- >life was good
- >you had the fastest internet connection on the block
- >you had your bitchin gaming rig
- >you had a folder dedicated to the 4chan master race
- >you had your buddies online
- >life was good
- >brain: hey bro you should go outside
- >fuck off brain, im killing deathwing
- >brain: brain is bored, brain requires sunlight, brain wants to go outside or brain will give you autism
- >fine brain lets go outside
- >you walk outside and instantly learn from your mistake
- >bright ass sunlight
- >bugs fucking everywhere
- >and worst of all
- >people
- >you walk back inside and sit your happy ass back down at your computer
- >brain: you were right, lets never do that again unless we need more beer
- >it ended up being another long sleepless night at your computer alternating between WoW and the internet
- >and of course, stopping in the middle of the night for a fap break
- >brain: you need to get laid
- >you need to...
- >you got me there
- >you finally go to bed at 2 in the morning
- >it was a friday night, so you didnt have to be at work the next day
- >you collapse into your bed and fall asleep
- >
- >
- >
- >you wake up with the most unusual sensation
- >there was no unbearable cold from your ceiling fan
- >there were no sheets tangled all around you
- >there was no soft bed
- >you begin to feel around, not wanting to open your eyes
- >what the fuck am i lying in?
- >is this...
- >grass?
- >you open your eyes
- >oh dear sweet baby jesus
- >the sun was pouring acid onto your eyes
- >fuckshitcunttittiesgoddammit
- >you rub your eyes and wait for them to adjust
- >then you take in the scenery
- >you were lying down on a patch of grass in the middle of a forest
- damniggers.jpg
- >you rise to your feet
- >where the fuck am i?
- >the closest forest to your house was 2 miles away, and even that one wasnt as nice as this one
- >this one had leaves
- >and sunlight
- >the one you knew had hobos and an aura of death
- >it was kinda nice to be in a place thats so tranquil
- >then you hear an ear raping scream from behind you
- >you turn to face the noise only to see a yellow and pink blur going away from you
- allofmywut.png
- >well its no use standing here
- >might as well try and get to somekind of civilization
- >bear grylls mode: [ENABLED] DISABLED
- >your briskly walking through the forest and found yourself on a dirt path
- >you walked on it, remaining cautious
- >who the fuck sceamed
- >brain:your mother after i fucked her
- >fuck off brain, we're the same person
- >you eventually find yourself looking at the trees themselves
- >they had transitioned from regular trees into apple trees
- >huh, there werent any apple orchards anywhere near you
- >you decide to indulge yourself a bit and shimmy up one of the trees
- >you grab two apples and put one into your pocket and the other into your mouth
- >you land on the ground with a loud thump
- >it was louder than you expected
- >you then hear another loud thump
- >then nothing
- >then another one
- >what buttfuckery is this?
- >you look around and see nothing
- >so you continue on your merry way
- >you walk for a little while before you see something off in the distance
- >its a cart full of apples
- >not too shocking, but atleast it meant civilization
- >you come up upon the cart and see an empty harness attached to the other side
- >guess the work horse was somewhere else
- >voice:"HEY, wut're you doin with mah apples?"
- >you turn to face the country accent with a half finished apple in your hand and one in your pocket
- >what you see isnt what you expected
- >you see an orange pony pulling a cart of apples
- >is this the real world?
- >she keeps walking toward you while in an aggressive stance
- >or is this just fanta-sea
- "uhhhhhh"
- >she begins to unlatch herself from the contraption
- >brain, any ideas?
- >brain: stay and talk it out
- >yeah that sounds good
- >she finishes unlatching herself and bolts towards you
- >you turn around and run with speeds that could make you travel through time
- >you drop the apple in your haste
- >that only makes her angrier
- >shes slowly catching up to you
- >not good
- >legs cant you go any faster?
