than needed. I’ve taken the civility of finding this gent by the name of GDIanon, who says he has the solution.”

> “Yo, that’s me. This baby here is, simply put, the button to an ION Cannon.”

“An ION… what?”

> “Err, what’s the simpler term… it’ll make that moon go ‘boom’ with it.”

> This guy’s a bit of a smart aleck, entirely contrast with the gentleman next to him.

“Eh, alright. Where is the beam going to hit down? I’m hoping it’s both coming from space and can be controlled.”

> “But of course, this is precise technology! The coordinates from the station above,”

> Ignore the fallacy of a station built in the stratosphere of Equestria.

> “And land right about… there, with an error range of about 4 meters.”

> He points right at Trongadongalia. Works for you, as you turn to the gentleman.

“Alright. Heya, could I ask you to tell those Anons to relocate themselves within thirty seconds?”

> The polite Anon salutes with a bow.

> “Most certainly.”

> He books it like Sonic on drugs, gets to the scene, and you stand there watching him make waving motions.

> Everyone looks at him, like he’s announcing the next Golden Sun game just came out, and they skedaddle away.

.> The dragon, upset at the sudden lack of attention, takes a swipe at the kind sir, who easily catches the miss’s claw, kisses it, gives a bow, and sprints on back.

> What a nobleman!

> You press the button that GDIanon is holding, and lo’ and behold, another lazer (and I say lazer because scientifically no laser could do this at this point in time) fires from the heavens above, obliterating both the ticked off moon and the dragon below, the sand turning to glass under the intense heat.

> Sephiroth, having managed to fight off twenty Anons at once, turns to see the lazer firing down, only to have an amazing martial artist trained Anon do a professional trip.

> Seph lands back into another Anon, his sword dropping in shock, as the person grabs around his head, whispering into his ear.

> “Murder’s just a game in the great scheme of things- isn’t that right, Sephy boy?”

> “M…mother…”

> The psychotic Anon snaps his snap, letting the feared villain unceremoniously drop to the ground.

> “Bleck, what a mama’s boy.”

-----

> When the battle was said and done, there rested three villains, perhaps martyrs in their own rights; forced from their natural existence to fight against an unknown foes, you soon realized that you did just the same. Who’s the real villain, here?

> As a trumpet from MusicalAnon plays in grievance, the Anon with a fairly large hat takes it off to honor the fallen.

> A different Anon  takes off his overshirt and rests it on Sephiroth’s face, the cutie mark of Luna honoring the great and defeated foe.

> The military officer looking Anon, who once sneered at the people he was forced to fight with, shed a single tear, covering his face and resting against the Sherman.

> As the sorrowful song ended, you realized three things.

> Thing Number One: Beyond pushing a button, you did JACK SHIT in that fight, unless you count being a road bump, which you DON’T.

> Thing Number Two: The entire Equestrian Army has been sitting about three-hundred yards away; attempting to charge with the new reinforcements, they stood there dumbfounded the entire time as they watched one hundred Anons (and one Communist pony) fight with brutal skills and superior technology. Even Celestia’s mouth was hanging for the past ten minutes.

> The RapeTruck is now trying to keep up with the Formula Car as they floor by; the ponies’ eyes are trying to follow it, unable to comprehend the sight.

> Oh right, Thing Number Three: The Obscure God of Fear, or whatever the hell you want to call it, has also been chilling about three hundred feet away, and is still very much alive.

> Celestia: “…”

> Luna: “…”

> The Mane Six (excluding the now absent Rarity): “…”

> The Equestria Army: “…”

> The Obscure God of Something: “.̸̸̺̟̳̾̑ͮ͋.̦͍ͨͥ̿͑.̴͂ͨͧ͂̍ͨ͝҉͖̣͍̫”

“… Well, uh, huh. Didn’t notice you guys kept back. Also kind of forgot about you, dude.”

> “Ḍ̥ͧ̒̇͌̋ͧ́Ī̡͙̱̙̪͍̳͋̋̀́̍̈́E̴̶̹̟͎̣̘̙̞̦ͭͨ̊͋͢Ẻ̥̮̯̤̞͎͕̜̖ͥ̍̍͆͜Ę̸͉̱̟̭͒ͨ̑̒͑ͤͤ̕E̳͍̹̫͍̮͇͆̒̔̾͆ͯ͜ͅE͚͈̩ͩ̋͆̀͝E͚̮͈͙̗͎͇̪̒̈̄ͫ̈͋ͭ̆ͅE̴̶̝̖̟͎ͦ̈́̍̋̃̽͡Ë͕͎̏̋̃Ẹ̸̹͇͇͈͖͈͆E̦͚̯͚̣ͬ́̓!”

-----

“HALT!”

> The tentacle, easily able to crush you, stops midair.

-----

> “Ẅ͖͕́ĥ̥͙̱͇̦̤̎̌̽ͯ̅a̧͎̮͕̠͇ͥͣ̆̈ͅt̷̘̘̾̇͂͑ͤ͞ ̠͙̞̠̜̟̞͕͑͂ͪͮͧͪ͡i̥̪͉̦͍̥͒̇͋̅̄́ͦ̚̚s̷̭̱̼̜͎͒͆̽̐̍̾ͮͣ͑ ̘̞͕̲ͫ̈ͦ̕i̸̛̝̫̹̺͆̓̒t̞̯͈̩͓̜̋́̍̆̅̄?̛̜̖̲͚̜͙̻̂ͩ͆͂ͣ̔͟”

-----

> Every Anon watches in awe as you point your finger in the most intimidating way possible.

