cyborgPunzel, /r9k/elsa and... Eugene? Robot Sandwich Time

Robot Sandwiches

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“So, Elsa, Eugene has something he wants to say to you.” Rapunzel smiled giddily as the pair sat, staring across each other from opposite sides of the kitchen table.

 

For two totally different people, Elsa and Eugene had almost identical expressions of ‘this is a load of bullshit’ as they slumped on their chairs, wondering why they had to put up with their mutual connection. Elsa was the first to break the silence.

 

“Rapunzel, this is a terrible idea. I’m going home” Elsa said, actively ignoring Eugene as she glared at her cousin. She made a move to push back her chair, only to have Rapunzel’s feet jerk the chair leg back into place, knocking Elsa back into the seat with a thud.

 

“NO! We are going to have this nice, CIVILIZED conversation and we’re going to patch things up!” Rapunzel said with her stubborn tone, going to the counter for a second then plopping down a quivering bowl of lutefisk in front of Elsa. “Good feelings!” Rapunzel smiled.

 

“She spent two hours making that monstrosity.” Eugene said from the corner of his mouth to Elsa. Even if it was one of her favorite meals, Elsa did have to admit that the towering blob was a bit intimidating.

 

“Ah, so the Snow Queen CAN smile. I knew it.”

 

Elsa gasped, realizing that she had given a small grin at Eugene’s crack. She ducked her head, face burning with shame at being caught off guard.

 

“OW! Hey…” Eugene suddenly yelped, giving Rapunzel a hurt stare as he reached down to rub his shin.

 

“Eugene! I thought I told you not to make jokes like that!” Rapunzel said in exasperation. She kicked him again to prove her point, and Eugene scooted his chair back to avoid his girlfriend’s assault.

 

“Is this how you two are always like?” Elsa said in a deadpan, watching the two at their antics.

 

“Well, no, sometimes we actually do this naked. Rapunzel has a sadistic streak where –“ “EUGENE!” “OW! OW! OW!!” Rapunzel had actually stood up from her seat and was starting to bat at Eugene’s hair, the older man laughing as he attempted to duck and tried in vain not to get hit by her tiny hands.

 

They both stopped when a voice like a ringing bell started to fill the kitchen with laughter.

 

“You two are idiots. Am I in a sitcom or something?” Elsa chuckled, and while her laughter was still laced with cynicism, she looked a bit more relaxed than when Rapunzel had pulled Eugene into the room.

 

Rapunzel smiled too, and she looked at Eugene. He shrugged, never on to look a gift horse in the mouth, and pushed his chair back to the table. Elsa had started to munch on the lutefisk and looked at least willing to entertain what the two of them had to say.

 

“So, listen, about the other night. It was a dick move on my part. Rapunzel told me about all the robotics stuff and how I should be a little more… I dunno, tactful?” Eugene said, his voice more sincere as he leaned back on his seat.

 

Elsa looked up from her plate with a mouthful of lutefisk, switching back from Rapunzel and Eugene. She chewed her food thoughtfully, using the time to think.

 

“Eugene. You’re a normalfag. You’ll never understand what it’s like and ‘tact’ won’t be enough. I appreciate the gesture, but I’d rather you just stayed away from me.” Elsa said. She stopped for a moment then spoke up again. “Maybe if things were different, we might have been able to hang out without problems.” She turned away from Eugene to look at Rapunzel.

 

“You can do what you want, Rapunzel. You’re my friend, and I’m thankful to the bottom of my heart that we can be the way we are with each other in comfort. But I don’t think anything can help with what I’m dealing with.” Elsa said, pushing the empty plate of lutefisk away. Rapunzel wanted to ask her to stay, but the way that Elsa spoke, she knew that it would be a bad idea to push it.

 

“But, Rapunzel. Thank you for trying. It means a lot to me.” Elsa said, turning to look back at her cousin as she was halfway out the door.

 

Rapunzel couldn’t help but smile brightly right back.

 

“You’re worth it, Elsa.” Rapunzel said simply, and Elsa blushed furiously, turning away.

 

“It’s raid night. Make sure you pick up a flask from the guild bank.” Elsa said simply, but Rapunzel could see the ghost of a smile on the girl’s face.

 

And just like that, Elsa turned away and slammed the door.

 

The door frame shook a bit, and Eugene and Rapunzel found themselves alone with each other.

 

“I think you got through to her blondie.” Eugene said, standing up and patting Rapunzel’s shoulder.

 

“Yeah… I think I did.” She smiled, putting her hand over his. They sat there for a moment in comfortable silence.

 

“Soooooo… how long before your parents come home?”

 

“Eugene!” Rapunzel laughed, giving him a playful bop. But then she looked at the clock surreptitiously. “… well… they won’t be coming back for at least another two hours…”

 

“More than enough time to de-robotificate you some more.” Eugene smirked, and, just for a little bit, Rapunzel let herself melt under his smolder.