Episode 8: Lady Luck

Episode 8: Lady Luck

 

(Scene 1 opens inside of the apartment.  We see Brad watching the TV while on the couch, Norman enters from the maid door to applause)

Brad: (Looking to Norman) Where have you been?

Norman: Over at Green’s place...man I really hate that guy sometimes.

Brad: What, did he make fun of your X-Box and call you a pleb again?

Norman: No, its just, the guy has the exact same floorplan as us and pays the same rent, yet, every time I go over there, it seems like his apartment is bigger on the inside than ours. (Laughter)

Brad: Weird.

Norman: So what are you doing today?

Brad: Just hanging out, might watch the game later.  Feels good to have a day where I can just sit back and relax.

Norman: I hear that.

Brad: What about you?

Norman: Oh, Aryan Beauty and I might go out for awhile today.  Its a good day for a drive.  

Brad: Nice, just make sure you use her car.

Norman: Why, what’s wrong with the Ferrarity Equestarosa? (Laughter)

Brad: Oh...you mean your Fiero with the body kit on it? (Laughter)

Norman: Touche.

Brad: So you’re going to be heading out in a little bit then?

Norman: Yeah, as soon as she’s ready I guess.

(Theres a knock at the door)

Norman: That must be her now.

(Norman opens the door and Rarity enters to applause)

Rarity: Hello Darling!  (To Brad) Hello.

Brad: (Waving) Hello.

Rarity: Are you ready, Norman?

Norman: I am.

Rarity:  Oh, I’m so excited, I haven’t been to the Ca...

(Norman cuts her off)

Norman: Car Show!  Haha, yeah...I haven’t been to a car show in forever either.

Brad: Car show...shoot, I wish I knew about that, I could have taken the Bradilac for a cruise.

Norman: (Cringes at the name of the infernal car, laughter) Yeah...oh well...see you later.

(They go to leave)

Brad: See ya.

(Outside the apartment as they get into Rarity’s car.)

Rarity: Car show?  I thought we were going to the casino.

Norman: We are, I just didn’t want Brad to know.

Rarity: Why not?

Norman: Remember what happened the last time we went to Canterlot Downs?

Rarity: You mean how Brad nearly lost all his money, and only broke even because Twilight caused the horse equivalent of a slave insurrection.

Norman: Yeah.

Rarity: Good point. (Laughter)

(Back inside the apartment we see Brad knocking on a door, it opens and Scott appears.)

Brad: You ready?

Scott: Almost, come in, come in.

(Brad walks into the apartment and looks around, he is impressed)

Brad: Nice place you got here, it seems like...

Scott: It’s bigger on the inside than it looks on the outside...yeah, I get that alot. (Laughter)  So where is your roommate?

(Scott grabs his keys)

Brad: He and Rarity are going out for a while, something about a car show.

Scott:Good for him, freaking pleb. (Laughter) Well, lets go then

(Quick cut to the two in the Bradilac on the highway)

Scott: To the Iron Horse Casino!

Brad: Bradical!

(Quick cut to Norman with Rarity, Pinkie, and Dash in Rarity’s car, he cringes, Laughter to end scene)



(Scene 2 opens inside of the lobby of the Fabulous Iron Horse Casino, an enterprise of the Buffalo Nation,  It is packed with people.  We see Norman, Rarity, Pinkie and Dash walking through)

Norman: This place is huge!

Rarity: It certainly is.  

Dash: Why are there so many people here today.

Pinkie: (Skipping and bouncing along) Its the Casino’s 20 anniversary today.  There are celebrations going on throughout the whole casino.  Theres even a huge poker tournament this afternoon.

Dash: Say no more, I’m in.  (She Disappears in the direction of the poker room, laughter)

Pinkie: And they even brought the Cake Boss in to make a special super secret birthday cake.  I brought a cake pan for him to autograph for Sugar Cube Corner. (Laughter)

Norman: Well...I guess we can look around a bit. (Norman, Rarity, and Pinkie walk off and fail to see...Scott and Brad walk into the lobby)

Scott: You ready?

