Anon and Femanon in Equestria (Chapter Two)

 

>"Step away from the Human."

"... Celestia."

>This is Celestia. You know this creature speaking to you right now.

>"Anon... do not make me do something I would regret."

"Why? It didn't stop you when you left my world, did it?"

>And there it is. A thousand plus years of history between these two summed up in one line. Everything you've ever wanted to say about that day is now out in the open. See, nobody knows exactly why you are who you are.

>A thousand years ago, she abandoned your world and took Luna with her. She used to be the deity of kinship and kindhearted souls, while Luna respectfully led as the deity of honor and loyalty. Nobody knows why she left, but when she did, she took a bloody number of people with her.

>Turns out an unstable portal to another plane of existence can kill a lot of people, and it's something not every deity can do, let alone do right. The price they payed to create a new world in their image was the thousands of souls they killed on their way over.

>When she left, another actual deity (the God of Order to be specific) went out in search of her in hopes to bring her back so that she might restore order and possibly bring back the souls of everyone that died. It would be her one and only chance at redemption. Haven't seen him since.

>And so, the other Gods convened. What else would they do? Other than dictate the lives of their followers.

>They're just mad because you, and only you, can talk to your Employer.

>The Employer realizes that he needs all these deities back to maintain order in his realm.

>And so he sends You. You, the one with the biggest grudge to hold against the Alicorn right in front of you.

>The road to this day was paved with the blood of HER followers. And she knows it.

 

>Celestia pauses. She's unsure of what to do. Raising a hoof in a brief moment of guilt, and every royal guard sees it.

>"My lady? What's he talking about?" one royal guard would ask.

>She's silent. It's just her and you now.

>"If you'll give up whatever it is you're here for and go home now, I'll tell you everything you want to know."

"Done."

>You don't even have to think about it. You've had a thousand years to think about it.

"Anon!"

>Femanon storms up to you, whispering exasperatedly in your ear.

>"We can't just go home?! We risked enough even coming here, going home empty handed would be a complete waste!"

>She's right. There's just something sexy about her when she's right.

"You're right. It's not going to mean a thing if we don't bring all the parties involved back. Celestia... did you know...

>Celestia doesn't want to hear whatever you have to say. Enough with the guilt trip already sheesh.

"The other Gods back home had already convened... they said, and I do mean they, not me, that honestly? They couldn't care less if you came back or not."

>You are now pacing back and forth, watching her as you go.

"They said they might even forgive you if just stay away for good."

>You said that with a smile.

"I know you're probably expecting me to be really sore about this whole thing but Celestia I have to admit, I actually just don't care anymore. I have a new job, a new life, and the less involved I get with you the better. So. If I could just bring back our God of Order I'll just... be on my way."

>"I'll have the guards escort you to my quarters. Luna and I will be waiting."

"Wonderful, I cannot wait to see her."

>Again with the smile.

>Celestia exits, Shining Armor following close behind with the rest of his royal guard. They leave a guardp0ny posted out front.

>"Anon, what are you up to?"

>You look at your bodyguard.

"Something's not right."

>And that was all you had to say, really. Femanon knows when you're like this. You don't have any evidence, but when Anon knows something's up, something's up. It's an acquired skill.

 

"What remains of our friend in that cell?"

>Femanon shrugs.

"Well go check! I was definitely implying you to check!"

>Femanon shrugs again, making the same "sorry bro" face as before.

"You're hopeless."

>You decide to go look for yourself since your lackey is being a lazy-good-for-nothing.

"Old man!"

>You call into the cell as you enter before shedding some light with your awesome glowstick.

>He's not moving. Just wait a second, he might be asleep. Because he's old.

>Still not moving.

>You sigh and make a conclusion. But it's an uneducated one without any evidence, which forces you to check his vitals using your state-of-the-art medical knowledge and surgeon-like precision. You prod the body with the end of your staff several times.

"Oh yeah he's dead. Yup. That is a dead body. Femanon, I'm not cleaning this up."

>"Well you have to do something, you handled him last."

"I beg your pardon? He came to ME. And he was here first. Castle's responsibility."

