- >”WHAT!” Exclaims Twilight as you break the news to her
- >You frown
- >”Was it something I did? I’m sorry, I’ll stop!”
- >You hold up your hands to stop her
- “Twi, It’s not your fault, it’s just it’s getting abit crowded in here, with you, me, Spike, your owl, and Peewee, its getting small in here”
- >Twilight’s face falls, “But…”
- >You bring yourself down to her level and brush a bit of her mane out of her face with a hand
- “ Twi, its not you, really this pains me too. But its not like I’m going away, I’ll just be in town”
- >After Celestia had started to send you letters via Spike, the conversation in said letters had quickly turned less than innocent
- >As such, you had asked her about finding a new residence and a way to communicate other than using Spike
- >She had responded that she would run some paperwork though to make you a citizen, letting you buy a house to avoid any compromising situations and a theory about an enchanted notebook replacing the letters, right before the letters went back to flirting with the infrequent photo thrown in
- >It amazed you how a millennia old goddess would openly communicate with you in what was this world’s form of sexting
- >She acted like a horny teen really
- >Putting those thoughts aside you look back to Twilight who still seems less than pleased
- >The mares in town had quickly caught on to the fact that you tend to be much kinder than stallions, and it was showing
- >Twilight and the others noticed too, just as they noticed that you seem to be getting more and more female attention whenever you walk into town
- >They weren’t too happy with that
- >Your guessing that’s why Twilight is so devastated with your wanting to move out
- >It’s only a matter of time before they are putty in your hands
- “Don’t worry, even if I do find a place I’ll have to wait a few weeks for the paper to be pushed, so you’ll have me here for a bit longer”
- >She eases some but still looks downtrodden
- >You sigh and look at the clock
- >You had to go out and meet Rarity and Applejack, who are going to help you find a nice place in town
- >Both being successful salesp0nies they seemed to be the best to ask
- >With one more look at the clock you sigh and address Twilight
- “Gotta head out Twi, don’t let this get you down alright?”
- >”Alright…” she says before nuzzling your face with hers
- >You smile and hug her tightly, not missing the small ‘squee’ she made as you did
- >Getting up you give Twilight one final goodbye start out towards town at a leisurely pace
- >Walking though the town square you get your usual waves and greetings, some a bit more enthusiastic from mares
- >You smile a lady killing smile and wink at a group of mares who were standing a bit away, watching you, making them blush, giggle and turn away
- >Oh yes, it’s not long now…
- >Walking out to the east side of town, you start out to Sweet Apple Acres to get Applejack first, knowing Rarity would be less than willing to walk the dirt path to the farm
- >On the way you can’t help but marvel at all the apple trees that the Apple family tends to, there had to be at least a thousand of them
- >All that physical work…
- >“Anon!”
- >Lost in thought, you didn’t notice the pale yellow blur rush you and barrel into your middle until it was too late
- >With an “Oof!” you tumble to the ground with an amber eyed, red headed filly resting on your stomach
- >”Oops, mah bad Anon”
- >You look at your attacker to see young Applebloom giving you a sheepish smile
- >Applejack’s kid sister, sweet if a bit thick
- >You give her a mock angry look
- “My bad? I don’t think that will cut it this time”
- >Not giving her anytime to digest what you said you spring up while snatching her in your arms
- >Pivoting your feet around, you spin as fast in place as you can
- >Applebloom lets out a short scream that quickly turns into thrilled giggles
- >”AHHH! Anon! *giggle* Stop! Ah’m gunna be sick!”
- >Slowing to a stop, you set the woozy filly back to the ground, who staggers some with her eyes rolling dizzily around
- >You give Applebloom an amused grin, one that she matches once she rights herself
- “So short stuff, where is your sister?”
- >”AJ is in tha house, and Ah’m not short! Yur just tall!”
- “Of course, short-stuff…”
- >”Hey!”
- >You just laugh and walk the rest of the way with Applebloom
- >Right as you get to the ranch styled house the ribbon wearing filly rushes in hollering “AJ! Anon’s here!”
- >”Be down in a second!” Applejack’s voice calls from the second floor
- >Walking in you see Big Mac and Granny Smith lounging about in the living room, today is saturday, the only day the Apple family takes off on the week
- >You give them both a nod
- “Mac, Mrs. Smith”
- >Mac just nods back from his spot on the other side of the room, to the point as usual
- >Granny Smith on the other hand snorts and gives a reply
- >”Ah thought Ah told ya Anny, Granny works jus’ fine here”
- >As much as she told you that you still couldn’t force yourself to be any other way, Lady’s Man code demands that you be kind to any woman of any sort, even if they are not on the “potential” list
- “Well it wouldn’t be respectful is the thing Mrs. Smith”
- >She shakes her head slowly “Never did Ah think Ah would ever have a problem with a stallion being respectful, let alone bein’ TOO respectful”
- >You smile
- “I try my best ma’am”
- >She gives you a wan smile “Anonymous delivers”
- >Hearing the distinct sound of hoof on wood you turn to see Applejack descending the stairs
- >She sees you and a grin finds its way to her face
- >”Howdy Anon”
- “Nice to see you as well AJ”
- >You nod to the door
- “Ready to head out?”
