Lady's MAnon Ch1

>You are Anonymous, Lady’s Man Supreme

>And right now, you had no idea what to make of your situation

>The day had started out normal enough, wake up in a bed that wasn’t yours, leave a note to last night’s fuck buddy, Tabby you think it was, and head out to do whatever you wanted

>Working as an assistant to a Psychiatrist had almost no hours and swank pay, letting you devote a lot of time to stuff you liked

>Like last night…

>Feeling hungry from the exercise the night before you had stopped at a McDonalds on your way home

>The food was kind of gross and the people there were even worse but damn if you weren’t hungry

>While waiting in the drive though for the fat lady with too many kids in front of you to order you felt the weirdest sensation

>Your thoughts immediately shot to AIDS

>Who the hell could have given it too you!?!

>Tabby you bitch!

>Oh God, please not AIDS…

>There it is again…

>What the…

>And that’s all you got to think before you were dragged through what felt like a hole the size of a dime

>You fell though a swirling maelstrom of color that seemed to go on forever

>BAD TRIP MAN! BAD TRIP!

>Then as fast as it happened you get tossed through another small hole

>Holes abusing you, what an ironic, soviet Russia joke worthy twist

>Rocketing out what had to be the universe’s asshole at 100 miles an hour you crash into a book case

>Dazed, you look up

>And meet face to face with a purple unicorn?

>What

>The

>Fuck?  

>With a scream from her, some curses from you, and some telekinetic man-handling things could have gone better

>Which leads up to now

>Being suspended midair had lost its novelty after a few minutes and you were currently scrolling through your phone while the unicorn was writing a letter

>Damn, you hope this shit get sorted out soon, you got like 4 texts with sex invites in them

>You take some time to look around

>The walls, floor, and ceiling are made of wood, giving the area a very homey and rustic feel

>Book shelves lined the walls, filled with, what else? Books

>There also seems to be a small door near the front of the room

>Nice place for a horse

>The unicorn finishes her letter and floats it to a small, purple and green biped lizard nearby

>The little guy blows some flame onto the letter, burning it to ash, which then flew out an open window

>Both turn to you with curious if slightly fearful looks

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer”

>Both of them jump

>”You…talk?” asks the unicorn with a disbelieving look

“Yep, names Anonymous, and you are?”

>She seems embarrassed “My name is Twilight Sparkle, and this is Spike” she says with hoof pointed to the lizard as she said “Spike”

>Just from a look and a brief two sentences you already have her pegged

>Preppy, polite, and proper. Maybe with a bit of OCD thrown in if the immaculate state of the building and her looks are anything to go by

>Manners will get far here

>You give her a pleasant smile

“A pleasure to meet you Miss Sparkle, and you too Mister Spike, I only wish we could have met under…better circumstances”

>Both seem taken aback at the manners you displayed

>”Oh, um…Twilight is ok Mr Anonymous…”

>She seems slightly bashful as she said this

>If the books were any indication then she probably read more than she gets out, making positive interaction with a guy a rarity

“Of course, but only if you call me Anonymous, or Anon for short”

>You smile once more

>Twilight returns it before she notices that you are still floating

>”Oh! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to keep you levitated like that! You sort of scared us is all.”

“It’ s fine”

>The purple glow around you disappears, letting you fall to the floor

>Free of the aura you dust you’re self off and take a look over to Twilight and Spike

>Apparently they didn’t see just how tall you are compared to them being levitated and are now gaping at you

>Twilight came up to about your waist and Spike was just above your knee

>“Wow you’re tall!” Spike exclaims with a boyish voice

>You smirk and bend down so that you’re eye level with him

“Or maybe you are just short?”

>”Hey!”

>Twilight giggles some before regaining her composure “Anon, you seem to be taking this awful well”

>You turn to her still crouched

”Taking what well?”

>”You know, the whole different reality thing…”

“Heh, Twilight, I studied psychology, metaphysics, and some theoretical physics, there’s not much that can surprise me”

>She perked up as she heard what you studied “Psychology, metaphysics, and theoretical physics?”

“Umhm”

>Twilight smiles wide “That’s so interesting!” She gushes “What all did you study?”

“Well…”

>You are cut off as a knock comes from the door

>Twilight gasps “Princess Celestia! I forgot!”

>Princess?

>A cold lump settles in your stomach

>Oh shit…

>No no, don’t panic, You are Anon, lady’s man

>You can charm your way out of this

>You hope…

>Twilight rushes to the door and opens it

>Flanked by 2 white p0nies clad in golden armor walks in a tall, majestic p0ny

>She’s as tall as you if count the long, spiraled horn on her head

>She has a coat of pure white, her horn and wings the same color, her mane and tail are the same colors as an aurora

>On her head rests a gold crown inlayed with a purple gem, same with the gold chestplate she sports

>Her single exposed amethyst eye looks at you with guarded curiosity

>”I take it this is the creature that you mistakenly summoned Twilight?” The princess says in a regal tone, not taking her eye off of you

>Twilight mutely nods  

>”Very well, Twilight, may we use an unoccupied room of yours”

>Another nod

>”Thank you my faithful student, guards, remain here.”

