Under your wing

>"Guys...I'm sorry. I can't go to the Fall Formal with you. My Dad got a look at my report card and I'm grounded. Have fun without me."

>"I'll go have a talk with your father."

>"No...seriously Anon don't, he's like the meanest person ever I totally don't want you hurt or anything!"

>You pump out your chest and stick your thumb right into it.

>"I'm the toughest guy in da whole school! I even fought a bear!"

>Thats a fair statement, even though you lost within 4 seconds.

>"O-okay Anon. If you think you're really up to it." Rainbow Dash rubs her arm slightly, looking nervousally. "But it's totally cool if you back out because seriously, the guy is like Arnold Scharzenagger on ultras steroids, and I really don't want to have to take you to the hospital. There was this one time, this guy said something to him, and he literally picked him up and bent him into 5 pieces and threw him like a boomerang, and then punched him as the guy returned, who then exploded, AND THEN EXPLODED AGAIN!"

>She is waving her arms frantically.

>"It's cool Rainbow, I can deal with hard cases, besides I really like you, and I really want to go to the Fall Formal with you. I'll take the pain for it."

>She blushes. "Well, don't say I didn't warn you Anon..."

>She gets up and walks off waving a little at you.

 

>What have you gotten yourself into this time?

>The time of dread approaches, you swallow your fear as the final class bell rings.

>You pack your things into your manly backpack as you shuffle into the crowd of multicoloured students.

>You begin hearing whispers amongst the crowd.

>"Didja hear? Anons totally going to meet Mr Dash! I hope he has good health insurance!"

>"Oh man, I wouldn't want to be in Anon's shoes..."

>"I just hope they have enough body bags to pick up all the body parts..."

>You feel a little unnerved, and continue walking towards the exit.

>Suddenly you feel a slap on your back, you draw back from shock and quickly turn around.

>"Sorry Anon, must have spooked you! Hahahaha"

>It was Normal Norman, one of your closest friends, you pant and regain your composure.

>"Nah, didn't scare me one bit Norman."

>Norman laughs as he puts his arm around you.

>"Hey Anon, we're friends right?"

>You feel a little akward as you slowly slip from under his arm.

>"Yeah Norman, just....friends. Why?"

>" Well, I was hoping you had something in your will that you could leave me since you're going to fight Mr Dash and all."

>"What? No! I'm just going to talk to him!"

>"Talk, fight, its all the same to Mr Dash."

>You shake your head as you run out the door.

>"Make sure you leave me your wicked sweet bike Anon!" Norman cries out at you.

 

>Ugh, just fucking ugh. Maybe you don't have to do this, maybe you can hang out with Rainbow Dash another time. I mean the Fall Formal is a once in a lifetime sort of thing, and its not like you'd be missing the one opprotunity of your life for guarenteed romantic and sexy times with the girl you've had a crush on since pre-K.

 

>You steel yourself. No. I'm going to do this no matter the cost.

>You arc your back and walk towards Rainbow Dash's house.

>25 minutes later, there you are. 589 Dead Mans Lane. You slowly walk toward the door, the lawn is full of finely pedicured grass and decorative garden gnomes.

>You ring the doorbell...DING DONG.

>An akward silence comes over you, like the CLAM before the storm.

>You hear a gruff voice. "YEAH WHADDYA WANT?"

>You shuffle nervousally.

>"SPEAK UP MAGGOT OR GET THE FUCK OFF OF MY LAWN!"

>You gulp. "I-I'am Anon E Mousse, I'm Rainbow Dash's friend, I want to talk to you sir."

>The door slowly opens as a towering figure of masculinity appears before you. Mother of God, the titan that appears before you is 7 foot 2, and 5 times the width of you. He looks like a bulging tumor of muscle, with a crop top and a cop mustache. His arm is wider than your waist line.

>He sneers down at you, and snorts.

>"And what makes you think I want to talk to a pissant like you?"

>Your knees begin to quake.

>"Well, I wanted to talk about Rainbow Dash being grounded. I'd like you to unground her.

>He stares at you intensely, you can feel the hatred shimmering off of his sweaty pectorals.

>Suddenly, he begins laughing with his whole body.

>"Wait...you thought? AHAHAHAHAHA. That is HILARIOUS!"

>He slaps your back, you can feel your entire spine shiver at the shockwave.

>"You thought....I was? BAHAHAHA."

>You bring your finger up to ask the obvious question.

>"You are Rainbow Dash's father....Mr Dash... right?"