- >legs: we're at maximum capacity sir
- >WELL RUN FASTER
- >you see a barn come into view
- >target acquired
- >you pick up a little bit of speed
- >emphasis on "little"
- >shes still catching up to you
- >you're getting closer to the barn
- >brain: *warning* proximity alert sir
- >lolwut
- >you look back in time to see an orange pony flying at you
- >you hit the ground violently and come to a skidding stop on your stomach
- >there was definitely gonna be some road rash
- >the pony flips you onto your back and still has an angry look on her face
- >pony:"why're you stealin mah apples you dirty thief"
- "i didnt think they belonged to anyone"
- >pony:"well they do, and now you'll have tah pay for em'"
- >she lands a hard punch on your face, knocking you out
- >
- >
- >
- >you wake up with your hands tied behind your back
- >you're also bound at the knees and ankles
- >brain: so lets get a quick recap shall we?
- >brain: you were just knocked out, tied up, and are now the prisoner of a talking colorful pony
- >it seems that way
- >brain: HAHAHAHAHA, you're such a faggot
- >you're apart of this t-
- >your thoughts are interrupted by the barn door opening
- >you try to gasp, but fail
- >how did you not notice a ball gag in your mouth
- >kinky, but you were still scared of whats to come
- >in walks that orange pony from earlier
- >instead of anger on her face she had a wicked smile
- >not good
- >she kicks the door shut behind her and continues walking towards
- >you try to squirm away but only move back a few feet
- >shes standing over you now
- >that smile grew wider
- >she places a hoof on your chest and beings to apply pressure
- >pony:"now listen here, ahm gonna remove that gag. but yah better not yell or else"
- >you dont move, just stare at her, trying to hide the fear in your eyes
- >she reaches down and unhooks the latch on the back of your head
- >the gag slides onto the ground
- "what're you gonna do to me?"
- >she punchs you across the face
- >pony:"ah thought ah told yah not to talk"
- >she punches your face in the opposite direction than the last
- >this bitch could punch
- >the look back up at her and shut your mouth
- >pony:"now, about how you're gonna... pay me back"
- >that wicked smile comes back with avengence
- >she turns around and backs her rear up to your face
- >brain: AND your about to get raped by a horse. this day is getting funnier and funnier
- >fuck off brain
- >your vision goes black as her ass lands on your face
- >pony:"now put that mouth ah yers tah work"
- >she puts a hoof into your gut at the end of her sentence
- >being that you had maximum powerlevels back at home
- >home probably being far far away
- >the only things you knew about eating out were all of the many, many, many, many, many stories you've read
- >you slowly lick up and down her slit then gradually go in deeper
- >you slowly insert your tongue in and out of her hole
- >penis: PENIS DOES NOT WANT THIS. PENIS WANTS TO DIE
- >you continue licking her slit before you feel a small nub appear
- >you focus your attention on that, flicking at it with your tongue
- >every time you touched it you could feel her shake on top of you
- >then she punched you in the gut one more time
- >pony:"hurreh up! ah aint got much time"
- >you pick up speed
- >alternating between her clit and sticking your tongue in and out of her
- >eventually she starts to convulse on top of you
- >you continue eating her out as she does this
- >after about a minute of shaking she falls forward onto your stomach, her head barely avoiding your crotch
- >thank god she avoided your crotch and instead landed on that FUCKING ROAD RASH
- >penis: PENIS DOES NOT WANT TO BE HIT. PENIS WANTS TO BE LOVED
- >shutup penis, i have other pains to deal with
- >she lays on top of you for a long while, panting heavily
- >she must've really enjoyed it
- >you however, didnt really like the fact that you were just forced to eat out an orange pony
- >she eventually catches her breathe and turns back around to face you
- >shes giving you the most seductive bedroom eyes you could handle
- >she reaches her hoof up
- >you brace for another hit
- >it never comes
- >you open your eyes to see her reach for the ball gag
- >dammit
- >she puts it in your mouth and latches it
- >she then drags you to a nearby wooden beam and ties you to it
- >as shes walking out she turns back to face you
- >pony:"by the way, mah names applejack"
- >*error* unable to give fuck. fuck folder not found. contents empty *error*
- >shes still looking at you
- >applejack:"and welcome to your new home, slave"
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