> You could hear every single pony’s breath held, and you issue the challenge that will change the fate of the world.

“I challenge you to a Pokémon battle, three versus three! If I lose, I die a slow agonizing death. If I win, you turn into calamari and let me live in peace!”

> The writhing appendage, still above you, is paused for dramatic effects before it retracts to its core.

> A Pokémon battle stage rises from the sands, as Anons and ponies alike take the viewer seats.

-----

 

-----

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exl5W4PLcew

> You find a red hat on your head, as an Anon that looks suspiciously like you walks away after putting it on you.

“Wha…?”

> “Good luck, you…”

> The person disappears with the crowd; Anons are cheering on both sides, with the Army rooting behind out, and the Obscure God on the opposite end.

> You feel the blood flowing into again, the pressure of being alive; barely able to hold yourself up, you have the energy to fight once more!

> You grab the red hat, turn it backwards, and you point at the dark entity.

“Fluttershy, I choose YOU!”

> Fluttershy leaps from the stands, crashing onto the arena with the intensity of a dozen rampaging bulls.

> “FLUTTER FLUTTER!”

-----

> C’mon, it wouldn’t seriously be The MLP Chronicles if you used actual Pokémon.

-Tyko <3

-----

> “Anon… what am I doing…?”

“Just keep saying your name and do EXACTLY as I say.”

> “Gotcha! Oops, I mean… Fluttershy, teehee!”

> You already feel regret from your choice, but you’ll stick with your guns as your foes decides his own Pokémon.

-----

> “A̶͚͙̝̤̠̦ͪ ͕͖͈̭̘̜̯f͓͔̙̓̈l̢̟̜̅̈ͅy͚̟͚̥̜͉͌ͨị̪̼̻͔̾͂͆̒͊̀ͦn͇͕̅̽̔͌ͨ͘gͨ͐ͯ͏̩̜̻̙̠̩̦ ̻͍̜̫̳̼͚̌ͫͧ͝t̸̪̬̭̐͐̏y̺̣̲̲̬̦͗ͨͅp̯̱̝͓͍̤ͪé́̏͊̑҉̭̠͓͕,̨̂͗ͯ̏ ̞̺ͫ̾̂͋̎͐e̴̱̟̹͎͚̣̽̌̋ͮh͓̜̋̇̈̑̿͟?̯̰͆͂̐͒͛ͫ̀͠ ̭̞͕͙̼Ï̟̣̻̬̻̠͒ͬ'̋ͬ̄ͤ̊̑ͯ͏l̯͈̼̖̮̰͉l̉ͬ ͈̟̰͈̗̌ͮ̒ͤ̄s̹͝ě͔̮̺̩n͓̮̘͇̙̯̏̈̃̿̀d̡͙̟̔̍́ ͚̖̠͔̃ỏ̙͖̼̳ͭu͛ͩ̆ͤ͌͆ͥt̟ͤ̂̓͒̕.̤̯͔̯̲͖́̅ͯ.͎͇̳̦̹͇̍̎́ͦ͢ͅ.̗̤̣̬̈ ̳̹̮͔͡D͓̠͈͖̰͂̉̐E͕͙̲ͣ́̀R̛͖̦͍̝̮̼̞̍̾P͘Ý,ͩ̎̿͝ ̪̺̠͍̮̭ͦG͍̮̝̙͈̟̐͜O̲̭̱͖ͧͦ̌ͥ̑͠!̗͎̄͆ͤ̔͊̚͟”

> A shadow encroaches from the god’s side of the arena, and the reanimated Derpy appears, complete with an ominous cumulonimbus cloud.

“Oh, wow, a Derpy!”

> You pull out your Pokédex to record its entry.

> “Derpy, the Derp Pokemon.”

> “Derpy is a Flying and Electric type Pokémon. It uses its cloud clumsily to shoot lightning bolts in random directions.”

> Derpy roars with the most frightening growl you ever heard:

> “Derrrrrrrrrrrrr…py.”

“Crap, be careful Fluttershy! You’re weak against electric attacks, so don’t get too close to that cloud!”

> She looks back you with tears in her eyes, clearly not wanting to do this.

> “Flutter Fluttershy…”

> “D͇̟͖̭̫̳̍ȩ̗̪̱̬̠̻̠r͌͑̒̈́̎͋p̩͍̹̳̬͕ͯ͜ͅy,̠̠͚͚͇̈ͧ ̟̂͛͑͘u̻͎̝̝͓̝͙̎s̵̩̳͇͕͎̤ͤḙ̤͖̬̮̻ͩ ͇̝̟̩̥̓̑̑Dó͌ͮ͞u̹̞͛͌͜b̼͉͙͇̫̌̽̈̿ͯͦ̾l̯̤̯̹͑e͈̲̼̝ͧ̃̂̂͡ ̪̗͕͕̫̌̓̓̏̍͗̅͟ͅͅE͓̘̤̝̣̻͑ͤͦ̓̓͆̚ͅd̬̘̻̣̜ͮ͟g̩̈̽͛̚e͚̗̞ͯ̄̇̋͂!̨̖̼̐͐͌̇ͮ”

> Derpy revs her clouds at frightening speeds, and you barely have time to defend Fluttershy from the attack.

