Title:           Pretty As A Peacock
Author:          Uhnonimuss
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/Tqu5bS3b
First Edit:      Saturday 8th of August 2015 08:39:51 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 8th of August 2015 08:39:51 PM CDT

>See Peacock pone
>So graceful, so beautiful
>You have to ask her out
>Summon all of your courage as you approach
"Hey, my name's Anon and I, well... I noticed you across the way and you just looked so beautiful... I had to come over and say 'Hello', and I was wondering if there's a chance I could get to know you better, maybe over a cup of coffee?"
>She looks you up and down, and then shows a smile as she makes eye contact
>"Sure, that sounds wonderful! I'm busy right now, be can meet in that little bistro around the corner in an hour. Sound good?"
"Sounds fabulous! I'll be there!"
>"Well, I guess I'll see you then, stud. Ciao!"
>You take a moment to stare at her shapely rump as she trots away
>This may be you luckiest day since landing in Equestria
>You've just met the prettiest birdpone in the kingdom
>Oh, she looks so perfect
>Those beautiful eyes
>That incredible spotted pattern on her mane and tail
>Her deep, almost masculine voice
>Her prominent Adam's app-
>Wait, what?
>In an instant, it hits you
>They're called peaCOCKs and peaHENs for a reason
>You have a coffee date with a dude...
>
>You should be disgusted with yourself, but man...
>DAT FLANK DOE
>Having coffee with some gorgeous dude isn't going to hurt anyone
>And hey, you might learn something new about yourself today