- ************************
- NOTICE
- lower down is a grammar corrected version
- even though it is over all better, when i dictated with dragon it got words wrong that i didn't catch, which also made them grammar correct it wrong in some places... when i feel like dicking around with it, ill fix the grammar corrected one to better fit what it should be, the non grammar correct isn't getting touched.
- ************************
- >You are anonymous
- >and you are one rich mother fucker
- >about four years ago you won the lottery
- >$63 million to be exact
- >to be honest you are happy at the time
- >and right now
- >well still fucking happy
- >but because when you one them money
- >everybody in your family
- >every friend you had
- >every person who thought you old them in God damn thing came to the door asking for their share
- >so you cut ties completely with your family
- >you cut ties completely with your friends
- >and you made damn sure to make your presence unknown anybody who wants knew you
- >you went so far see them legally change your name the most unsuspicious thing you could possibly >think of
- >anonymous
- >well to be exact
- >anonymous thee unknown
- >now ever since you were a kid you've always like animals
- >but there's one animal that you've always wanted to have
- >just never had the space for
- >so about 3 1/2 years ago
- >you got a horse
- >you being the creative mother fucker that you are
- >name that after character in a videogame that you happen to like
- >epona
- >God dammit did you love Zelda
- >that was fun having a horse to
- >you had a mansion
- >you had a stable
- >you had a well-stocked library
- >and with some money left over you bought damn near every piece of entertainment you possibly >could
- >and when you couldn't get your hands on legally you pirated
- >home theater room
- >newest consoles
- >a computer with four Titans
- >and a computer with 4 7990's
- >best of both worlds depending on which gameplay better on what
- >and thanks to your big home and land you magic put up solar panels in so many places you are >basically off the grid
- >so long as you had anon cloudy day and the batteries charged
- >you only One room completely powered in with your seating done through electrical it was really like >you're living in one room but you had the solar panels of a whole neighborhood
- >outside of taking care of Epona your days consisted mostly of playing video games
- >watching some classic and new movies
- >catching up on old TV shows
- >and taking a ride on Epona every now and then
- >right now you're taking a ride along your property
- >Epona is going about as fast as she can
- >but all that kind of goes the hell
- >a big bright white light envelops you and your entire estate
- >and you are fucking out
- - - -
- >you don't exactly know when you came to
- >you where wear a watch
- >since you have never had anything to do you never really saw much use in owning one
- >not that you didn't think the grand complication to be pretty interesting to own
- >ahhh you're getting off on a tangent
- “the fuck happened”
- >“I have no idea”
- >okay someone responded,
- >your properties a good 3 miles away from any form of civilization
- >your closest neighbor is at least 2 miles away
- >someone's trespassing
- >so you look around
- >you see the woods that wasn't there before
- >vibrantly colorful at that
- >but you don't see another person
- “who said that”
- >“I did”
- >again you look around
- >“wait you can understand me now”
- >and then you see it
- “a pony”
- >“there are pony anymore I'm a horse”
- >it starts the standup
- >you do the same
- >“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
- >okay this thing is really loud
- >“why the hell I short”
- >you don't get an answer for that
- “who and what the hell are you”
- >you might be in the back of your mind but you don't thinking it yet
- >you don't want to believe that it's possible
- >but could be
- >and that's what kind of scares you
- >“I'm Epona, a horse... pony... whatever and your my master don't you remember that, wait you fell off me did you hit your head hard?”
- >It goes into apologizing making you fall off
- >saying the bright lights scared
- >you don't know what to make of the situation right now
- >one thing is for sure though
- >you hit your head very fucking hard
- >and that's why you hear another set of voices
- >“come on girls, the light came from this direction”
- >“I see something twilight, a big house in a large cleared out area”
- >who the hell are they and why the hell are they coming your property
- >you look towards the forest where the voices are coming from
- >seriously how the hell did that forest get there
- >anyways
- >you see a purple pony with a horn
- >in the blue one with wings
- >and then you see green
- >your nose hurts
- >thank you trying to faint
- >I think you're succeeding
- >“what is i...”
