Evil Norman

>your name is Norman Normal

>yesterday, your nemesis, Sunset Shimmer, did a really stupid thing

>she jumped off a building because of.. really good question, no one knows why

>no one cares, either

>now you are at the local hospital, not because you want to be friendly, but because you are going to do something you've been wanting to do for 3 months

>sing her a farewell song

>you bring an acoustic guitar and your best singing voice

>this is it

>you've got 5 minutes

>let's do it

>Oh and Now

>The end is near

>And you face that final curtain

>So good-bye to strife

>This is the last dance of yer life

 

>Lord of this you're certain

>you've been a sinner.

>you've been a saint.

>Done both good and evil deeds.

>Oh, but in the end, you were good to yer friends

>and that's good enough for ye.

 

>Oh good Lord, they say all souls you forgive.

>Well if that's true then why

>does there need to be a hell?

>Hey, what's that sulfury smell?

>Now you can feel, the fire, creepin up your thigh.

 

>yer goin to Hell,

>in a handbasket.

>It's a Bohemian Rhapsody.

>Oh, Galileo, mama mia, scaramouche, scaramouche.

>Oh, Beelzebub's got a devil put aside for ye.

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>With yer flesh they'll make a feast.

>you're gonna be there in that number.

>That's 666 the number of the beast.

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>Well at least you'll have a view.

>Oh you will see the fire, through the rusty razor wire.

>Oh don't you worry, I saved a seat for You.

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>And I might like it that way.

>No this ain't no lie, you'd rather be Kentucky Fried

>Than live and kicking in Jersey any day

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>you'd pray if you had the guile.

>No this ain't no fib, you'd rather be a splatter on the Devil's bib.

>'Cause on yer knees repentent ain't my style.

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>Oh I won't pray for ye.

>No you don't need to be saved, of the devil you ain't afraid.

>There ain't nothin he can do that ain't already been done to me.

 

>yer goin to Hell, in a handbasket.

>And you'll have good company too.

>'Cause If you were so bad, than there's no need to be sad.

>'Cause everybody else will be there too (Including Me).

 

>Oh, oh good Lord, you only ask him forgive

>The self righteous who decieve

>When your words they twist,

>We both know Hell don't exist,

>Except in the minds of the poor fools who believe

 

>with the last words she is gone, and you can put your plan into work

>you are sunset shimmer

>you just died after jumping off a building

>the last thing you remember was norman singing you a song, not a nice one but still

>now you are in a burning pit, full with lava and fire

>you know exactley where you are, and you don't like it one bit

>suddenly, you hear a massive creak

>two massive gates open and you see a very familiar figure emerges

>the beanie

>the jacket

>thisisn'treal.jpg

>the figure starts playing a violin and sings a song

>when the devil is too busy

>and death's a bit too much

>they call me by name you see

>for my special touch

>To the gentlemen I'm Miss Fortune

>To the ladies, I'm Sir Prize

>But call me by any name

>Any way it's all the same

>I'm the fly in your soup

>I'm the pebble in your shoe

>I'm the pea beneath your bed

>I'm a bump on every head

>I'm the peel on which you slip

>I'm a pin in every hip

>I'm the thorn in your side

>Makes you wriggle and writhe

>And it's so easy when you're evil

>This is the life, you see

>The Devil tips his hat to me

>I do it all because I'm evil

>And I do it all for free

>Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

>While there's children to make sad

>While there's candy to be had

>While there's pockets left to pick

>While there's grannies left to trip down the stairs

>I'll be there, I'll be waitin' round the corner

>It's a game, I'm glad I'm in it

>'Cause there's one born every minute

>And it's so easy when you're evil

>This is the life, you see

>The Devil tips his hat to me

>I do it all because I'm evil

>And I do it all for free

>Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

you never thought he was capabale of this shit, showing a bunch of pictures of him tripping old ladies and nicking stuff from children, pickpocketing and you noticed that you have started to cry, he collects the tears in a mug and starts drinking them WTF

>I pledge my allegiance to all things dark

>And I promise on my damned soul

>To do as I am told, Lord Beelzebub

>Has never seen a soldier quite like me

>Not only does his job, but does it happily

>I'm the fear that keeps you waked

>I'm the shadows on the wall

>I'm the monsters they become

>I'm the nightmare in your skull

>I'm a dagger in your back

>And extra turn upon the rack

>I'm the quivering of your heart

>A stabbing pain, a sudden start

 

>And it's so easy when you're evil

>This is the life, you see

>The Devil tips his hat to me

>I do it all because I'm evil

>And I do it all for free

>Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

 

>And I do it all for free

>Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

>And I do it all for free

>Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need

 

>It gets so lonely being evil

>What I'd do to see a smile

>Even for a little while

>And no-one loves you when you're evil...

while singing this he pulls you in asif to hug you, he sounds rather sad and you are willing to accept it

>I'm lying through my teeth!

>Your tears are all the company I need!

with the final plucking on the violin, he throws you to the ground and bashes your face against the floor

"why are you doing this" you ask him, not wanting a reply

>"I have dreamed about this for three months straight, you stanky cunt" he says with the most devillish grin ever

>he then chops your head clean off

>you wake up

>Never ever am I doing that shit ever again ever