Brad: Of course, I have a system.  By the end of the night you and I will be covered in women and money. (Laughter, the audience has heard this before).

Scott: Good...so heres the plan:  We will split our starting bank.  We find a good limit blackjack table, we play in tandem, and we start busting the dealer.  Then, we split the winnings. (holds out his hand, Brad takes it and shakes it)

Brad: Deal.

(Cut back to Norman and Rarity, they are seated at a Big Six Wheel.  Essentially, one bets on a pattern that might come up on the wheel, in this case: 3 cherries, 3 oranges, 3 lemons, 3 plums, and 3 bars, each are worth different odds)

Dealer: (As the wheel stops) Bars...(To Norman) $20 on the one dollar bet to you, young man. (Places chips in front of him)

Rarity: Thats the third time you’ve hit it!

Norman: True, but it always at the end of the twenty I set aside for betting.  

Rarity: And...you’re breaking even, thats far better than anyone could usually say at these places.

Norman: Yeah...could you imagine how Brad would be doing if he was here. (The two laugh as we quick cut to Brad looking distraught at a blackjack table)

Dealer: Bust....sorry son. (Laughter)

Brad: (Slapping another $50 on the table) get that in fives please?

Scott: (Whispering) You’ve lost $150 bucks already...is this part of your system?

Brad: Not really...but I’m just warming up.

Scott: Yeah well, throw another log on it, eh? (Laughter)

(We cut to the poker room where Dash is sitting at a table wearing reflective sunglasses, a huge stack of chips before her.  An announcer is heard as we watch the scene unfold)

Announcer: Well, here we are with the final table at the Iron Horse Championship...Its down to four here...Phil Hellmuth is the short stack(We see Hellmuth in his usual black jacket, ball cap, and sunglasses, looking quite sour).  Doyle Brunson sits in third. (We see Texas Dolly with his trademark cowboy hat)  Phil Ivey is in second. (Camera pans to him), and lead stack is the relative newcomer, Rainbow Dash, who bought her way into this tournament and hasn’t looked back since.   And here comes the turn card.  (We see four cards on the table A A 10 7, Hellmuth looks at his cards, a pair of kings...)

Hellmuth: (bets) Raise

Brunson: (Folding) I’m out.

Ivey: (Likewise) Too rich for my blood.

Dash: (Immediately) Call.

Announcer: Down to these two, heres the river.(A A 10 7 A)

Hellmuth: (Pushes all chips to the center) All in.

Dash: (A smirk) Call.

(Hellmuth flips his hand with a smile, a full house, aces over kings)

Dash: Oh....very nice.  A full house...it would be a shame if, (She reveals her hand, an A and 3) someone had four of a kind.

Announcer: She’s knocked another one out...this time a 9 time world champion!

Hellmuth: (Darting up from the table) This fricking donkey stuffs $15,000 in with Ace-Three. I mean, the girl can’t even spell poker....You’ll never see me put my tournament life on with Ace-three.

Dash: Donkey?  I prefer pegasus, twenty percent cooler. (Laughter)

(Ivey leans over to Brunson)

Ivey: You ever seen anything like this?

Brunson: Son, I’ve won every tourney known to man and drank Canada Dry but I have never seen anything like this. (Laughter to end scene)

 



(Scene 3 opens back at the blackjack table, Brad slaps another fifty down on the table)

Brad: Can I get that in fives?

Dealer: Sure.

Scott: Brad...maybe you should stop, your $400 down.

Brad: No worries....I can break even yet...

Scott: I think you’ve had enough.

Brad: (grabbing Scott) I’ll tell you when I’ve had enough. (Laughter)

(The dealer looks at his watch)

Dealer: Gentlemen, that’s the end of my shift.  Its been a pleasure playing with you.

(He leaves only to be replaced by a female dealer, as the camera pans up her body from her feet up, we get cuts to Brad staring at her.  As we see her face we recognize it is Cherry Jubilee.)

Cherry: Hello Gentlemen.