“Fluttershy, use Fly!”

> She hovers to about four feet.

“Higher!”

> About six feet now.

“FOR THE LOVE OF FULL HEALS HIGHER!”

> She gets to about ten feet when Derpy swoops in, entirely missing her target by about three yards and smearing into the ground.

> “U͇g̱̬͖̦̱ͤ̈ͨͦ̽͛̔͝h͎̘̬̜̹͉̥ͪ̀͘!̤͓̦̤̟̪͗̓͒ ̛̻͙̹̯͚ͮ̿ͤ̓̏̎D͕̒̋ě̞ͧ͗͑r̈́͋p̢̈́ͩ͒y̶͍̺͉̪̲̫̜̑̋͋̄̈́̒̚,̙̀͊ͦͬ͌̈̆̀ ̶̜̹̻͕͑̒͛ͩ̃t̹̣͑̐̆̀ͯ̒ͅh̥͓̠̞̩̜̉̋͌̋̌̿ũ͕̞͖̩̳̩̕n̸͕̩ͦd̗͛e̪̥̪̭̫ͪ͐̀̔r̫͔͕̮͙̘b̞̭̬̝̉oͬͮ͂̋͝l̙͖̉t̻̤̩̑ͬ̆̍̈́!̥͙̣͚̏̓̊ͯͧ͟”

> Derpy, unfazed by the crash, begins jumping up and down on the cloud, as lightning destroys the ground below it to bits.

“Err… Fluttershy, finish her with Fly!”

> Fluttershy looks at you loathingly.

> “Anon, I can’t hurt her, that’d be mean!”

> Your mouth drops.

“Uhm… do gust, then?”

> Fluttershy thinks about it for a moment, and nods before unleashing Aeolus’s fury with her destructive wind power.

> A light breeze passes over Derpy as she slowly shocks herself to death.

> You facepalm at this fight, and you’re sure that if it could, your opponent would be too.

> “U̎̀͝h̛̠̤̮ͦ̒̅.͈̝̽ͩ̇.̱̹̭̣̖̘̬ͥ́̍̉.͖̭͆͒̄ͭ̅̾͠ ̼̮̦̼y̫̣̠̑̐ͥ̓̓ͨo͚̠̝͖ͥ̅̌ͪ͗u̜̥̼͍̥͈͍ͩ͆̍̌͗̓͐ ͖̰͈̲̄̈̊ͫ̀ẃ̯̠̣̲ǡ̘̹̈n̥͕̎t̙̱̤͆́ͮͪ ͇̰̜͈͖͕͉ͨ̆̉̉ͤ͊͘t̲̻͍͍͒͆ͭ̋o̴̫̩ͨ̈́ ̱̅c͎͈̫͙̘͍ͤ͐ͣ̇̏ā̴̱̞͓͇͆ͯ̋l͙͉͕͇̙̻̇ͩ̋͒̍͢l̮͖̜̘̖̈ͅ ̦̤̟t̹͇̫̩͈͚̓̾͆̐͌ͣͬ̀h̼̟̘i͇̤̹̺̩ͅs̜̳̺͑̓̅ ̬̪̘̖̪̞r̻̗͢o̲̬̩̩͉̍͋̐u̢̺͇̤̥͔̖̝ͥͬ̉̇̚ñ̶̬͎͐̓͐͑d̤̗̖̳̻̠̝ͩ̐͂ ̸̙̥̱̟͈̥̠̑a̪̳͕̜̯͉̿̉ ̷̇d̞͚͔̩͖ͭ̂ͧ̚r̪ͣ̈́́̎̇͋ͮ́a̧̝̖̬͋w̐̊̃̽͌?̽̏̉ͫ̆̚͏̥̤ͅ”

“Yeah, please. Fluttershy, return!”

> Fluttershy plops next to you as you pet her mane, as she’s clearly pleased with her efforts.

> Derpy sinks into the abyss of darkness.

“That’s really gotta suck for her.”

> “I just don’t know what went wrong!” Was her last words as she disappears into the blackness.

> “I̼͓̝̥͖͌̇͗̆͛'͉̠̦̐ͦ̾̐̀̎͢l͈̍̄͐̕l̙̭̤͓ͯ ̓͒̕g̜̘̣͎͕̤̕o̧̲̊͋̽ͧͥ ̤̰̭̫͙̺̎̆͋̀f̮̘̰̾͘ͅi̞ͦ̀̓r͉̖͙̼͊̒͗s͛́̔̈͑̆t̃͒̄ͩ͢ ̸̘̊ͭt̻͔̭͔h̢̝͖̳̥̠͔̼̎̏i̵ͯ̈s̶̙̠͈̈́̀ͥ ̠͓̯͍̮̯͒͐̇ͯ̄̍̈t̰͈̪̺̝̝͐͝i̧͖͉̹̱̠̹͗̄ͅm̲͇̙̞͓̲̽̌̓ẽ̈̽̚҉̗̮̪̣̭̝͇.̹ͯ͗ ̫͍̼͉̆̓͗͆T̞͍̠ͬ̍̊ͫͦ͒̏r̶̗͉̤̻̥̲ͫ̈̍̈ȋ̤̠̗̪̘ͧͨ̑͟x̮̻̚͜ĭ̞̳̼͉ͩͬͩ̀e͖͇̻̻͒͊̈͛ͪͣ͆,͇ͤ̓ͣ̓ ͚̳͎̼̦̙̗ͧ́͛̇͜I̟̫̦͕͙̟ͭ̂͑̄ ̛͖̘̟̮̲̒̾͐ͯ̂c̴͈̫̩͍̰̠̏h͙̱͉̀̅ͬ̎͆̅o̠͎̗̥̳ͫ̔ͨ̍̿͂ͧ͟o̥͇̤̿̄ͥ͊̽ͅs̱͎̱̰̮̳̓̾̎ͫȅ͖͇̩̦̂ͨ͊̊̃ͪ͡ ͎͖̈́̈́͝y̤o͑ͪ̅̀̓̀̚ú̳͓͎!͕̺͖̉ͦ̅̓̍”

