- {Note: I'll start green texting right away, since *someone* told me it wasn't right. I liked being on the left side.}
- 2
- >[Fast Forwarding Memory]
- >Nah, just fucking with you.
- *
- >You arrive at Pinkie’s with Applejack on time.
- >You actually planned to arrive much later, but Applejack convinced you otherwise.
- >And when you mean ‘convince’,
- >You mean lassos.
- >Who could have known a pony could throw a lasso without hands?
- >Perhaps living near the one of the most upright citizen of Ponyville won’t help with your shenanigans.
- >You should have moved in with Pinkie or some sort.
- >She seems like the playful and random sort.
- >The party is held in Pinkie’s store, Sugarcube Corner.
- >Apparently, parties are a thing of a common occurrence here.
- >Back on Earth, being the forever alone troll you are, you never really joined parties.
- >Anywho, this party was different.
- >Different in multiple levels.
- >For one, human parties weren’t held in a store that gave you Diabetes just by staring at it.
- >The party was slowly climbing with excitement by the time you entered, due to the ‘meet the weird ape-creature’ thing.
- >Every pony cheered on your entry.
- >You simply smiled and waved the bunch off.
- >It was like having a birthday song sung to you.
- >How are you supposed react?
- >You take a corner seat, holding whatever food you can hold.
- >You forgot you have a sweet tooth.
- >Looking at the cupcake you are holding stirs a primordial feeling in you.
- >Something ancient and-
- >Fuck that, you’re hungry.
- >“HEY!” Pinkie comes into your field of view, somehow hanging from the left.
- >You take a bite, and wave at her.
- >“How do you like the party, Anon?” She asks, full with expectations.
- >“It’s alright.” You take another bite.
- >“Just that?” Pinkie cocks her head ever so slightly, pouting at you.
- >You sigh.
- >She did treat you with a party.
- >You suppose you can let her have some fun.
- >Your right eye twitches.
- >“ohmygodpinkiethisistotallyawesomehowdidyoudoit?”
- >“thanksanoniworkedreallyhardonit”
- >You excitedly clench your fists and bring it up, quaking with joy.
- >You run off with Pinkie around the room, trying out party games she provided.
- >You first try ‘pin-the-tail-on-the-pony’.
- >Very familiar, but you still suck.
- >You ended up repeatedly stabbing the drawn pony’s eye with the pin, mentally scarring some fillies.
- >Your night was going great, until someone brought out the boom box and the cider.
- >There is a knock on the door.
- >You groan, facing away the sunlight that is burning you face.
- >You were never much of a drinker.
- >Applejack made you take a swig, and Rainbow just jumped in.
- >That bitch.
- >You lean over, past Pinkie, and hit the sleeping blue pegasus.
- >“I hate you.” You mumble in your hungover state.
- >You slump over Pinkie, who simply shifts in her sleep.
- >You groan one more time, and lift yourself up.
- >There is still a pony waiting by the door.
- >“Anon?” The voice calls over the door.
- >“Just a minute!” You call out, looking around.
- >Last night was a big night.
- >Well, sort of.
- >Five ponies are scattered across your room, all asleep.
- >One of them is on your bed.
- >You slept on the floor.
- >In your own house.
- >They will pay for this.
- >You stealthily tip toe over the bodies, to make it to the first floor.
- >You notice even more ponies sprawled.
- >What the hell happened last night?
- >You finally answer the door.
- >It’s Twilight.
- >“Morning Anon I got this- Woah!” Twilight looks over the incapacitated ponies.
- >“Long story, you say, rubbing the back of your head.”
- >Twilight regains her composure.
- >“Anyway, I got an urgent message from Princess Celestia just a few minutes ago.”
- >Oh boy.
- >“She needs the two of us right over to Canterlot.”
- >“Wait.” You mutter again.
- >You’re not quite over the alcohol.
- >“How does this concern me?” You ask, leaning on the door.
- >“No idea.”
- >“Okay, let me get myself ready.”
- >“Meet you back in my library, in an hour.
- >“Aye-aye, captain.” You give a drunken salute and close the door.
- >You head into the bathroom, conjure yourself new clothes, and a large towel.
- >You groan one last time.
- >Once the shower is done, you look at yourself one more time.
- >Hair? Check.
- >Face? Check.
- >Clothes? Check-mate.
- >You slump your man-purse over your shoulder, and start running to Twilight’s.
- >Twilight is already outside, waiting for you eagerly.
- >“There you are, Anon!” She says moving already.
- >“Yeah, I’m all set. I even got my man-purse.”
- >“Your ‘mappers’?” She asks, turning.
- >Pokerface.jpg
- >“No, my man-purse. You know- a purse for men?”
- >“Humans are weird.” Twilight shrugs and turns smiling.
- >You look over your man-purse.
- >It is simple, just an olive green bag with the line to go over your shoulder, hanging by your side.
- >You just like to call it a man-purse.
- >It serves you like one.
- >Oh god, you’re going gay already.
- >Soon, you find yourself facing the same chariot that brought you here.
- >Except the fact that there was an extra pair of guards pulling it.
- >You and Twilight jump in as soon as possible.
- >“Better hold on, Twilight. This might be fast.” You whisper to your pony companion.
- >“You and I both, Anon.” Twilight readies herself.
- >Before you could process that figure of speech, you’re lifted to air.
- >The wind goes much faster than before, tearing your face up.
- >No really- you are on the verge of crying due to the wind on your eyes.
- >Suddenly all that thick windows on planes make sense now.
- >You go back to your fetal position you were in when you arrived at Ponyville.
- >You cross your arms.
- >“God fucking dammit.”
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