Young Dog, Old Tricks

>Day getting wasted in Equestria.

>You're Anonymous. Young, dumb, and full of cum.

>And trapped in the Magical Horsepocalypse, known as Equestria.

>There could be some exposition on how you settled in, but that's not what this story is about.

>And frankly no one would really give a shit on how well you've adapted into society if you're still alive.

>Anyway, it's friday, you ain't got no job, you ain't got shit to do!

>Why not go out and get Gucci man wasted?

>Your best bros Thunderlane and Bulk Biceps decided to tag along. Getting drunk amongst friends is always the best after all.

>So the trio of you decided to hit up Ponyville's premier watering hole, "The Whiskey Spit."

>The three of you had been there for some time. Thunderlane was already tipsy, and Bulk was working up a good buzz.

>You're still sober as all get out. Pony alcohol is weak shit.

>It's like watered down Kool-aid.

>"So Anonymush, wud ya do her?" Thunderlane slurs out drunkenly, pointing to the trio of Flower Ponies in the corner, chatting amongst themselves.

>You shrug.

"Roseluck...ehhh. maybe. Daisy? Nope. But I'd massacre Lily."

>You take a sip of your drink.

>Thunderlane, and Bulk let out some chuckles.

>You look around and see Rainbow Dash and Applejack at the bar knocking back shots.

"What about them Bulky?"

>He looks in the direction you're pointing.

>"....YEAAAAH."

>You roll your eyes.

>That's what he always says. How stupid of you to think otherwise.

>Bulk looks around and spots a mare sitting by her lonesome at the far end of the bar, and points to her with his muscle-addled hoof.

>She stands out, considering she's wearing more clothes than most of these ponies wear at any given time.

>"What about her? Would you?"

>You cock an eyebrow.

"It depends. I'd have to see her face."

>Thunderlane smiles deviously.

>"Anonymush..Ey jus got a wekked idear.."

"You're gonna sober up? Because I can't understand a damn thing you're saying."

 

>"Oh go to tautarus."

>He waves your jab off.

"So what. What is this amazing idea that spawned in your tiny pony brain you lush?"

>He grins, teetering a little.

>"Fifty bits says you won't go try and pick up that mare with the jacket."

>Fifty bits?

>You look back at her.

>She turns her head in your direction, and OH MY GOD.

>Crows feet out the ass.

>A gruff, angry unimpressed demeanor.

>Old lady alert alarms are buzzing through the roof.

"Dude! Look at her! She's like seventy!"

>"Ha! Wuss."

>"I'll go do it. No mare can resist these guns!"

>Bulk flexes and kisses his biceps/

"You'll try to pick up any mare Bulk. You're that desperate."

>Thunderlane snickers.

>"Yeah? Well your mom didn't think so!"

>"Oooooh snap! No he di-int!"

>You cross your arms and lean back with lowered eyes, and a smirk.

"I can't see that happening as you don't have a dick or balls from all those roids you took."

>Thunderlane breaks out laughing, banging his hoof on the table.

>Bulk turns red.

>"Sh-shut up! I don't take those!"

>You rub your forehead.

"Fifty-bits huh?"

>Thunderlane nods.

>"Wait! Wait! Bring back an article of her clothing as proof you did the stable tango."

>Bulk snorts happily.

"Still with that sniffing fetish huh?"

>He crumples up a napkin and throws it at you.

>You laugh and slide out of your seat.

"Shit! Okay! Okay! I'll do it. Just have my money ready ladies."

>"Yeah yeah."

>"Tell me how the ground tastes when you crash and burn."

>You flip them both off, and slap your cheeks.

>Cougars are definitely not your fetish, but if there's profit to be gained..you'll stick your dick into pony Rosa Parks here.

>You put your hands into your pockets, and cautiously step towards the dressed mare.

>She's leaning over a small glass of brwon liquid, with a grumpy expression.

>Wow. Who shit in her cereal?

>You look back to your buddies.

>They both wave you on with shit-eating grins.

>You bite your bottom lip and continue on.

>You slowly take the seat next to her.

 

>Her Sky-Blue peepers flash to you then away briefly.

