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Spaghetti Sparkle 3 - The Plan

By: bettyspaghetti on Mar 22nd, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 6.64 KB  |  hits: 1,701  |  expires: Never
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  1. Spaghetti Sparkle 3
  2.  
  3. >it's been 2 months since you've seen or heard from Twilight Sparkle
  4. >you hope she hasn't killed herself
  5. >it's a slow day at the video store (tuesday)
  6. >you suddenly remember that she rented your season 2 boxset of gundam
  7. >3 or 4 p0nies have asked if it was in stock the last few weeks
  8. >decide that since it's a slow day you'll close up shop and go get that boxset
  9. >it also gives you the perfect opportunity to enact your plan
  10.  
  11. >on the way over you contemplate your plans on how to end her crush on you
  12. >PLAN A: Ask Spaghetti Sparkle out on a date.
  13. >get her to think you're dating
  14. >whenever she wants to become intimate, reject her
  15. >she gets fed up
  16. >she ragequits the relationship
  17. >OR
  18. >PLAN B: get her to date you
  19. >introduce her to colts with her tastes in media (weeaboo)
  20. >instigate a relationship between them
  21. >dump Twilight Sparkle
  22. >they date and leave you alone
  23. >it's fairly convoluted, but you don't want to crush her heart right now, she's too mentally unstable
  24.  
  25. >you arrive at the Sparkle residence and knock at the door
  26. >Twi:"who is it?" she tentatively asks
  27. Anon, open up.
  28. >Twi:"it's unlocked" she says in a failed attempt at seduction
  29.  
  30. >you open the door get on the floor everybody walk the dinosaur
  31. >suddenly you notice
  32. >a smell
  33. >you also hear some sniffles and sobs
  34. >you get to Twilight's computer room
  35. >tissues, tissues EVERYWHERE
  36. >there's a dildo on the bed
  37. >it's of a human cock, not a perfect interpretation
  38. >probably got it from fluttershy
  39. >you look over, she's crying while sitting at her computer
  40.  
  41. >the smell hits you, HARD
  42. >it smells heavily of animal musk and fish
  43. Whoa, what's wrong?
  44. >Twi:"the people on the i-internet are s-so MEEEEEAN"
  45. >you were talking about the smell, but whatever
  46. >you wade through the tissues to Twilight Sparkle
  47. >you put your hand on her back
  48. >you feel a shiver go up her spine
  49. >she tears her eyes away from you and looks back at the computer screen, then facedesks
  50. >you look at the screen
  51. >multiple people are trolling the shit out of her DeviantART page
  52.  
  53. >a guy named Yaratzu goes on a huge diatribe about how shitty Twilight's taste in anime is and that she needs to grow a pair and get alpha
  54. >you sorta agree
  55. >a guy named MrTrollXDD says his weeaboo meter is off the charts
  56. >you mumble to yourself
  57. you're on deviantART dude...
  58. >he also posted a DeviantART muro drawing of her sucking a human dick
  59. thats out of line
  60. >there's multiple critiques of her shitty OCs and p0ny drawings
  61. >one guy edits one of them to make it look like he's taking a huge shit
  62. >it's funny as fuck
  63. >Twilight accidentally fed a troll by drawing a muro drawing
  64. >it's of her saying, "what would Naruto do?"
  65.  
  66. >you were so captivated by the trolls that you didn't notice Twilight get up and go to her bed to sob under the sheets
  67.  
  68. >you go to sit down in the computer chair but you notice it's a little wet
  69. >fucking gross
  70. Hey Twilight do you uh... know how to hide posts?
  71. >Twi:"yeah but I don't want people to stop posting on my profile altogether because they think I'm a censoring meanp0ny"
  72. >holy shit, she's NOT like all those other DeviantARTists
  73. Well, you can still delete some of the offensive content while leaving others, giving you the appearance of making peace with differing opinions. Which post is most offensive to you?
  74. >Twi:"t-the one where I'm sucking a-- a--- pickle"
  75. >oh lawd
  76. >you hide that muro drawing (sorry MrTrollXDD)
  77.  
