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FluffyDerp

By: Rat_Chieftain on Jun 28th, 2012  |  syntax: None  |  size: 3.62 KB  |  hits: 231  |  expires: Never
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  1. >It's your birthday
  2. >you are at a little party with just the immediate family.
  3. >Your dad gives you 100$
  4. >Your mom gives you a nice new jacket.
  5. >Your older sister hands you a cage with a cloth over it
  6. >Ohh boy! Is it a puppy?
  7. >Lolnope Its a fluffy pony.
  8. >It's grey and It's eyes are derped.
  9. >Your family thinks its adorable.
  10. >Your sister hates you.
  11. >"Uhh yeah it's cute I'll name her Derpy..."
  12. >Badpokerface.jpg
  13. >After the party you take the cage and put it in the front seat.
  14. >You buckle it in.
  15. >Close the door.
  16. >Get in.
  17. >Close your door
  18. >Aaaand all of the sudden you smell shit.
  19. >"THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT" you scream out.
  20. >The fluffy pony starts crying loudly.
  21. >You bang on the steering wheel and yell out "SHUT THE FUCK UP"
  22. >Fluffy Derpy sobs silently and says "Fwuffy sowy. fwuffy be good, no yell at fwuffy", its barely audible.
  23. >"I TOLD YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP." you say as you punch and shake the cage.
  24. >She is biting her lip trying not to scream.
  25. >You roll down the window and start driving.
  26. >You mumble every swear word you know several times over.
  27. >You get home and drop the cage.
  28. >She eeeps.
  29. >You have no idea how to take care of one of these things.
  30. >You take it out back and hose it down with water and she freaks the fuck out and starts crying again.
  31. >You pick her up by violently grabbing her fur and take her inside and dry her off.
  32. >"Derpy!"
  33. >"Y-yes daddy?"
  34. >"Just stay the fuck out of my way the rest of the day today ok?"
  35. >"yes daddy..."
  36. >You hang the towel up to dry and go to your room.
  37. >You roll a blunt and light it to celebrate the rest of your birthday.
  38. >You look at porn and start stroking your junk.
  39. >All of the sudden you hear scratches at your door.
  40. >You pull your pants up and open the door.
  41. >"Daddy, daddy, Fwuffy hungry! wan sketties!"
  42. >You just stand there, blunt in mouth and give her a cold glare.
  43. >She takes a few steps back.
  44. >You smile at her.
  45. >"Ok Derpy I'll give you all the sketties you can eat just wait a bit ok?" so say in a soft soothing tone as you kneel down and pet her fur.
  46. >Her golden Derpy eyes are kind of cute
  47. >"I love you daddy."
  48. >"...I love you too Derpy."
  49. >You make lots of spaghetti, you think you'll have some too.
  50. >You also preheat the oven.
  51. >You have a horrible case of the munchies.
  52. >"DERPY COME HERE DADDY HAS SKETTIES FOR YOU"
  53. >She runs up to you cheering and jumping flapping her little wings.
  54. >You have a huge plate of sketties in your hand and you make sure to show it to her.
  55. >You set it on the table.
  56. >"One more thing derpy..." you say in a soft tone.
  57. >"Yes daddy?"
  58. >"What did I say about bothering daddy the rest of today?"
  59. >"S-stay the out of yow way today."
  60. >"Don't disobey daddy again ok Derpy?"
  61. >"O-ok fwuffy be good fwom now on, fwuffy no disobey no more."
  62. >You stroke her fur gently again "I know you won't Derpy, That's why daddy loves derpy, you can have your sketties now."
  63. >"Fwuffy love daddy too!" she stands up and leans on the leg of the table awaiting her prize.
  64. >"Ohhh no Derpy, thats daddys sketties. Your sketties is right here"
  65. >./zzzzzip
  66. >You grab her fur again and slam her as hard as you can on your dick.
  67. >"FWUFFY SOWY FLUFFY NO BOTHER DADDY"
  68. >You keep pounding her.
  69. >You notice blood.
  70. >"FWUFFY NO WAN SKETTIES NO MORE"
  71. >You fuck her so hard you swear her eyes went back to normal for a second.
  72. >As soon as you spill your seed she crawls off and curls up into a ball and cries again.
  73. >you pick her up gently and wipe away her tears.
  74. >Then you toss her in the oven.
  75. >You eat your spaghetti while you watch her fur slowly burn and her skin get charred.
  76. >All of the sudden she explodes.
  77. >"Thats going to be a bitch to clean up later..."
  78.  
  79. THE END