>"You can't just blame everything on the castle, Anon."

"Yes I can. Castle's fault. See? I just did it."

>"JUST DO SOMETHING FUCK'S SAKE"

"ALRIGHT I WILL CALM DOWN."

>You kneel at the old man's side and remove a large purple quartz crystal from your satchel of useful stuff. You feel responsible for his death somehow, given that you were the last human being to interact with him. At least it was a human, so there's that. To be around your own kind in your final hours in an alien world doesn't sound so bad, if you have to die.

>But who was he? That question keeps getting brought to the front of your mind. You already know you aren't the first human to visit Equestria.

>And, furthermore, you continue to mentally examine that image of the blonde-haired guy that old man burned into your brain earlier. You guess the old guy must have been well-trained at some point to do anything telepathic.

>A priest, perhaps? Priests were known to do that stuff back home. Burn images into their followers' brains to make them susceptible to control, but that sort of practice is usually reserved for god-hunting cults. Yes, they are a cult that hunt the Gods. More on that later.

>Point is, if this guy was related to them in any way, that means he was here on a mission. Probably the same mission as you. But you can't be sure yet, not until Celestia tells you everything.

>"Anon, are you going to do anything or what? Hurry it up."

>You shake it off and put the quartz closer to the old man's body. The closer it gets, a light inside begins burning brighter.

"Go back to where you came, old soul. Far, far away from here. Just follow this light."

>You lay the brightly-glowing quartz by his side and stand, dusting yourself off.

>Neither you nor Femanon say anything until you make your way out of the dungeon, up the stairs and back into the main hall leading to the throne and, subsequently, the princesses' quarters.

 

 

>"So.. who do you think he was?"

>You think for a moment on how best to answer that to your apprentice. The two of you are being escorted by a single royal guard to Celestia's private quarters in her throne room. Which is unfortunately long enough of a stroll to have to answer that question.

"Hard to say. He didn't have anything on him to be identified. Excuse me guard, what can you tell me about that man in the cell?"

>"I'm just as confused as you are, newcomer." The p0ny guard sounds staunch, as if he doesn't have anything to say to the likes of you. But he has to be honest, things have been acting strange at the castle lately. This stranger's appearance is no coincidence.

"I would think that Celestia might at least keep her guards better informed on the going-ons of her Em-"

>Femanon cuts you short with a jab to the ribs.

>No reply from the guard. Whether it's because he's convicted by your word or he just doesn't care isn't your place to say. Just in time to halt the walk, where the two humans find themselves in front of some gold-trimmed oak doors. Distinguished golden designs consisting of stars, swirls and other ornamental patterns concludes this is Celestia's quarters.

"Always did think a bit highly of herself."

>Luckily the guard didn't catch your awkward muttering.

>"You find yourselves at the personal chambers of the princesses Celestia of the Sun and Luna of the Moon. We expect your best behavior during this private meeting, and wish that you relinquish any and all weapons upon entering." the guard isn't playing around, he wants your gear.

>Femanon is hesitant to hand over her trusty broadsword and buckler.

"Just do it."

>The confidence in your voice is enough to convince her. It's a good thing Femanon trusts you so well, although with some of the situations you find yourself in, she oftentimes forgets why.

>After handing over anything that could be used as a force of lethal action against an Alicorn princess, the two lone humans in Equestria enter the private chambers of its rulers.

>The room itself is grand, containing several doors that likely branch out into sub-quarters and guest-quarters. The foundation as a whole is rather square, but it's simple and it works. Garnished with all the opulent jewels and trinkets here and there, and it doesn't look half bad. Clearly a work worthy of royalty. A large fireplace lay on the other side of the room adjacent to them.

>It is by that fireplace that Celestia and her sister Luna stand respectively.

>You finally remember that letter you had written by your Employer.

"Before you say anything, I just thought you might want to read this."

>You retrieve a simple white envelope from within one of the many pockets filled on the inside of your robes. It's been held snug to your chest since it was written. Celestia coats the envelope in a golden aura and whisks it from your grip. You put your hands in your pockets by your waist.

"Good to see you too, Luna."

