- 6
- >Soon, you decide lying about won’t solve all of your problems and you move on.
- >You join Celestia and SA in the throne room, packed to the brim with royal and loyal guards.
- >”Ah, Anonymous. Glad to have you here.” Celestia motions you over.
- >You shudder at the notion.
- >You stand next to the captain, looking over the guards.
- >”Anonymous, as the ruler of Equestria, I hereby promote you as the new captain of the guard.”
- >Both SA and you look over each other in surprise.
- >You shrugs, and give an innocent smile.
- >”What the buck, Anon?” SA whispers to you.
- >”Hey, sleeping with royalty has its benefits.” You chuckle lightly, as SA shudders at your words.
- >”And Shining Armor, You shall become the general of the Equestrian army.”
- >”What’s that, Captain?” SA gives you a mocking smile.
- >”Fine you win.” You smile, tapping the newly-made general’s shoulder.
- >”Anonymous, your first assignment as the new captain is to bring the elements of harmony, in Ponyville.” Celestia continues to order.
- >No sweat, just a quick visit and say hi to everyone.
- >”Got it, princess.” You nod.
- >You stand.
- >”And I promise I will not return until I have done so!”
- >You let out a war cry and run through the room, kicking the double doors open and onto the Canterlot.
- >All ponies in the room are stunned.
- >”It- it must be a human thing.” Shining Armor says.
- >They all laugh.
- >You tap your foot impatiently, waiting for the train.
- >Maybe you should have waited; Celestia might have given you a ride.
- >A ‘ride’.
- >Good heavens.
- >Your train ride itself is boring, nothing special there.
- >You just fell asleep few times and talked to some ponies.
- >Such nice people.
- >You mean animals.
- >Animal-people?
- >You arrival in Ponyville was… subtle at best.
- >Still in your ‘royal attire’- which was your suit.
- >You walk over the platform, looking over your previous home.
- >Wait, why did you leave again?
- >Oh shit.
- >Two hooves tackle your back, bringing you to the ground.
- >”Ah thought it was you, Anon.” That southern accent.
- >”Applejack-“
- >”Anon!” A filly with red mane runs to your downed face.
- >She gives it a warm hug.
- >So, situation check.
- >You’re on your stomach on the ground, one mad (and buff) pony pinning you down.
- >And her tiny sister is hugging you in the face.
- >You would say this isn’t very normal.
- >But hey, maybe assault-love is common in Equestria.
- >”Applejack, get off Anon!” You feel a magical aura, and the pressure in you back is gone.
- >”Thanks, Twi.” You stand, still having Applebloom on your face.
- >You grab the little filly, and throw her up, quickly catching her again.
- >”Missed me?” You ask.
- >”Of course! You’re the best brother ever!” The filly wiggles about in your clasp.
- >Everyone else ‘awwww’s.
- >Applejack is still glaring at you, ready to pounce again.
- >”So AJ, did you tell anypo-“
- >”Nope.”
- >”Great.”
- >You set Applebloom down, and face the mane six.
- >That was easy.
- >”Twilight, we need to get the elements of harmony together.” You say.
- >”Already done, Anon. I got the letter few hours ago.”
- >You shrug.
- >Why did Celestia send you here-
- >”Apparently, you were supposed to use the royal carriage to get here, but you insisted on the train.”
- >You give nervous laugh and scratch the back of your head.
- >”Well, now what?” You ask.
- >”We’re supposed to rendezvous with my brother in the Everfree forest.”
- >Oh, that makes sense.
- >”What’s going on, Anon?”
- >You sigh.
- >You start pacing.
- >”You see, there was an- uprising.”
- >”What?” The six yell in unison.
- >”It’s by Luna. We need to stop her.”
- >”Oh my.” Rarity comments.
- >”WAIT” You all turn to Applebloom.
- >”Does this mean Anon has to go again?”
- >Goddamn cute filly you.
- >”Yep.” You try to make it sound okay.
- >”Awww, have a heart, Anon.”
- >”I do, Applebloom, why do you think I’m alive?”
- >She is blank.
- >”You know, blood circulation and- forget it.”
- >You turn to the elements of harmony.
- >”You guys get ready, I’ll get Applebloom home.”
- >”I’ll alert the mayor, Anon.” Twilight salutes you.
- >”Copy that, good-buddy.” You wave everyone good bye.
- >”Anon, why are you always in trouble?” Applebloom asks, still clinging on your neck.
- >She loved to sit on your shoulders.
