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Aquaman Vs. the Sea Fluffies

By: fluffyscribe on Jul 24th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 2.74 KB  |  hits: 138  |  expires: Never
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  1. >Be Aquaman.  Swimmin' through the oceans and shit.
  2. >Pissed that the Marvel heroes think they're hot shit since Avengers raped the box office.
  3. >Think you'll cool off by plowing a mermaid, when something catches your eye.
  4. >"Fwuffy wuv kelp."  "Fwuffy wuv kelpies too! Am good nummies!  Wuv swim!"
  5. >WHAT IN THE CRAP ARE THOSE?
  6. >FLUFFY PONIES?!  IN YOUR PERFECT OCEAN?!
  7. >Not just normal fluffy ponies.  They have sea-horse tails, and gills and fins.
  8. >There's a huge bunch of them, maybe as much as a hundred on the seabed.
  9. >They're all eating kelp and seaweed, swimming around in circles, hugging.
  10. >Digusting... they think they have a right to exist.
  11. >You crash down in front of them at high speed.  Freaks them the fuck out.
  12. >"STAND DOWN, YOU FUCKING ABOMINATIONS!" you roar.
  13. >Sea fluffies freak a little.
  14. >"Ahh! No be mad!"  "Fwuffy sowwy!"  "Fishy hooman angwy! Hewp!"
  15. >"I AM AQUAMAN, LORD OF THE OCEAN AND ALL AQUATIC CREATURES!"
  16. >They start approaching you.  Swimming around your legs.  Trying to hug you with their fins.
  17. >"YOU ARE MONSTERS.  DESECRATIONS OF TRUE LIFE."
  18. >"Whu? Fishy hooman siwwy!"  "Huggies?  New daddy?  Wan' kelp, daddy!"
  19. >You summon your shark friends with your Aquapowers.
  20. >Great whites speed over your shoulders.
  21. >Sea fluffies freak the fuck out.  Hahaha idiots.
  22. >"Munstahs!  Munstahs!"  "Wun! Munstahs eat fwuffies! Hewp!"
  23. >Three sharks start chewing up every fluffy they can snatch.
  24. >Ridiculous amount of fluffy gets torn up as sea fluffies shriek in terror.
  25. >"YOU ARE POORLY DESIGNED!  WHY WOULD AN AQUATIC CREATURE NEED FLUFF?!"
  26. >Sharks are entertaining, but there's still a hundred sea fluffies in panic.
  27. >Summon all your animal friends now.
  28. >A sea fluffy family, father mother and foals, huddles into a cave to hide from the sharks.
  29. >Tentacles suddenly creep over cave entrance.  Octopus has them trapped.
  30. >"Hewp, mummah!" foals cry as tentacles reach in toward them. "No wike! Hewp! Munstah!"
  31. >Fluffy colt tries biting tentacles.  Does no damage.  The tentacles wrap around all five of them and strangles the life out of them.
  32. >More sharks and predator fish swoop into the fray and literally tear the shit out of sea fluffies.
  33. >A sea fluffy dares to approach you.
  34. >"No huwt sea fwuffies, mistah! Pwese! Am good fwuffy! Fwuffy sowwy!"
  35. >A porpoise swoops in and impales the fluffy on its horn.
  36. >"HA! WELL DONE, PORPOISE!"
  37. >Remember to give that porpoise a medal later on.  That was awesome.
  38. >The numbers are dwindling.
  39. >Blood and fluffy litter the water in ever direction.
  40. >This isn't enough.  It's time to rid the world of sea fluffies.
  41. >Start campaign to free the oceans of these abominations.
  42. >Gets made into blockbuster movie.  Aquaman versus the Sea Fluffies.
  43. >Doesn't make half what The Avengers did.
  44. >Fuckin' Marvel Faggots.
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