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the chair

By: kingcheeselegs on Jun 29th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 1.88 KB  |  hits: 19  |  expires: Never
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  1. >buy a new chair
  2. >throw old one out into garden
  3. >your daughter complains to you that she wants a fluffy pony
  4. >not going to buy one because you spent your money on the chair
  5. >you get an idea
  6. >cover entire chair in double sided tape
  7. >put a plate of spaghetti on it
  8. >night time comes
  9. >group of fluffy ponies enters your garden
  10. >there's about six of them
  11. >a green pegasus finds the spaghettie
  12. >"smawty fwiend gets nummies fiwst"
  13. >he jumps onto the chair
  14. >within seconds the fluffy is completely stuck
  15. >"fwuffy stuck hewp hewp"
  16. >another pegasus tries to help
  17. >gets stuck
  18. >"hewp hewp chair nasty"
  19. >a unicorn tries to pull them off
  20. >why do they even bother
  21. >"owie owie chai huwt fwuffy"
  22. >within minuets all the fluffys are stuck to the chair
  23. >you remember your daughters favourite colour is red
  24. >there's only a pink one
  25. >it will fucking do
  26. >walk into garden up to chair
  27. >"mister hewp us""gif us nummies""Fwuffy cowd let inside"
  28. >nope
  29. >grab pink fluffy by arms and legs and rip it from tape
  30. >fluff grows back right?
  31. >pink fluffy is crying
  32. >"owwie, why huwt fwuffy,"
  33. >you dump it in a bird cage
  34. >"noo dont weve me here"
  35. >go back to chair
  36. >rip the two pegasi off
  37. >walk back to house
  38. >"gif nummies"
  39. >feeling in a good mood
  40. >you mix some nail tacks with some spaghetti and put it in a bowl
  41. >the two start to eat
  42. >"owwie bad nummies huwt"
  43. >"I gave you some food why are you complaining"
  44. >you can clearly see nails sticking out of the two ponies mouth
  45. >"fwuffies want good nummies, these nummies bad"
  46. >this makes you angry at them
  47. >you grab one of the fluffies and nail its wing to a board of wood
  48. >owie munsta huwt fwuffie owie
  49. >nail other fluffy to the board
  50. >take board outside to the other 3 ponys
  51. >stick board in the back of the chair
  52. >all five die day 6 days later
  53. >daughter happy with her new fluffy
  54. >2 weeks later it falls down stairs and breaks its neck
  55. >it was all worth it
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