- >”I guess I have a knack for it.”
- >Silence.
- >”Maybe, it’s my special talent.”
- >You can practically hear her eye widening.
- >”No, Applebloom.”
- >”Aw.”
- >You soon see the apple orchard again.
- >Hell, you’re going to be back soon enough.
- >But what is with this feel?
- >You set down your surrogate sister.
- >You run your hand through her soft mane.
- >She turns to you, with the deepest glaze in her eyes.
- >”Anon, you gotta promise.”
- >”Promise what?”
- >”Promise you’ll be back.”
- >”Come on, you don’t think-“
- >”Promise!”
- >”Fine, I promise- cross my heart, and hope to die.”
- >”What?”
- >”Just a human saying.”
- >”Oh wait, Ah-non. You don’t have a heart.”
- >The two of you share a laugh.
- >You ruffle her mane once again.
- >”Okay, kiddo, I’m going. See you in- a month?”
- >”You got a promise, Anon.”
- >You share a bro-hoof.
- >Your path to the rendezvous seems heavier now, now that you promised.
- >The six ponies with you don’t seem too excited either.
- >In a distance, you can see SA and his company, right on the outskirts of Everfree.
- >”Ah, Anon. Glad to see you again- after your little performance.” SA lets out a small chuckle.
- >”Oh, shut up, Shiny.” You playfully bump his shoulder plate.
- >”So, where’s our army?” You ask.
- >”Right in the fields of Everfree. Looks like Luna took the old abandoned castle in the depths of the forest.” SA replies.
- >”Well, then we’re wasting time.”
- >With that, the eight of you, excluding twenty guardsmen, make your way into the forest.
- >After few hours of walking, you come across the wide fields of Everfree.
- >”Say, Shiny.” You whisper.
- >”Yes, Anon?”
- >”Isn’t the fields a little bit too close to Ponyville?”
- >”Sadly, yes. But we don’t intend on bringing the battle there. Hopefully.”
- >”Hopefully.” You echo the unicorn.
- >”Besides, we can get supplies from there.”
- >You can argue with that.
- >The sight is truly something.
- >Over the hills you stand on, there are at least few dozen of tents, each housing few guardsmen.
- >Further than that, you can spot another hill and a large tent over it.
- >”That’s where Celestia is, Anon.” SA points.
- >”Oh man.” You mutter.
- >”You’re not glad?”
- >”No, I have to walk more.”
- >Walking.
- >More walking.
- >We’re talking about a shitload of-
- >Oh look, you’re here.
- >The eight of you enter the tent, to be greeted by Celestia.
- >The tent is an octagon is shape, a writing table on one side, few cushions on another, and a large map-table in the center.
- >A simple hearth is in the corner.
- >”Ah, my student Twilight.” Celestia goes to embrace her student.
- >”Good to see you five as well.” Celestia looks over the mares.
- >Her smile dissipates.
- >”I’m sure Anon filled you in the details, we’re at a brink of a civil war.”
- >”A c-civil w-w-war?” Fluttershy hides on the map-table.
- >”Sadly, yes. My sister Luna decided to attempt a coup. As hard as it maybe, we must stop her.”
- >You step forward.
- >”Maybe we could end this in peaceful terms?” You ask.
- >”I am trying, Anon, but she is constantly sending attacks, and our negotiation attempts have been futile for the moment.”
- >Dang.
- >”That doesn’t mean we’re not stopping through.” Celestia continues.
- >”What do you need, princess?” Twilight asks.
- >”I need the elements of harmony to help our forces, as well as extra help in the army.”
- >The six mares stand upright, saluting to the princess.
- >”You got it, princess.” Twilight replies.
- >”Come on girls, let’s do this.”
- >They stepped out, and broke into song.
- >Oh boy.
- >Montage!
- >Jesus dingbat monkey Christ.
- >SA leaves to join in the songs, while you wanted to escape.
- >“Later, Anon.” SA leaves first.
- >”Yeah, see you real soon.” You wave him off.
- >As you leave, you feel a light tug on your back.
- >Oh shit its Molestia.
- >”Anon~ I get so lonely and all, will you join me?”
- >You feel your body slowly being dragged towards the princess.
- >Your molested screams are cloaked by the night and the singing of the ponies.
- >Goddamn ponies.
Don't like ads? PRO users don't see any ads ;-)
Text below is selected. Please press Ctrl+C to copy to your clipboard. (⌘+C on Mac)
create a new version of this paste
RAW Paste Data