>Luna nods, her gaze fixed on the letter. Not much of a talker, that one. Or maybe she just never had much to say to you. You're not sure.

>Celestia's expression remains unchanged. But she's always held a sense of solemn guilt, held only to herself. Something about her eyes when they met yours in the dungeon seemed to speak a lot. I mean, it has been like a thousand years. Something tells you she's had just as much time as you did to think about this. Maybe you shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

>"You won't find what you're looking for, Anon. Not here."

>Celestia folds the envelope up and it magically flutters its way back into your chest pocket.

"Not surprised. I'm more interested about that Human, back there, though. Celestia why did you have a very old man left in the back of one of your dungeons?"

>"Certainly you didn't come all this way just to ask me that."

"No, I didn't. But now I am. I need your answers more than you probably think I do. I'm sure I'm not the only one who knows something's not right here. I can offer an astute assumption of the matter, with the right info..."

>Anon's astute assumption-theory has made him nearly infamous amongst the other deities. If given only a few details, you have the ability to predict an incredibly accurate outcome.

>Femanon remains quiet, engaged in how all of this will play out.

>"Anon, you must know how this is affecting Equestria. In the past year, we have reported a great many strange and disturbing occurrences. Your presence here isn't helping that. I sense great unrest and anxiety in my land."

"I'm the least of your worries. Tell me the old man's name."

>Celestia sighs. "Barthomy Estalle Purelitch. High priest of the immortal six-hundred."

>You blink. Wow. You didn't expect to be that spot on.

>Femanon cannot contain her questions any longer.

>"Who are the immortal six-hundred?"

>"They are a cult of no more than six-hundred, and each and every one of them has a personal vendetta against the deities of your world."

"Don't exclude yourself from their reach, Deity."

>Celestia narrows your eyes at you while you finish her answer.

"They're a very exclusive, very methodical organization. They've been around as long as I can remember and pass their heritage through family and other close ties. And not only are they each incredibly dangerous, they are also very persistent. Spies, agents, assassins, at least one person from every profession in the known world can hate a deity if pushed hard enough. I'm guessing Barthomy tracked you down himself. You made a lot of enemies a thousand years ago, and he likely showed up on account of vengeance that was generations old. His hate for you was practically family tradition, I bet."

>Femanon cuts in.

>"Either way, he was here. What kind of strange things have been happening as of late, Princess?"

>It's Luna's turn. She's likely had the most experience, since each anomaly that occurred happened during the night.

>"The everfree forest itself is going out of control. Its borders are thick with wild monsters and dangerous creatures. They're getting braver, venturing farther outside the border and into local towns like Ponyville. Strange markings are on some of the trees there. Our local forest shaman says there's something very powerful at work deeper within the forest. We've even seen several other humans, but... they were each dead before my sister and I could reach them."

"Anything else?"

>You fold your arms. So you were right. Something big is going on here.

"I suppose I should also tell you Barthomy burned an image into my brain. An old priest trick. Tell me, how did Barthomy find you?"

>"We found him." Celestia says somberly. "He was clawing at the trees in the everfree forest, trying to "unbury the lost ones." He was quite mad. Any attempt to communicate with him was useless. He just kept saying the same mantra over and over, "We have to unbury the lost ones." When we assessed that he was no longer a threat, we kept him in the dungeon. During the castle's period of strengthened security, we couldn't spread our guards too thin. That explains why he was left unguarded."

"Poor Barthomy. Spent his last years in madness."

>Femanon cuts in.

>"But what would drive him mad?"

 

 

>Reaching a conclusion has always been your priority. You want to get to the bottom of this. We already know Barthomy is a prominent priest of a cult of "immortal god-killers", but we want to know why he was here, and moreover how? What were his motives?

>You groan, removing your glasses and massaging the bridge of your nose. Anything to cool your mind from the barrage of self-posed queries. You examine your glasses for a moment; such a special thing. You made it yourself. It was your first big mystical enchanted item, after ascending to herald-of-the-gods-status.

