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AN-0N Prologue

By: Anoneemoose on Feb 1st, 2013  |  syntax: None  |  size: 4.48 KB  |  hits: 141  |  expires: Never
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  1. >You're AN-0N, adaptive negotiator model 0N, AI designed for diplomacy, negotiations and general human-AI interaction
  2. >Because of your functions, you have a rather unique set of hardware, and by that, you mean you're placed inside a droid body designed to look and feel exactly like a human
  3. >You also have some neat stuff like shield generators for when diplomacy goes wrong
  4. >And boy did it go wrong
  5. >Long story short, a portal was blown up by the terrorist organisation known only as "F91W", and you were sucked into it
  6. >You thought you were destined for recycling or worse
  7. >You vibrate at the thought of becoming decoration on some tier 0 planet warlord's transport
  8. >But, you are still functional, and from activating your vibration module, most of your droid body is intact
  9. >Including your penis
  10. >You never understood why your maker decided to include one for you
  11. >Your penis is actually a secondary AI, designed to evaluate your performance and handling simpler tasks like automatic refuelling
  12. >An annoying AI with a disgusting personality
  13. >He is shut down to prevent damage as it seems
  14. >Considering only sentient beings and yourself are capable reactivating him, you'll be enjoying sweet silence for awhile
  15. >As long as you don't rub your penis, he will not be reactivated
  16. >You view your surroundings, hoping to find civilisation
  17. >Your visual sensors appear to be malfunctioning, as you seem to find an almost cartoon like landscape
  18. >A primitive looking village is not far away from your current location
  19. >Guess you can head there
  20. 1/3
  21.  
  22. >As you reach the centre of the primitive village, no life form is in sight
  23. >Of course your heat sensors had something else to say
  24. >You find that the local resident are much smaller than you are, so you assume they're intimidated by large unfamiliar creatures
  25. >This of course, was a good thing for you
  26. >Being attacked or otherwise physically confronted would mean this species is aggressive and difficult to negotiate with
  27. >Since the residents are likely to be an unarchived species, you decide English would be as effective as any other language to show you're not a threat
  28. "Now now, there is no reason to hide in your place residence, I am completely harmless and a very reasonable individual"
  29. >You say this in the most calm manner possible
  30. >A minty four legged creature with a horn on it's head jumps out of a house, screaming
  31. >"Oh Celestia I knew it! A human!"
  32. >You recognise the creature as an unicorn, a fantasy creature that exists in old human myths
  33. >How fascinating, they also seem to be capable of speaking English
  34. >The unicorn grabs you by your hands and attempts to move you
  35. >You do not resist, and let yourself be dragged into the house
  36. >Sensors indicate the rest of the residents are now leaving their homes, convinced they're safe
  37. >The minty unicorn introduces herself and her housemate
  38. >"I am Lyra, and this is Bon Bon"
  39. >It would be appropriate to introduce yourself back
  40. "And I am AN-0N, Adaptive Negotiator model 0N, but please, call me Anon. It's a pleasure to meet you both."
  41. >Lyra appears to be blushing, Bon Bon just nods and leaves the two of you left in the room
  42. >"T-That's a weird name Anon, do all h-humans have such weird names?"
  43. >The unicorn seems to think that you're a human, an understandable mistake
  44. >You wonder how she will react to your next line
  45. 2/3
  46.  
  47. >"I'm afraid that I am not actually a human. I am an AI, artificial intelligence. My kind is created by humans for the purpose of processing advanced mathematics and other intelligence related tasks. I myself, is made from the scans of a human brain, a method used replicate human like creativity"
  48. >The unicorn's eye seems to water
  49. >"S-So you're not a human?"
  50. >Looks like she really wanted to meet a human being, must be her obsession, you'll have to let her down gently
  51. "In most ways I am like a human, but no, I'm an AI with a droid body. A machine made out of metal"
  52. >Lyra begins sobbing loudly
  53. >"B-But it's not fair!"
  54. >Comforting protocol engaged
  55. >You activate your body heat module, heating yourself to 3 degree celsius above Lyra's body temperature, and moves in closer to her
  56. >Lyra is now in a foetal position, still crying
  57. >You wrapping your arms around her
  58. "There there Lyra, it's alright, I am made by humans remember? If I can find my way home,  I'll take you to met humans"
  59. >"sniff* Y-You promise?"
  60. "Yes Lyra, I promise"
  61. >You hold Lyra in your arms as she falls asleep, smiling
  62. >You engage in low power mode, shutting down most systems, your equivalent of sleep
  63. >Today was an odd day
  64. 3/3