Title: Strelnikov Tribute Author: ShinobiPony Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/Jb9VVxKg First Edit: Sunday 9th of December 2012 10:22:40 PM CDT Last Edit: Sunday 9th of December 2012 10:22:40 PM CDT I intend no offence if that’s what you feel at this, also keep in mind that this is not accurate, I don’t know what really happened and just wrote this as I feel Strel would have done   >Day unknown in Russia http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t--n7oU_oRk >A ragged cough sounds in the dim room >Laying in a bed, covered by a blanket with the Russian flag sewn into the front, is the imposing form of a Russian man >Strelnikov is his name >”THIS BEING SICK BUSSINESS IS FOR THE BIRDS” >Scowling at nothing, he sits in bed brooding >Even with jarring lances of pain wracking him, so painful that a lesser man would be reduced to tears, he remains stone-faced, a testament to his will >Sending a forlorn glance to his computer in the corner of the room, the monitor lit, the letters “/mlp/” plain as day the Russian man wonders about all the things he’s experienced on the dreaded site >He sighs, then winces as an especially bad jolt of pain races up his form “ENOUGH OF THIS” >Slowly rising out of the bed, Strelnikov shuffles to his kitchen >Spying a bottle on the counter, he grabs it and takes a swig of the clear, burning contents in one fluid motion “SCREW WHAT DOCTOR SAYS, YOU DON’T KEEP RUSSIAN FROM HIS VODKA” >Taking another mouthful of liquor Strelnikov looks at his calendar on the wall >On the last day of the month is a circle >Such a simple mark means so much >One month >That’s how long they said he had >Strelnikov grinds his teeth, hating the fate he was dealt >No…there is one thing he can do >Steel in his gaze, the Russian downs the rest of his drink in one go “NO, STRELNIKOV IS A MAN, A MAN THAT WILL GO ON HIS OWN TERMS” >Mind made up, he slowly walks back to his room, his agonizing condition slowing him >Finally there, he digs through his closet, producing a small box >Taking it to his bed, the Russian takes off the lid, revealing his father’s old service pistol >Picking up the gun gingerly, he takes a still full magazine out of the box and loads the weapon >With a click, he chambers a round into the old gun >Pressing the barrel to his heart, Strelnikov takes one last look to the computer in the corner, /mlp/ still on the screen “ALL OF YOU, YOU ARE SCUM OF INTERNET” >The Russian man smiles wanly “…BUT NEVER HAS BEING WITH SCUM BEEN SO ENJOYABLE” >He puts a finger on the trigger “IF I FIND ANYONE OF YOU IN HELL SOON, I WILL KICK COLLECTIVE ASSES” BANG! ~~~~~~~ >Disorientation >That’s all he feels >The ground shifting >The wind chaotic >Whole body tingling >A bright white light >Whether it was seconds or hours he would never know, but once it all stops he realizes he is on his back on the ground >With a groan, Strelnikov sits up and opens his eyes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLy1YbU8BOk >All round are trees and grassland, green and verdant as can be >Strelnikov looks up, seeing blue sky, clear as springwater “THIS IS NOT HELL…” >Standing up, Strelnikov feels no pain >Wait, no pain? >Looking at his hands, no longer pale and clammy, it hits him “STRELNIKOV IS HEALTHY? HA! NOTHING GETS A RUSSIAN MAN DOWN” >Taking a deep breath of clean air, he looks around to gain his bearings >As before, all around is greenery with the exception of the north >Walking to the opening in the forest, Strelnikov stops and stares, struck dumb by what he sees >Down a hill on the opening is a very familiar rustic town… >Could this be..? >Craning his head around Strelnikov sees a mountain in the distance, a castle attached to it’s side “NO, IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE…” >Rubbing his eyes and looking back at the town he sees that nothing has changed >Ever so slowly, a grin forms on the man’s face “LOOKS LIKE STRELNIKOV WILL BE WRITING HIS OWN STORY AFTERALL” >He looks down at the town “LETS GET STARTED ON CHAPTER ONE YA?” >Without a look back, he starts off to the settlement of P0nyville >It would be only the first of many wonders earth could never offer   >A perfect fate for a deserving man   We will miss you Strel, If any of us are worthy of making it to Equestria as an afterlife, it was you.   I know you’re there. Live the dream you glorious motherfucker, Live the dream.