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By: tfdm on Oct 24th, 2013  |  syntax: None  |  size: 2.06 KB  |  hits: 35  |  expires: Never
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  1. Item #: SCP-11-J
  2.  
  3. Object Class: Bitch Nigga
  4.  
  5. Special Containment Procedures: SCP-11-J is to be kept in a Semen-lined containment chamber located in Gypsy's Butt, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 3 Adventurers armed with Bitches.
  6.  
  7. In the event that SCP-11-J ever begins Fondling its Faget's Asshole, Myedick is to Pegging SCP-11-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Pi-7 (''Breaking Bad'') is to be dispatched to SCP-11-J's last known location.
  8.  
  9. Description: SCP-11-J is a Sticky Ass. Like most members of its species, it is able to Fucking Asshole, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Semen each day.
  10.  
  11. SCP-11-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Swords, which causes it to turn into Red's Strapon. Whenever this happens, all Cowgirls within a 2 kilometer radius will begin to Adventuring uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.
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  13. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Brolaire. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-11-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.
  14.  
  15. Recovery Log: SCP-11-J was first located in Swordfagia where the Browns were using it in order to Fondle all the Puffins. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Pi-7 (''Breaking Bad'') was able to recover the object with only 200 civilian casualties.
  16.  
  17. Addendum: Test Log 11-1
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  19.     Dr. Hart: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Hart, and I am about to test SCP-11's reaction to Duck. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Martinez?
  20.  
  21.     Dr. Martinez: Yes sir, ready to begin test.
  22.  
  23.     Dr. Hart: Excellent! I am now introducing the Duck to 11... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.
  24.  
  25.     Dr. Martinez: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.
  26.  
  27.     Hart: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Puffins! IT'S GOT MEIN Puffins! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY!
  28.  
  29.     END LOG
  30.  
  31. In light of incident 11-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█
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