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Cult of Anon, the offering

By: Tsarroman on May 28th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 1.81 KB  |  hits: 155  |  expires: Never
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  1. > wake up in the morning
  2. > hear some sort of chanting
  3. > moan in my half slumber
  4. Dammit.....
  5. > "the great one arises!"
  6. > "Fetch the offerings!"
  7. > the two ponies leave, only to return a few moments later with a plate of meat and a glass of what looks to be tomato juice
  8. > I am reasonably skeptical
  9. Where did you get this meat?
  10. > "A loyal subject donated it to our cause!"
  11. > "Yes, he wanted to repent for a past misdeed"
  12. So long as the meat is normal
  13. > start eating, it's got a consistency like beef
  14. > Fluttershy and Lyra look on with joy as I devour the meal
  15. > I make to take a swig of the tomato juice and a rather metallic smell hits my nose
  16. > a quick touch of the tongue confirms my fears
  17. This is blood
  18. > "The blood of the one who repented"
  19. > "That way you accept his offering!"
  20. > do an immediate spit take
  21. > Lyra calls for Big Mac
  22. please tell me you didn't
  23. > "Eeeyup"
  24. > Big mac walks into the room, limping significantly
  25. What did you do, that you wanted to repent?
  26. > "Made fun o' these two"
  27. and so you gave your blood?
  28. > he turns to the side to reveal a large gash from his flank
  29. Oh....oh god
  30. > "Do ya' fergive me master?"
  31. Don't tell me I ate you?
  32. > he nods his head yes
  33. > I run to the toilet and heave up what I had eaten
  34. > The three follow me to the bathroom
  35. > I hear Big Mac weeping, the other two consoling him
  36. > "Don't give up hope, he'll forgive you soon"
  37. > "Just keep trying, he'll come around"
  38. > when I'm done, I come out of the bathroom, and all three stare at me intensely
  39. > They then begin to chant, begging for my forgiveness
  40. > I walk around them, ignoring their chants
  41. > before lunch, Big Mac is passes out on the floor, and I rush him to the hospital
  42. > I am later informed that would be an indicator that I have forgiven him, and that he is now a dedicated member of the cult of Anon
  43. > fuck
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