- >What the hell is going on in here?
 - "What the fuck are you three doing in my house?"
 - >The CMC look to you.
 - >Scootaloo starts to run, "Cheese it, it's him!"
 - >They scatter like cockroaches in the light.
 - >You see that Sweetie Belle has something in her magical grasp.
 - >She slides it into her saddlebags before you can read what it is.
 - "What the hell did you just take!?"
 - >They are already out the door and close to the forest when you look to them.
 - >Looking at the pile of magazines they-
 - >No.
 - >They fucking didn't.
 - >They took...
 - >Your last Playboy magazine.
 - >Well, the one that wasn't ruined with stains and 'other' fluids.
 - "Those fuckers."
 - >Donning your favorite wetsuit and ski mask, you run to intercept the little runts to their tree house.
 - >With a impossible speed, putting healthy kenyans to shame, you run the mile to the the tree house.
 - >Three minutes? Nice.
 - >With the speed, you jump to the top of the tree house and you see the three run out.
 - >"How did he get here so fast!?"
 - >"Ahm nawt shure, but we need tah get out while we can!"
 - >Jumping down, you grab Scootaloo by her back legs.
 - >Doing your best Batman voice, you shout.
 - "WHERE IS IT!?"
 - >You attach a small cable to her legs and hold her over the edge.
 - >She's scared out of her fucking mind.
 - >Good.
 - >"Applebloom has it, I swear to Celestia!"
 - "SWEAR TO ME!"
 - >You drop her over the edge and watch as the cable goes taut(?).
 - >She starts to dangle there.
 - >"Somepony, help! Please!"
 - "Stay there."
 - >Running the way Applebloom left, you realise she was heading towards the farm.
 - >Getting to the farm, you get there in record time, you see her heading into the barn.
 - "Good little rat."
 - >Running in, you see one thing.
 - >Applebloom shocked by what she sees.
 - >Her brother balls deep in Applejack.
 - "..."
 - >"Uhh, hey Applebloom."
 - >Mac nods to you, "Anon."
 - "Mac, nice to see you, how, uhh, how ya doin'?"
 - >"Was about tah blow mah load, until lil' bloom came in, then you."
 - "Well..."
 - >Applebloom is still scared stiff.
 - "I'm just going to borrow her for a minute."
 - >"Why do yah need tah do thaht?"
 - "She has my last adult magazine."
 - >Mac simply closes his eyes and nods.
 - >Applejack, however, "Why did y'all take the magazine?"
 - >"We wanted our Cutie marks ihn reading ahdult magazines."
 - >Dragging her out, you yell.
 - "WHERE IS IT!?"
 - >"Last ah saw, Sweetie had it!"
 - "You better not be lying."
 - >Dropping her, you race towards Ponyville towards Carousel Boutique.
 - "Time for the final boss."
 - >Arriving at the boutique, you enter and see Rarity.
 - >"Anon, darling, whatever are you here to do?"
 - "Tell me where your little demon sister is, you marshmallow whore."
 - >She looks taken back, "She's u-upstairs."
 - >Kicking in the door, you look at the small filly.
 - "WHERE IS IT, YOU LITTLE SHE-DEMON?"
 - >She's scared by your yelling and flings your magazine into the air.
 - >Doing a slow-motion jump into the air, you scream.
 - "NOOOOO!"
 - >"Anon, how are you making the magazine and yourself move that slow?"
 - >Catching the magazine, you land on both of your feet, and do a little move.
 - "I got it, you little whore. Mission accomplished."
 - >Suddenly, Pinkie on your ear piece, "Good job, Anon, now get back to base for a good payment."
 - "Well, seeya bitch, time for some good times."
 - >Arriving back at your house, you place the magazine in its case and carry Pinkie up to your room.
 - >"So, Anon, how was your day?"
 - "Ehh, it was about the most normal day for me while living with you."
 - >You and Pinkie then cuddled for the rest of the night.
 - >Today was a normal day, in the life of you.
 - >Fuckin' Anonymous.
 

