YOLO

>Day Equestrian Idol in where else but Equestria

>You are Anonymous, and its the day of auditions.

>You were just talking about random shit with Twilight regarding entertainment back home, and the show just kinda came up.

>They had talent shows here, but the idea of having a large one to draw in a large number of scouts and managers into one place escaped them.

>And in almost no time word got out about it as would be stars began packing up and heading for the small town of Ponyville.

>Ponies from all over have come to show how good they are.

>And just like back home, most of them are probably shit.

>But its not about them being good, its about how much you can laugh at those poor bastards making fools of themselves.

>Unfortunately, Twilight thought it would be a good idea that you should be a part of it.

>And Celestia agreed.

>You tried talking your way out of it, but they weren't having it.

>They wanted to see what human songs were like, and they thought that it might help you get more connected with the ponies if you participated.

>So here you are, waiting backstage for your turn at making an ass out of yourself.

>Judging by the number of ponies coming back  crying their eyes out, there must be at least one dick judge out there.

>That's just wonderful.

>A roar of applause comes from the front as Sweet Cream comes strutting backstage with the smuggest of grins, clearly proud of herself.

>If the crowd is anything to go by, she has reason to be.

>"Anonymous, you're up!"

>Welp, time to pay the piper.

>You figure that if you're going down, you might as well have fun with it.

>Walking onto the stage, the sight of more ponies than you thought could possibly fit in the small town look at you, with the three judges front and center.

>Mayor Mare, Sapphire Shores, and Blueblood, with the three princesses off to the side in a VIP box.

>From what you heard about Blueblood, he's probably the asshole.

>Blueblood looks right at you, a jovial expression on his face.

>"Okay Anon, just relax and give us your best. I'm sure we're all anxious to hear what humans have to offer."

>Well , that was pretty nice, maybe he wasn't as bad a guy as you heard.

>Maybe it was Sapphire. As a professional she probably didn't care for listening to the screeching of dying animals.

>"Yeah, just have fun with it and ignore the neighsayers."

>Or maybe not. Maybe there was no bad judge? Ponies did tend to blow things out of proportion, and you've talked with Mayor Mare before and she's pretty nice.

>"At the least he can't be as bad as some of the previous contestants. I swear, I've heard timberwolf mating calls that sounded better than that. Anon, I'd like to keep my eardrums intact, so if you plan to foul up the stage, please pick something short."

>She looks at you with a bored and somewhat disinterested expression.

>You think you know someone. Oh well, might as well go for it, what do you have to lose?

>Besides your dignity that is.

"Ok, well, here I go."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5Otla5157c

>When you finish, the crowd just looks at you, eyes wide and mouths agape.

>Not a sound is made by anyone.

>At least for a moment, then the dams break.

>Ponies scream in abject terror as they all start running and scattering.

>The ones who live in town rushing for their homes and begin boarding up their doors and windows.

>Ponies dart away from Derpy as though she has the plague, and by the way she's acting, you think she's trying to avoid herself, too.

>It starts getting dark as the sun begins to lower, which is odd since its the middle of the day.

>A glance over to the princess section shows Celestia being yelled at by her peers to bring the sun down.

>Blankets, sweaters, and all matter of cloth is being thrown from homes.

>A look over to Quills and Sofas, you see someone setting the whole damn building on fire as a ring of ponies chant "BURN THE MURDERERS!"

>The madness continues for the night as ponies pretty much empty out their homes, and those from other places hoof it home, too scared to take the train.

"What...the...fuck..."

>You slowly walk through the lifeless, littered streets.

>Surely you weren't THAT bad?

>Were you?

>Maybe a talk with Twilight would help make sense of things.

>After all, she's a reasonable pony.

>A few minutes of stepping over furniture and going the long way around the burning store, you reach the treebrary.

>It looks to be boarded up as well, and quite neatly and efficiently to boot.

>Guess whatever caused everyone to panic got her too.

>Nice to know she still stays organized even in a presumed crisis.

"Twilight! Open the door! What the hell just happened out there?!"

>You scream and bang on the door trying to get the unicorn's attention.

>"Go away Anon, I'm not ready to die!"

>Die? What could she be talkin-

>The song.

>You thought you had seen crazy with the ponies before, but this was another level.

>They actually took your song serious?

>Fucking crazy ponies.

"Twilight! It's just a song for laughs, you don't need to worry so much. I mean come on, think about for a minute!"

>You can't hear anything on the other side of the thick door. Good, maybe she'll realize how retarded this whole thing was.

>And before another thought goes through your mind, the scenery changes as you find yourself on your ass inside Twilight's house.

>Fucking magic.

>"You're right Anon! After thinking about it, I was being ridiculous."

"Thank you! Now we can go out and tell ever-"

>She cuts you off.

>"I was wrong about leaving you out there. You're the one who brought all these dangers to our attention! If anyone can increase survival, its you!

>So much for being the smart one.

>"Anon, I'll do whatever it takes! Teach me your ways!"

>That's enough of this insanity, you're gonna sit her down and-

>Wait, anything?

>"Anything." She looks at your fiercely, determination and resolve strong in her voice and eyes.

>Maybe you can let this play out a little longer.

"You're right Twi, let's go up to the bedroom for the first lesson."

>"Why? There's nothing up there."

>She must've thrown away her bed. Or magic'd it away or something.

>You shrug as you continue leading her up the steps.

"Still counts."

>Today was a "I Just Had Sex" kind of day.