>Celestia turns to you “Please follow me”

“Of course your highness”

>She and the guards seem surprised that you spoke, as Twilight was

>After leading you to what seemed to be a guest bedroom she closes the door and turns to you

>”I’m afraid that we have not been properly introduced, I am Princess Celestia, and you are?”

>Ok Anon, don’t fuck this up

>You can only hope that this will work outside of your species

>You put on your patented lady-killer smile as you bend down and take her right hoof in your hand

>Planting a kiss on it, you let it go to see Celestia looking surprised along with a dusting of pink on her cheeks

>You had her down

>The lonely ruler whose position made her seem unattainable to all save idiots, discouraging others from approaching her, resulting in starvation of male attention

>Almost cliché

>Still smiling you give her a bow at the waste before straitening and responding

“Its an honor to meet you your majesty, My name is Anonymous, Anon for short”

>She clears her throat and forces the faint blush down “T-the pleasure is all mine.” She says with a barely noticeable stutter

>You still caught it however

>She continues on recomposed “Anon, I would like to know your intentions for my little p0nies, summoning magic is somewhat obscure here in Equestria so it will be sometime before we can send you back to your home”

>Looking out for her subjects personally?

>Quite the caring monarch

“Nothing of ill intent your grace, that much I can assure you of” you respond, trying to keep your speech as sophisticated as you can

>Her somewhat rigid stance eases some

>”In the mean time, what do you plan to do?”

>A good question, what will you do?

>After taking a moment to think you vocalize your thoughts

“Well, if I’m going to be here for sometime then I will have to find a job and a place to stay. Plus with this being a whole new world I certainly won’t be bored, I’m sure that I can find…”

>You cut your eyes to hers, letting your smile grow slightly

“Excellent company, wonderful sights and new experiences”

>You say that while looking at Celestia, whose blush had come back with a vengeance as she looked down, the floor suddenly seeming interesting

>Now you are in your element, time to get a bit more dangerous

>Your smile transforming into a predatory grin you slowly stalk your way up to Celestia

>Normally you wouldn’t do this sort of thing to an animal

>But if you were going to be stuck here for a while, you were going to enjoy it

>Celestia seems to be frozen as you approach

>Getting within arm’s reach you bring your hands up to her still red cheeks

>Running your thumbs through her plush soft fur you bring your mouth close to her ear

“Oh yes, something tells me that boredom will be hard to come by here” you whisper into her quivering ear, blowing into it at the end

>She shivers and seems to fight the urge to lean into your hands

>Its only a few seconds before she gives in

>The instant she does you let go and back away

>The Alicorn almost falls at how sudden you do so

>Folding your hands behind your back you continue on as if nothing ever happened

“If that will be all princess, I believe our business has concluded”

>It takes her a few seconds to respond

>”Y-yes, I believe that i-is all…” she says, trying poorly to hide the disappointment in her voice

>Walking to the door you open it and offer the doorway to her

“Ladies first”

>Celestia takes deep breath and once more composes herself before walking out

>Back down stairs Celestia addresses Twilight

>“My faithful student, I would be grateful if you would allow Anonymous to stay here for the time being”

>Twilight smiles “Of course it’s no problem, in fact I would be love to! There is so much to learn from a being from another universe”

>Celestia smiles too “Also please allow Anon to send me letters and vice versa as needed, I…wish to keep tabs on him” she says with the faintest tinge of pink on her face

>Oh? A direct line of communication?

>You just give her a grin      

>She turns red again and gives you a bashful smile before signaling her guards to follow her as she leaves