> The most pathetic looking shade of a unicorn you ever have laid witness in your life appears, her ghost remnants all that’s left after being killed twice.

> “Trixie.”

“A ghost type? Fine then, I’ll beat it with psychic- the enemy’s weakness, go Twilight Sparkle!”

> Twilight Sparkle teleports to the arena, ready to fight.

“Think you can fight? That last battle was a bit embarrassing.”

> She looks at you with a air of confidence, and tries her best to convincingly sound like a Pokémon.

> “Twiiiiiiiiiilight!”

> Oh Luna, what have you done to her?

-----

> Upon realizing who her foe was, Trixie’s ghost enters a dull rage.

> “Trixie…!”

> “TWIIIIILIGHT! TWI, TWI!”

“Great Chozos, Twilight, use self-restraint!”

> She looks at you with confusion.

> “But I don’t know that move…”

> “T̨̍r͈̤͛̇ḯͫ͡x̫̺̙͙́į̹̮͛̂ͭ̓ͦ͗e̵̯̳͍̽͒ͫ,͉̩̦̝̋̍̾ͣ̈̚̚ ̖̂̿̿̑̋͟u͙̣̮̩ͫͩ͘s̺̗̟̳̞̪̙ͧ̌ͥ̌͐͗͢e̷͕̟̲̮̅̓̽ͅ-͈̠̟ͫ̓̾ͣͯ͑̀!̳͙͉̤̹̑̚”

> “TRIIIXIIIIIEEE.”

> Trixie, now in an imprudent rage, writhes her apparition in ire, using a Hyper Beam.

> If we dodge it, the Princesses, Rainbow…!

“Twilight, use Mirror Coat!”

> Twilight’s eyes begin glowing, along with her entire body.

> As the red beam is launched from the remnant’s horn, it meets Twilight head-on, only to be absorbed.

“Alright Twilight, now REFLECT IT!”

> Twilight unleashes double the fury, her purple Hyper Beam blowing through Trixie and pierces through the tentacles.

> “U͔̦ͦͨ̽̉R͖̬̠̣͖̅ͬ̈́̈́ͣG̻̟ͯͮͪ̿ͫ̍͞H͉̭͟!̠̪͓̆̆ͦ̆̚”

> The once esteemed magician is scratching the back of her see through head. You can’t help but smile.

“Perhaps before you accepted, you should have gotten these~!”

> You open your breastplate to reveal eight blood crusted badges, soaked and dried from the gore off of your wounded chest.

> Thankfully the ponies, with the exception of Twilight Sparkle, saw the extent of the damage when you try to show off the badges. There are Anons and such covering their mouths at the disgusting sight; Fluttershy, still by your side, peers onto your torso and gasps in revulsion.

> Realizing the point was lost with the revolting sight, and you chuckle nervously as you close back the chestpiece.

“Err, never mind on that. Twilight, use Psybeam!”

> She looks at you again in bewilderment.

> “Anon… what does a Psybeam consist of?”

“It’s a beam of psy…chic… stuff. I don’t know, shoot something at her- OOO! Use Tri-Attack!”

> A gleam of danger sparks in Twilight’s eyes, as her horn glows brightly with the attack.

> “Ơ͔̠̼̖͕ͭͥ̌̃̉ͅh̵̫̙̦̜ͧ̑͑̓ͅ ̱ͣ̇ͣ́š̺̲͇̺̆̏̅̀͞h̫͕̳̭ͪͥ̅ͩ͑ͅi̦͔͕͉̘͕̪̇͊̏ṭͨ͢ͅ!̡̟͍̤̓ͭ͊̉ ̮̹̗̞̫̭̙ͩT͉̮͓͂ͭ͛r̯̻̗̗̋̉̂i̤̬͍͈̙͛̂͒͑x͚͕̩̲͖̗̰̔ͤͯ̈́ͯi̟͈ͬ̐͞e̠̼̲̠͓͈̲,̱̣͈̽͊͜ ͎̭͍͕̈̂u̷͎͗ͥͪ̋sͨ͜é̠̫̃͗͂̃͛ ̬̠ͦ̋̾͆̅O̧̝̠͑͋̿̚v̭̠̼͊ͧ͊̾ͬ̿ͣe̠̜̗̻͙̘̦r̭ͬ̿́̑̒h̘̩̖ͩe͎̞̪̪̘͙̣a̶̟͓̰͙t̰͈͙̙͇͙͒̓̈́͐͑̚!͊̆̌ͬ͏̪̺̙”

> Trixie catches fire somehow, in an attempt to use her ghostly form to generate heat.

> As if to add insult to energy, Twilight’s Tri Attack is charged and ready to release the angst of a thousand Porygons.