>She sighs and turns away, leaning on her hoof.

>You look around the bar, nonchalantly.

>AJ and RD are still slamming shots away, in some ridiculous competition.

>Thunderlane and Bulk are watching you intently.

>You turn to the mare.

"So uhm..Hey..?"

>She doesn't respond.

"Am I bothering you?"

>Still nothing.

>She looks at you over her wither.

>"Are-are you talking to me?"

>You force a smile and avert your sight for a second and then train it back on her.

"Yeah..yeah I am. Am I bothering you?"

>She rotates completely, facing you.

>"Wh-why no! Not at all!"

>Her grumpy expression is slowly fading away, to a proud haughty one.

>She smiles at you warmly.

>Uh..what should you say?

>Perhaps starting out simple works. Been a while since you watched "How to be a player".

>You hope based Bill Belamy's lessons will apply here.

>You decide to start with small talk.

"So uhm..how are you? What brings you here?"

>Smooth retard.

>She plays with her earring with a hoof.

>"I just got off work. I travel all over Equestria, as a judge for various sporting events and thensome."

"Oh? A sports judge? Like what?"

>She smiles, and puts her nose into the air.

>"Nothing much..Just the Equestrian Games. You heard of it?"

>Wait.This seems awfully familiar.

>Checklist!

>Gussying self up in convo to raise appeal.

>Check.

>Bragging about a prestigous job?

>Check.

>More confidence than a Jersey Shore faggot?

>Check.

>Only one last item and you'll know for sure.

"Yeah. I heard of it. It's a big sporting event held in the Crystal Empire correct?"

>"Half-correct my dear. See I pick the locations where those games will be hosted."

"Damn! That is impressive."

>She giggles, and leans on a hoof, looking at you while trailing another hoof around the rim of her glass.

>"So...can I buy you a drink?"

>Offers to buy a drink to gain favor.

>Check.

>This mare is trying to pick YOU up.

 

"Sure..sure. I'd like that."

>She sniggles, giving you...hm. How can this be described?

>It's like she's angry,but she's giving you bedroom eyes while smiling.

>She taps the bar's surface.

>A pony with a handlebar moustache trots down to you both.

>"Did you want something Whinny?"

>"Get my cute friend here, An Alicorn Iced-tea."

>She places the order without looking away from you.

>Fifty bits. Fifty bits!

>"Ohoho! Looks like you finally reeled one in! Looks like the drought is over huh! Dusting off those coochie cobwebs?"

>You stifle a laugh.

>The mare leers at the bartender with a black look.

>"You utter one more word other than a "Yes ma'am" and I'll have this place faster than you can say Rainbow Dash."

>Oh mai! Granny in charge up in here.

>He puts his hooves up in defense.

>"Alright! Sheesh! Keep your socks on Whinny! Gosh."

>He trots off to fix the drink, irritated.

"So is that your name? Whinny?"

>She focuses her attention back on you.

>"It's HarshWhinny..but, I can be a screamer at times."

>She winks and licks the front of her teeth.

>Oh ew.

>The bartender returns with your drink.

>You thank him, taking the beverage in your hand.

>HarshWhinny observes you, crossing her hind legs, and recrossing them.

>As you start to drink, your eyes wander down to her nethers.

>She purposely, spreads them, giving you a view of her exposed marehood.

>You gag on your drink.

>Cougars aren't your fetish, but public exposure is.

>"I heard about you, you know. You're that human Anonymous..right?"

>You fight the quickly growing boner in your pants, and cough, nodding frantically.

>She giggles again.

>"You're a cute little thing, aren't you?"

>You wipe your mouth, and smile at her with uneasiness.

"I'm told I can be charming at times, yes!"

>Your voice is cracking. chill out nig.

>She scootches her seat a little closer to you.

>"So are the rumors...true?"

>Rumors?

"What rumors?"

>She rolls her eyes, with a smile on her mug.

>"About human stamina.."

 

>Your eyes dart left and right, and back to her.

"Wh-what about it?"

>She starts to stroke your forearm with her hoof.

>"That your kind can go allll night long...or so I heard."