>He begins laughing even harder. "No GOD no... Mr Dash is my father."

>He turns around. "HEY POPS! SOMEONE IS HERE TO SEE YOU!"

>He puts his massive hand on your shoulder, and gives you a thumbs up. "Good luck soldier, you're going to need it with him."

>"Uhh... thanks...I guess, Mr..."

>"Call me Biff, thats what my little sister calls me."

>"Okay... thanks Biff."

>Biff walks back into the house, oh god, if Biff was this horrid monstrosity of fitness, just imagine what his father is like.

>You begin to nervousally standing on your tip toes at the horrid monstrosity of a man that seeded Biff into existance to be.

>"Uh hello young man?"

>You snap out of your delusion, and look in front of you, there's no one there!

>"Uhh, hello?"

>"Down here you silly goose! Use your eyes you big palooka!"

>You look down to see a short, pudgy 3 foot 4 main with a goofy mustache, a big nose, and a Rainbow tie.

>"Uhh.... Mr Dash I presume?"

>"Why heavens to murgatroy yes I am! And who are you my fine suited friend?"

>"Uh....I'm Anon Y Mousse... I'm a friend of Rainbow Dash."

>"OhohohohohoHO! So YOU'RE the fellow she keeps on prattling on about, Oh DO please come in sir!"

>You rub the back of your neck as he leads you in.

>"Mind your step, its quite the landfill in here!"

> You don't see the problem, it looks cleaner than an OCD medical clean room thats been quaratined.

>"Uck, I am so sorry to have introduced you to our household when its such a pigsty!" He complains loudly as he leads you to the living room.

>"No really its quite alright Mr Dash, how do you manage to keep up?"

>"Oh well, its really never that easy m'boy." he climbs up into his Dad lounge chair as he finds his pipe and his fez.

>"Always some tiny piece of dust lying about and causing a perfectly proud pedicured place of personal privitary into a loud obnoxious hullaboo of depravity."

>He strikes up a match and lights his pipe.

>"Please please, do make yourself comfortable Anon.

>You look around you, there are plastic covers over all the furnitature, you really don't want to dirty anything up, but you brush yourself off and sit on a nice brown Ottoman. Mr Dash rasies an eyebrow, but shrugs off your choice of butt resting.

>"And what do I have the privelage of speaking with you about today Anon?"

>You blank out for a second.

>"I thought you'd be a lot....scarier Mr Dash."

>Mr Dash drops his pipe in shock as he emits an effeminate gasp.

>"WHA-? MOI? SCARY? Wherever on earth did you hear that m'boy?"

>You think back to Rainbow Dash telling everyone at school that her Dad was the meanist, grittiest, roughest junkyard dog who'll rip a man to shreds if he so much looked at him the wrong way.

>Wait, no don't tell him that, you're here to get her ungrounded.

>"Well, it was just my image of you sir," you nervousally laugh as you bullshit through your teeth.

>"What with your son being a...fit person, and your daughter being the atheltic type, I just assumed that you were a very intimidating person. No offense of course."

>"No offense taken Anon, yes I know my son is quite the big lad, and my daughter is a bit brash, but the only thing I'm intimidating toward is dirty icky muck!"

>He begins screaming like a little girl.

>"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK MY PERFECTLY MANICURED MINK CARPET! RUINED BY MY TERRIBLE HABIT!"

>He quickly leaves the room and returns in a dash in a maid headdress and an apron, brandishing a vacuum cleaner.

>"It's time for you dust, to bite the dust!"

>He begins vacuuming intensly at the spoiled spot as you slowly begin to realize why Dash was fibbing to everyone. Her dad is a complete pansy! She was talking about her brother to everyone! This is gonna be a piece of cake!

>Mr Dash finishes vacuuming and begins spraying carpet cleaner on the spot, as he sits back down on his Dad lounge chair.

>"Sorry lad, now where were we?"

>You crack your fingers and boast.

>"Well, I know Rainbow was grounded, and can't attend the Fall Formal, but I'd like you to unground her, so she can go with me."

>Mr Dash rubs his mustache intesenly and begins giggling like a school girl.

>"Well as much as I'd like to see my lovely little girl go to the Fall Formal with such a nice gentleman, I'm going to have to decline your offer. No offense Anon."

>Wait...what?

>Let's try this again.

>"Are you sure Mr Dash? I mean just because she had a bad report card..."

>He slowly raises his eyebrow.

>"What bad report card Anon?"

>Yikes... looks like you dun goofed.