- >Applejack nods and you two head out back to town
- >On the way you can’t help but notice how close Applejack is walking to you
- >She’s almost leaning on you really
- >Several times you brush up against her on “Accident” just to see her jump
- >You also saw her give a few mares the stink eye though town
- >Normally this would freak you out a bit but you had to remember that there was almost 5 to 6 mares to a stallion, making a lot of stallions into jerks and the compotation for a half decent guy fearsome
- >Making it to the boutique you and the orange p0ny walk in
- >Back in the shop you see Rarity turn from her current dress project on a p0nyquinn at the sound of the doorbell
- >”Welcome to the Carousel Boutique, where everything is- Oh! Anon!”
- >Rarity trots up, levitating her things back to their spots as she nuzzles your legs not unlike a cat
- >”Ahem?”
- >Rarity stops to see a less than pleased Applejack
- >”Oh where are my manners? Hello to you too Applejack”
- >The flat look on the farmer’s face moves none
- >Best defuse this now
- “A pleasure to see you as well Rarity, ready to go?”
- >She turns her “Open” sign to “Closed” with brief flash of magic
- >”I am now darling”
- >You nod and head out with the p0nies in tow
- >Rarity leads you to an ok looking house with who you assume to be the realtor out front
- >The gray earth p0ny with the slicked back mane and tacky tie smiles and trots up to you
- >”So you’re Anon eh? Nice to meet you hope we can get you a nice place to stay before the day is out the name is Land Bits” he says with some insane speed as well as a greasy voice, not unlike a used car salesman
- >You can already tell this guy is slime
- >Both Rarity and Applejack glance at the house dubiously, obviously seeing something they don’t like
- >”Hey hey hey, let’s get this thing here started eh?” he shoots out before trotting to the front door
- >Getting closer you can see that the house’s foundation is leaning to the side
- >That’s a great sign…
- >Walking in the questionable building, Land revs up his mouth
- >”Sooooo, swell place we got here, new roof, and water heater as well as some nice bay windows, bit of leaning here and there but hey, still a great place for the low low price of 120,000 bits over a 10 year mortgage with only 15,000 down !”
- >Scratch that, this guy had to have been a human used car salesman an old life
- >Great price?
- >Yeah, no
- >The whole building is leaning a good 20 degrees and the walls looked like someone had hid bodies in them
- “Ehh, I’m not feeling it. Girls?”
- >Both of them take one look around before agreeing
- >”Tough customer eh? Well old Land Bits knows just the thing!”
- >He leads you out and across town to another house
- >This one actually looks good
- >”Well here we are! Great place here, nice view of the neighborhood, upper part of town, a finished basement and the whole motherload for only a 145,000 bit 15 year mortgage!”
- >”Sure is strange how ya’ll didn’t lead us inside…” Applejack remarks from your side
- >”Well, ehheheh, the inside is fine! Great even! Why would you need to see it?” Land retorts nervously
- >Is dis nigga for real?
- “Riiiiiight, well I’m taking a look”
- >You push past the greasy p0ny who looks ready to shit a brick and open the door
- >And the inside is…!
- >Actually very nice
- >You walk in and stand in the middle of the front room and look around
- >Welp is looks like you forgot just how nice these p0nies are
- >crack…
- >”Um Anon dear?” Rarity asks from the doorway with Applejack and Land
- “Yes?”
- >Crack
- >”You may want to look down…”
- “Why would I-?”
- >CRACK
- >You look down to see cracks in the wood floor around your feet
- >Well shit
- >CRACK!!!
- >The floor beneath your feet gives and the 3 p0nies watch as you disappear into a hole in the floor
- >CRASH!
- >”Anon!”
- >Groggily looking around from the pile of rubble you fell on, you note that at least Land wasn’t lying about the basement being furnished…
- >You sigh, today is going to be a long day…
- ~~~~~
- >6 hours and 10 houses later you, Rarity and Applejack are about ready to throw in the towel
- >Land Bits seems content to just show you almost condemned houses and giving out prices that are just too damn high
- >Finally Applejack hit her boiling point
- >Showing up to a small house with a sagging roof she lost it
- >”-only a 7 year mortgage of 189,999 bits? Sound good or sound good?”
- >Gritting her teeth Applejack marched up and got right into Land’s face
- “Hold up here mister, you’ve been leadin us on all day fur places that ain’t even livable fur prices that are almost double what a normal place should be, ain’t you got any shame?”