>She looks into your eyes, suggestively.

>You gulp.

"Y-yeah I guess.."

>She closes her eyes and hums.

>"I see..You wanna..get out of here?"

>You clench the glass tightly.

>Fifty bits Anonymous.

>Fuck it. Get paid and blow this mare's insides out. Alpha up man.

"Sure. Why not?"

>She smirks at you and twists, and hops off her seat.

>You slide off of yours and follow her.

>She's swishing her tail, and hips as you follow behind her out of the bar.

>You look over to Thunderlane and Bulk.

>The fuckers are guffawing over there.

>You flip them off one more time before disappearing to the outside.

>Harshwhinny stands waiting on you.

>"So? My place or yours?"

>You gulp again. You're really gonna do this.

>you can't let her know where you live. One-night stands are more difficult to get out of your place than theirs.

"Your place?"

>She nods, still grinning.

>"Follow me then, handsome."

>You scratch your head and breathe out.

>The walk to her place is surprisingly short. It must be convenient to be able to get drunk and hop, skip and jump back to your home in distance.

>You come to a sizable cottage, near the outskirts of Ponyville.

>She opens her door and allows you in first.

>"Please. Make yourself at home."

>You walk in and look around.

>It looks like an old man's study with a red armchair, and lined with bookshelves of books, and a fireplace with a mounted Manticore head above it.

>A glass flask of brown liquid sits on a small table next to the armchair.

"Pretty impressive place you have here."

>"Thank you. I try to keep it, "simple"."

>Simple my ass. You wonder how much you'd have to make to even get a portion of this for your pad.

>You notice a case filled with various trophies.

"You're quite the achiever huh?"

>She chuckles lightly.

>"I get around, yes."

 

>Your hands are getting clammy.

>You feel a soft gust of wind hit your ankles.

>You look back at HarshWhinny.

>She's hung her jacket and scarf up and shut the door.

>"Let me show you the rest of my house. Come in me..oops..I mean with me. If you will."

>She gives you a mischievous smirk.

>It's like a cheesy porn right now.

>All you need is a pizza.

>See what I did there? Cheese? Pizza? aaaaahh you get it.

>She beckons you down a hallway into another room, her hips swaying the whole time.

>It's her bedroom.

>Totally didn't see that coming.

>It's as decked out as the study. Like something out of those Fable games you used to play.

>She slowly climbs onto her bed and lays atop, smiling at you seductively.

>"So? What do you think of my place?"

"It's pretty nice. I wish I had a spot like this myself."

>"Oh I'm sure yours is just as nice."

"I wish."

>"Well maybe you'll allow me to see it someday."

>Ha! You wish.

"Uh..s-sure..."

>You kick the ground softly.

>She watches you and jabs a hoof out at you, and curls it back towards her.

>"Come now anonymous. don't be shy. Join me on the bed.."

>You gulp once more and shuffle over to her comfort.

>You shakily sit down.

>She moves over next to you, her nose breathing softly alongst your neck.

>"Have you ever been with an older mare..?"

>You shake your head.

>"Excellent. Then let's get started."

>You can feel your pores open up from her warm breaths of air.

>HarshWhinny brings her lips to your neck, and places a gentle kiss alongst your jawline.

>You involuntarily moan out.

>Her subtle, gentle actions are slowly turning you on.

>She snickers, licking your earlobe.

>Your heart starts to beat hard.

>She brings a hoof to your opposing cheek and turns your head towards her.

>Her aged lips connect with yours.

>Despite their appearance, they are incredibly soft.

>She pries open your mouth with her tongue, and thus the battle for dominance between yours and hers.

 

>Your mouth begins to salivate heavily from the taste of her alcohol, flavored tongue kiss.

>A bit begins to flow out the side of your gullet.

>She breaks the kiss, and licks her lips.

>You're blushing heavily.

>You get a feeling it's not her, who's going to get "blown out".

>"Off. Now."

>You mechanically comply and stand up, beginning to undress.

>HarshWhinny watches you, with a satisfied grin.

>You kick off your shoes, and remove your top half.

