Southern Anon in Equestria 5 - Elementally, Watson

>You awaken on Fluttershy's sofa, but hold your eyes closed

>It's not often you get to just lay and think.

>You notice the slight brightness of the room, and assume it's early morning

>You ponder a moment, trying to figure up just how long you've been here

>You come to a conclusion

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MycyQKZSg2M

>This is day 12 in Equestria for you

>You wonder how your family and friends are taking your disappearance

>You'd only planned about a week of camping and exploring the woods

>And you're over that by 9 days now

>They're probably all out combing that mess of a mountain forest searching for you

>Only to never turn up anything besides a couple of abandoned campsites

>They'll likely give up the search soon, and just assumed you'd become bear food

>They were fairly common up in the Smokey's, afterall

 

>You'd managed to live without necessary provisions by searching for edible plants and fungi

>You had packed a box of matches, because you weren't a fucking boy scout who could start a fire with a couple sticks and some friction

>Not that you'd never tried, you were well known for your amazement at fire and how it could come into being from nothing

>You had a bowie knife in you backpack, but it was more for defense than actual hunting

>Hunting wouldn't have been an effective use of resources anyway, seeing as you never could stomach the 'cleaning' of the corpse

>You'd have just chucked whatever you'd managed to eat prior, and that would have just quickened both starvation dehydration

>You did happen upon a stream, and that was a life saver of it's own right

>it allowed you to collect water, and gave you chance to gig a couple of frogs

>The meat on them did taste surprisingly like chicken.

 

>You realize you're starting to drift back to sleep

>You kind of wanted not to do that

>You notice that the brightness has faded behind your closed eyelids

>You smell the overly saccharine scent of cotton candy

>And you can barely make out the sound of something... breathing

>You slowy open your eyes and...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2P5qbcRAXVk

>OHDEARCHRISTTHATSALOTOFPINK

>You keep your composure, but quirk an eyebrow

>This might be a friend of Fluttershy's

>You'll give them a chance before you start tossing haymakers

"Who are you and why are you in my face?"

>She gives a long, drawn out gasp, and then she's off speaking a thousand miles a microsecond

>"OHMYGOSHITCANTALK!Hi,I'mPinkiePie!Youmustbethat 'hue man' thatFluttershytoldusaboutyesterday.That'skindafunny,becauseyoudon'tseemcolorfulenoughtobecalleda 'hue man', butthat'snotimportant!You'renewinPonyville,andIknoweveryp0nyinPonyvillebecauseeveryp0nyinPonyvilleismyfriend!ThatmeansthatYOU'REmyfriendtoo.HeyweshouldthrowyouawelcometoPonyvilleparty!It'llbesuperfun,withdrinks,andpartygames,andcake,andmuffins,andpresents!Wouldn'tthatjustbesuperduperultrafantasticallyfun?!

>nope, it's too early for this shit

 

>It's a good thing you had a hyperactive little cousin growing up

>You, sadly, understood every word that was just spewed at you by this 'Pinkie Pie'

>Wait, didn't Applejack mention a 'Pinkie' the other day?

>Yeah, I'm pretty sure she did

>Think it's the same one brain?

>Could be, ask you idiot.

>You sit yourself upright on the sofa you were laying on

"Pinkie, You wouldn't happen ta be one o' Applejack's and Fluttershy's friends, would ya?"

>"Ooh, OOH! Yeah, but how did you know!? Are you a psychic?!"

"Nah, ah ain't no psychic. Applejack jest kinda mentioned ya after we had a little scuffle yesterday. She's a bit quick to act, but she means well. So what was that about a party?"

>Her eyes light up

>Dear god, you're asking all the wrong questions on purpose, aren't you brain?

>fuckyouidowhatiwant

>"Oh yeah, a party! I throw a party for every new p0ny in P0nyville, so they can get to meet everyp0ny in town in fell swoop, and make friends, and not have to feel like they don't belong! I do my best to make everyp0ny in P0nyville happy, because that's what makes me happy! And nop0ny throws a party like me in ALL of Equestria!"

 

>"Hey Pinkie, hurry it up in there! I've gotta start getting the clouds together for the shower we're supposed have later today!"

>You hear a slightly gruff, but still feminine voice coming from outside

>"Okie-dokie-lokie! He only woke up a minute ago, Dashie! Tell the girls we'll be out in just a moment!"

>"Ugh, fine..."

>She turns back to face you, a smile on her face so large you'd think it'd dislocate her jaw if it went any wider

>"So would you like a 'Welcome to Ponyville' party? I just know EVERY pony in Ponyville would be there!."

>You whole heartedly believe that statement

"Ah'd love a party, Pinkie, but how's about we hold off on that fer a lil' while, huh? Ah'm supposed to meet all the rest o' Fluttershy's friends today firstly, and secondly, ah don't even rightly know how long ah'm gonna be here. Ah'm not from this world."

>"Ooh, so you're an alien?"

>her face is much more inquisitive now, but she's still beaming at y-

>Where did that deerstalker and cob-pipe come from?

>M-

>NO, GOD DAMMIT, BRAIN, THIS IS AN EARTHPONY!

>FUCK

>YOU

 

>Okay, nipping this in the bud right fucking now

"Pinkie, ah'm sure ya've got a buncha questions, but how's about we mosey on outside and meet yer other friends first?  Ah'm sure they have a ton of questions too, and Ah absolutely hate repeatin' mahself if ah can help it."

>You stand and start to head out the door, Pinkie following you

>You open the front door, and step out to see who all is there

>You quickly spot Fluttershy, her being the one you're most familiar with at the moment.

>You then notice Applejacks orange coat and stetson

>You also see a cyan pegasus with a rainbow mane and tail

>A white unicorn with purple curls

>And a purple unicorn, who looks to be levitating a notepad and...Quill?

>She seems to be talking to Fluttershy and Applejack, and taking notes of what they tell her

>You were joking about writing everything down to save time

>Apparently this little filly isn't

>"Okay girls, here he is!"

>Dammit, Pinkie

>All the other ponies turn to face you

>the purple one, still levitating her quill and pad just starts walking towards you

>You begin to brace for the impending verbal question assault.