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The Story of Princess Averageria [Skype Chat]

By: minion_of_Lulu on Mar 10th, 2013  |  syntax: None  |  size: 8.37 KB  |  hits: 231  |  expires: Never
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  1. [7:25:44 AM] Minion of Lulu: >Babs gives birth.
  2. >Everything goes fine.
  3. >Looks at the child.
  4. >It's an alicorn.
  5. >It's able  to speak as a newborn foal.
  6. >First words are "IMMA PRETTY PRINCESS!!!"
  7. [7:27:49 AM] Nebulus: >Everything burns
  8. >Bad End
  9. [7:33:29 AM] Minion of Lulu: >New story chronicling the events of Babs Seed and Anon's child from day to day activities.
  10. >She's shunned by Ponyville for being an Alicorn.
  11. >She sucks at magic and can't really fly that well, but has the potential to learn.
  12. >She will be mediocre at best.
  13. >basically is an earth pony with lower than average abilities.
  14. [7:34:29 AM] Minion of Lulu: >Anon and Babs helps her through her troubles.
  15. >Develops an Oedipus complex.
  16. [7:34:42 AM] Nebulus: And so the adventures of Princess Averageria begin.
  17. [7:34:49 AM] Minion of Lulu: ^hue
  18. [7:35:18 AM] Minion of Lulu: She represents the average ponies that don't stand out.
  19. [7:35:24 AM] Minion of Lulu: makes a new kingdom
  20. [7:35:34 AM] Minion of Lulu: it's average.
  21. [7:35:40 AM] Nebulus: It goes to war with Equestria
  22. [7:35:47 AM] Nebulus: It's standing army is so unbelievably average
  23. [7:36:05 AM] Nebulus: That the war lasts a fair amount of time a small number of ponies die.
  24. Not that much destruction is caused.
  25. [7:36:09 AM] Nebulus: People aren't too miffed about it.
  26. [7:36:48 AM] Nebulus: The peace treaty is signed
  27. Averageria's signature is barely legible
  28. Celestia is indifferent to the whole situation
  29. [7:36:57 AM] Nebulus: Everyone goes home and the war is forgotten within months.
  30. [7:37:17 AM] Minion of Lulu: There's a single entry about the Average War
  31. [7:37:25 AM] Minion of Lulu: >"It was meh"
  32. [7:37:39 AM] Nebulus: Tourist critics visit the kingdom of Avaria
  33. They give it a 6/10 - "Midly interesting"
  34. [7:38:10 AM] Nebulus: War veteran is interviewed about the war
  35. "I've seen worse"
  36. [7:39:15 AM] Minion of Lulu: Manage to hold the Pony Games there.
  37. The officials wanted a place that was "Average to not take away from the events."
  38.  
  39. Rainbow Dash was heartbroken again knowing Cloudsdale lost
  40. [7:39:43 AM | Edited 7:40:21 AM] The Narrator: Most of the competitors perform fine to middling at best, no medals are won.
  41. [7:40:08 AM | Edited 7:40:11 AM] The Narrator: Princess Averegia is satisfied with the overall performance of her subjects.
  42. [7:40:42 AM] Nebulus: The opening ceremony is nice.
  43. [7:40:54 AM] The Narrator: Nothing too special or garish.
  44. [7:41:10 AM] Nebulus: Just enough to leave an impression, but nothing to fawn over.
  45. [7:41:22 AM] The Narrator: Kind of like the london olympics..
  46. [7:41:25 AM] The Narrator: Dohoho
  47. [7:41:59 AM] Minion of Lulu: All of the Princesses watch over the events in an average sky box.
  48. [7:42:33 AM] The Narrator: The placement of the skybox isn't ideal, in fact, it's average at best.
  49. [7:42:44 AM] Nebulus: The seats are comfy enough
  50. [7:42:59 AM] The Narrator: >"What is semantic satiation of the word average Mr. Trebek?"
  51. [7:43:02 AM] Nebulus: Tickets to the event are sold at a moderate price
  52. [7:43:18 AM] The Narrator: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIYhwmgiLYs
  53. Canada eh?
  54. [7:45:07 AM] Minion of Lulu: hue
  55. [7:45:59 AM] The Narrator: >tfw I actually think this would be a good idea
  56. Except without the car driving away
  57. [7:47:56 AM] Minion of Lulu: Anon and Babs become the honorary average king and queen.
  58. Visits from time to time.
  59. Anon is also a part of the average harem.
  60. Only Averageria and Babs have access to this.
  61. He's picked a lot in family fun time.
  62. The only thing that's slightly above average.
  63. And Princess Averageria has the same kinks as her mother.
  64. Its an average anal party.
  65. [7:48:58 AM] Nebulus: She's fairly tight. But not as tight as her mother.
  66. Which is strange, given that you were elbow deep in Babs 4 days ago.
  67. [7:49:01 AM] The Narrator: Averageria tries pegging Anon.
  68. He is reported to have described the experience as satisfying, but disappointingly average.
  69. [7:49:49 AM] Nebulus: Babs smiles when the event is brought up, and describes it as "A decent time"
  70. [7:50:54 AM] The Narrator: If this is written, I'm pretty sure that almost everyone will think it an average story.