  78. >you turn around
  79. There it's as simple as tha--
  80. >Twilight has her head above the covers now
  81. >her eyes are closed, she's in deep concentration
  82. >she lets out a little moan
  83. >your face when: (http://i.imgur.com/qCK2r.jpg)
  84. Uhh
  85. >she snaps out of it
  86. >Twi:"oh... heh... thanks" she gives a sheepish smile (http://i.imgur.com/7ecOj.gif)
  87. >look_at_this_dirty_bitch.jpg
  88.  
  89. So uh.. I came here to get the gundam season 2 boxset back
  90. >her eyes shoot to her bookshelf where all the dvds are scattered
  91. and to ask you a question
  92. >her eyes shoot back to you
  93.  
  94. Do you want to go out on a date with me?
  95. >her expression goes blanker than before
  96. >her eyes flutter a bit
  97. It's just to see where things go, I know you don't have many friends anymore so I thought it would be good to get out a little, what do you say?
  98. >her eyes avoid your face
  99. >Twi:"I uhh... don't feel too comfortable going out"
  100. >not surprising
  101. >Twi:"could you come over tomorrow and watch anime with me instead?"
  102. Well, I'm not really that into anime
  103. >she seems embarrassed
  104. >you don't want her shitting up the place so you decide on a quick compromise
  105. How about we watch....
  106. >you look to her bookshelf
  107. >you see the Spidermare Collectors Edition DVD
  108. Spidermare?
  109.  
  110. >she smiles
  111. >Twi:"okay, it's a date"
  112.  
  113. >you're walking home to the video store
  114. >you live on the upper floor with rainbro dash as your roommate
  115. >you get home and notice that rainbro reopened the store and added some shit
  116. >there's multiple cardboard standups of Nicolas Cage around the store
  117. >you remember that when your films were being raided from your smartphone that National Treasure was on there
  118. >Nicolas Cage became super mega popular with p0nies
  119. >so much so, that his likeness is ubiquitous in Equestria now (http://i.imgur.com/IMTYv.jpg)
  120. >when p0nies think of humans they either picture Nicolas Cage or you
  121. >Rainbow is a big fan
  122.  
  123. >start walking over to rainbow dash who is behind the counter
  124. >the counter is made for your height so she's flying
  125. >it makes it hard for p0nies to pay for stuff
  126. >you wonder why you get so little business
  127. >as you walk over, you accidentally rustle the jimmies of a Nick Cage standie
  128. >Rainbro looks at you in disgust for knocking over Nick
  129.  
  130. >RD:"where the fuck have you been"
  131. Chill rainbow, there's no customers this time AND I closed the shop. I was just clearing some shit up with Twilight Sparkle.
  132. >RD:"what's the plan?"
  133. Date her and be a shitty boyfriend so she stops crushing on me
  134. >RD:"sounds like the plot to an ero-manga"
  135. How the fuck do you know what that is?
  136. >she blushes
  137. >RD:"uhh, they made a ero-manga of me! cuz I'm a... wonderbolt and they showed it to me at uh- boltcon!"
  138.  
  139. >Rainbow Dash goes to so many conventions, holy shit
  140. >who does she think she is? Scott Ramsoomair?
  141. >you get a thought
  142. Hey bro, they got any anime conventions coming up?
  143. >RD:"yeah, there's one coming up in Canterlot in 4 weeks"
  144. Great, I think I can use this to my advantage. I'll try to find some colt who's as nerdy as her and get them to meet. I'm gonna be a MATCHMAKER Rainbow!
  145. >RD:"MATCHMAKER!"
  146. >brohoof
  147. >...
  148. >"the only reason I knew that there was a con was because feathercon is right next door"
  149. >yeah whatever
  150.  
  151. ~~END PART 3~~
  152.  
  153. Spaghetti Sparkle's version of events:
  154. http://spaghettisparklechan.deviantart.com/journal/lt-3-lt-3-lt-3-291869188