>"Well, I mean, that's why she's grounded yes?"

>His brow begins to furrow, as he takes a long drag from his pipe.

>"Noooo.... she was grounded, because she left approxiamtely .022 microliters of orange juice in the fridge, and didn't have the common courtesy to finish the carton."

>Oh... right, of course she did.

>Mr Dash put his hands together, and began thinking deeply. You fidget nervousally on the Ottoman, things are going from bad to worse.

>"Rainbow deary! Could you please see your Papa for a minute?" He yells out.

>"Coming Daddy!" you hear from upstairs.

>You hear footsteps coming down, and you see Rainbow Dash walk into the living room.

>She sees you, and does a quick gasp as she puts on a fake smile, obviousally screaming silently "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

>"Rainy-poo, Mr Anon here tells me he wants to go to the Fall Formal with you, is that correct Mr Anon?"

>He looks back to you, and you dumbly shake your head.

>"He also tells me something about a... what was it again, a bad report card?"

>Oh...shit. She totally lied about why she was grounded because she wanted to keep the 'Tough Dad' routine.

>She looks at you and stares daggers into your eyes.

>"Well, snookums, could you please fetch your report card and show Papa please?"

>She sighs, "Yes" she looks back at you intensely. "Daddy."

>She stomps back up the steps. You look toward her direction and see Biff in the kitchen making choking and hanging charades.

>God damn it Biff

>"Tea anon?" Mr Dash offers.

>"No thank you I'm good." you reply.

>"Are you sure? Its Lemongrass" he remarks taking a sip from his tiny porcelin teacup.

>"No no, I'm quite good thank you though." You chuckle as you look back at the kitchen and see Biff making pinkie out tea sipping charades at you

>You hear loud angry stomps coming down the stairs. Rainbow Dash walks into the living room again and hands her father her report card.

> Mr Dash takes the paper and reads it furiously.

>"Hmm. Physical Education, A+ Very well done my dear!"

>Rainbow beams for a moment.

>"Oh... Equestrian History.D- Advanced Calcus II D- Retro Fitting Vintage Cars Class, D- Underwater Basket Weaving....E?"

>He begins waving the report card at Rainbow.

>"How do you score an E? That's not even rationally possible!"

> Rainbow smiles and her eyes begin darting back and forth.

>You take action.

>"Certainly that means, 'Excellent'."

>You look at Rainbow Dash and wink.

>"Right Rainbow?"

>"Oh y-yeah! Totally Daddy! I did the course so well they gave me an E."

>Mr Dash rolls his eyes as he taps his pipe.

>"Nice try Dashie." He looks at you disappointingly.

>"And you Anon."

>Ouch, you felt that one.

>"But the teacher wrote an explanation here, 'Ms Rainbow Dash has scored an E in the course meaning that 'Even the special needs children can pass this course with flying colours''' C'mon Rainbow, even that gray girl from down the road can pass this class!"

>She throws her hands in the air and grunts.

>"Fine, yes, Dad. I don't do well in class because I'm always practicing for soccer, and when I'm not, I'm practicing for volleyball, and when I'm not practicing for either, I'm practicing for sumo judo wrestling."

>Do we even have that sport at our school?

>Mr Dash sighs deeply. "Well, then its settled then Rainy-poo. As much as I hate to be the sourpuss here, it looks like the only method of improving your grades, is to ground you from post school activities."

>"WHAT?" Rainbow screams out in anger.

>"I'm sorry, but a girl needs to have more than just athletics to her Dash. Until your grades have improven I forbid you from any extra cirricular activies."

>"Dad, you can't serious."

>Mr Dash furrowed his massive eyebrows as his moustache twitched.

>"Rainbow. Room. Now."

>Rainbow glares at you with an intense anger, as she stomps out of the room and back up the stairs. You can hear a loud slamming of a door.

>You look in the kitchen and see Biff shaking his head in disapproval at you.

>God damn it Biff, stop making me feel worse.

>"Oh... now I've gone and killed the atmosphere, I'm terribly sorry Anon." Mr Dash says as he offers you a bit of raspberry tart.

>You decline his offer, and respond.

>"No, its quite alright Mr Dash, its my fault."

>Mr Dash laughs as he nibbles at his tart.

>"No no don't be silly m'boy, I'm actually quite surprised."

>You raise your eyebrow quizzingly.

>"With all the time my daughter spends on physical sports, its a wonder how she is able to spend any time with her family, let alone you."

>Ouch...indirect feels.

