Title: Personae Non Gratae (Rainbow Dash) Author: Six_Hooves_Under Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/ga7iNSVz First Edit: Monday 28th of January 2013 09:49:23 PM CDT Last Edit: Monday 28th of January 2013 09:49:23 PM CDT >Walking through the forest. >Plodding along the worn down path. >The only sound to be heard was that of your heavy footfalls and the rattling of masks on your rucksack. >Such is the life of a traveling mask salesman. >It is a lonely one to be sure, but you get to do the thing you love most! >You get to spread happiness! >You make people happy! >Happy! >HAPPY! >H??????A??????????P??????????P????Y????????????!?????????!????!?????????????? >.... >Yes....happy... >You continue on your rambling journey, seeking people to spread your happiness to.   >You floated on your back in the Highland Reservoir, letting the cool waters soothe your aching muscles. >Today had been exhausting. >And you had nothing to show for it! >You couldn't make another Sonic Rainboom, no matter how hard you tried! >You were Rainbow Dash, and you couldn't figure out how you, the fastest pegasus in all of Equestira, couldn't pull off your own signature move. >Letting out a sigh of frustration, you use your wings to propel yourself to shore. >You shake of as much water as you can and then go searching for that towel you brought along. >After toweling off, you lay down on the grassy shore with your wings splayed out along the grass. >You'll give the Rainboom another go after you let your wings dry out. >As you lay there, grumbling to yourself about what you were doing wrong, you begin to hear and feel the the sounds of hoof falls. >Although these hoof falls don't sound like anything you've ever heard. >You raise your head and begin glancing around. >A few seconds later, you see a strange bipedal creature with what has to be the largest backpack you've ever seen. >It looks like a shaved minotaur, except it's got a funny shaped head and legs. >The sheer oddity of the sight before you keeps you glued to the spot. >After walking on for a bit, the creature seems to notice your presence and turns it's head to look at you. >It smiles at you. >”You look like you are in need of some happiness.” >It can talk? >”Of course I can talk.”   “Wha! How did you do that?” >”OH, the how and why are not important. The only thing important about me is my masks.” >As he, you realise this because the creature sounds male, says this, he grabs a mask that was dangling off the side of his backpack and shows it off to you. >”I sell masks that are made from around the world! They bring happiness, you see.” >The mask he's holding doesn't look like much of a mask at all. It actually looks like a pair of rabbit ears. >”Want to give one of my masks a try?” >You don't think a mask is going to make you happy. “Uhh...yeeeah. I don't think so.” >You get up from the grass and begin to go elsewhere to find a sunning spot when the creature says something else. >”Okay, I guess you don't want to ever be able to do a Sonic Rainboom again. It's a shame really. This mask could have helped you do it quite easily.” >You stop dead in your tracks. >How did he know what you were doing? >Just who is this guy? >”I told you, the how and the why are unimportant. I am also no one of consequence myself. One could say I am the very definition of Anonymous. Even I don't know who I am. However, I am known by one name. I am the Happy Mask Salesman, who brings happiness wherever he goes!” “Hmph, I don't need happiness or your stupid mask to help me perform a Sonic Rainboom. Wait right there and I'll show you I don't!”   >With that, you snap your wings open and launch yourself skyward. >Your wings were still a tad damp, but nothing you couldn't handle. >You continue to ascend until you got the altitude you needed. >You roll your body so as to go into a nosedive. >Beating your wings furiously to gain speed, you rocket towards the ground. >The air whipped by you, pulling your skin taught from the drag and G-forces. >As you continue your descent, you could feel yourself approaching the sound barrier. >You could see the vapor trail starting to form. >You push on, trying to gain more speed. >The wind is now far more intense, stretching your lips backwards. >You're almost there! Just a little more! >Suddenly, you stop and are flung back upwards, tumbling through the sky and land back in the Highland Reservoir. >Smooth move Rainbow Crash, you just proved the strange thing right. >With a groan, you make your way back to shore again. >”Impressive showing. Now, care to give my mask a try?” “Hmph...fine. I'll give your stupid mask a try. Let me dry off first.” >The creature nods and waits for you to towel off again. >After you feel sufficiently dry, you walk over to the creature. >”I'm glad you came around. Now, let me tell you a little something about this mask...” >Oh great, he's an egghead. >You tune him out, throwing in an occasional “Yeah.” and “Uh huh.” in the mix. >As soon as he's done speaking, he holds the mask out towards you. >You grab the mask and stick it on top of your head. >”Now, remember-” “Yeah yeah, I got this.” >Having said that, you spread your wings out and launch yourself forward.   >DEAR SWEET CELESTIA!!! >You were going so fast! >And you weren't even flapping your wings hard! >This is amazing! You could make a Sonic Rainboom easy! You didn't even have to nosedive! >You flap your wings a bit harder, seeing the vapor trail forming and growing narrower. >Soon enough, you feel yourself pop the sound barrier and perform a Sonic Rainboom. >Your exhilaration is so much that you don't notice the wind resistance on your skin, stretching it to it's limit. >You figure, if you could make a Sonic Rainboom this easily, how much faster could you actually go? >You beat your wings faster and faster, ignorant of your skin screaming in protest. >You soon reach speeds previously thought impossible for any pegasus to achieve. >You scream past Canterlot going roughly one and a half times the speed of sound. >The entire castle shakes from the force of your rainboom. >There's no way people didn't notice that. >There's no way people didn't notice YOU! >But, you knew you could go faster yet. >You knew you could show EVERYONE you could go faster! >You continue accelerating faster and faster and faster, until you feel a strange feeling. >It's feels like a bandage being ripped off of you, except it's all over. >And it hurts MUCH worse! >Oh Celestia the pain! >You tried yelling out, but the onrushing air made it impossible. >You tried steering with your wings, but found you had no feathers. >The only thing you could do was stick around for the ride as you fell right into a collision course with the Foal mountain range. >The last thought to run through your head was: “I hope no one sees this.”   >You plod along a mountain path this time. >The scenery makes no difference to you, just the destination. >You would wonder how you got to the mountains so fast, but trivial details like distances don't concern you. >Only happiness concerned you. >Suddenly, something smacks into the side of the mountain a few dozen yards in front of you with a sickening crunch. >You continue plodding along, knowing exactly who it was. >The Rainbow pegasus you meant moments before. >You tried to warn her, you really did. >But she didn't listen. >Oh well. >It's a shame really. >But the happiness she felt! >It was absolutely sublime! >Yes, this would keep you going for quite some time. >Soon enough, you plod up to the red paste that was once the fastest pegasus alive. “You've met an unfortunate fate, haven't you?” >The mask you gave her was still out there somewhere, but you weren't concerned. >Your masks always found a way home. >T????????h??????????e????y???? ????a??????l??????w?a?y???????s?????? ??????????????????????i???????????d????????.??????????????