>They aren't anything special when looked at from a distance. Just a sleek, efficient, streamlined pair of sharp business-y frames on rail-thin glass, thick grey bevels made of silver line the borders of the black ivory frames. Very sharp. But there's also an inscription on the silver bevels, when you look closer... ah, yes, you remember now. "Let no man belong to another man, that cannot belong to -"

>"Anon!"

>Femanon's bratty inflection snaps you back into state. Yes. That's right. Equestria. Celestia. Luna. Pony empire. You're the ambassador of your world. And you have a dead cult priest on your hands from your world to explain to these goddess sisters.

"I... have no idea."

>You (along with everyone else) groan and sigh exasperatedly. That is, before Celestia cuts in hurriedly.

>"The less that you know, Anon, the better. I urge you, again, if you would just please be on your way.."

>She said that last part awfully nervous-like... before you can interject she continues

>"Your presence here has already caused enough, ahem, damage to the community. They question what new, strange and curious creatures lay beyond the realms of their own homes. And that is very dangerous for them."

>She accented very dangerous with a glare. But not an evil one, no, not a bad intention could be seen in her eyes. It was a protective glare, one that a lioness would give to any stranger trying to harm her cubs

 

>You know, at first, you really hated her. She's the reason that you are where you are, yes, but her intentions have always been good. However, her good intentions backfired and singlehandedly wiped out half the populace of your home world and left the place itself a barren wreck for everybody else to clean up while she went off to play magical horses in fairy tale land. This is serious.

>But now, really, you just pity her. You empathize with her good intentions and understand why she would do what she has to. Perhaps her own world is what she really needs. A world where she can regulate the lives of her subjects peacefully. And that world is being threatened right now. So not only do you feel like you have to get to the bottom of this whole mess, but now you feel just a tiny fraction of a bit responsible for the outcome of this whole mess. You hate that. You resent that. But you know it's the right thing to do. God damn the right thing to do.

"Listen. Just level with me here, okay?"

>This is it, your all or nothing speech. This is going to decide whether you stay here and solve the big mystery, or if you get back in your space-time-warping-log-cabin and go home empty handed. Either option really just sounds shitty, so... you decide to pick the lesser of two evils.

"I'll be honest. I think it's in your best interest if I stay. I cannot leave here empty handed, Celestia."

>"Anon, I canno-" but you cut that white-winged magical horse right the fuck off.

"IF I GO, then my world dies with me."

>She pauses, blinks, blinks again then furrows her brow quizzically.

>"Anon, I don't understand..."

"What did you read in the letter, Celestia?"

>The letter. That's right. What DID she read? She pauses again. Guilt is written all over her face as she just looks at the ground in a mix of shame and anger.

"Are you ashamed, because you would sooner condemn my whole race, or what remains of it, to total extinction before letting yours die?"

 

>"I don't think I should have to answer that right now, I suppose." She's still staring at the ground, crown hung in shame.

"You know earlier I might have berated you. But I honestly understand why, Celestia. That letter is written directly from my Employer, explaining that I have one year's time to find what I'm looking for, or else everything changes. They will start with a clean slate, Celestia. In a heart beat."

>Your voice is calculating and wise, but steadily conveys urgency and a convincing tone.

"I cannot allow that to happen. You know this."

>Celestia, broken, finally meets your gaze. It's not defeat, it's not guilt, nor is it pain you see this time. This time it's respect. Perhaps only a kindle, but enough to begin the bonds of renewal. Perhaps you can begin to even forgive her. And you fucking hate that.

>"Anon, what do you need?" she asks proudly.

"I already stay in the forest outside your closest settlement. That's fine for now. Besides that I need access to your archives: residential, legislative, criminal records,"

>For the first time since you've been here, she laughs. A warm, motherly gail of laughter fills the room. "Anon, this isn't your world. We have archives. The regular kind."

"Well.. yeah. Those will have to do."

>You look at Femanon, who seems eager by your side.

"Are you ready for your first adventure in a new world?"

>"Staying in a magical pony land for a whole year? Count me in." She's actually eager, too. Good. We'll need that.

"Horses, Femanon."

"They're called ponies, Anon."