>"She talks about you all the time Anon, she really seems to trust you and enjoys your company immensily.

>Please...stop...oh God the guilt.

>Mr Dash stares sadly into his teacup.

>"She reminds me of her mother so much." He glances to a family photo of the Dash family. Rainbow looks like shes 5, making a tough pose, on her Father shoulder's. Biff flexing his biceps, jesus even as a kid he is still bigger than you! And an extremely Amazonian woman wearing a white sundress with a sunhat.

>"Oh...I'm so sorry Mr Dash."

>Mr Dash wipes a tear from his eye.

>"No don't be Anon. Please, call me Pepper."

>You smile slightly. "Uh, sure Mr...Sir...Dr?"

>Pepper smiles and laughs back at your akwardness. "Pepper will do just fine."

>"I'm sorry for your loss Pepper." you state, "if its not too much trouble, how did she...I mean... your wife..."

>Pepper stared back into his teacup. "It was the big C."

>"Oh...cancer." you state forlornly.

>"No, the Big C from the Coca Cola sign fell right on top of her."

>Oh. That's....morbid.

>"Ever since I've been raising those two by myself, and I support both of my children. Heavens know that I was against him joining the Marines, but I can now proudly say I'm glad my son chose his way in life."

>He looks back at the photo, "It's how she lived her life too."

>Oh god, all these feels. You got to right this scenario.

>"Mr....I mean Pepper. I want you to know that I really like Rainbow, I came here thinking I was going to be pummeled to paste just for being here. And I still really like Rainbow, and I'd do anything to spend time with her. If its alright with you, I'd like to help her with her classes, maybe be a tutor."

>Pepper folds his hands again, and looks at you.

>"You'd be willing to take time from your busy schedule to help my daughter with her studies? You do know that she does an intense amount of sports right? She's the captain of the soccer, volleyball and the sumo judo wrestling team. You'd barely have anytime for yourself, or for your social life whatsoever. Are you really sure about this Anon?"

>You lean back on the Ottoman, and think about the situation. If what he is saying is true, that means no hanging out at the mall anymore with your pals, no more looking at gals with Norman in the Chick Fil A parking lot, no more skateboarding at Chucks SkateboardoRama. Is this really a sacrifice you'd really want to make?

>You take a big gulp.

>"Yes, I would Pepper. I know that athletics means the entire world to Rainbow, and I know she is always constantly trying her best in everything she can."

>You stand up and began preaching like a politician.

>"But we both know, that she alone can't carry the world on her shoulders. Whereas your decision would allievate her of her outside blocks from her education, I believe my offer would allow her to keep doing the things she loves, with someone else there to help support her. I don't want to see her fail, not in your eyes, but not in her eyes either, and I personally think that your decision would do the latter."

>You slam your hands down on the coffee table.

>"So yes, I would support her, and I'd stand by her, with every chance I'd get, even if it means losing my personal time, and a little sleep. I just like Rainbow that much, so that's my offer."

>You extend your hand.

>"Take it or leave it."

>Pepper looks back at you in a bit of a shock, and begins chuckling. He shakes his head and begins laughing even harder.

>"Well young man, you certainly drive a hard bargain, but I think I can come to terms with this."

>He takes your hand and you both shake hands.

>"Please, take care of my daughter Anon."

>You look at the family photo, and smile back at him.

>"I don't have to, she's a strong girl, who is going to live her life to the fullest, and to her fullest extent. I'll be there to cheer her from the sidelines and tag in when she needs support. She's a great friend, and a great girl. You should be very proud of her."

>He chuckles once again.

>"I am very proud of her, especially with her choice of men."

>Pepper yells out loud again.

>"Dashy! You're ungrounded!"

>"SWEET!"

>You hear frantic footsteps running down the stairs, Rainbow rushes into the living room and hugs Pepper.

>"Thank you Daddy!" she states as she kisses him.

>"Don't thank me Rainbow, thank Anon here."

>She looks at you with a puzzled look.

>"Anon offered up all his freetime to tutor you and help you raise your grades a little bit. Meaning that you can continue to go to your after school activities, just as long as Anon is there to keep up with you."

>She blushes at you, and holds her arm.

>"Thanks Anon...that was really sweet of you."

> She slaps your chest, "But you're definately going to have to pick up the pace to keep up with me on the field!"

>"No problem!" You state as you puff out your chest and stick your thumb in it.

>"I'm da toughest guy around."

>"HEY! I HEARD THAT!" you hear Biff yell from the kitchen.