> “Canterlot Spell #15- I mean, Twi Twi Twilight TWI!”

> Lightning from Ramuh himself, with Ifrit’s fury, combined with the cold frost of Shiva’s touch unleashes in a tri fold incantation, scarring the battle field in the element’s vehemence before meeting Trixie’s oblivious presence.

> The barrage hitting her, she grunts angrily at the blow.

“It looks like Trixie is down for the count, Obscure God of Something.”

> “Nͯ̿̔̓͗͏̲̻o̗̜̘̪̬͓ṯ̡̳̲̓̉ͣͫ ̿̿̎͑̾̒͆͢y̗͚̎̏ͦ̒ͦe̺̳t̼͕̍͐̏̍ͨ̿.̥̫͔̰͔̟̂̃̋̌̋ͭ̿.̇́̎ͬ̆ͣ.̫̳͚ ͫͯ̍̾ͤ͒҉͉͇̹͓T҉̟̹r̸̪̻̯̲̗ị̬̬̹̺͆ͫ̓ͧẍ́ͯ̔̎̅ͥͭi̶̹͇͎͔̬͋e̩̙̒,͎͕ ̡̣̳̰͔̓̀R͇̰̙͔ͣ̒͂̆̄e̪̣ͧ́s̤̣̫̭̬̈́̅̇͞ͅt̠ͯͭ̓ͭ̚͘!̌̆̏̔”

> Trixie’s Ghost, taking her master quite seriously, used Rest, and dissipated from existence, having made peace with the world.

> Twilight: “… Twi?”

“Yeah, you won.”

> “WOO HOO TWILIGHT TWI!”

> The angry divine being roars in anger, the world shaking in its might for making such lousy choices.

> Suddenly, Twilight lays down, exhausted from the overkill bouts.

> “I’m sorry, Anon, but I can’t use much more magic…”

> You pick up Twilight and hug her; you do your best to ignore your legs ready to break apart.

“You… did very well, Twilight. I’m proud of you.”

> She beams at the comment, not noticing the pain in your words.

> You place her down next to the cheering Fluttershy, and try posing in victory.

“Looks like I’m 1-0, this final battle will conclude my victory.”

> wͦ̓͑ͥ̓͘ ̳̯͚̹̫̭̖͒ͯ͠t̒̂͛ͅh̨͍̩̭̬͉͚̭ͭͤͪẹ̹̘̭̲́ͪ̂ͨ̆ͨ̀̚ ̗̰̜̗̻͎̪͑͆̀ͯt̤̣̬̖̮ͤ̀̽͂r̿ͤ̇͒҉̥̘̺̣u̿̉͆̚͏͍̼͚̙e͛̑ ̪͚̲̪̙͈̒̈͋̑̍͞m͆ȩͯ̑ͨ͗a̢͕̻͉̝̤̼ͅn̖̱̭̹̪̱̈ͤͣ̅͢ͅi͕̞̞͉͉ͮ́̈n̩͎̰ͨ͗̀ͥ̐gͩͩ͗͋ͪͤ͏̳̲̰ ͉̥ͭ̓̓ͨọ̯̘̟ͩ̇ͯ̽́f̪̣͇̫̞̀̔ͪ͑̏͟ͅ ͕̳̰̝ͯ̉͂̃͋̐f̲̿̍͗̽̉̽̍̀e̛̝ͯͮ̈̆͂ͬ̐a͓̙̥̗̬ͥ̀ͩ̚r̵̤ͭ̐ͮ̓!͔͔͇̗͇́̽ͤ”

-----

> Before you can call forth your final PokéPony, Rainbow Dash calls the spotlight as she makes the stage.

> You can’t argue, considering she’s your last and best choice, but you’re still indubitably awed by her courage.

“Alright, Rainbow, let’s finish this, for HONOR!”

> “Rainbow!”

> “AWOO!”

“For LOVE!”

> “Rainbow, RainBOW!”

> “AWOO!”

“For VICTORY!!”

> “AWOO! AWOO! AWOO!”

> Anons and soldiers alike cheer, as Raikov tilts his head towards his fellow Anon.

> “Vat are dey “AVOO”ing about?”

> “I think they’re parodying the Spartans from the movie ‘300’.”

> “SVARTANS?! Bah! Vey are but toosh grabbing vocks!”

> The tentacles flail in the low boom of the old one’s chuckle, quickly silencing the encouraging crowd with the intimidating sound.

> “Y̪̩̪͙̝͒ͧ̀o̷̻͕̥̮̣u̝̩ͅ ͩl̤̫̜͙̞ä̷̯̘͉ͮụ͚ͨ͗̆ͦ̏͛͐ģ̙͔̘ͣ̐h̛̲̃̈́̉̆.̲͓.̛̯̙̮̜̼̂̑.͔̪͚̍̽͛͐̏͋ͭ ̬̫͓̗͉͍̼͒ͤ͋ͤ͐̑͞y̿̾͋̃õ͙̬̫̱͎̗̃̄u͇̘͂ e͇͟m̬̤̦̒ͫͥ͗͛͂,̟̖̥̼̜̹ͬ͒͆̋̆ ̀̿ͪ̒̎̃͏̪͕̭̝͍̹̮R̓̉̊͑ͦͬ҉̙̣̬̟͔̻̘ą̥̞̥͇͕͍ͭ́͑̉ͨͅḯ̧͙́ͬͥ̎ṉ͍̔̒̓͗̐̉̎b͓̱̓͋͞o̹͙̭̙̯͐̀w̷̲̬̼̬̗̰ͩ͂̃ͣ ͚̺̲̟ͮ̊̋ͯ͑D̪̲̫̗̔̑ͫ̅a̦̳̝̝̮ͣͮ̏͛͋ͥs̹̖̟͉͚̠ͥ̿̓̅͐h̼̝͖̝̳ͥ̄̆͑̑!̛̘͕͚̳̇ͥ̇͛̽͌̀”

> From the remains of the giant tentacle that once hosted Trongadongalia, it regurgitates a vile blob, expelling it onto the arena.

