Title:           /r/ Oneshot "Old Tradition"
Author:          ShinobiPony
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/U08smcdh
First Edit:      Tuesday 11th of December 2012 10:05:29 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Tuesday 11th of December 2012 10:05:29 PM CDT

>Day wiener in Land o Horse
>You are a chronic masturbator, to the point where you play with your junk in public
>Its no different here
>Walking around town with your hand down your pants you notice that the p0nies are staring
>Not one fuck
>Finally a mare comes up to you
>”Umm, if you don’t mind me asking, what are you doing?”
>Oh shit nigger, think of something
“Oh umm, old human custom, Yeah! Ancient even”
>Some whispering erupts
>”Well, I don’t want to be insensitive…”
>She cups your junk
>Hello erection
>The other looks around and murmur
>”If its tradition we should welcome it?”
>Agreements all round
>Yes
>YES!
>All of the p0nies in town here of it and come out to play with your dick
>Oh god, so much equine fondling
>So many hooves down your pants
>fgdhshdgfhdg
>It how all of them greet you now, with a cup of your cock
>Somedays you would lay down on the playground and little fillies and colts would use your rod as a maypole
>Other days you would get p0nies from other towns come just to molest you
>Glorious…
>Finally a rumor started that your penis is good luck
>From everywhere around Equestria p0nies would come to p0nyville to ask you to slap them in the face with your junk
>Then came the best part
>The first Church of Anon Shlong
>There were a thousand conversions overnight
>Every Sunday p0nies gather in the great cathedral to watch you drop your pants and spin your meat, singing hymns all the while
>Celestia had enough and came to do battle with you
>She fired a bolt of lightning at you
>Only for your holy rod to absorb it and fire it back
>In a flash, she was gone, and all her power rushed to you
>To raise the sun, you wack it with the speed of Kenyans
>And that is how, new Equestria was founded…