>You, Rainbow, and Pepper all enjoy a hardy laugh as a time wipe dissolve appears indicating that a short amount of time has passed.

>A montage begins of you tutoring Rainbow Dash as she is playing soccer with her teammates. You are holding a Quantum Calculus textbook as a stray soccer ball flies toward your head. She jumps in the way and takes the blow for you, as you both fall to the ground. Rainbow looks down at you as you look back up at her, and you both blush.

>"So the theory behind Nordstorm's String Theory is..." You begin rambling

>She grunts and rolls her eyes as she picks up you and continues to play soccer.

>Another time wipe dissolve occurs where you and Dash are studying out of a 5,000 pg text book. She falls asleep on your arm, and you smile as you put your head on hers, she nustles in closer and snuggles your chest.

 

>Another time wipe dissolve, Rainbow is presenting her thesis as you are there in the audience giving her thumbs up and holding up reminder cards. She gets a round of applause and an A+.

 

>Finally the night of the Fall Formal comes around, which coincidentally is when the season round of report cards comes out.

 

>You and Dash look at each other nervousally, as Pepper reviews the report card.

 

>"All A+'S!!! Congratulations you two!"

>You both high five each other, as Dash turns quickly and asks.

>"Does this mean?"

>Pepper nods his head.

>"AW YEAH!" Rainbow exclaimed as she pumped her fists into the air. She quickly ran up to her bedroom and slammed the door.

>Pepper chuckled and turned to you.

>"I must say, I am really impressed Anon. You really turned things around for Rainbow."

>You rub your neck in embaressment.

>"Well, it wasn't easy, learning how to be physically active again was definately a chore."

>You both laugh, as he extends his hand again.

>"Seriously, thank you very much for taking care of my little girl. I'm very proud of both of you, and I'd be delighted to have you escort her to the Fall Formal this evening...just...whenever she's ready."

>"Well, you know...girls." You take his hand and shake as you both laugh.

>"Why don't you head on home and get ready yourself? Gotta look nice for a Fall Formal Anon!"

>"Oh right! Uhh, I'll run home as fast as possible!" You excitedly claim.

>"Nonsense, Biff will give you a ride. BIFF!"

>"YEAH POPS?" you hear from upstairs

>"Could you give Anon a ride to his home?"

>"SURE NO PROB, BE DOWN IN A SEC!"

>You hear heavy footsteps descending the stairs, Biff gives you a pat on the back, revibrating your spine once again.

>"C'mon champ! Let's go get you ready for your big date!"

>"S-s-s-sure. Let's go Biff." you state wobbly.

>"Drive safe you two!" Pepper stated as he began to sit in his lounge chair.

>"Ah, no worries Pops, Anon is a good second in command kind of guy aren't ya fellow?"

>"Uhh...sure?"

>He slaps your back again. Ow. Your sciatica.

>You and Biff leave the house as Pepper opens the newspaper and looks at his family photo.

>"She's really met a nice guy Patrice. Looks like we'll be updating the photos around here."

>You and Biff get into his Chevorlet.

>Huh, plush seats. NICE.

>Biff turns his ignition on as he blares some college rock over the radio. You begin driving home to your place.

>"Hey Anon." Biff breaks the silence.

>"Yeah Biff?" you ask cautiously.

>"You know, for such a twerp, you ain't a bad guy. I could really get used to seeing your face more often." He says as he picks his nose.

>"T-thanks?" you answer.

>"Just... don't do anything stupid alright? I may be 27, but I'm still too young to be called Uncle alright?" he begins to insinuate.

>"Oh... well, uh." you start to mumble.

>"Here. Take this." He slaps your chest, which fourtuantly because of the plush cushioning softened the blow to your spine. You look at what he gave you. There are several packets of condoms laying on your lap.

>"Just, don't tell my Dad okay?"

>You look at Biff and you begin to laugh, and he starts laughing alongside with you.

>The rest of the ride was enjoyable, Biff drops you off at your place, and says he'll call before picking you up.

>You head on inside, and get ready for tonight.

>SEVERAL HOURS LATER

>Damn, you look fine, a nice ass suit, a fine squirt of cologne, and a gelled back doo that makes you look like a casanova. You slip the condoms into your wallet, and look at yourself in the mirror.

>"Get ready for a whole alot of Anon Rainbow Dash."

>You hear the phone ring.

 

HAPPY ENDING HERE

http://pastebin.com/T2j73Kzs

DRAMATIC ENDING HERE

http://pastebin.com/begFQqvn