> Taking mold of the Rainbow Dash before it, a darker complexion of the speedy pegasus takes form, suited in an ebony and rubicund suit.

“This, this is…”

> The growl of the goliath entity shows that this is the fight he’s been waiting for; even if you’ve grown too far weak to make your own fight, you can trust that Rainbow Dash’s love for you will settle your final moments in triumph.

> Suddenly, a link forms between Dashie and you, a bond cold and emotionless.

> Is this… your connection with Rainbow? No, this is… crueler…

> h̬͓̬̥̪͛̋͋ͮ̉̿ả̷̮̰̮̝͇̠̃́ͧr͖ë̘̼̤̼̙͚̋ͯ̂̐̊ ̡̤̖̐y̡̻̓̎ͧo̬̖̙̱͂͐ͮ̃̉͌̓u͙͙̖̞̰̞͋̎r̟̞̗̃ ̭̙̠͕̙͔͎̑ͬͤͤ́̔ͥl͎͈͉̽̊͠ͅo̢͖̬̔ͥͪͫ͐̌v̠̜̘̱̠̯̳e̷̳̗̜͕̥͖̿̽̽'̛͉͈̞̜̺ͨs̡̼̰͎̳̰̣̻͛ ͈̖̺̬͘p̬͖̤̯̦͍͉̔͢ả̝͓̹̳̟͒i̮̣̥̰̤̰̅̐̑n̺̝͚̺͖͍̥͌ ̉̉ͬͨ̊w̷͔ͬ̽̎̌i̺ͦ͂́̃t̝̦̖̉h̬̯̞̼̓ͦͨ̀͌̇̍͘ͅ ̾̐̋ͯ͒͝y̪͖̲̔̒ͦ̃͑̚̚o̙̱̥̓̄̆̕ů͙̈́̇r͇̯̃͛̎ͮ ͖̤͙͔̮̝̙͠o̯̿̋͋ͮ̿̈́̎͠w̢͓̮̘̰̝̰͇͛̆́n͓̗̖.̳̝͚͔͐͗̑ͫ̓̓̆̕ ̧͌̓͋͛A͔͓̤̤͚͍̬͒̓͛͒ͬś̳̣̤͙͂̀ ́͡s̝̱̓ͪ̀̍̑h̆̍̆͐e̹͍̞̪̣͕͙̾̀ͤ ̷̞̭̋š̬͍̠͇́l͕͚̮̺̯̋̌ͪͨͫ͂ͫo̼̪͍ͤ̃͒ͥ̍̒̚w̝ͫ͒͌̏̓́l̟̥ͦ͋ͧ͌̍̇̀y͐ͭ̃͘ ̢͍̗̼͖͚̲̍̂̐ͭḷ̩̞̙͐͋ͯ̽͒o̿̍͌͗͑ͭ̾҉͈s͔̱̥͓̳e͕̻̯̟͕s͓͚̩̣̮̬̜̐ͮ,ͥ̑ͬ͏̱̪̤ ̸̹̰̰̺̩͎̇̃ͥ͑̔yͭ͞o̝͚͂̅ͩͩ̒͋̽u͊̂̆ͩ ̹̬̐̆̀ͧt͈̜̱̞̘̋̄ͯǫ̭̳̺̲̙̘͓̓ͧͨơ͓̲̙̩̒͋̆ ̼̳̩̥̟̗ẅ̧ǐ̥̌̋ͮ̑l̢͚l̎̐͒ ̸̲͈͔͇ͫ͗s̩͇̱̈́̓͂ͭ̔̽ͩl̯̠̃ͭ̓̍ŏ̧͓̽̃ẉ̣̹ͯͬͭ͘ͅl̹̖͙̼̃̉͆̊͠y̱̲̐̉ͯ͂̈́̃ ̶̮̭̻̗̞̺̟̂̌͛̏p͕̩͓̀̓̉̆e̙̖̫ͫ͆ͮr͈̣͈̙̐͝ĩ͚̼̭̺̪̅̓̿̈ͫ̿s͔̝͙̿̅͗ͅh̨̻̤̻.͍̓̉̂ͮ̿̑”

> Rainbow: “No, I won’t allow that, if Anon gets hurt anymore when I protect him, I, I-“

“I accept these terms.”

> The crowd, ready to boo at the fresh occurrence, shuts up before they could land a single word. Someone dropped their large hat in shock.

> “But, Anon, you can’t! If you get hurt anymore, you’ll… you’ll…”

“You won’t lose, and this is fitting. Through our teamwork, we will emerge exultant!”

> “AWOO!”

> They’re seriously getting annoying, but it was enough to quell the tears Rainbow Dash was ready to shed.

> You kneel down, your gauntlet hanging out in a balled fist.

