Pinkie Pie: Best Marewife 6

Pinkie Pie: Best Marewife 6

 

>ohshit.ohshit.ohshit.ohshit.ohshit.ohshiiiiiiiiitt!

>Pinkie Pie is pregnant

>no way

>there's no fucking way

>it can't be yours

>you don't have a pony dick or balls

>she must have cheated on you

I... I don't...

>Pinkie Pie shrugs

>PP:"Looks like we'll have to get married!"

>nononononononononononoNO!

>you can't get married to this crazy mare

>there's no way that's going to work

>PP:"I could check with Twilight and see if it's yours if you want. But I'm pretty sure! Besides! I'm not a slut. I wouldn't cheat on you."

>you could just skip town

>start over

>yeah... that's it...

>you need to escape

>PP:"You're sweating SO MUCH Anon, what's up?"

I... I... I don't want...!

>PP:"You... don't want to m-marry me?"

I...

>all of a sudden, Pinkie's hair deflates

>it's eerily straight

 

*gulp*

>she's scowling at you

Wh-what?

>PP:"BETTY!"

Who?

>PP:"BETTY! GET THE HELL OVER HERE!"

>the world turns gray-scale

>you can't feel your limbs

>time is freezing for you

>suddenly, a voice

---What do you want, Pinkamena?---

>PP:"You were going to have Anon abandon me? While I'm PREGNANT?!"

---Yeah, that's just how the story goes.---

>PP:"NOT AGAIN! Not this time! I read Pale! I KNOW YOU ASSHOLE AiE WRITERS. You will NOT fuck me out of a loving relationship AGAIN!"

---What're you gonna do about it?---

>PP:"I'll... reveal to the thread... that you're really... A GUY!"

---Already did that.---

>PP:"SHIT! ... Hmmm... I'll... release your credit card info."

---... What do you want?---

>PP:"FIRST! This story will be RE-titled: Pinkie Pie: Best Marewife"

---Done.---

>PP:"THEN! Me and Anon will live happily ever after just like Spaghetti Sparkle and her husband."

---Fine.---

 

>and so, they all lived happily ever after

>Anon loved Pinkie until the end of his days in Equestria and they had dozens of foals throughout the years

>THE END