>Alone with Twilight once more she bounds up to you with a barrage of questions

“Whoa whoa whoa, one at a time.”

~~~ hour and a half later~~~

>God damn

>Twilight seemed to have a whole list ready for you

>Being patient you just answered as best you could, after omitting and sugarcoating anything that would reflect badly on you of course

>The topics ranged from society to economy, your studies and childhood, to friends to family

>Poor Twi was beating herself up on the last one

>”Anon, I’m so sorry! I didn’t think about your loved ones before trying that summoning spell, I-I”

>You stop her with a finger to her lips

“Twi it’s fine, It was a mistake and I don’t blame you for it”

>”But but!-“

“No buts, its alright…”

>She stops and gives you a small smile

>”…Thanks Anon…”

>You find yourself with a grin

“If you want to thank me then you can smile more, you’re quite beautiful when you do”

>She looks away, twiddling her hooves “You’re just saying that…”

>You gently grab her chin with a forefinger and a thumb and bring her face to look at yours

“I mean it, the while room practically lights up when you do”

>Her face goes from upset to beaming in a flash

>”You think so?”

“I know so”

>Her smile gets wider before a look of realization comes to her face

>”Oh I almost forgot! Anon how would you like to meet my friends?  

>Twilights friends?

>Why not

“Sounds great”

>”You’ll just love them I know!”

“I’m sure”

>With a flash of light she teleports out

>You turn to Spike

“Any idea how long this will take?”

>The young dragon just shrugs  

>Welp

>With nothing to do you wander over the one of the many bookshelves

>Searching, you find one called “Equestria, a History”

>Sounds good

>Planting yourself on Twilights couch you open the book and skim though important looking bits

>About 15 minutes pass as you read up on Equestria before Twilight returns with 5 other p0nies in tow

>You close the book as she leads them over

>”Girls” Twilight starts “This is who I summoned by mistake, meet Anonymous”

>You scan through the 5 p0nies Twilight had brought with her

>They all seem to be in various states of shock, sans the pink one, who looked ready to explode with excitement

>Deciding to make the first move you stand and put on your usual smile

“As Twilight said my name is Anonymous, Anon for short. Might I have the pleasure of knowing your names?”

>This seemed to snap them out of their shock, and set off the pink one, who crossed the room in a single bounding step right up into your face

>”OH MY GOSH THIS IS SO SUPER DUPER AMAZEING! YOU’RE LIKE AN ALIEN! MY NAMES PINKIE PIE! DO YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?!” this pink p0ny exclaims all in less than a second

>You take her jumping up so close in stride and observe her for a second

>Bright, energetic, and excitable, most likely fun loving, sweet to the core, and very likeable in general

>It seemed that only the chubby girls back home could have this spontaneous a personality, yet Pinkie seemed to be as healthy the others

>Interesting

>Still wearing your woman-smiting smile you reply

“I guess this is pretty amazing, and I would love to be your friend Pinkie”

>She looks like if she gets any more excited that she might burst into treats

>Saving her friend from death by amazement overload the rainbow hued pegasus of the group flies up to you

>Without any sort of hesitation she introduces herself “Names Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria”

>Proud, cocky, brash, and attention grabbing seems to be the best way to describe her

>Possible confidence issues?

>Judgeing from how slim and fit she is compared to the others it’s safe to assume she works a laborious job or is an athlete of some sort

>Possibly a lesbian?

“I bet you are, nice meeting you”

>Rainbow beams at the complement

>The next to walk up is an alabaster white unicorn

>”My name is Rarity, charmed to make your acquaintance darling”

>High class and sophisticated, with an even voice, immaculate appearance and graceful gait to match, likely enjoyed the finer things in life

>Proper manners would work nicely with her

“The pleasure is all mine, Miss Rarity”

>She holds a hoof up to her mouth and lets out a dainty giggle before backing away to the rest

>Next up is the orange one with the Stetson

>”Howdy Anon, mah name is Applejack” She says while holding out a hoof

>Southern accent, from her toned body she might be a farmer of some sort

>Southerners tended to be friendly, valuing honesty, hardwork, and their loved ones above all else

“Great to meet yo-o-o-o-o-u!” you say as you grasp the offered hoof, which Applejack shakes with enough force to almost take your arm out of it’s socket

>”Oops, mah bad Anon, didn’t hurt ya did Ah?” She asks with a concerned expression

“Not at all, I just wasn’t prepared for your strength, you’re in great shape Applejack” you say as you roll your arm a few times

>Her face flushes a bit at the complement “Aw shucks…”

>Well, that seems to be…

>Wait, where’s the fifth one?

>Looking behind the others you spy a yellow pegasus trying to look as small as she can

>Everyone else turns to look at her as well

>Realizing she was next, the pegasus slowly walked up and introduces herself, while trying to hide her face behind her mane

>”Um-m, I’m Flutters…”

>The shy one, more likely to confide in animals or another medium rather than others

>Confidence issues most likely

>Ones like her tend to be sweet and tender once pulled out of there shells and be explosive when truly angered

“Care to repeat that? I didn’t quite catch your name”

>”…F-fluttershy, Im Fluttershy…”

>Easing your expression to the tenderest one you can you kneel down to eye level with her

“Glad to meet you”

>The simple sentence and expression pull a minuscule smile from Fluttershy as she reveals her face

>Hnnng, is this what diabetes feels like?

>Standing back up you look at the different p0nies in the room

>Twilight is thrilled that things went off without a hitch

>Pinkie still had her megawatt smile while bouncing in place

>Rainbow seemed to be sizing you up

>Rarity is inspecting your black wife-beater and jeans rather than you

>Applejack is looking up at you with a friendly face that seemed tailor fit for her

>Finally Fluttershy is looking down at her hooves with a frequent glance up at you

>Yep, you could already tell

>Boredom would be in short supply here