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“New Warsaw Pact’s got an armored column with infantry support ‘running exercises,’ about ten minutes from the border. The 8th Kosovo Guards Division says they can hold ‘em for about a day, but then they’ll be broken or captured. “ Swearing’ll do no good, now. It’ll only make me look like an uncouth American in front of her generals and Court –which I am, but there’s no need for them to know how badly I can swear.

 

“What’ve we got in reserve, Boris?” It’s a rhetorical question; I know perfectly well what I’ve got in reserve to defend a fledgling Kingdom of Serbia from enemies on all sides. Five Rifles Divisions to guard against NATO, another five for the New Warsaw Pact, and then three to protect against Turkish encroachment.  That’s not enough for anything, really. So I sigh, stand from the table her officers and myself are gathered around, and nod. “Gentlemen.  This grand adventure’s going to come crashing down. Order the Rifles and Guards Tanks to stand down. I’ll take Her Majesty and do what monarchs fleeing have always done. Keep her safe and healthy. Godspeed, gentlemen.” We exchange nods, and I leave the War Room. Nothing doing, now.

 

I stalk through the halls, growling in a mixture of Serbian, Russian, and English at any one that gets in my way. When I reach my bedroom, more of a small closet off her rooms, I change from the dress uniform she insists we wear to the dark brown and green tartan kilt she insists I wear, and a camouflage blouse. Sporran, ammo-webbing, and pistol belt go on next, and then I pick up my AKM and stride from the room, into her bedroom.

 

She’s laying sprawled across the bed, wearing one of my t-shirts and a pair of boxers, and reading a book. “Alex! What’re you doing dressed for battle?” I scowl, drop my rifle on her bed, and yank open her dresser drawers, and start shoving clothing into a bag I grab from the floor beside her dresser.

 

“Time to go, Natalia. You need to get dressed.”

 

“Go where, Alex?”

 

“Somewhere safe.”

 

“But we’re safe he-“

 

“Shut up and do as I say.” I haven’t spoken to her like this since I was out of the Army and couldn’t sleep at night, and she’d try to whisper to me that’d it be okay. It wasn’t okay then, and it won’t be now.

 

“Alex I haven’t seen you like this for-“

 

“No time. Get dressed.” I finish packing for her, and I’m about to speak when an artillery shell explodes. I wince, swear, and with a complete disregard for royal propriety, pick her up and sling her over a shoulder. Considering I’ve made love to her in the falling rain in the middle of a wheat field, with my plaid beneath us, royal propriety can kiss my ass.