Title: the tired anon 1 Author: alidan Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/QGw9ekXZ First Edit: Thursday 13th of September 2012 10:11:28 AM CDT Last Edit: Thursday 13th of September 2012 10:11:28 AM CDT day 1 in equestria   >be anon >be very VERY angry anon >see you woke up in the everfree forest, >wandered out >got chased by candy ponies >befriended said ponies >and played the purple ones favorite game of 20 questions for 13 hours >not bad, you learn shit, they learn shit >find out that everfree isnt as dangerous as everyone things, mostly due to you running out of questions and asking about where you woke up >turns out most animals that dont talk, still understand you >also turns out, most of them will just try to beat the shit out of you, and not go for the kill >lastly, find out that there are no true carnivores in equestria. >sure meat isnt common, but its also not hard to come by, though you will get some looks eating it >but i fucking digress. >you are basically nocturnal due to lifestyle on earth >you are more awake at night than the day >so you hunker down, and read some books... >apparently their language is based on the same one yours is, they just use different symbols for different sounds, less retarded than your grammer system >again i digress... >you decide to go to sleep around the cack of dawn, and mange to actually fall asleep a few hours latter. >1 hour >1 CUNTING HOUR >apparently this purple bitch had a thing against you sleeping comfortably, and wants to change your "nocturnal ways" >dumb bitch left you alone. >and you are fucking pissed >you decide to leave, if that purple monster comes back, well... fuck me no sleep time at all. >you go to leave >"anon, i don't know about that, i was put in charge of watching you" >all you can respond with is the lowest most annoyed growl you can muster, and this puple lizard shut the fuck up right than and there   >outside of the housebrery, you get a fair amount of attention, grated they aren't running as screaming like yesterday, but you still scare the piss out of most of them >oh, lets not forget, before that portal sucked your ass here, you were up for 23 hours straight. >you can now tack on another 18 hours to that, and 1 piss ass hour of sleep... >your face doesn't scream friendly on the best days >as tired and pissed as you are, is sure as fuck isn't doing you any favors. >you scan the crowd for the least scared pony, and this one be mint green yo >she is actually walking up to you. >you attempt to not sound pissed, and try to remove the look from your face... >that plan failed minty, you have and clue where i can hide that nobody will fucking wake me up? >not paying attention, you snap your fingers in her face... >well shit, light comes out when you do it here... >or you are so fucking tired you are starting to hallucinate and see sound... >must fucking sleep >pony snaps the fuck out of her trance >"way, what" you have ANY, clue where I, can hide that NO, body will fucking WAKE, me up? >if she wasn't scared before, its starting to show now >"the forrest there... no one goes in there unless they absolutely have to" thank you minty green awesome... fuck it cant think anymore... bye >you don't notice her enthusiastic wave...   >45 minutes later, you see the entrance to that forrest sleep... come take me away... >"um... anon... what are you... here... .... for" >while she is saying that, you are slowly turning around, looking pissed that anything is alive, if you had any idea... you would be proud to know you preformed a perfect "stare"   >needless to say, you are really fucking out of it, though not that flutter would know >5 minutes, you didn't kill her, that's good, but she hasn't moved, >you havent blinked >you dont think she did either >you turn around, and head in   be fluttershy >holy shit >why couldnt i move >how the fuck did he manage to pull that off >is that what the "Stare" is like? >no... this was more potent... >but by how much >oh god... im a monster... >tears well up in your eyes... you finished feeding the animals... you have nothing to do for a while... >you decide to be extra nice to the chickens for now...   be anon   >you are lost... and you don't fucking care right now. >all you want is a dark area, and a epic sleep >thats... FUCKING... IT >so, you notice a cave... >shit be dark >you enter >shit also be cold >you dig up some dirt, and make a pillow. >this is where you sleep   10 minutes later >FUCKING SLEEP >... >plan isn't working out all that well. >you cant sleep >fucking hate being that tired... >close eyes... >here growl >FUCK YOU STOMACH I WANT SLEEP MORE THAN YOU NEED FOOD >wasn't me boss >open eyes >wow that's a big cat... shut the FUCK up i want to GOD damn sleep >wow... did it just back up a bit... well th- >"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOARRRRRRRR > remember shit in the forest will not try to kill you, but may mame... i'm going to have to try to fight you... wont i... >get up, crack knuckles, see scorpion tail jesus... are you a manticore? ... >god this world is awesome... >the damn thing takes your reverence for the worlds awesome, and lunges for an attack >wow... is this bullet time... > adrenalin in this world must react differently... awesome   >lets see here, what did boxing and boxing video games teach you... >duck in >cross counter >try to hit jaw to rock mother fuckers >with bullet time, this is honestly a piece of cake. >use this motherfuckers momentem against him   crack   >well that was a hell of a noise >finger check   fwlmp   >huh... >did i ko the mother fucker... >... >no... >but he definally is messed up >sell shit... lets try something hay... you... manticore... you ok > groggy as fuck... he checks his jaw as best he can. >"rar" >low roar... the fuck is that look at me >got its attention nod for yes, shake for no >it nods >cool well... you are strong, i dont want to fuck you up, what do you say to being friends? >you never break eyecontact same head movements as before >it things and nods awesome... you need a name, something i can call you... how about... ... fluffles a cute name for a deceptivly scary creature... you like it >you don't know why, but it nods good, now if you cant tell, i was about to go to sleep till you so rudely got me the fuck up... >it cringes a bit to repay me, you will act as a pillow and personal heater >it strangely complies... you wonder if showing domanance had anything to do with it, of ig this cat was just that cool... i love big kitties. >head by mane, feel great, pet it a bit >hear that purr >sound asleep im seconds   you are twilight sparkle   >and that thing ran off spike why did you let him go >"he scared me... that low growl... i didnt want to mess with that." > that's a bit concerning... >no time for that now, must find anon before he gets hurt... or lost... or gets studdied by someone else but me