“Let’s beat this fucker, together this time.”

> Rainbow Dash looks at Twilight and Fluttershy, who both nod in agreement, before she gets her cocky grin back on. That’s the Dashie you know and love.

> She completes the brohoof, and turns around to face her own dark doppelganger.

> “Alright! Time to take out the adorable trash!”

-----

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zpITTJiw7Q

“Rainbow Dash, use Agility! Time to display this realm just how fast you can get!”

> She doesn’t even bother saying her name, as the stone floor is torn at her flight.

> If it weren’t for her spectral trail, not even you could trace where she was, as she dominates the floor with sheer acceleration.

> Before you know it, she’s covering every inch of the arena, an unstoppable force to be reckoned with. The Dark Dash hasn’t even moved, awaiting orders.

“Alright, Dashie, hit her with a quick attack!”

> “Ḍ̟̗̜̭̫͗̎o͔̯̰ǘ̲͚͔͉̦̞ͤͦ̍́̎͟b̩̮̠̰̭̱ͬ̎̃͊ͭ̋͒l̙ͣ̈ͣ̊̔ĕ͚̲̯̦ͪ̓ͯ̈ ̳͉͉̤̥̓ͤ̈́ͅẗ̬̯͕̳̥̜̼̀͑ͯ̾͋̓ě̩̱͍͔̳̓̋ăͣ͏̗̦̥͓͙m̙̪̤̗̩̲.̼̝̺̭͖̙̈ͪ͂̒ͤ͆̾ͅ”

> Anti-Rainbow (yes, you just said that), teleports with fade images of itself, almost as fast as Dashie herself.

> As Dash moves in for the kill, a rocketing pillar of sky blue, Anti-Rainbow avoids it just in time, leaving Rainbow to slam into the ground.

> Now, for Rainbow Dash, that was absolutely nothing; she’s taking far worse dives and come out unscathed.

> But her high tolerance to flight injuries isn’t matched by your own, the agony of the crash sending you falling to a plated knee.

> You do your best to show that you’re fine, ignoring that you just had your midriff ruptured, but the noise was enough to distract Rainbow.

“Tch… gyuh… Rainbow… FLY!”

> She looks at you after swiftly recovering, hearing the distress in your voice.

> “Anon! Are you alright…?”

> “B̽̈́̑́̀҉̙o͉̔̒̀̎dͨ̋̑͋͏͚͚y̴͎͗͊̍ ̥̦̆̔̋s̤͖ͨ̔͘l̑͛͡ȁ̌̒m̈́ͥ͏̼͖̬̜̥͙.͎͇͎̙͓̟̬̓͛̿ͬ͆̒̀”

> Before Dashie could turn to face the attack, she’s struck ferociously in the ribcage and sent sprawling across the arena, dust trailing her as she scrapes across the pavement.

> The blow was a kidney punch stronger than Captain Falcon, and you drop to the floor like a lead balloon, unable to catch your breath as your inners are meshed in torture.

“GYUHHHAHHHH!”

> Twilight tries to reinforce the healing spell to help you faster, only to find it useless.

> “But, I… it’s not working, why?”

> Fluttershy: “Anon, you can’t do this!”

“Tch… this isn’t just an injury… I’m also naturally…dy… UGH!”

> With a will beyond your own, you destroy muscle tissues constraining yourself to your feet, the blood pounding in your ears. You’re losing sight and hearing-

> But you can still see one thing, and that’s your special some*pony, struggling to stand up.

“RAINBOW DASH!”

> You see it now: the bond that shares your pain, but something more; the oath connecting to each of you, a pledge to forever be by each other’s side.

> You grab it with your hands, performing the impossible as you unleash your wavering energy through it.

> You feel your aura pulsing with your declining heart as it pours down the chains of love, reaching Dashie and enveloping her with the power of affection.

> “What…? What is this, Anon…?”

“My love, my heart! It beats only for you, and it will flow through you with an awesome power!”

> You feel your deteriorating pulse giving its final struggle to revitalize Dash, as the energy conforming to her body takes a form of a suit.

> Entirely ocean blue with a lightning bolt running down her torso, along with bolts encircling each of her hooves, she looks at her outfit with astoundment.

> “I’m a… Wonderbolt…!”

> You shout your words, ignoring the blood catching in your throat.

“Dashie, WIN!”

> Not exactly an attack, but it was enough to compel her.

-----

> Pulling down your savior’s goggles, you cast one last spell to make your armor turn rigid, your last bits of magic freezing it in place so it holds you in position… no matter what.

-----

> It appears Dashie has turned Super Saiyan with this new revelation, the ground exploding as she disappears, only to reappear as she tackles Anti-Rainbow with a velocity of an F-14 Fighter Jet.

> You feel the pain surging from the recoil, but you hold silent as your tears fall from the beautiful sight, Vinyl’s goggles hiding your face in your desperation.

> Apparently the Obscure God is shocked by the development as well, his fighter standing up in bewilderment as she’s smeared by a Rainbow Dash coming from impossible angles.