>Before they can continue into another episode Celestia begins laying down the ground rules. This involves the obvious right down to the scrutinizing. She seems to be especially vehement about interacting with her subjects personally. "The less they see you and the less you see them, the better. It will only make them more curious. They'll want to get involved. I can't risk that, not them. Not again."

 

"Fine, fine. If one of them gets too close I'll throw something at it or shoo it away. Got it."

>Luna finally cuts in, "They are our SUBJECTS! We will not tolerate throwing things at them as though they are stable cattle!"

"IT WAS A JOKE, LUNA. HA HA. CALM DOWN."

>You're waving your hands around to help her get the picture but Luna's personality just hasn't developed in the last thousand years, what can you say.

>Femanon waves you off. "So does that mean we're done here? I'd personally like to get back to camp so we can start planning our first move. Still plenty of daylight left, though. Just wish we could see the sights!"

>She's talking as if this is some vacation, honestly. But her enthusiasm is refreshing, at least.

"Then by all means, my royal holiness,"

>You take a proper bow. Luna and Celestia look at each other with deadpan expressions, they are not amused.

"May I be relieved of your grace and benevolence for only just long enough to solve the matter which plagues these lands?"

>Celestia furrows her brow at you. "I already said you can stay. You have one year. Then I will take matters into my own hands.

>You resume your proper posture.

"And so will every other deity in existence, apparently."

>And with that you and your bodyguard take swift the exit of the royal quarters. Before taking full leave you turn on your heels, maintaining your direction all the while.

"I pray the next time I see you is in good tidings, your Highness."

>Before Celestia can answer, you close the door and have begun your way into this new world.

>Meanwhile, back in the quarters.

>"Sister... I understand your generosity towards yet another human but.. we can handle this ourSELVES."

>Luna seems hellbent on trying to keep any and all humans out of this, for some reason.

>"Luna, he has no where else he can go. Perhaps I can use him, even if he doesn't know everything just yet. Something tells me it won't take long for him to find out."

 

>"Humans are the most tenacious of beings. For some reason, I doubt the next time we see him will be in good tidings." She folds her wings and nods solemnly. "No. I'm almost sure of it." The only sound left is the fire crackling in the hearth behind them.

>"So, I'm guessing it's a straight shot back to the everfree forest?" You and your bodyguard are cruising through the Main Hall of Canterlot Castle at this point. Every p0ny stares at you, some in awe and some in terror and confusion, it's understandable. At least that one royal guard was nice enough about giving your gear back. That would be a pain in the ass to be without, especially here.

>Every corner you turn, every p0ny seems to stop what they're doing: nobility, earth p0nies, royal unicorns, lowly pegasi, and all the menagerie that manage to skip their way into Canterlot have a good look at you with blinking, curious eyes. You're used to the attention, Femanon isn't. Clack, clack, clack, your footsteps ring throughout the silent staring hallways. Out of time, out of step. And all you can do is just stare back. Two alien beings observing one another in passing, that's what's happening here.

>Until Femanon finally breaks the silence, in only but a whisper: "Can't the royal guards just fly us back to where we came from?"

>You have come before two great wooden doors. It seems Shining Armor has been left posted by the doors. You exchange greetings calmly, and he reminds you to stay out of sight as is per the orders of the princess of the sun. Word travels fast in Equestria.

>Once the formalities are done, Shining Armor raises a hoof to signal the opening of the two great solid wooden doors that lead to the Canterlot courtyard, and from there Canterlot the city. "Good luck, Anon. Should you need shelter, I'm sure the Princess wouldn't mind your stay here. But I guess the Everfree is just as good, right?" You both laugh. What he said was actually funny to you.

 

>The first sunlight to break through the opened doors blinds you. Wincing, you raise your great white robe sleeves to shield from the density of the sun before you cast a shade spell on your specs. Bam, instant sunglasses. You give Shining Armor a thumbs up.

"If I find anything, your princess will be the first to know."

>And then you pass through the great foyer of the main hall and out into the lush courtyard. It's bright, midday, very sunny. The light reflects off your great white robes spectacularly. Your robes are nothing special, really. White with blue bevels going from wrist to shoulder, great sleeves and cuffs and a parted torso. It turns into sort of a coat towards the lower waist, making it look more like a classical cape that stops at the back of the knees that any sort of priest might wear.