>You unbutton your pants and prepare to slide them and your briefs down in one swoop.

>"Wait. Let me step in here sexy."

>You instantly release them and put your hands at your side, like the subservient bitch you're acting like.

>Alpha the fuck up! She's dominating you.

>HarshWhinny slides off her bed and puts her hooves on both sides of your thigh and slides your pants and underwear down.

>Your throbbing erection springs up and lightly slaps her cheek.

>She giggles.

>"Some human's a little excited hm?"

>You exhale hard, from the sensations of her breathing on your rod.

>You close your eyes, and pray to whoever is watching you, to give you the strength to hold out.

>Your knees buckle, when the moist, and hot feeling of HarshWhinny wrapping her mouth around the tip of your cock, sends electricity through your entire body.

>She gives it a firm suckle, while looking up into your eyes.

>This mare has skills man.

"Oooo-ooooh shit.."

>She sniggles and takes your meat in deeper into her mouth.

>You clutch her head, and suck your stomach in.

>She's gonna make you cum, just from this alone.

"G-guh gaaah..."

>You reposition your legs and prop your arms on her bed to keep from doubling over.

>Her head is slightly tilted back, and eyes widened.

>Time to attack.

>You take one hand and place it on the back of HarshWhinny's head, and slowly pump yourself in and out of her slick mouth.

>Horses can't throw up, so you're going throat deep nigga.

>You begin to roughly throat fuck the cougar pony, much to her surprise.

 

>Her eyes start to roll back, and her nose runs.

>"Gloogh..gluurrk..glllaaagh.."

>The sounds of her gagging, serve to imbue you with more sexual drive.

>You push your veiny staff in and out of her mouth, your urethra kissing the back of her throat with each push.

>She taps your legs a few times.

>You retreat from the confines of her mouth, panting.

>She starts coughing and hacking, bent over.

>"You-koff koff- You're no slacker, after all..-koof-"

>She's awoken a beast in you. A beast that had yet to experience the joys of sex with someone older than you.

>A beast of lust.

>You snatch up HarshWhinny in your arms and fling her onto the bed.

>"O-oh my!"

>She bounces on her back, and sprawls out.

>You grin at her with hungry eyes.

>She looks back equally hungry.

>She grits her teeth in a lusty smile.

>"Then come take it!"

>You grab her hind legs and lift her lower half so her marehood and anus are exposed and in your face.

>You lick your chops.

>"This position..! I haven't been in this position since I was a young maaaaaaaaooooooh~!"

>You cut her nostalgia off, by sliding your tongue into her winking genitals.

>You trace the finer details of her folds with the tip of your tongue, before slowly sliding it inside.

>"Uhh--haaah~ It feels so good!"

>Her walls squeeze and tug your tastebud studded muscle, as if you entered her with your manhood.

>You can hear her breathing increase, as you lap at her opening, while pressing your chin on her puckered back door.

>A small spurt of liquid shoots from her hole, and splashes onto her breast.

>HarshWhinny's face is contorted into a mindless mask of desire, her mouth opened wide, and eyes half open.

>"Ooohhh...Ce-celestia...!"

>You pull back, and take a trip downstairs to her rosebud.

>You creep two fingers into her snatch and slowly pump them in and out of her, while you begin to work on her butthole next.

>You lick at its wrinkled exterior, while pistoning your digits in and out of her.

>"Hunnh~! Hunnh~!"

 

She releases a breathless squeak as you plunge in up to your knuckles.

>Her anus begins to expand and contract in arousal.

>She's more than ready, if the flowing juices, she's pouring out is any sign.

>You remove your fingers and hold and allow her to fall down.

>She looks off to the side, panting with her tongue out.

>Her blue eyes are hazy colored, and she has a happy, tired grin.

>You recognize this look, but you never thought you'd see it in real life.

>Ahegao.

>Your stick however doesn't care for paltry observations. You're inclined to agree.

>You roughly flip her over onto her stomach.

>She offers no form of resistance, as you position yourself over her.

>You prod her hole with your head and rub it around.

>She whimpers, snapping out of her sexual stupor.

