Norman gets his feet illuminated (part 3)

"So, Norman, want to go get a drink?" Asked Brad at the exit.

 

"Don’t know, I kind of have to get back to the Crownguard place." Norman replied.

 

"Come on dude, it's our first victory in the field." He made a pause "Aaaand I've heard of this new place in town, they are supposed to have the best ale in all of Valoran."

 

Norman was surprised, how come there was a new place in Piltover and he hadn't heard of it, he was always the first on getting the news in town.

 

"Sure, we have to celebrate, right?" He said. He was shaking more than a naked man in Freljord.

"Yep, we most certainly have t... Are you alright?" Said Brad, he was staring at Norman.

"Yes, I'm fine, let's go"

 

They took a stroll down to the centre of town, talking about everything and nothing. Once they reached their destination, all they did was stare at it.

"Welp, here it is" Said Brad.

He then pushed Norman through the door, because he wouldn't move on his own.

Once they entered there was a really, really, really bad smell, like, 3 week old sock smell.

Whoever built this place can't have a good sense of hygiene at all.

They got used to the smell rather quickly, mostly because the summoner thing smelled even worse.

This place was really something; there were nice chairs, gold-plated glasses, really fine beverages and even a band. Norman had never seen a band in a pub before.

 

The band's music was a bit questionable, the song they were playing at the moment was in the middle of something, and the only thing he could hear was:

"Come on, shoot faster, just a little bit of energy, I want to try something fun right now, I guess some people call it ANARCHY". He lost track of the lyrics when he saw the singer.

 

It was a girl in her mid-teens; with long, blue hair in pigtails; she had magenta eyes, like, completely.

He wondered why they'd let a child sing in a pub, let alone have booze right next to her.

His thinking was disturbed by someone dragging his arm.

"What?" He was quite upset.

"Are you coming or what?" The voice was very familiar.

It was Brad.

"Oh, right." Said Norman and let himself get dragged around for a bit.

 

They sat down at a table, later on, a sort of animal arrived and said "You guys 18?"

Norman and Brad were forced to show their IDs to the beast, he then nodded and went away.

He arrived shortly after, with a glass in each hand.

"Here, it's on the house, for summoners only." He said and placed the glasses on the table.

"Thanks." Norman said.

 

"Cheers mate." Brad shouted as he raised his glass.

Norman did the same, their glasses clinked against each other and then they drank.

Norman was first with emptying it; he was thirstier than he thought.

After a while, he was starting to feel dizzy.

 

He tried his best to keep himself upright, however, it was rather futile, and he fell to the floor with an audible thud.

Before he nodded off, he heard another thud, followed by some voices.

 

>3 hours later.

 

Norman woke up, that's as far as he knew, he couldn't see anything .

"He's awake, boss." Was heard somewhere.

"Good, I'll take over from here."

He heard a door slam, followed by a blinding light. He tried to shade his eyes, but they were tied to his back.

"Hello there, little summoner."

Once he regained vision, he saw the one that was talking to him, it was a man, buffed up to the max, with a beard, suit, fedora, and tommy gun to match.

"What do you want?" Said Norman, his anger was building up by the minute.

"Nothing major, I just wanna know why a summoner decided to visit our place, in broad daylight, and with some of these".

The man held up a thin belt, it was Norman's kunai.

 

"I-I-I-I don't know why I had those with me, should have left them at the Crowngurad's." Said Norman.

"Crownguard, you mean, 'the' Crownguard?" The man was gaining interest in his new captive.

"Yes, those Crownguards, the ones that live in Demacia and shit."

The man moved behind Norman, and then he cut his hands free.

Norman was getting a bit hopeful, until he saw the fist flying towards his face.

It was a hard punch, strong enough to send Norman to the ground.

"I went to them once, I only asked for a place to stay over the night, I got booted, I also never got a piece of that Luxanna ass." The man was really mad.

"Gee mister, I sure am sorry for you getting your dreams smashed and being so upset, I promise I'll sto...AARGH" one of his own knives burst through his left hand.

 

"Fuck, take a joke, asshole" He said.

"And everything you say just makes me angrier, choose your words with care, it'll be the right one next. Now you're going to tell me everything I want to know." Mr. Tommy gun was quite mad now.

"Ok," Norman activated his dick-mode. "What you do is, you go down to the local pharmacy, ask for something called Viagra, and it'll help you go FUCK YOURSELF!"

 

Tompipes Mcgee was getting sick of this and put his weapon against Norman's head. Just as he was about to pull the trigger, there was a gunshot somewhere else.

 

The Tom-armed man fell to the floor, with a big hole in his chest.

Blood was seeping out from him, staining his suit and pouring out in a puddle on the floor.

"Hey Vi, I got one!" Yelled a female voice.

"WONDERFUL!" Was heard just before the wall blew up and another female ran in.

"Nice work, cupcake" Said the one that Norman assumed to be Vi. He wasn't sure though so he did as he had done with every female up until this point and looked at her for an uncomfortable amount of time in order to make sure what they look like.

 

"You OK, little guy?" Said Vi after a bit of awkwardness.

"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks to you two." He replied.

Vi stretched her arm towards Norman, just then did he notice that she was wearing 2 giant gauntlets.

He didn't ask questions; instead, he accepted the help and got up on his feet.

"So," he said "Would you mind explaining what's going on?"

"Well" the other female opened her mouth to speak, but shut it again to think.

"Do I need to talk for you again?"  Vi exclaimed, "we are the Piltover Facepunch Professionals, or the PFP, we are on a mission to take care of the Piltover mafia that has been causing a lot of trouble."

"Ooooooook" Norman was getting really iffy about this.

"Vi, where are your manners? you didn't even introduce us." Was said by the other one, she sounded like someone's nagging mum.

 

No one said anything for a long time. Norman was getting tired and wanted to go home, but he also wanted to find Brad, whichever suited him the best.

"If both of you are going to act like small children, I'll take the first step, the name's Norman Normal, and you two are?"

"I'm Vi muthafucka"

*SLAP*

"Bad, now, my name's Caitlyn, I'm sorry, Vi gets a bit excited during a mission" said the other one.

"I don’t mind some energy now and then, nice to meet you." He told them and went for the exit.

“Oh, I forgot, we need to interview you in order to find out more about these people.” Caitlyn said, making him freeze in place.

“You have to take me to what?”

“Interview” She said once again.

“Why?”

“You were the only one here, except for him” She said and pointed at the dead body.

“And I suppose he won’t be too much help?”

“Correct”.

“Who am I to question the police?” He asked himself. “Take me in, ladies”

They searched him for anything out of the ordinary; the only thing they found was the knife in his hand.

She grabbed it and pulled it out, Norman bit his lip to not yell in pain, to his surprise, it hurt more to get it out than to get it in, he’d have to remember to tell Lux that.

“Can’t you use that in your research? I think he left something on it, you might trace it.” He said in between painful whimpers.

“This knife is to as much help as a fish right now.” Vi said.