Title:           Birds and Bees
Author:          TheScooter
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/fiCPpvdT
First Edit:      Tuesday 20th of March 2012 10:39:54 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Tuesday 20th of March 2012 10:39:54 AM CDT

>Woo! Sleep over!
>You have the rest of the Crusaders running around. Being noisy and all around adorable.
>You do your best to let them be and... OH FUCK YOU’RE TIED UP!
>You try to give a manly cry for help.
>It doesn’t exactly work out like that.
>What the hell’s going on?
>You’re on the ground and quickly hog tied.
>Save me Jeebus!
>Something’s on your back SOMETHING’S ON YOUR BACK!
>”I did it!” Wait, you recognize that drawl...
>You try to look back, “Applebloom, please explain yourself.”
>She beams her smile down upon you. “Applejack sahs my special talent maht be human wranglin’”
>You close your eyes and count to ten. Applejack training them young huh?
>You try looking back at her again. “Do you have your mark?”
>She shuffles a bit on your back then you hear her dejectedly “No.”
>”Then please untie me dear.”
 
>You’re free and spring to your feet. Sufficed to say, you’re not exactly pleased.
>But Applebloom gives you those doe eyes and apologizes.
>”Have you ever tried p0ny wrangling?” You ask with an arched eyebrow.
>She catches on quick and bounds off to another room with rope in tow.
>Moments later shrieks of protest followed by laughter.
>You manage to get some reading done while the girls occupy themselves by wrecking your stuff.
>Reading your book harder isn’t helping at all.
>You hear them scamper and stop in front you.
>”What is it girls?” You ask, not looking up from your book.
>A moment of silence followed by the unmistakable sound of a hoof to the side.
>Scootaloo grunts and speaks up “Umm... dad, where do people come from?”
>Oh
>My
>GOD!
 
>Shit, what do you say?
>What do you do?
>The talk.... NOW?
>But she’s so young! She’s still your sweet innocent Scoots!
>That Applebloom is a bad influence... wait, but she’s asking too.
>Obviously Applejack hasn’t told her. If she had, you’d have probably been on your way to Rapetown when she hogtied you.
>Ok, what would your friends do?
>Rarity: Too disgusted to say anything.
>Twilight: Read them a book
>Fluttershy: ….Nope
>Rainbro: Tell them like it is most likely while thrusting in the air.
>Pinkie: Throw a party.
>Actually, you hate to say it, but Applejack may be the best one to emulate.
>Honesty. You know she would tell Applebloom the truth. Better to hear it from a trusted source then through experimentation with those obviously mentally challenged colts in her class.
>You sigh and lean in. “When a man and a woman love each other, they have sex....”
Scootaloo screams at you “DAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!! We just wanted to know about the place you came from!”
>The three look at each other and start laughing at the misunderstanding, you can’t help but join them.