>"Do-don't tease an old l-lady. Jam it i-in. Rough me up you young p-punk."

"...Yes Ma'am."

>You slam your cock into her mature slit, hilting instantly.

>"OOOOOOOOoooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees~!"

>Her head shoots up and she paws at her bed, with a manic look on her face.

>You release a howl of pleasure, at the acceptance her innards are greeting you with.

>They wrap, and hug your sensitive meat, and begin to caress it.

>You can feel her heart beat.

>HarshWhinny collapses onto her bed.

>Ha! This old broad is a "cum on insertion" type huh?

>She better get ready to cum a lot more then.

>You take your shaft out of her hole, and jam it right back in.

>"Nnnnggggghhhh AAAH~!"

>She curls her head and moans loudly, screaming almost into her covers.

>She is a screamer.

>You start to savagely thrust into her depths, the sounds of her moans, your grunts and skin slapping fur, echoing throughout the cottage.

>Her tail is elevated straight up into the air, and her anus is expanding and contracting again.

>You pound into her, clenching her supple plot cheeks with both hands.

>Your knees muscles begin to ache into your thigh muscles.

>Your exercising muscles you never gave attention to before.

 

>Feeling adventurous, you ease a thumb into her butt.

>It fights back at first, but initially accepts the foreign invader entering through the wrong side of its exit.

>"Guuooohhh...I haven't--nnnnngggghh..haven't had that-oooooonnnnggggh! Hole played with in for-ooooohhh! Ever!"

>You push into her so hard, her smaller frame begins to sink into the bed with each vaginal assault.

>She starts to tap the bed, as if she were in a submission hold.

>"Anonymous...Oh celestia..Oh sweet celestia!! I can't take much mooooogggghhhh~ more...!"

"That's...haaah~ fine..I'm near too.!"

>Your stomach curdles, and you can feel the dam walls of your testicles slowly opening.

>You remove your cock with a wet squelch, and thumb from her anus with a pop, as a torrent of her fluids, bursts forth from her trench.

>She arches in an orgasmic moan, before you flip her over.

>You step over her face, your balls tapping her chin lightly.

>You cradle her mind-broken face and begin to stroke yourself, feeling the culmination of your efforts quickly approaching.

>HarshWhinny opens her mouth, and gives your scrotum a quick lap.

>That was all the help needed, as globby strings of your life-creating milk pours spurts into her mouth, lips, and nose.

>A stray strand surpasses all those before him and lands across her closed right eye.

>She closes her mouth and swallows your cream, with a content sigh as the two of you pant breathlessly.

>The room is humid and reeks of intercourse and sex.

>You fall to her side and stare at the ceiling, catching your breath.

>That shit was WILD.

>It was like there is no difference between an older mare and a younger one with Harshy.

>She takes a hoof and cleans off your spunk with a hoof and brings it to her mouth, licking it off as if it were frosting on a spoon.

>"Delicious..I missed this taste."

>You remain quiet.

>"Thank you Anonymous. You truly do not disappoint."

"I aim to please."

>"You did more than please me..I'd give you a trophy if I had one."

 

>You let out a laugh.

>She rolls over and places her head on your chest, breathing softly.

>You both bask in the sweet afterglow of an intense session for a while.

>"....So?"

"So?"

>She leans on your chest and looks into your eyes.

>She has a somber look about her.

>"I know this was probably one-time thing, but I still want to say thank you for giving an old mare past her prime like me, the night of her life."

>Is she kidding? She turned you into a ravenous beast, and she's thanking you for it!

>She gives you a little kiss on the lips.

>"I won't tell anypony, what we did tonight. You can go if you want."

>She slowly climbs off the bed, with her head hung.

>You lean up and look at her incredulously.

>You get off the bed also, and scoop her up from behind.

>She lets out a yelp of surprise as you bring her back to bed.

>"What are you--?"

>You shut her up with another kiss.

>She moans into it and wraps her legs around your neck.

>You break it, and bump foreheads with her.

>She looks into your eyes, elated.

"So what are you doing tomorrow night?"

>Looks like a young dog can be taught old tricks.

 

END