Title:           Oreos and Fetishshy
Author:          Sinistertriip
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/TYs3ZtLN
First Edit:      Saturday 27th of October 2012 11:00:20 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 27th of October 2012 11:00:20 PM CDT

>Wake up to another beautiful day.
>Turn to an upright sitting position and yawn while stretching out your arms.
>The sun is shining brightly through your curtains, bathing your room with a brilliant yellow hue.
>You feel that today was going to be a great day.
>Ever since you came to Equestria, you were greeted with nothing but kindness.
>However, regardless of all the good friends, and good things that have happened to you.
>Only one thing can cast a shadow on them all.
>Oreos, the most prized possession and joy from Earth.
>You were at the local supermarket on Earth when you somehow got zapped over to Ponyville by Twilight Sparkle.
>And thank fucking whatever entity decided to smile at you that day, brought down the whole shelf of Oreos.
>It’s a good thing that Ponyville has cows, because no Oreos are complete without milk.
 
>Get dress and open up the curtains to see Fluttershy just outside your window.
>She’s smiling brightly
>You sigh, todays going to be another one of those days.
“Fluttershy, I told you many times to stop guessing my fetish….”
>Fluttershy’s smile dims down to a sad expression and looks down towards the ground.
>”Well… I thought that today I could guess it right….”
>You throw the curtains back closed and walk downstairs grumbling.
 
>You walk over to the cabinet, grab a box of Oreos and set them down on the table, then grab a cup and pour milk and sit down.
>Devouring the succulent cookies, you can’t think of how this day can get better.
>Soaking the Oreos in milk, softening the chocolaty outside lair then eating them
>If Fluttershy guessed that Oreos were your fetish, she would be right.
>That’s when you hear banging on the door.
“UGH Enough Fluttershy!”
>Get up and open the door to see the yellow Pegasus scuffing her hoof along the door mat.
>Cross your arms and glare at Fluttershy.
“What is it this time?”
>Fluttershy starts shaking with the amount of nervous stress she is carrying, gulps down and speaks in a very low voice.
>”Is….. is….. *quiet mumbling* your…. Fetish?”
“I didn’t hear a word you said Fluttershy.”
>She gulps again.
>”Is…. Are wild birds stealing your Oreos your fetish?”
>Wait…. What.
 
>NO.
>Turn around and see a whole fucking flock of birds stealing your Oreos with a fish net, all holding a side and flying out the window with your precious Oreos.
>You run to the window screaming, as you watch the birds fly away towards the horizon with your Oreos.
>Rage, you can feel the rage inside yourself increase, as if it was like a PSI gauge about ready to blow a gasket.
>Fluttershy made those fucking birds take your Oreos.
>Your god damned OREOS!
>You have nothing to live for.
>Looking towards the sky you shake your fist and scream with the force of Dovakiin.
 
>You angrily turn towards Fluttershy, malice and pure rage in your eyes.
>She yelps and hides her face behind her mane.
>”W….Well is it?”
>You storm towards her, grab her by the mane, spin her around and let go, throwing her off towards the horizon while she screams.
>You sit down at your table and begin to sob, seeing a bunch of bird shit all over the table.
>Today is now a bad day, as it begins to rain and lightning clashes.
>Fuck you Rainbow Dash.
 
>Days later. Be shut up in your shed.
>Grow a beard, smell like ass.
>Haven’t eaten for days.
>All because of Fluttershy’s fetish guessing.
“It’s all her fault….”
>You repeat that phrase over and over again.
>Haven’t eaten for days, stuck in a fetal position rocking back n’ forth sucking your thumb.
>Withdrawals suck.
>Especially from Oreos.
 
>A knock on your door.
>Ignore it.
>”um…. Anon? I am very sorry….. I just have something to show you….”
>It’s Fluttershy.
>Ignore.
>”I am very sorry about your Oreos….. Hopefully I can fix it.”
“You can’t fix anything Fluttershy.”
>Voice is hoarse, it hurts to speak.
>Only thing that is keeping you alive is drinking your tears.
>It doesn’t taste good.
 
>Fluttershy knocks again.
>”Well… I guess I can’t show you what my new guess is of what your fetish is Anon….. I am absolutely sure that this IS your fetish.”
>As soon as you heard Fetish, a gasket blows.
>It’s time to kill a bitch and shove her head on a stake and plant it outside your house.
>Push yourself off the ground, scream with rage and yank the door open.
>look down to see Fluttershy hiding behind her face beneath her mane again, but she’s wearing an Oreo.
>She is a fucking Oreo.
>It was probably made by Rarity.
>fucking cunt.
 
>In your delirious state, you don’t see Fluttershy anymore, you just see the Oreo.
>The Oreo is calling out to you.
>”Eat me, eat me.”
>Fuck it, it’s an Oreo, you haven’t eaten for days.
>Start devouring the Oreo.
>Blood and fabric being torn everywhere.
>There was screaming for the first five minutes, but you didn’t care.
>You were eating a mother fucking Oreo.
>Until you choke on a needle stuck in the border of what looked like to be the cream part of the Oreo being connected to the cookie.
>Today was a bad day.