- >And with that you're out
- *********************************
- someone grammar corrected it so here
- *********************************
- >You are Anonymous .
- >And you are one rich motherfucker.
- >About four years ago you won the lottery.
- >$63 million to be exact
- >You were happy at the time.
- >And right now?
- >Well, still fucking happy.
- >But when you won the money, everybody in your family, every friend you had, every person who thought you owed them one Goddamned thing came to the door asking for their share.
- >So you cut ties completely with your family.
- >You cut ties completely with your friends.
- >And you made damn sure to make your presence unknown anybody who wanted to know you.
- >You went so far as to legally change your name to the most inconspicuous thing you could possibly think of...
- >Anonymous
- >Anonymous Unknown to be exact.
- >Now, ever since you were a kid you've always liked animals.
- >But there's one animal that you've always wanted to have but never had the space for.
- >So about 3 1/2 years ago you got a horse.
- >Being the creative motherfucker that you are, you name it after a character in a vidyagaem that you happen to like.
- >Epona
- >God damn do you love Zelda.
- >That game was so dicking good.
- >It was fun having a horse too.
- >You had a mansion.
- >You had a stable.
- >You had a well-stocked library.
- >And with some money left over you bought damn near every piece of entertainment you possibly could.
- >Home theater room? Check.
- >Newest consoles? Check.
- >A computer with four Titans? Check.
- >A computer with 4 7990's? Check
- >Best of both worlds depending on which game played better on what
- >Thanks to your big home and huge amount of land you are able to put up solar panels in so many places you are basically off the grid.
- >Well, so long as you had no cloudy days and the batteries were charged.
- >you only One room completely powered in with your seating done through electrical it was really like you're living in one room but you had the solar panels of a whole neighborhood
- >Other than taking care of Epona, your days mostly consisted of playing video games, watching some movies, catching up on old TV shows.
- >Right now you're riding Epona along your property.
- >Epona is going about as fast as she can.
- >But all that kind of goes the hell.
- >A bright white light envelops you.
- >And you are fucking out.
- - - -
- >You don't exactly know when you came to.
- >Since you have never had anything to do you never really saw much use in owning a watch.
- >Not that you didn't think the grand complication to be pretty interesting to own
- >...You're getting off on a tangent
- “ Ughh, the fuck happened?”
- >“I have no idea."
- >Okay, so someone responded.
- >There are two things wrong with that:
- >1) Your property's a good 4 miles away from any form of civilization.
- >2) Your closest neighbor lives 2 miles away.
- >Someone is trespassing.
- >You look around.
- >you see a forest that wasn't there before.
- >A vibrantly colored forest at that.
- >You don't see another person though.
- “Who said that?”
- >“I did.”
- >Again you look around.
- >“Wait, you can understand me now?”
- >And then you see it.
- “A pony?”
- >“There are no ponies here, I'm a horse.”
- >It starts to stand up.
- >You do the same.
- >“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
- >Holy fuck, this thing is loud!
- >“Why the hell am I short!?”
- >You don't have an answer to that.
- >You do, however, have a question.
- “Who and what the hell are you?”
- >An answer starts forming in the back of your mind.
- >You don't want to believe that it's possible.
- >Could it be?
- >“I'm Epona, a horse... pony... whatever, and you are my master. Don't you remember that? Or did you hit your head... some... where. Crap.”
- >It starts apologizing profusely for making you fall off, saying the bright lights scared it.
- >You don't know what to make of the whole situation right now.
- >One thing is for sure though.
- >You hit your head very fucking hard.
- >That's probably why you're hearing another set of voices.
- >“Come on girls, the light came from this direction!”
- >“I see something Twilight, a big house in a large clearing!”
- >Who the hell are they, and why the hell are they coming on to your property?
- >You look towards the forest where the voices are coming from.
- >(Seriously, how the hell did that forest get there?)
- >Emerging from it, you see a purple pony with a horn, a blue one with wings and-
- >Your nose hurts.
- >You think you're seeing a bit of green too.
- >Are you fainting?
- >Fuck
- >“What is i...”
- >And with that you're out.
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