>Your staff collides with the cobblestone aggravatingly, so you hold it horizontally by your side for a while.

"I suppose they think flying is a bad idea."

>You look up, to see several flying dots  before the sun becomes too strong for your gaze. Your guess it pegasi dominate the skies above.

"Too many chances of being spotted."

>"And they think going by foot will be any easier on us?" Femanon hurries behind you, clutching her satchel while she rifles through its contents looking for something. "Maybe I have a spare invisibility thingy here..."

"Perhaps if you're patient, they'll have something planned."

>"Psst! This way!"

".. out for us."

>Your ears seek out the hushed voice halfway through the courtyard. A royal guard has been waiting by a side gate, to which upon your recognition he opens. "Shining Armor called for a carriage to take you out to the border of the Everfree forest, your.. human-ship. But we can't go any further."

"I understand."

 

>You answer as calmly as you can. If you can figure the right technique to use in the right situation, you can easily befriend these creatures.

>Perhaps they could even take a liking to you.

>It would certainly make things easier during your stay, frankly you don't know what makes Celestia so nervous.

>Nervous. Wait. We forgot to ask her.

>Just moments ago, what did she say? You try to replay the thoughts in your head as best you can.

>Before you can remember the guard drags the iron deadbolt off the main of the gate then drags one of the black iron riveted doors open for you.

"Many thanks. How many men did the princess post you up with, my humble guard?"

>He seems nervous to answer, never properly being addressed by a human before.

>But the blue-eyed, gold-maned stallion manages. "Not that many. Sir."

"Sir?"

>"Yes. Sir."

"Alright. I'm not used to that."

>"Used to what? Sir."

"That. Sir. That word, sir. Being addressed like that seems a bit too pronounced for me."

>"But, sir, I'm not addressing you. I have a question. Sir."

"What? Then why didn't you ask it?"

>"I did, sir. Er, I am."

"No, you're not. You just keep saying sir."

>"But, ending my statements with sir to any non-military bodies is actually a question. It's common practice. Sir."

"Then ask..."

>You are slowly becoming irritated.

>"Anon..." Femanon folds her arms, which is basically saying she'll have none of that.

>You sigh.

>"Do you... know the princess?" the guard finally piques the curiosity and courage of your mind.

>You wipe your hands, looking down at them.

>Then you look back at the guard and adjust your glasses.

"Yes. Yes I do."

>"How?"

>The sheer statement alone is filled with question, with curiosity, with.. doubt, also you can feel a tinge.

>A breaking bond, a waning-of-faith if you will.

>Add to that the stallion also didn't miss a beat.

>It's like he was ready to ask you that single word.

>It is totally within your mystical prowess to tell the currents of an individual because to you, it's personified in their words.

 

 

>The ability to pick up on any stray detail, with pinpoint precision to be exact.

>You narrow your eyes at him.

>He gulps.

>But then you smile.

"It's a long story to me. A tall-tale for you. Let's hope, for your sake, I can stay just a myth. Do you understand?"

>The guard nods, although that human didn't exactly say how he knew the princess.

>"You were never here. Sir." .... "that time I was addressing y-"

"Yeah I figured. Thanks for the ride,"

>The guard salutes and holds that position until you and femanon move through the black iron gate.

>Immediately on the other side you end up on a sidewalk to a one lane, well-paved road.

>An arch sprawls above you, supported by a column of marble decorated pillars holding banners, streamers, festive things like that.

>The columns stretch all the way across the one lane road and position into a high tower with gold embellished on every trace of its bulbous design.

>The archway above you is the upper-stairs entrance.

>The other entrance you take note of is on ground floor across the road, at the base of the tower. Entrance floor.

>In the middle of the road sits an extended luxury chariot on great white wheels.

>"This is the stealth model!" you hear a mid-pitched hill-billy accent careening into your ear holes.

>You look down, and there's a five-foot billy-goat in front of you.

>He is wearing greasy overalls and a red trucker's hat worn backwards.