- >Land looks surprised for a moment before he bears his teeth with a scowl
- >”Look little lady it’s your fault you don’t want any of these places, I’ve been nothing but honest here”
- >At the word honest the cowp0ny looks ready to explode
- >”Honest? HONEST? You sir are a lyin’, cheatin’ no-good buckin’ snake in tha grass, you ain’t honest in the least bit”
- >Land’s scowl turns into a look of almost hatred
- >It’s rather unsettling to see such a look on a p0ny’s face
- >”Nop0ny calls Land Bits a liar!” he raises a hoof to strike the orange mare
- >What?
- >Nope, that will not fly
- >A man never touches a woman in violence, not with you around
- >You sir have McFucked up
- > Just as he swings to strike the shocked Applejack you lash out with a hand and catch his hoof
- >Finding the ankle of his hoof you dig your fingers into it and savor the agonized expression on his face
- >With a dead serious face you lean down and face him with less than an inch between you
- “Let me make this clear… If I ever see you attempt to harm a female in my sight again, let alone one of my friends…”
- >You smile wide, making sure to bring attention to your canine teeth
- >He gulps
- >”I will fuck you up…get me?”
- >He hastily nods
- >You release his hoof
- “Get lost”
- >Land runs like hell is at his heels
- >Ignoring the stares of P0nyville you turn to a stunned Applejack and Rarity
- “You two alright?”
- >Both mutely nod
- >Rarity is the first to speak
- >”Anon darling, I’m sorry today has been so much drama, but I think I need to exuse myself. Today has just been…”
- >She brings a hoof to her face and sighs
- >You wave her off
- “It’s fine Rarity, we can do this another time with a better realtor hopefully”
- >”Of course, good evening Anon, Applejack” and with that she departs back to her shop
- >You turn back to Applejack
- “You alright AJ?” you ask softly
- >She finally shakes herself out of her stupor
- >”Yeah, jus’ fine Anon…”
- >You don’t believe that for a second
- “Want me to walk you home?”
- >The orange p0ny smiles faintly “Ah’d like that…”
- >The trip back to Sweet Apple Acres is spent in silence
- >About halfway back Applejack leans up against your side as you walk
- >You say nothing but bring a hand down to her and pull her as close as you can without impeding your gait
- >When you finally get there the sun has set and the moon has begun rising
- “Well, here we are” you say as you stop at the ranch house and release Applejack
- “So Aj, what’s really on your mind?”
- >She looks up at you, her expression downtrodden as she mumbles something
- “Speak up AJ, I can’t hear you”
- >”…Ah froze…”
- “There’s no shame in that Applejack, he was about to hit you”
- >She snaps her head up to glare at you “YES THERE IS! AH SHOULD HAVE TURNED AND BUCKED HIM INTO NEXT WEEK! BUT AH…But ah…”
- >She looks at the ground, using her hat to cover her glistening eyes
- >”Ah was scared…”
- >You mask your surprise with an impassive expression, AJ scared?
- >Time for a reassurance
- >You get down to your knees and pull the farmer into a hug
- >She protests none, and after a moment, rests her head on your chest
- “Ah’m an element of harmony, and one of the tuffest p0nies ‘round…why did ah freeze?”
- >You say nothing but hold her tighter
- “Sometimes AJ, we just don’t have an answer for things, but I can answer you this”
- >You pull back some and look into her melancholic green eyes
- “So long as I am around, I won’t let any harm come to you”
- >Slowly a smile comes to her face
- >”Thank ya kindly Anon, thank ya kindly
- >You smile and release her
- >Standing, you give Applejack a nod and turn to walk back to town
- >”Wait!”
- >Stopping, you turn to see the mare trot up to you
- >Stopping just short of you she looks conflicted for a moment before steeling herself
- >Raising herself up on her hind legs and planting her forelegs on your waist, Applejack brings herself to you height and presses her lips to yours
- >Surprise jolts though you before instinct takes over
- >Wrapping your arms around the cowp0ny you pull her closer, pressing your body to hers as you deepen this kiss
- >Tastes like apples and cinnamon, you note with little surprise
- >Applejack moans and doesn’t resist
- >Taking her forelegs from your waist and throwing them around your neck she pulls herself even closer to you as her tongue prods your lips
- >You take the invitation and open your mouth, letting your tongue and Applejack’s meet in a sloppy, erotic dance
- >You lean your back onto the house as you explore the back of her mouth
- >Finally needing air, you and her break with a smacking sound, a thin shining strand of saliva still connecting your mouths
- >AJ looks at you with an adoring stare; her freckled cheeks flushed a dark red
- >Looks like she is most likely to be the first
- >And you are more than happy with that

