Title:           Anon and RD
Author:          mobile_writefag
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/9XbmJaVH
First Edit:      Saturday 19th of March 2016 06:21:16 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 19th of March 2016 06:21:16 PM CDT

>RD asks Anon if she's attractive.
 
>You look up from your coffee.
"Huh? You're asking me?"
>"Yeah. I mean, you're like, a friend and I respect you so... Am I attractive?"
>You set down your cup with a soft sigh.
"Hard to say, really. Especially for me."
>"Well, don't get all complicated. Just yes or no."
"...Yes."
>"Wait, really? That simple?"
"Do you want the answer or the why?"
>She scrunches up lightly, as if she's curious to ask, but really doesn't want to hear the long version.
"I'll give you the cliff notes."
>"The what?"
"...Human term. Cliff notes were a study book for school kids that more or less gave you enough of whatever you needed to know to barely pass while not reading the whole book or paying attention."
>"Oh. That seems pretty handy."
"It was. Now, about you."
>Her body sits upright.
"We're different."
>"Well duh."
"So that is why it's hard, for me. But yes. You have traits and features I find attractive."
>"Like what? It's probably cause I've got the records for flight school. Or my super cool tricks at the Wonderbolts show."
>Dash looks smug.
"Actually, no. I can't fly. I'm not a Pegasus, so I can't appreciate how it feels to fly, or what that's like."
>Her smug grin fades.
"Nope, I like you for you. You've got a spunky attitude, you're confident, albeit headstrong almost to a fault. And you never fail."
>"Well, I mean, nopony knows when I do fail..."
>She looks a little sheepish to admit she isn't always the best.
"You haven't failed, to me. Get knocked down 8 times, stand up 9. You don't know what it means to give up."
>Dash brightens up a bit at the compliment.
"I mean, I like Rarity for her sassy elegance as well, on the opposite end of the spectrum. But you two are in different categories. You're more fun to hang with."
>"Yeah, I -am- pretty great..."
"Easy now. I can only stroke your ego once a day, else you might explode."
>"Would you ever... Ya know. Date me?"
>This trips you up, slightly.
"Ho boy. That's another complexity."
>"Is it gonna be some long winded thing about how I'm a pony and you're a human?"
>Dash takes a sip of her cider.
"Well, actually it's cause I'm gay."
>Dash promptly spits out the cider.
>"You're WHAT?"
"Kidding. Wow, that was a good one."
>Dash is not pleased as she now wiped off her muzzle.
"It's sorta that, yeah. I mean, back on Earth it's a weird taboo thing to have any kind of relationship with animals outside of pets."
>"What? So I'm just an animal?!"
"No, not that. Jeez. I've been here for months. You don't think I've spent that time all alone, do you?"
>Dash slowly raises a brow.
>"So you mean..?"
"Eh, not quite. I've had a few mares visit, but nothing really went anywhere. Just didn't 'click' ya know?"
>You shrug.
"But I made good friends with them. How else do you think I learned to cook with my crippling dietary needs?"
>"Oh, yeah. You said something about Golden Harvest one day."
>God damn horses get next to no meat in their diets.
>Three different food shops to get your necessary nutrition.
"But I mean, yeah, I could date you."
>Suddenly, she perks up with a shade of red on her cheeks.
"It's just, we hang out a lot, so it's one of those things where I don't want it to get weird."
>"How could it get weird?"
"I'd rather not get into my history with women and friendships. The short version is not enough separation of chill-out time and ... Well, 'mushy time' let's call it."
>"Could you maybe gimme some details?"
>You groan.
"This one girl in college I dated has these odd friends that merged into my clique and she felt the need to always be near me and call me Senpai."
>"What's that?"
"Don't ask. I got real sick of it because there wasn't a difference between being friends and being involved, and it made it so we never just "went out and had fun." It was "we went on a date".
>You slump back, reaching for your coffee.
"I mean, you're you, so I don't worry too much about that, now that I think about it."
>"What's that supposed to mean?"
>Dash furrows her brow, her tone almost indignant.
"I mean you aren't one to get all lovey-dovey or publicly affectionate. Or go broadcasting about who you're dating on Facebook."
>"What's Facebook?"
"It was a mistake and singularly responsible for the beginning of the downfall of society."
>Dash blinks.
"Never mind, it's not something I need to worry about, here."
>"So is that a yes?"
"It's not a no."
>You tip back your coffee, then set the cup back down.
"Why don't you drop in tomorrow night. Around 7 o'clock."
>"Wait, what? You're just asking me for a date, just like that? How do you even know I would say yes?"
"Why else would you ask me all these questions?"
>Dash just scrunches up and moves to sip her cider.
>You smirk lightly, in spite of her.
"Relax. Just a date, right? Doesn't mean this, right here, chilling out, changes at all."
>"Is that what made things weird?"
"Yeah, it's way better to keep our fun as friends as fun as friends. So if we do get to lovey-dovey stuff, it's the nice, intimate times when we're alone."
>You fold your hands with a smile.
"Like curling up under a nice soft blanket and stroking just along the limb of a wing as the radio plays."
>Dash sputters on her cider.
"Or nestled in close on top of a hill on a warm evening watching the stars."
>"Yeah, cause, I mean, if you're into that kind of... Lovey-dovey stuff."
"Why make it so public and common. Keep it special."
>"So, seven o'clock."
"And bring a towel."
>"What would I need a towel for?"
"I cannot disclose that information. Suffice to say it is required."
>"Alright... Then...?"
>You pull out a few bits to cover your cups of coffee and leave them on the table.
"See ya at my place, Dashie."