> “Ṇ̴͍̖͉̮̫̳̋̌́ͬÖ҉̪͈!̯̣̅̔ ̖ͪ́Ủ͈s̍̄͊̿̈́̾̒e̜̠̻͚̬̊͞ ̰̞͕͖͂w̟̗͔̣ͬ̉͑́̚i̷͙̞͍̔ͮͦ̄̀ͭn͚̯̱̩̱̯̭̒̍ͭͭg̲̫̬ ̻̺̯a̬̺̩̠͕̎͆ͪ͐͆ͅt͙̦̍ͬͩ̇̎̚t̩̘̰̲͖̬ͮ̈́̌a̜̬̙̜͐c̪̟̠̱̈́̏͘k͑̈͛͋̇̚!̤̙̘͈̿̔̄͑͆͜”

> The dark pegasus gladly obeys, only to be countered by a rocketing demon of colors as one of the wing snaps off from the collision, the oozing remains evaporating away.

> You feel each blow like Muhammad Ali turning you into a punching bag, your teeth literally cracking from clenching your jaw.

> You can’t even speak now, going blind from the suffering; all you hear is Rainbow Dash,

> “And for the final blow, SONIC RAINBOOM!”

> You feel the motion of you falling onto your back like a domino, yet you suddenly lose the feeling of pain. A bright light consumes your sight, and soon following it came darkness.

> You held no fear, no regrets; you won a hard earned victory with the coolest pegasus in Equestria, a battle won in front of thousands of ponies and Anons alike, and you feel your heart giving its last stand.

> Sadly, you’re tugged back into vision with Luna and Celestia over you, casting spells after spells on your crushed body.

> You feel almost wonderful; the sudden lack of pain, along with no sensation at all, has left you in a seemingly delightful state.

> You lean up to the shock of the viewers, as cheering Anons come pouring down; a smoldering bubble of Anti-Rainbow’s remains in a large crater, as the once appalling god yells in muted vanquish as it shrinks into a small Japanese dish.

> You feel pats on your shoulders, unable to distinguish the flow of time, as Anon after Anon left, unknowing of your state, as they shuffled back into the portal of which they came from.

> You don’t realize that Rainbow Dash was already in your arms, cheering with every other pony around you, having defended their Kingdom from a terrible evil.

> You don’t even feel yourself standing and walking forward onto the arena, the tears filling the goggles as you mutter your feelings of romance to the crying Dashie in your arms, glad to finally be with you after so much pain.

> You don’t even catch the muffled screams of the ponies behind you, as Rainbow Dash snuggles into your arms, closing her eyes for a well-deserved rest.

> You don’t even feel it as Dash is shoved out of your arms, and you look down in shock to see that a gloved hand has burst through your chest, blood shooting out through the leather.

> What is this, a death scene from Resident Evil? You’d think you would have noticed Wesker popping into the picture…

> You make out the voice that whispers into your ear, the only thing you managed to properly perceive after that terrible fight;

> Nona: “I told you… I was going to kill you.”

> Oh. Alright.

-----

> http://www.youtuberepeat.com/watch/?v=aFtDCbE0raE

> You feel a twinge of fault as the arm exits your body, a hefty hole left in your chest as you nearly crash onto Dashie in your conquest to the stone floor.

> You’d think pain would take you on a journey, but either your head or SOMETHING was tired of reminding you that you hurt, and your face rests on its side, the puddle of blood vastly pouring out around you.

> You feel magic surrounding you as you’re twisted into a sitting position, your entrails sickeningly poking out of your chest.

> You can hardly feel as the horrified Princesses are doing their best to hold your insides in place, as a despairing Twilight unleashes every last ounce of her strength to seal the wound.

> You see a faded view of Nona smugly crossing his arms, his lips moving but no words coming out, yet you somehow can make out his sentence;

> “It doesn’t matter what you do, he’s already dead.”

> You see the world’s threads tearing apart, unweaving as you perish. In your last humor, you imagine how long it would take grandma to crochet something like this.

> You suppose you’ll have all the time in the world, considering you’re seeing her soon.

> Fluttershy is tugging at your leg, the armor dispersing; her tears drive your heart to pump one more time, as each weak motion slows to a halt.

> Luna and Celestia both are pressed behind you, still trying to heal you in desperation while they hold you up.

> The rest of the Mane Six, along with the entire Army, lower their heads in tears and grief, their friend and hero falling through their arms and dreams.

> But most importantly, Rainbow is back in your arms, her tears pouring down her face, the drops of sorrow traveling down her new Wonderbolt suit as blood runs past her hooves.

> In your very last ounce of strength, you raise your hand, the armor dissolving, and press it against her cheek, wiping the tears.

“Y…you’re… a Wonder…bolt, now… Dashie…”

> Your bloody palm rests under her chin, as she shifts to put it on her mane, the blood not even close to bothering her.

> “Y-yeah… I am… ain’t I…?”

> You give a croaking grin, a trickle of blood coming out of the corner of your lips. You see the world melting away, as soldiers fade into the void.

> You see the darkness overtaking you and the Equestria you hold so dear.

“H…hey… Dash…?”

> She comes closer, as your heart finally gives out, stopping in its final throes.

> “Anon…?”

> Nona, sighing at the embarrassing sight, can’t help but shed his own single tear as he walks into the negated realm of nonexistence.

> You pull her as close as you can, and you mutter your finishing words:

“I… love you, my little Rainbow Dash.”

> You press her with your final ounce of will, driving your kiss to her lips, as your sight is taken over by darkness.

> Falling back in slow motion, your hand runs down her face in a trail of blood as you clash with the ground, the realm taken by everything but her and you.

> As you pass on, you hear her final words as well;

> “I love you too, Anon.”