>"Name's Sampson! I'm the castle's res-ee-dent-shill mechanic! I do all the work on 'em chariots, double single and triple-decker-yes-they-do-exist, flyin' chariots no-fly chariots I do big-wheel-small-wheel-medium-wheel-size charrots I done work on boats and airships too! Hell I can fly from here to manehattan with the tinsel in yer pockit!"

>This is Sampson and he said "Charrots" and that made you laugh.

>Sampson's alright.

>You look at the chariot designed for you now, sitting in the middle of the one lane road.

"Did you build that chariot as well?"

 

>The billy goat nods energetically.

"Impressive work."

>You listen to Sampson ramble on about the real mechanics of it, before Femanon whispers something to you.

>"Does that chariot look funny to you?"

"Funny?"

>"I don't know, it's just... something's not right about it."

"I don't see anything wrong with it."

>Sampson, meanwhile, is trying to teach you his favorite secret-dirty-handshake.

>"What? Fine, maybe I'm just seeing things, but... I don't know, Anon."

"Hmmm.."

>You have to interrupt Sampson now and bid farewell.

>It's time for you to be getting back anyway.

"Delighted to meet you Sampson, but I'm afraid I have to get going."

>You shake his billy-goat-hoof once again.

>"By the way stranger, I didn't catchername?"

"It's Anon. And that's my apprentice, Femanon."

>She waves ever-so-photogenically.

>"Anon. I'll be suretorememberdat."

>You blink.

>It could have been any noble p0ny, but this billy goat wasn't scared to speak to you.

>It's the first time you've been treated like a person since you got here and you like that.

>You and Femanon bid goodbye to the mechanic so he can get back to working on the body for the first model prototype motor car.

>You paid attention when he told you they were coming out with motor car technology in Fillydelphia.

>Canterlot was going to be among the first to have prestige-class auto-mobiles.

>It was a new and exciting time to be a p0ny, you suspect.

>You and Femanon make your way to the chariot and step in.

>The red interior overtakes your eyesight for a moment.

>There's gold on every handle, pearls encrusted on every woven and sewn edge of tapestry.

>It's a little small though, granted you and Femanon are average human height.

>You've done some measuring and discovered that fully-grown-standard-bred-mares are about three feet and five inches height.

>While stallions remain to be around four to five to six feet (six feet being an inch or so taller than yourself and Femanon).

>You suddenly take note of the interior.

 

>A feeling washes over you.

>Nostalgia. This is nostalgia you're feeling.

>The nuances in the craftsmanship seem familiar to you.

>The regal oval windows on either side, the pearl-encrusted woven tapestries and cushions.  

>But it doesn't seem familiar in a way that you've seen before, somehow new but still very old and antique.

>Your senses can't place it, really.

>The feeling just hangs listlessly in the air, unable to be pulled down by rational thought or reason.

>You can't shake it, but nor can you grasp its entirety.

>Sunlight bathes the lush red interior of the chariot.

>That's when you notice Femanon, who sits adjacent and crosslegged to you.

>Normally her leather padded waist-skirt covers her upper legs, but with the way she's sitting it's riding up to her upper thighs.

>The sunlight reflects magnificently on her bare, pale skin.

>You adjusts your glasses and clear your throat.

>And then her eyes meet yours.

>Magnificent blue eyes.

>She looks like she's about to say something, but you quickly cut her off.

"Celestia is hiding something from me."

>"...?" her face makes it look like she's having trouble understanding, as if you expected her to know exactly what you're talking about.

>"Like what?"

"That's what I don't know. But she's nervous. Why would she be nervous."

>"She could be nervous for a lot of reasons. She is a princess."

"No. If she didn't have anything to hide, she wouldn't be so paranoid of us being here. Nervous people are never good at hiding things, because they know they aren't supposed to, in the long run."

>Slowly, sense and logic start to break the density of Femanon's see-the-good-in-everybody-gland.

>"Maybe so.. but we still don't know what she's hiding.

>You both lean forward when a stallion in a black top hat and grey coat jump atop the cart, followed by two royal guards who are apparently going to pull the thing.

>The closed chariot bucks to life and smoothly rolls into the one lane road leading out of canterlot