The day the Brad stood still

>being norman

>it has been 5 years since you finished high school (not bothering with college because fuck you)

>you thought it would be ha releif to never ever have to meet your classmates ever again ever, the exception being the girls

>one person you'd definitely not miss was Brad

>at the last day of school the motherfucker never gave you a fucking break, always gabbing on about he'd miss this guy and that girl and how many times he raped this and that person(no seriously)

>you had absolutley no reason not to punch him in the face

>now you have a reason not to punch him in the face, your helicopter would crash if you did

>apparently, the very instant you finished school the lot of you were pulled into millitary service, I.E "shoot everyone/everything that isn't white" service.

>orange complained, purple didn't understand shit, pink just hopped around and threw confetti at people again, yellow decided to hide in a corner again, blue started yelling awesome all over the place, aryan beauty just stood there and thought about how hideous all the men's clothes were or something, brad yelled "BRADICAL" at the top off his voice and you altered between cringing and thinking of a design for a weapon

>now you were here, after 5 years of millitary service you were about to get sent into some really deep shit

>you've gotten reports about some sort of outbreak in England, your task is to head in and figure out what the fuss is all about

>how did you en..

>"OI, NORMAN, WAKE UP GODDAMNIT"

"zzzhuh... whawhawha I'm awake sir" you slur as you are lulled out off your little daydream because of your supervisor yelling at you

>fuck, blew it again

>"we'll reach our destination in 5 minutes" said brad "what's the dealio anyway"

>"the locals have been issuing calls about strange activity all over London, your task is to head over to a farm at the outskirts, work your way through the city,kill everything that isn't human and discover what is going on here"

>"Bradical!"

>goddamnit Brad

>"gentlemen, get your gear ready, time for work" says the pilot

>"ladies and gentelmen" exclaims the aryan beauty"

>the pilot remains silent

>you get your gear ready, everyone has a different weapon as a favorite

>orange has a semi-auotimatic shotgun, a xm10 by the looks of it

>purple has a gold-plated katana( don't ask)

>brad has a m14 sniper rifle

>pink has a rocket launcher

>blue has a pistol

>aryan has a .44 revolver

>yellow has a mp5

>you've got your trusted golden ak-47

>the thing is so beautiful that you just want to kiss it

>no time, you're not getting paid to make out with your gun

>you do the standard routine of making sure that noone is dead or missed the chopper or whatever

>none dead and all here

>off you tot

>the farm sees like a calm place, nothing att all really

>ok, it smells like complete arse, but that is just because it wouldn't be any fun otherwise

>you have no idea where the smell comes from, you're not going to care, either

>everything seems normal, you even spot a human over there somewhere

>you tell the others to wait in case shit starts rocketing fanwards

>you walk up to ask him if he knew anything about this at all

>the closer you get, the less human the guy looks

>he isn't wearing any clothes, has a giant knife instead of a right hand and his skin is red

"how'd I miss the knife" you ask yourself

>apparently, he heard you

>he turns around and starts to chase you, knife up in the air like he is the start up to a fucking hate mob

>you run as fast as you can,while doing so you signal brad to shoot him

>the idiot is busy staring at purple, though

>fuckit

>you turn around and blow his head in half

"what the fuck is going on here" you wonder as you examine the corpse, as you speak, you signal the others to move up

>"what is that.. THING!" asks aryan before she goes behind a barn to throw up

>she clearly didn't sign up for this shit

I have no Idea" you sigh

>your group stares at the body, when you notice something... off

>both his hands are tied to the knife he was holding

>he also has no lower jaw

"this can't be good"

>your group exchange a few looks and whispers

>even brad is nervous, he is never nervous

>"not bradical"

>even if he didn't yell it, you still cringe

"ladies, gentlemen, brad, we have one thing to do, get to the bottom of this"

>you spend the next 10 minutes explaining why you don't want to be around any longer than what is needeed

>everyone agrees to do this as quick as possible

>you start to move towards the little house in the middle of everything, weapons ready

>purple takes the lead, considering she is the one who can slice them into meatloaf if they get too close to her

>the rest of you go in an unspecified order, the only demand being that brad is in the back

>you can't stand him and his weird smell

>what is that guy eating

>anyway, you decide to man the fuck up and barge in through the front door

>bad idea

>in the house there are a bunch of the prementioned knife-weilding dopeheads

>that's not all of it

>there's even a bunch of women with some sort of straight-jacket, no eyeballs and the weirdest fucking hairdo you'd ever hope to see

>suddenly, all of the women start screaming at the same time

>ohgodmyfuckingbrain.jpg

>rush out the door

>run like a black guy on a 100-meter track

>don't look back at all

>when you reach the fucking hill from which you arrived, you stop to count

>you see: purps,orange,pink,yellow,blue... everyone

>except brad

>oh dear

>purple asks where brad is

>tell her that he is probably down there

>she can't fucking take it

>she unsheaths her katana, its golden blade shimmering lightly in the watch of the moon

>she looks at you with that "if I don't come back" look

>she is now running downhill only to see brad get stabbed in the chest by a large knife, blood pouring from him and then watching his body drop to the ground

>you follow her down the hill, keeping a distance becasuse you know what's about to happen

>like you predicted, she starts spinning up like she's a fucking beyblade

>a whole stream of colours dance before your eyes

>red and yellow mixed with purple fly around like a tornado

>it's beautiful

>after 8 seconds of doing the goldspin(hehehehehe), she stops and runs over to brad, his devestated form bringing tears to her eyes

>"twi... I..." he slurs before coughing and then closing his eyes

>Purple does not want to believe this

>she starts shaking him like he's a bottle of champagne and hoping that he'll wake up

>it's to no avail, however

>you put your weapon on your back and walk up to her, hoping that you can calm her down

>because you remember what she said to Brad before the mission

>"if you die, I will follow you to heaven"

"purple?" you ask with deep concern

>"what?" she gives you a glare and emmits an aura of sadness and anger, a single tear rolling down her cheek

"I hope you know that we still have a mission, I can't let you waste time by crying." you say, "we'll take care of him later, just come with us"

>"I can't" she mumbles "I gave him a promise and I intend to keep it"

"don't do it, please"

>"I'm sorry"

>she then turns her sword so that it's pointing directly at her stomach

>she gets on her knees and closes her eyes

"please..."

>too late

>she jams the sword right through her mid-section, an unmistakeable golden tip pointing out through her back

>she mumbles something and then falls over

>you are so done with this

>you can't afford to lose anymore soldiers

>you flip purple over on her back, put her next to Brad and picks the katana out of her chest

>you then enter the barn to fetch some gasoline

>you pour it over them, being careful not to miss any part

>you pull out a cigarette and light it up, flicking the match over to them

>take one deep suck and turn around, not wanting to witness the fire

>when you get back the others ask where purple and Brad are

>you just give them a look of defeat and show them purp's sword

>they understand

>you call the pilot and tell him to come and pick you up

>mission completed, all of the monsters are dead, but you lost two damn good soldiers in the field

>as much as you hated brad, seeing him go like that was not ok

>once you return you decide to give up this bullshit

>the rest of the team does the same

>yellow and blue move in together and get married, they've been in a secret relationship since high school started

>pink goes back to her bakery and orange goes back to farming

>you and aryan find the love in one another and decide to live with eachother

>you never want to think this ever happened ever