  71. Not a bad read, but nothing that makes it special, just your average fanfic.
  72. [7:51:26 AM] Nebulus: About 3 or 4 replies.
  73. About half of them give it a 5 or 6 out of 10
  74. [7:51:48 AM] Minion of Lulu: Exactly what I was going for.
  75. [7:51:52 AM] Minion of Lulu: THE END!
  76.  
  77. [8:17:21 AM] The Narrator: The only thing Princess averageria is remembered for is giving birth to her daughter: Perfectia, who can do no wrong.
  78. This, however, is offset by her twin sister, who can't get anything right.
  79. Thus as the twin heirs and future co-rulers, the kingdom will remain average at best
  80. >Crime rates are lower than ever because of Perfectia
  81. >Fuckupia introduces immigration
  82. >Zebras infest the streets and start causing crime
  83. >The stellar police work and top notch education system is balanced out by roaming gangs of zebras
  84. [8:20:42 AM] Minion of Lulu: i'm loving this too much
  85. [8:21:18 AM] The Narrator: >Perfectia discovers the cure to every known disease.
  86. >Fuckupia opens Pandora's Box
  87. [8:21:28 AM] Minion of Lulu: >again
  88. [8:21:35 AM] The Narrator: >Hundreds of new diseases re released
  89. [8:22:25 AM] Nebulus: >Perfectia creates a modern art masterpiece
  90. >Fuckupia spills Ragu all over it
  91. [8:22:39 AM] The Narrator: >It's considered an average art piece.
  92. [8:25:15 AM] Minion of Lulu: >Perfectia gets fed up with Fuckupia's antics.
  93. >Turns into OCD Princess.
  94. >Begins to undo everything her sister has done.
  95. >creates the perfect kingdom
  96. >But sees the rest of Equestria isn't as perfect.
  97. >Goes off to change things.
  98. >Takes over and rules with an iron fist.
  99. >Anything deemed not fit by her standards is brainwashed.
  100. [8:26:12 AM] Minion of Lulu: "YOU SHALL CONFORM TO MY PERFECT UTOPIA!"
  101. [8:26:45 AM] The Narrator: >Fuckupia inadvertently messes up everything in the perfect kingdom while Perfectia is gone.
  102. >Perfectia has a blood vessel burst in her brain at the sight of her perfection ruined.
  103. [8:27:28 AM] Nebulus: >While she's gone, Fuckupia cleans up her messes, turning the perfect towns into hellholes after her sister is gone
  104. >Literal hellholes
  105. >4 hours after her arrival in Manehattan, the skies rain blood and demons ravage ponies in the streets as the entire city burns
  106.  
  107. >Meanwhile in the next town over, gleaming white buildings pierce the skies, and ponies march quietly down the street as Perfectia watches over them, monitoring everything.
  108. >Fuckupia arrives
  109. >Knocks over a plant pot with her large, plushy, fuckable ass.
  110. >Total Anarchy.
  111. [8:28:13 AM] Minion of Lulu: >A huge war breaks out.
  112. [8:28:27 AM] Minion of Lulu: >Kingdoms Choose sides
  113. [8:31:26 AM] Nebulus: >The two sisters face off
  114. >In the final battle, Fuckupia manages to stain Perfectia's gleaming white coat with spaghetti sauce
  115. >Perfectia implodes
  116. >The day seems won
  117. >Fuckupia turns back to the onlookers and smiles weakly
  118. >"W-we won!"
  119. >She then stumbles, and the onlookers notice that she smells of really nice roses
  120. >She was hit with soap
  121. >Her dying words aren't heard because she didn't say them loudly enough
  122. >She implodes, and no one ever knows what her last wish was
  123. >Lived a fuck up, died a fuck up.
  124.  
  125. >A statue is erected in her honor
  126. >It was made of the wrong material, and melts in the rain.
  127.  
  128. >And so, in the end, neither side actually won.
  129. >Everyone goes home and they realize the beauty of it all
  130. [8:31:37 AM] Nebulus: >No one won.
  131. >It was a neutral victory.
  132. [8:31:44 AM] Nebulus: >Averageria planned it the whole time.
  133. [8:31:55 AM] Nebulus: >She nods and fades away, her mission done.
  134.  
  135. [8:32:24 AM] The Narrator: Alt ending where the princesses don't die:
  136. >Anon, grandfather to the twins, has developed a thing for fucking his family.
  137. >He gets them together for a threesome.
  138. >Perfectia is the best lay he has ever had.
  139. >But Fuckupia's inexperience and horrible fetishes make it one of the most average threesomes he has ever had.
  140.  
  141. [8:08:40 AM] Minion of Lulu: heh
  142. [8:10:45 AM] Minion of Lulu: I can see that in my head.
  143. >All the princesses holding up 10s with excitement.
  144. >Princess Averageria holds up a five with indifference.
  145. [8:11:02 AM] Minion of Lulu: >she's a Russian judge
  146. [8:11:35 AM] Nebulus: "Look at all these events that don't impress me"
  147. [8:11:44 AM] Nebulus: Ok
  148. [8:11:48 AM] Nebulus: She now has a Russian accent
  149. [8:11:50 AM] Nebulus: This is amazing.
  150. [8:12:05 AM | Edited 8:12:30 AM] The Narrator: "It was good kick, but indifference make it so I give no more then 5"
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