Scott: Hello.

Brad: How you doin? (Laughter) (To Scott) Idea!

Scott: Eh?

(Brad knocks over his drink all over the table)

Brad: Oh....damn!  I’m so sorry.  

Cherry: Oh, its alright, it will take more than that to hurt these tables.

Brad: (Pulling out a handkerchief and giving it to her) Please, allow me to assist.

Cherry: Thank you.  (She begins cleaning the table, then cleans her uniform up a bit, before going to clean her face, she inhales and collapses against the table.)

Scott: The hell!

Brad: Bradical!

(Quick cut to Norman still sitting with the $20 in chips at the wheel cringing with Rarity looking at him worriedly) (Laughter)

Scott: Did you knock her out?

Brad: (Sheepishly) I might have. (laughter)

Scott: So this is how you’re going to solve our little problem?

Brad: No, I’m just going to take advantage of the house is all. (Laughter)

Scott: So...you’ll do unspeakable acts to the dealer but you won’t use this opportunity to steal back all of the chips you lost?

Brad: (Picking up Cherry and taking her away) Of course not, stealing is illegal. (Laughter)

(Cut to Norman and Rarity in the lobby, a crowd has gathered for the unveiling of the cake)

Rarity: Well, you broke even, and got us a comp meal...all in all a good day I’d say.

Norman: Most definitely.  

(Enter Dash with a shiny bracelet and a large novelty check for quite a bit of money under her arm.)

Dash: Hey guys, whats up?

Rarity: Where have you been, Darling?

Dash: Just taking care of some hacks in the poker room. (Laughter)

Norman: Hey guys...where’s Pinkie?

(Rarity and Dash Shrug)

Voice: Your attention please. (All look up to the podium)

(We see Chief Thunderhooves as a well built gentlemen of Native American descent.  He is wearing a well cut suit and seems to be happy to see such a crowd.)

Thunderhooves: 20 years ago, when we created the Iron Horse, it was a couple of trailers that we played Bingo in...look at us now! (cheers from the crowd) And now it gives me great pleasure to introduce the man of the hour, the Cake Boss himself, Buddy Valastro.

(Valastro comes on stage dressed in his normal chef’s attire, white jacket and all.  He steps to the mic)

Valastro: Thank you so much for having me here today.  I’ll tell you, I have had the opportunity since arriving yesterday to play in the casino a bit, take in a show, and play a round of golf.  Equestria is blessed to have such an amazing resort, don’t you think?

(The crowd roars in Approval)

Valastro: But enough talking....who wants to see the cake?

(The Crowd is going wild)

Valastro: Drum Roll Please!

(There is a drum roll, the white screen is pulled aside by the lovely assistants and reveals....Pinkie sitting at the table raising the last piece of cake on a fork to her mouth.  The crowd gasps)

Pinkie: (Finishing the cake)  Hello Everyone! (laughter)

Valastro: What the hell?!?

Pinkie: (Jumping up) Mr. Valastro!  (Running over and shaking his hand)  I’m a huge fan of your work!

Valastro: (flatly) I can tell. (Laughter)  That cake was a 1/24th scale model of the entire casino property....

Pinkie: I loved the parking garage by the way. (Laughter)

Valastro: I...I’m not even angry...I’m impressed. (Laughter)

Thunderhooves: Well, I’m angry.

Norman: Goddamnit Pink. (Laughter to end scene)

 

After Credits Scene:

(We see Norman, Rarity, Dash, and Pinkie driving home)

Pinkie: Thanks for paying my bail, Dashie.

Dash: No problem...I think I had a bit to spare. (Laughter)

Norman: I wonder how Brad’s day off was?

(Cut to Brad and Scott, the scene is looking up from the trunk of the Bradilac Tarantino style as the two talk)

Scott: Remind me to never use you as a gambling wingman again.

Brad: Oh come on...I’d say we beat the house. (we see from Brad’s point of view Cherry tied up in the trunk. (Laughter to end the episode) (Next Week Episode 9: What’s new Pussycat?)